Words of a Goon, a final fantasy x-2 fanfic

My name is Yarigusu.

It's hard for people to describe themselves accurately. Everyone has an image of themselves in their mind, whether that be lower or higher than what they really are, but it sometimes differs from how the world and other people really perceive them. And of course, even that can change as different people have different opinions of even the same person at the same moment.

But the way I describe myself is, what I think, accurate. I'm a coward. And I'm not just saying that because I get scared often, which by the way I do, but it's because I did something that no proper solider of Bevelle ever ought to do.

I went AWOL. And I didn't just run away from any old mission either. No, I left my comrades on the shores beside Mushroom Rock Road and abandoned my post at Operation Mi'ihen. I tried to stay, but a fear, one at such an intense high level that I've never experienced it before or since gripped me and fueled my pathetic actions. Even the guilt plaguing my heart afterward could not compare to that fear though.

So, when I caught wind of the worst being over, I returned to beg for forgiveness. On my knees, I went to the survivors of my unit and apologized for being such a spineless deserter. I was ready to accept the penalties for my crimes, but a penalty did not come right away. Shame did though through the disappointed stares of my surviving comrades, their eyes once light with life now heavy in sorrow and loss. Where was I when I was to share that pain? I was five miles that-a-way, shaking like a leaf behind some bushes hyperventilating with my rifle across my feet.

A crime such as mine cannot go unpunished for long, and as ready as I was to accept any fate a few days earlier, when my punishment came a calling I did the one thing that would make the situation worse.

I ran away again.

Away from all the guardsman, the officials ready to judge my crime, the responsibilities, my dignity, rank, and even my right to live as now I was a criminal to the highest degree. I 'refused' to help my fellow Yevonites, then instead of repenting or bravely facing my punishment, I ran away like a fool. It's a crime against Yevon himself, and it puts the death warrant on you in an instant.

I ditched my clothes in a hurry, leaving my pants as I feared having to run through Spira less than half-naked. I stole, me who never so much as took a man's pencil, someone's clothes off of a line and dashed away as more guardsman came clamoring after me.

I unfortunately, even without my uniform to point me out, have very distinct characteristics that sell me out. First being my pale white shoulder-length hair. Second, my meek attitude points me out in a crowd of prideful Spirians any day, and third, my nervousness always gave me away when I spoke, if my wispy mild voice itself didn't.

Oh, Yevon, why do I create such woe for myself? Why couldn't I be a good proper solider as my father always wanted me to be? He's turning in his grave now for certain, along with mother and grandmother, who always bet on whether or not my meekness would be grown out of or not.

Grandmother won the bet. I was still meek and a chicken on top of all that.

For weeks I ran all over Spira. Up the mountain of Gagazet, down it again, tried to get back into Bevelle for my belongings before abandoning that thought and running into the Macalania Woods.

In the woods I thought that I'd surely be devoured by a fiend. But I suppose the creatures in the woods didn't want to eat a spineless jelly-legged creature such as myself. I only had to out run a fiend or two, who blinked at me absentmindedly, before giving chase for fun and then turning back to their spots to sleep.

I then made my way through the Thunder Plains, having made it out of the woods alive, and cried like a baby as I hit a really bad storm and bolts were striking the ground all around me. For a grown man, I'm well aware I'm pathetic.

I dashed through Guadosalam without looking at much of anyone. Swam over the Moonflow as I was worried to be recognized on the Shoopuf's- though I know now after some thought that it was a silly idea and could have well ridden. After all, who was to recognize me? A Hypello?

I had a hit and miss with some bandits, was swiftly booted out of Luca, stowed-away on a boat to Kilika, was strangely recognized by the Kilikan Guards and was arrested. Picking the locks, I escaped into the woods where I hid for more than two days. Eating bark off of trees and drinking from the river when I was certain no guards were near.

After some thought and careful planning, I again stowed away on a boat and headed to a small southern island named Qidokio, where I lived among the kind though a bit suspicious locals. An altar and pavilion lined with statues of the High Summoners served as a place of prayer for them and I made use of it in my begging for forgiveness and asked for aid in my situation.

I stowed away on another boat as the locals started to question me and I started to get nervous when they informed me about how a monk and a few guardsmen were coming to the island to inspect the altar. I was caught stowing away and was put in the brig of the ship. Someone on the ship recognized me as a wanted man and I again prayed for my safety from Yevon.

In a rather odd way, Yevon answered as the boat was tossed about in another storm and I was thrown through a break in the hull from a craggy rock. Though in most cases this would mean death, I swam until I could no longer even keep my eyes open. Accepting this as proper punishment from Yevon, I let myself sink…five feet to a coral reef where the waves just pushed me ten feet to an island.

This island's name was Didiusi and was a quite peaceful place. A simple stone circle in their woods was their place of prayer, diminished statues of the High Summoners watching over the stone. I made use of that in thanking him for my safety.

News came of Sin's demise than and, like every Spirian, I celebrated with the village with much happiness and delight and it was during one of the dances that I was too shy to take part in that the village leader's daughter became smitten with me. I don't know what the girl was thinking, and though a rare beauty, I couldn't return the sixteen year old's feelings no matter how hard I tried. It wasn't that she wasn't a witty and fun girl that would make a good bride, it was just that while she was in her teens I was in my mid-twenties. To me, the age difference didn't seem right and I of course shied my way out of it like I do everything else.

She was none to pleased with my reaction of her love confession and her father was outraged. Not at the fact that I wouldn't accept her but rather that my 'evil' good looks lured her in the first place. I tried to protest, even informing him that I wasn't really all that good looking and that she only liked the fact that I had light hair as everyone else on the island had dark, but this arrogant man would not listen to me. Exercising his authority, he chased me into the woods with the assistance of his kinsman and volunteers, who hated how I kept 'luring' girls with my looks, and I hid yet again for an undetermined amount of days. I put it in an estimate of about five days before the 'princess' found me, gave me a sound slap, and told me to leave the island forever, kindly giving me a row boat in the process.

I rowed the chain of islands, never stopping more than a day in village and sleeping under the row boat on a non-used beach if I could help it, before I finally hit the small Temple island of Besaid. The villagers were most welcoming there and I took a whole day and a night praying before heading out again, claiming I was a traveling fisherman, if there was such a thing, and waved my good byes to the locals who for some reason came to see me off. I was glad to be reminded that kind people existed.

I floated around a bit, having lost my oar to a non-friendly fiend that gobbled it up and left, before a storm hit me and my small little vessel full force. I held onto the gangways while turning green before waking up, my rowboat barely held together, and pushed against Kilika. From there, I worked a bit mending fishing nets, and earned enough money to get on a boat back to Luca. There I ran out of money and walked my rather dirty and smelly self, since frankly I had only been bathing in cheap perfumed sea water up until then, out of Luca, still afraid to be recognized.

On the Mi'ihen, I ran into no problems that I couldn't run away from. That being every problem one encounters on the Mi'ihen that I just simply quailed and bolted away in my fearful way that I do things. I'm not proud of myself. I want you to know that.

I sat on the edges of the Moonflow before being abducted by a granny who paid my way across. For some reason, because I think she was blind, she thought I was a lost little boy and even made up a story for me about how she was sure my mother was on the other side looking for me. I tried to speak against it, I really did, but my cursed nervous stuttering and meekness didn't let the right words out before I was riding on the Shoopuf with the old lady. Who was really nice by the way and didn't smell like moth balls like most old ladies do, but more like ginger cookies. Definitely the opposite of my grandmother.

I bowed and said goodbye to her after helping her off. Then finding that she was the one a little lost, I led her down the road to Guadosalam, where I reluctantly left her at a more cheaper and smaller inn. The man behind the counter said he'd help her, and he had a pretty wholesome face so I believed him, then I muttered a thank you to Yevon, receiving a few gasps around me, before promptly running away as people started to angrily throw stuff at me.

With some caution, I looked through trashcans for old newspapers and caught myself up on generally what has happening in Spira. I was admittedly sad about Yevon. But I still caught myself praying to him just the same.

I then sat on a bench outside another inn, the main one that served most of the people traveling through Guadosalam. I was surprised to see the lack of Guado, but decided to keep my mouth shut lest someone throw something else at my head.

I contemplated whether or not to join with 'New Yevon' now that they were reforming. But then again, I didn't seem to deserve to go back either. After all, they may still recognize me and I was still no better of a man that abandoned his comrades.

That was when I heard a most peculiar sound.

"Hiya!"

I looked up to see a hunched man in dark green standing right in front of me. I blinked. Was he really addressing me?

"Dude…" He said slowly, "When someone say's 'hiya' you say 'hiya' back."

Cripes, he really was talking to me!

His goofy voice didn't calm my nerves any. Though he didn't smell of danger or battle, as some more brutish men did, he had claws over one of his dark gloves, sinister and sharp. His face was covered by a dark black mask that had a white emblem of a heart with two circles in the heart's two rises, concealing any expression or give-away to what he might do. I swallowed, because I didn't know what to say, and I didn't know if the man was angry with me for my silence.

"Just say hiya," The voice was displeased and he stood straighter and crossed his arms over his chest. I then realized that I had been opening and closing my mouth like a beached fish.

"H-hiya," I managed in a girly squeak. I cursed myself inwardly and instantly wanted to meld into the bench I was sitting on, never to be seen again.

"Taji!" A rough voice yelled for him up the hill. Another was dressed in the same dark green as the one standing in front of me just like it was a uniform.

"Whh~uut?" The goofy sounding 'Taji' dragged on his words and though he was the one that should've been worried when the other lifted his head, obviously mad with his attitude, I was the one that stiffened and yelped.

The other stomped down the slope, pulled on the guy's mask, and dragged him back to the door and yanked him back into place beside the door's frame. From there he took his own place back on the other side. I swallowed, glad that it was over as he started lecturing that irresponsible other about his guard duties, whatever they were guarding.

I sighed and put my hands on my knees, my head sinking a little. Then I heard the sound again.

The goofy voice called to me, "Hey! Hey! Pssst! Hey! Psst!"

I reluctantly looked up. He waved me over, and after hesitating and looking at the more serious one, I lightly walked up to him. I then realized how much taller I was than him.

"Hey," The goofy guy tilted back a little to look up at me, "What's your name anyways?"

"Y-yarigusu." I answered, my cursed stuttering making me look like a fool yet again.

He didn't judge, in fact I think he might've been a bit of an idiot, "Y-yarigusu huh?" He wasn't mocking me, he seriously thought that was my name, "That's a hard name to say."

"No, Yarigusu," I said more clearer.

"Oh, my bad, still hard to say though," He lifted up his hands, "Say!" he smiled, or it seemed that way with the lightness in his voice, "You got something to do?"

"No…"I turned my head slightly. This one was just full of energy. I wasn't really sure if I should stay, feeling he wanted something from me.

"Why not?" He leaned closer, and I took a step back, "It's the middle of the day in the middle of the working week and you're telling me you got nothing to do?"

"I-I'm currently in unemployment," I took another step back. I was almost ready to run. Unexpectedly, another green clad man hopped from the bridge right behind me. I yelped and both the one in front of me and the one behind me seized up each of my arms.

No one seemed bothered by it, except for their comrade on the other side of the steps.

"Play nice," Is all that he said, if you could call that bothered.

"We~will!" The two promised in unison before pushing me through the great doors of Seymour's mansion and shut it behind them with a slam. I was trapped. Utterly hopelessly trapped between two psychos. This was the end of me, and I knew it.

Right inside wasn't a Guado, as I expected, though someone just as tall. He had a lean face, pinched eyes, and an unhappy frown just for me as the two men pushed me into the mansion.

"What is it you two idiots dragged in this time?" He looked at me like I was a stay cat or puppy that two children took in to the house without permission.

"Lookit Logos!" The one that had jumped off the bridge shook my arm a little and then giggled like a school-girl, even though he was a boy by his voice, "He says he's unemployed."

"Let's take him to the Boss!" The other named 'Taji' said with great excitement dripping from his voice.

Boss? I thought, Dear Yevon they were some sort of gang with a scary gang leader that would tear off my-

"Put him back," The blue coated and pinched faced man sneered at my trembling legs. "He's not going to be worth it."

"Says you!" Taji made a raspberry sound, though no one could see his tongue because of the flap of a mask in front of his face, though the mask did move out a little with his excess air.

"We'll be nice to him," The other one that held me promised.

"You didn't just pick him off the street did you?" The blue coated man leaned over me, his towering height shadowing my average size. My knees buckled and the two green clad men was the only things holding me up. He was still talking about me like I was a stray animal.

"Yes…" The two holding my arms admitted, their shoulders falling a little, and their heads looking down at the ground in shame.

"Ugh…" The tall man stood straight and pinched the bridge of his nose, "I'm sorry that they forced you in here. Don't be so jittery."

I realized quickly that he was talking to me. I was a bit relieved he really didn't think of me as a cat or a dog. Though the conversation with me was already over and he turned to the two that held me.

"Taji, Daji, how many times do I have to tell you?" He narrowed his already small eyes, "Ask them if they want to join then, don't, just grab them but escort them nicely back here, got it?"

"And if they refuse then grab them!" They both said in unison, and with their similar names, I deduced that they were twins.

"No! You sand-sniffing twits!"

I then deduced they were probably Al Bhed.

The tall 'Logos' sighed deeply and shook his head, pinching the bridge of his nose again. He opened one eye and looked down at me with a fierce stare that I felt right to the back of my head.

"What was your name?"

"Y-yarigusu."

"Well, Yarigusu," He cleared his throat, "Let me apologize for these two idiots. They can't get a lot of things right."

"Hey!"

"Shut up and let him go already," He snapped, turning his head to them. They put their hands up in the air beside their heads in defeat, their palms facing out, before shuffling past me and him and into doors in front of me under a set of stairs.

I swallowed as he turned back to me, his expression reading irritated. Though I wasn't the one that made him that way, I didn't want to give him cause to take it out on me.

"Let me explain their error," He stood straight and turned slightly, as if he was going to leave as soon as he finished explaining, "We're hiring able-bodied warriors of different kinds you see, for our sphere-hunting group. They take it as grab whatever unemployed person they can find. Sorry for the misunderstanding, you can leave if you want."

And as what he appeared he was going to do, he really did turn back to the stairs, ready to duck under them into the door as the two had done before him.

"W-wait!" I surprised myself, and a part of me wondered why I had done it in the first place. I wasn't particularly desperate yet, but then again I was always eager for job, "I-I'm sort of an able-bodied warrior or…something. Like. That." I slowly let out my words as he stared at me.

"Is that so?" He smirked a bit, one side of his mouth lifting a little. I swallowed hard, not feeling relaxed in the slightest from his reaction.

He turned to look at me, "What makes you an able-bodied warrior?"

I knew I didn't look it. I was shaking, badly, and I had a loose white shirt over my pale shoulders and loose brown breeches. I lost my shoes a while back, which is why I don't want to travel any farther north than Guadosalam anymore. I looked more like a poor person, than a warrior. Though, even in the army I never would've called myself that.

"I was in the Yevon army," I then flinched, ready for him to throw something at me.

"So what?" he scoffed, "So was half of Spira. That doesn't make you a good fighter."

I lowered my shoulders, "Uhm, well, I can uhm, I like knives."

"Alright," His expression softened. He obviously decided to be patient with me, "Are you really interested in the job or are you just wasting my time for no reason?"

"No, I really want to become a sphere- looker something-" I stuttered and he corrected me, "Sphere-hunter."

"Yes, a sphere-hunter," I furrowed my brows as I focused on polite and careful words that wouldn't make me look like an idiot, if the guy didn't already think I was, "I'm really uhm, well, I am a bit cowardly but-" Too late, I made myself look like an idiot, but I tried to fix myself, "I mean! I ran away from Operation Mi'ihen but I won't run away from this I swear! Erm, I know I don't deserve to really, you know, live, for leaving my comrades to die. And you're probably disgusted with me, but I was just- scared but uh, despite that I want you to know I'm good at shooting a gun and I like knives so-uh," I saw he was covering his face with his hand so I stuttered, "I-I'll just leave now." My face must've been bright red by then.

"No, don't do that," He lifted his other hand and I could see he was actually laughing at me. Or more like cackling at me in a nasally and evil sounding guffaw.

I wanted to disappear into the floor.

"You like to talk don't you?" He raised himself up and lowered his hand, his face back to the partially frowning set it was before.

"Erm, no, not really," I supposed I should've went on to explain that I have difficulty talking because I get so nervous. Not to mention that I have a horrible stutter and anxiety attacks.

He looked down at me from his towering height and with seriousness in his voice he asked me, "I'll ask you one more time, do you want to become a sphere-hunter?"

"You mean you don't care that I'm a hopeless deserting coward that- you know what closing my mouth now," Like I said, I snapped my mouth shut. He raised a corner of his mouth before letting it fall. I muttered, "Yes, if you have a job for me I'm interested. I kinda need it."

"We'll see," He flicked his head a little, gesturing towards the rooms upstairs.

He turned and I followed him up the curved stairs to the room in the center of the dual steps. He knocked, and a very feminine voice answered with a 'Come in, love.'

My first impression of Leblanc? Well, I should rather say my first reaction to her was subtle, or I should hope so. I'm sure the color on my pale cheeks was noticeable and I don't have a face that would just pass off as naturally rosy, so that much must've been obvious. As for the rest of my body? I hoped my baggy pants sufficed to hide my 'reaction'.

What can I say? She was incredibly well, for the lack of a better word, sexy and open with it. But, as I quickly learned, she was also serious about what she did and quick about her actions.

"This another one?" She looked at the blue coated man, Logos was his name right, and he nodded. In front of her was a female, short brown hair, round brown eyes and a rectangular earring in one ear and a robust man of average height and thick, very thick, build. He was wearing something similar to the tall man beside me, only in purple instead of blue, and they both looked like a far off variation of the green guards out the front door. The girl was wearing a tight outfit that matched everyone else's minus the darker colors as her's was pink. As for the leader of them all...

Her dress of tight material was hot pink, fit snug against the curves of her body, and her front was proudly displayed in a open area exposing her cleavage, naval, and slightly concave stomach. I swallowed as she looked at me with her big golden brown eyes.

"What is your name? What was your past occupation? What are you skills, and don't be modest and please list them all, no matter how trivial, unless of course it's something as useless as nose-whistling. And your age could be thrown in there somewhere though it really doesn't matter so long as I don't get charged with child labor or kidnapping if you are a run away," She looked me up and down, "Which I doubt by the look of you, you're probably twenty four, twenty five maybe?"

"T-twenty s-six." My cursed stutter strikes again! But I was impressed with her skills in guesstimating my age.

"Well, answer my other questions," She nodded her head and firmly requested I speak after the pause that followed. I cleared my throat.

"My name's Yarigusu. I worked as a Yevonite Defender but I couldn't grow a beard," I cursed myself under my breath. The blue coated one smirked at me, I'm sure he wanted to laugh. I went on-, "I like knifes a lot. Though, I don't know if the interest them is enough to be good in it. I'm tidy I guess, I've been told that anyways. I don't have any family though I guess that's not really important to you, but oh, wait I mentioned it because no one would report me kidnapped like you worried about, but uhm, well," I looked down at the floor, done making a fool of myself. "I really need this job. Yevon won't have me back because I'm a deserter of Operation Mi'ihen." I clamped my mouth. For the sake of getting a job, I should probably stop mentioning that!

"Operation Mi'ihen guy huh?" She put her purple gloved hand to her chin, "I already have tons of men like you, tell me what you can do for me that's different, love."

"I can make macaroni," I slapped a hand over my mouth and muttered, "Stupid!" Then blushed at how loud it came out.

The thick warrior tilted back his head and laughed so loud that it boomed in my eardrums and chest alike. It didn't sound like haha like most people but more of a, "BWAHAHAHAHA!"

She was tilting her nose to the side a little and smiled down at me, which did little for my nerves but know that she probably felt pity on the poor mother who brought this failing-in-all-aspects-of-life poor person into the world.

"T-that's good love, but I meant perhaps other fighting skills, or something you're really good at," She lowered her hand, at first trying not to laugh at me before politely composing herself. Despite her looks, I found her very professional, "Something that other people really can't do is what I meant."

"I c-can hear well," I put my hands up behind my ears. My grandmother used to say I could hear a pin drop in a crowd because of the round way my ears were shaped and how they kinda stuck out a little too far.

"That's good," She relaxed her shoulders, which I didn't know she tensed in the first place. I guess she was glad I wasn't a complete idiot. "Any specialty in weaponry or fighting style?"

"Basic hand to hand combat training," I looked up from my bangs, "And artillery which is expected of a solider. I do manage high-explosives being a Defender as well."

She slapped her hip, which I'll find to be a odd habit of hers, and said "Good love, fill this out and you got the job." She turned to a cabinet, opened it's decorative outside, and pulled out a piece of paper, then handed it to me, "I don't like having everyone fill this out before hand because it might waste a lot of them from the people we say no to."

"But she hasn't said no to anyone yet," The brown haired girl winked at me, and color must've raised in my cheeks again because she giggled. I took a pencil from the gunner, now that I had unexpectedly fallen to my knees I could see at his hips two silvery gray revolvers, of a peculiar design might I add, attached to a belt under three overlapping ones of varying pink and one blue shade. Wait? How'd I get to my knees? That's when I knew why the brown haired girl laughed at me. In my relief of having a job, I fell to my knees.

"Alright, Ormi!" The 'Boss' turned to the wide set one, not surprised of my reaction to her hiring me in the least, "Take Yarigusu down to the basement and show him where his room is! And Logos, get him a uniform that fits."

'Ormi' saluted, but not in a Yevon way but a slap to the forehead with the side of your hand way, and nodded, "Yes Boss!" I'll later learn that that's the way everyone salutes around here. The gunner was less showy and less loud in replying his own, "Yes, Boss."

She turned to me, "Alright. Here's the rules. My name is Leblanc, but you'll address me as 'Boss' alright? You do as I say, or as Logos and Ormi says, because they do what I say. If you have any questions stop someone and ask. We're used to dumb questions by now so don't be afraid if you don't know something. It's better than messing it up entirely. Because then we'll be pissed."

"Y-yes," I smiled, "B-boss."

I was quickly adjusted into a green uniform, and only after I was showed to my room did it hit me.

"I-I should probably mention that I'm wanted." I swallowed hard when the two men, Logos and Ormi, turned and looked at me over their shoulders. "I d-deserted O-Operation Mi'ihen and t-that is punishable with d-death or jail b-but I kinda, ran again, so in the Army-"

"Yeah," Ormi interrupted me with a loud strange accent I couldn't detect from where it came from, "We's know's all 'bout that stuff. We's worked for Yevon too, ya know?"

"Uhm-" I blew a little bit of white hair that fell into my face.

"Your concerned of the penalty?" Logos lifted an eyebrow, "Don't be. With the reforming, I doubt anyone would care."

"B-but," I knew I sounded cowardly, but really, I was concerned about their business and how I'd bother them. Though maybe really I should be if they hired convicts and wanted men like it was nobodies' business.

"What? If you really worried than all you have to do is this," Logos lifted up three fingers, "Change your name, change you general appearance, and keep low by starting a new life. Seeing as you already had the last one done, and I suppose you have the first two already out of-"

"I never thought of that," I squeaked when he narrowed his eyes a bit.

"That's the first thing most wanted men do," Logos wasn't angry, but I couldn't read his expressions quite yet, and still kinda can't. After all, his expressions usually vary from subtle changes of his original grimacing frown.

"I didn't really think-"

"Alright name, uh, what was your's name again?" Ormi quickly swooped in to help me.

"Y-yarigusu."

Ormi bellowed happily, "Wehlp, now's it's Yamusu!"

"Why Yamusu?" Logos turned slightly and bent a little at the shoulders to look down at his shorter companion.

"Cause it's easier to say than Yarigusu," Ormi then promptly reached under his arm bands and brought out a knife.

I panicked, "What are you doing?"

"What else?" Ormi grabbed a firm hold of my shoulder and made me stop moving, his knife tight in his other hand, "Step two!"

I didn't want to know how he'd change my appearance using a knife and quailed back.

Logos helped him still my shoulders and held me in place as Ormi lifted the knife. I screwed my eyes shut before feeling the pull against my scalp. I looked up to see that Ormi was busy hacking at my white hair. Strands fell and after a while, he just blew at the few floating in the air around his face and re sheathed his knife into his arm band below his gauntlets.

With shaking hands I reached up to feel my hair that I presumed was all gone. I felt a weird fluffiness, apparently what my hair does when it's short, and a few strands freely stuck out at the sides. Ormi turned around, the shiny shield on his back in my face, and he boomed, "Take a look!"

I was still holding my hair as I looked at the face that really was a bit of a stranger to me. Pieces of my white hair framed my face by my narrow light green eyes and, like I had felt, on each side of my head some clumps stuck out like wings on my head in level with the strands that framed my face. It actually made my face look narrower, and I started wondering if the island girls were on to something about my looking good.

"Hrm," Logos leaned behind and yanked a strand forcefully off the back of my head. It was still long and showing that Ormi had missed a spot before he brushed it to the ground, "There. Now there are no complaints?"

"No sir!" I shook my head vigorously, slightly dazed.

Ormi was already shuffling out the door as the gunner turned on his heel to follow him.

"Good," He walked out the door of my new room, as apparently being homeless assigned you a place here, then finished what he was saying, "Your first job is to clean up that mess."

I looked down at my feet. Stands of white laid in clumps against the maroon carpet.

I smiled anyways and bent down to pick it up with my fingers before inspecting my room for myself.

There was a wastebasket of the wicker sort that I discarded my cut hair into. There was a pallet on the floor, as I was already informed that if I wanted a bed I'd have to get it myself. Above that, against the corner of the room was a dark colored drawer set, two drawers and a shelf underneath, then a picture of Leblanc on the top. I put that in the first drawer. I don't know why but it did give off a 'I'm watching you' feel and I wanted to have a little privacy.

The rooms walls were purple with the insignia of the syndicate. The floor was wood, though not splintery and rather smooth, and there was a table in the corner for my use. Red benches stretched along two sides of the room for sitting. The walls were bare from other decoration though there was some trappings hanging from the ceiling.

Over all, the room was comfy. At least it was a lot more homey than the dorms in the Yevon Army.

I eventually, after putting my old set of clothes in a drawer, and being that was my only belongings with me minus what was in my pockets, I gathered courage to go outside and meet some of my new comrades. I was immediately thrown into a strange and alien world of very goofy and very loud people.

The one that I learned to be Daji came up to me first thing, his face beaming as his mask was pinned to the side, and I verified what I thought about him. He was Al Bhed, and he was hyper.

"Hey! Hey!" He shoved a clattering something into my hands. I looked down to find a pair of sharpened three pronged claws in my hands. I slipped it over my gloved hand and he finished his thought with a thumbs-up at me, "Can't go without one of these! Looks good."

I squeezed my hand experimentally. It may take some time to get used to using it, but I admired the way the blade gleamed. What can I say? I have a thing for knives, and bladed claws aren't much different.

I soon met another of the Operation Mi'ihen survivors. He didn't really flat out ran away like me. Rouk, a doctor there, was mistaken for dead and was left behind. His family thinks of him as a war hero, but a dead one, and he never really brought himself to ever going back home and bursting their bubble. I should've been glad that I found a comrade, not one that I knew personally sure, but a comrade none the less, but I didn't. In fact, I felt a little shame. He was nearly killed, though not completely dead like he was thought to of be, but if I had been there maybe...

I doubt I'd affected his life. But at least I wouldn't have AWOL branded to my ass.

"I heard about you," Rouk's rough voice surprised me. I looked up from where I stared at my hands, which the female goon I met in Leblanc's room earlier was massaging because it was her 'special skill'. It felt good and I was lost in the feel and my own free thoughts before Rouk's words brought me back.

"Y-yeah?" I whispered a bit, shy. I damn myself for being so meek!

"You ran away before Operation Mi'ihen even started, huh?" Rouk was cutting chunks from a pear with his own fearsome bladed claws.

He pulled a chunk between two of the prongs, balanced, and sucked into his mouth to slowly chew on it as he stared at me with steely gray eyes. I swallowed.

"Logos told me," He said between chews after I had said nothing. I looked out of the corner of my eyes where the gunner sat by one of the tables in their so-called 'living room' and revised my resume, changing my name. He looked up, then I changed the direction my gaze quickly before he saw me, or at least I think I was fast enough.

I slowly nodded to Rouk.

"Good, a kid like you shouldn't have seen it," Rouk stabbed the fruit again and ripped at the pear's skin for another chunk.

He was serious in what he had said so I relaxed, though the relentless stabbing of poor fruit did put me a little on edge.

"Hey, I didn't catch your name, Slick," An Al Bhed woman, exposed on her face as she too pinned her mask back, sashayed to my side as the masseuse-goon Mara rubbed between my knuckles.

"Yar- Yamusu. It's Yamusu," I nodded afterward.

"Yamusu huh?" She leaned forward, her bouncy breasts almost having a sound effect of their very own, "Cool name."

I leaned away, "T-thank you?" I never had been easy going with women, particularly attractive ones. And even as a Yevonite I had no prejudice against Al Bhed. But that didn't make me any less uncomfortable with her leaning her perky well endowed self towards me.

I guess she took my action of leaning away as uninterested, or possibly disgusted, because she pursed her lips and moved away with a, "Hope we can be friends."

I smiled, "I hope so too." I guess I sounded cheery, though I'm not good at cheery, because she smiled warmly at my covered face.

"What do ya look like anyways?" She reached for my mask and I flinched, involuntarily of course. Before I apologized she laughed, "Easy, I won't bite."

She moved the mask and Mara looked up, "Hey, you cut your hair."

I felt the fluffy bangs press into my forehead, "Uh, yeah..."

"Cool, so did I when I first came here," A straight voice over to the side of me dully said. I turned my head to a white haired girl, just like me, only her pale face was black lipped with and her forest green eyes were surrounded by black eyeliner and mascara. She had several piercings jutting out of each ear, and her half lidded eyes only looked partially interested at me. She turned away with a 'hm' as soon as I looked at her and kept my eyes there.

She kept talking, though not looking at me still, "Ormi chopped it off when you said you were wanted didn't he?"

"He does that a lot?" I asked and received several 'yes's' from the Goons around me. Guess I wasn't the only one hiding their identity.

"I'm jus' tryin' to help," Ormi frowned a little before putting his hands on his hips, "Sue me."

"It's fine!" I don't like confrontation, though I guess there wasn't any. But I quickly apologized anyways, "I'm sorry if it seemed like-"

"Don't be so jittery," A Fem-Goon rubbed her arms, "You make me nervous."

"Oh, sorry, I mean!" I slapped myself in the head, forgetting I had heavy claws attached, and Mara barely backed away from my hand before the claws nearly scraped her nose. "I'm sorry!"

"Damn klutz, you're making Erie seem like she's a damn professional," The Al Bhed woman leaned on my head, her elbow propping her body up. I shifted as her breasts were right to the side of my head and I didn't dare look at them. She gestured toward the goth looking one.

"Shut up, Anomi." The goth hissed. I shivered when she bared her teeth. Then I settled back down as soon as 'Anomi' leaned off of my head.

We were waiting for the Boss as was what was ordered. I vaguely wondered what was taking her so long.

The one that told me to not be so jittery laughed and kindly introduced herself, "Hi, I'm Zizi."

"Nice to meet you," I nearly brought up my clawed hand than lowered it and brought up my other, "Erm, sorry."

She laughed, and didn't shake my hand, probably wise since I might blunder that up as well. She leaned away and told me, "You're weird."

"That's not exactly what you say to someone," A goon with a slightly different uniform, a lighter green in color than the other really dark green of the males, leaned into her back, his chin on the top of her head, "Z."

"Who asked you, Nago?" She looked over her shoulder with a huff. I'll later learn that the lighter green uniform meant you were at the rank of a' Mr. Goon' though I wonder who came up with that ranking system.

"I just thought I'd state my opinion!" He was still leaning into her back and relaxing his chin on her head.

Did anyone around here talk quietly? Or have boundaries?

A swish of paper brought my attention back to Logos who swatted at an Al Bhed teenager, Taji I think since he seemed the more boyish than his twin, who made faces at him past his pinned mask as the gunner rapidly wrote on other pieces of paper. I don't know what he was doing, but it seemed like he might shoot Taji in the face foe pestering him. For the sake of avoiding a argument, I waved Taji over.

"Yeah?" He stood straight as soon as he got to me. I was admittedly starting to feel a little crowded. But I guess that's the price of being the 'new' guy. I wouldn't be for long I guess, then I'll get space.

"I was uh, wondering-" I looked at him straight in the face, "How long does it take for the Boss to get here?"

"She's here," He gestured toward the back door that was wide open and I was surprised to see a huge list of things in her hand.

She started passing them out, walking down the line, around the table without really looking at it as if she knew it was there, showing how adjusted she was to the place already, before handing the last piece besides the part for herself to Anomi. "Get going."

I take it that was spheres and things of that nature because everyone took off with their assignments, some in pairs or more as the papers instructed, muttering about waves and other things I really don't understand because I don't care about spheres. So why did I take this job? I guess beggars can't be choosers. I've prayed to Yevon all over Spira to help me and I guess this was his way.

Taji pulled up to her side, walking with her and pointing at his face, "What ah 'bout me, Boss?"

"Guard the door." She then looked at me out of the corner of her eye, "You too. Rouk is going on a mission with Zizi and Nago."

"Alright," I stood up and immediately started following the crest-fallen Al Bhed to the front door. He obviously wanted some action and was reduced to staying home. I was actually glad my first assignment was an easy one.

"No fair!" He whined as Leblanc passed him.

"Zip it," Logos snapped and the three 'leader's' of the Syndicate walked past. They moved down the street, heading to Yevon know's where, to grab spheres, or sell them, or whatever sphere hunters do with scraps of white paper in their hands.

Guarding the door apparently consisted of just standing in front of it. Nobody was coming to break in, not a single person, and I didn't expect a horde of people to burst in either. Though I guess there is some cause to as there is valuable things in there. But no burglars were trying to break in before our very eyes, at least at this moment (though later, when I wasn't on duty, three particular girls would slip past and into our home).

I stayed there for hours, occasionally answering Taji's direct questions and added a few 'uh-huh's' to what he was saying about his home. Yep, I found out a lot of things I didn't want to know about everyone that could've waited until later. But all the same, I guess I would've found out eventually.

I shrugged at the last thing he said, "I guess Logos likes her. I don't know. I've only been here a couple of hours!"

"Yeah, well, take my word for it," Taji winked at me, which I could only identify by the bob in his head, "He likes her, a lot. It's more obvious than even how Daji crushes on Nago."

"Alright," I accepted, "But I'm just telling you that I didn't see anything myself. That doesn't mean he doesn't by the way, I'm just saying. I will tell you this, all of you guys are extremely loyal to her, Ormi and Logos no different."

"What makes you say that?"

"Well, I can see it, plainly," I looked out of the corner of my eye from the space of the mask and my actual face, "You know, how you all listen to her and follow her and well, I don't know. It's really warm. It's hard to explain and it's almost alien to me the amount of loyalty you have for her. It's like you're all blind."

"Whaddya mean?" Taji raised himself up, his head erect.

I shook my hands at him, "No, no, I didn't mean it in a bad way! It's uhm, how should I say this? I've been in the army since I was old enough to join. That's quite a bit of years okay? Not too much but enough to see how things are. And that amount of loyalty just isn't in the army. At least not to superiors. There are people who suck up and those who are ignorant to the way of the world and think the army is just. But that's not even close to describing what you have. Hmm, let's see...it's like she can say jump off a bridge and you'll do it."

"Yeah, why not?" He said innocently, plainly.

I blinked, did he really not hear what he just said? "See? That's not normal to me!"

"Well," Taji brought up his hand in thinking, "If Logos and Ormi said jump off a bridge, I'd say, "You first then I'll be right behind ya" but if Leblanc said it, I'd say, "Okay." and jump. But if a stranger said it, I'd say, "Screw you.""

"Yeah the last one comes to my mind as the normal reaction," I sighed, "It's not a bad thing. It's just...strange to me at least."

"You'll join us too," Taji rocked on his heels, lacking the ability to hold still, "Trust me. Just stick with us and you'll understand everything."

"Okay," I tried to understand them now, but I couldn't.

"Well," Taji attempted to give me more of an explanation, "I'd only jump off the bridge if Leblanc said so because I could trust her enough to know that that's the best thing to do at the moment. If Logos and Ormi told me to jump, I'd probably do it, after thinking a little. And a stranger wouldn't care about me, so I wouldn't do it."

"Alright..." I stared at him, "But what if she's wrong?"

"Than where's the trust man?" Taji put his hands out beside his body with his shrug, "I trust her with my life. That's what counts."

"Okay, okay." I held out my hands, "I think I'm starting to understand. I don't think I can wrap my head around it like you all do though."

"Nothing to wrap around," Taji let his hands flop to the side, "It's just something you do. All Goons do it man."

"Oh really?" He said 'Goon' like it was a race of people or a type instead of a job.

"Yep, trust me," He reiterated his earlier thought, "You'll join us too."

My name is Yamusu.

But the way I describe myself is, what I think, accurate. I'm a Goon, through and through. And I'm not just saying that because I work for Lady Leblanc,her Syndicate, and wear a dark green uniform, which by the way I do, but it's because I do something that every Goon does.

I do exactly as the Boss says, without question, because that's just the way things are. I don't try and think about it too much. I don't even really care. But she takes care of me, so I take care of her. It has been exactly two years four months a week and two days since I originally joined the Leblanc Syndicate. I still guard the door, switching shifts between Rouk, who now is proudly a Dr. Goon, or Taji who happens to now be glued to my side most of the time.

I also happen to be Taji's guardian now. Though that really doesn't mean much to the sixteen year old. He'll be old enough soon to do whatever the he wants. But it means a lot to me. Leblanc let me become his guardian because I care about him a lot. He's my friend, and almost a brother. I of course also care about his other half, Daji. Taji worries me the most though. And I do worry about other things concerning them, but that's not really important. What matters is that I care for them as much as I like to think Leblanc cares for the rest of us.

I work under Logos most of the time, being that I'm the only one that manages to steer clear of his easily irritated mood. I like to think of us as friends, though I wonder if the grumpy gunner himself would say as much. When I think hard, and because I know him well enough, I'd know he'd probably say we're just comrades. We do share a companionship I suppose. With Leblanc leading us, connecting us, we all have a companionship bound by the common cause to both please and serve our Lady. That being said...

It's safe to say that if I was asked the bridge question the answer would be...Yeah, I'd jump.

As for my reasons for it, or why all the Goons would do it, I have put thought into that. And the reason is probably different for everyone. I can answer for why I do it.

First, I gambled by putting my trust in someone else's hands again. This was another thing I found strange among my comrades. We, who had all had our trusts broken, had willingly and quickly given up our shaky re-building trust to her. And she surprised me by treating it delicately, so unlike in the army where trust was comparable to wood, sometimes flat and strong, other times loose and about to break. Leblanc hasn't failed me yet so in turn, there's no reason not to trust her! And that's my only reason for keeping my full trust in her hands.

If she said jump, I'd know that even if I died falling off a bridge, it was better than whatever was going to happen if I didn't jump like she told me to. It's not that I've become more helpless. And yes, I've become hopelessly dependent on her but I would like to think that she needs us as much as we need her. I trust her enough to make the right decisions for me, and I hope she could trust me in the same way. That's just the way I naturally think now because life thus far has proven to me that that's the right course of thinking.

As for my blind loyalty that developed. It's better than cowardly worrying about myself. It makes me a better person to take care of her instead of myself. Less selfish, I think.

I'm also less pathetic. Leblanc has shaped me to stop 'sniveling' all the time on missions because it get's on her nerves if I can't work with her. And if I'm not working for her, than as far as she's concerned, I'm working against her and she's zapped me to keep me going and out of her way.

I don't know if anybody else has noticed but I'm really not as cowardly as I once was. I still will hide behind a rock if I get scared, but I will hop out without thinking twice if I hear Leblanc tell me to get out from behind it. See, no one knows me before the me that I am now. But if they did, they'd know that even when my Captain told me to stop hiding against the ground, I couldn't bring myself to get up.

Loyalty just isn't enough for it. I was loyal to Yevon, and I still am, praying and going about the religious holidays same as always. But what I misjudged all of them having as loyalty is actually something more than that. The warmth I felt from them is actually a strange form of love that radiates from all of them, even the more grumpy ones. It's rare in Spira, though common as air in the chateau.

And it has been tested, like all love is. When she ran after Nooj, damn that nearly killed me, not to mention everybody else. And when she took Logos and Ormi to wherever they went, they won't talk about it, to help the Meyvn Nooj, I could barely wait for her to get back. Oh, but Logos and Ormi coming back was nice too.

I guess I'll admit I care a lot more about Leblanc than Logos and Ormi. I want to say it's a brotherly-sisterly affection I have towards Leblanc, but I don't know if it's that either. It's not attraction, like I was concerned it was for awhile. But I now know it's just pure love. Like someone loves a warm day, hugs, oxygen or a soft wind. It's beyond human labeling. I just love it. In fact, I'm damn near addicted to it. Life would become hard living if I ever had to leave the Leblanc Syndicate. I know I'm not the only one who thinks this much, though everyone's personal understanding of how far their own love goes to Leblanc is different. Some can more easily put a name to it than I.

So in short, yeah, I love Leblanc. And so does every Goon. And if you still don't understand why.

Find someone you'd jump off a bridge for and you'll find out.

LOL.

A/N: Should I do my other O.C. goons with this and continue this story or not? Yamusu was my 'true' O.C. as I made him purely up out of my head. As for the others, you can 'spot' them throughout the game, though I doubt I will mention who's-who as I go through the stories.

If I do them, they'll be from the perspective of whatever Goon the story is told from, and it will be their back stories and their thoughts on the Leblanc Syndicate as they join.

Comment your opinion please ^^ And tell me how you liked (Or God forbid hated) the first chapter! R&R makes me a happy person.