"Ness...you're spacing out again..." I could feel my face heating up. I invited Lucas over to my place to help me study but really I just wanted him hang out with me. The only reason why I barely hang out with him is that I was usually hanging out with his twin brother, Claus. Plus, I was so nervous around Lucas and he wasn't very outgoing himself. This was a once in a life time moment and I didn't want to ruin it. "O-Oh, I'm sorry...I'm just so tired today, dude." I tried to keep it cool "You should get some rest and maybe we can study tomor-" Lucas was interrupted by a loud, weird noise I made impulsively. "I mean...We can't quit just yet! You have to stay and help me!" God, how embarrassing but I just really wanted him to stay longer. It was so difficult for me to pay attention I couldn't help but admire Lucas. He has such a nice face, it was so pleasing to look at with that calming look in his blue eyes. Same goes for his voice, so gentle and modulated. He just put me at ease, I could just look and listen to him all day. Maybe I was too much at ease because next thing I know I blacked out and woke up on my bed. I was so confused, I rushed downstairs "Where's Lucas?!" My mom shushed me "You're going to wake up everyone if you keep yelling like that. Anyway, Lucas went back to his place." I didn't reply, I had so many questions. Why didn't he wake me up? Did I fuck up? What if he doesn't want to come over anymore? "Lucas needs to come back right now!" She gave me a quizzical look "You realize it's 2 in the morning, he's probably sleeping by now." She handed me a note and gestured me to go back to my room. I read it as soon as I got in my room
"Hey Ness, sorry for leaving. You seemed really tired so I thought you weren't up for studying today. We can always try again whenever you're up for it. If you want to come by tomorrow after class you'll have to come by my place because my parents are going to be out until late and I'm gonna have to watch over Boney with Claus tomorrow. Any time is cool with me...See you whenever.
-Lucas"
I really wanted to see Lucas as soon as possible so I decided to come over tomorrow.
I had trouble focusing in class the only thing I had in mind was Lucas. I just wanted to see him and we barely shared any classes together. The only time I was able to see him was during lunch break. I oddly couldn't find him today, which kind of got me agitated. At least it was 5 minutes until dismissal. I kept looking at the clock then at my pencil impatiently. Boy, those 5 minutes felt like forever. The bell finally rang, I hastily got up from my seat and pushed my way out of the classroom. I looked around for Lucas while rushing my way out of school until I heard someone shout, "Ness! Slow the fuck down will ya?!" it was Claus. He ran towards me and shoved me a bit when he caught up. I didn't acknowledge him, I was too out of it at the moment. I guess he knew that there was something bothering me because he didn't say anything to me until we were at a far enough distance from school. Claus asked, "So...How was that 'study session' with Lucas?" I wanted to explode, he knew that I had feelings for Lucas and he thought it was fucking hilarious to tease me about it. "It could've been better...uh, I fell asleep." I replied as I tried to avoid making eye contact with him. I could hear Claus trying hard not to laugh, "Are you serious? You didn't even try to give him any hints? God, you're such a wuss." I didn't know what to say back but he was right, I am a wuss. "I don't understand how it's so difficult for you to tell him how you feel, man. You've been friends with him for the longest time!" Claus exclaimed; I didn't understand either, I used to hang out with Lucas a lot back then but now it's been awkward for me to even start a conversation with him ever since I developed feelings. "Anyway now that we're almost home, you should let your mom know that you'll be staying over for the night."
"Oh, but I already told her- Wait...stay over? For the night?! I thought I was just visiting!", I shouted. I was so bewildered, I didn't plan any of this at all.
"C'mon Ness, you haven't slept over in such a long time and you live right across from us so I don't see any problems with this. Besides..." He paused and let out a little chuckle. "...you want to spend more time with my brother, am I right or am I right?" God, I wanted to punch Claus' smug face of his, I knew what was going on. He was actually doing me a favor though. So I just rolled my eyes at him and called my mom. Of course, she was alright with me staying over but a bit surprised about it since it's been so long. I hung up and we were at the front door. I was kind of nervous, I wasn't sure if I was ready. I quickly adjusted my hat and dusted off my shoulders. Claus shook his head, "You're unbelievable, dude." He unlocked the door finding that Boney was waiting for him. Claus looked around the place with Boney following him, he called for Lucas several time but no answer.
"Huh, looks like he isn't here. He probably went out to buy food." Claus said, I was pretty upset about that but kind of relieved. It gave me more time to pull myself together. "I'm gonna go walk Boney for a bit, make yourself at home and try not to steal anything...Alright?" He pat my shoulder and closed the door behind him. I looked around, their place wasn't very big but it was able to fit a family of five. It had a pretty cozy feeling to it too. I saw some family photos hung on the walls, I wasn't surprised that there was more pictures of Claus than Lucas on display. I smiled a bit at the pictures of Lucas but tried not to stare. I kept looking around, I came across their parents' room which didn't have much. Then there was a locked room with a "Do Not Enter" sign on the room with pictures of Claus wearing sunglasses surrounding it. Gee, I wonder whose room is that. Finally there was Lucas' room which was open, it was pretty clean despite the balls of paper that was surrounding the trash bin by his desk. I walked to his dresser and obliviously opened one of his drawers. Next thing I knew I was holding one of Lucas' striped shirts. I sniffed it...Fuck, Am I really doing this? Yeah, I really was. There was something about his scent that I really liked, I sniffed it more. I nuzzled it and rubbed it against my cheek, pretending I was actually doing this to Lucas. I was at bliss until I heard a voice, "Ness...?" My heart jumped and I yelled, "Ah, Clothes! I mean...Claus!" I didn't dare to turn around to see who it was. "No, it's Lucas." This was it, this was the end of me. I wanted to disappear on the spot. With a quivery voice I asked, "Wh-What are you doing here?" Lucas giggled which made me less tense, he replied "Because I live here. What are you doing here in my room...with my shirt?" I got all tense again, I tried thinking of an excuse "Uh, Claus...Your brother...h-he um, gave me your shirt and told me to put it away b-before he left to walk uh, Boney..." I quickly put his shirt back in the drawer and closed it. I stood there facing the drawer, I was too scared to turn around. It was quiet until Lucas said, "Claus told me you were staying overnight, huh? I'm not sure how that's going to work out..." I turned around to him barely making any eye contact. "We don't really have any space for anyone else like Claus never lets anyone go in his room, Boney pretty much hogs the couch...we'll figure something out." I had so much trouble speaking, I was still trying to recover from what just happened. I was really embarrassed, I hope he didn't notice that I was red and sweaty all over. More importantly, I hope he wasn't there longer than I thought he was. So much was in my mind I didn't know what to do. Not to mention, this constant silence drove me nuts.
"We should get to studying when Claus gets back, did you bring any extra clothes to change into?" Lucas finally asked, I anxiously searched my bag. "..Oh crap, I must've forgot to pack up this morning I was in a rush." I actually wasn't in a rush I was just really distracted by my own thoughts of him. Lucas went to his dresser and took out some clothes.
"You can borrow mines- Er, unless you want your mom to come by quickly to drop off some clothes." Without hesitation I took his clothes, "No! I mean, this is fine. M-My mom is probably too busy doing errands, haha." Lucas nodded and left the room. I followed him then scuttled to the bathroom to change. His clothes were sort of small on me otherwise they was comfortable to wear. I went to the living room where Lucas was waiting for me, I sat beside him. Claus was also back from his walk with Boney. He walked by us, he gave me a quick thumbs up and disappeared into his room. Lucas handed me a sheet and asked, "Do you understand any of this?" Yes, I did but I pretended I didn't just so I can hear his voice more. I shook my head and he said, "Ok, so you..." That's where I stopped focusing on any kind of school work, I only paid attention to Lucas himself. I was already getting tired of just admiring him. I wanted to cuddle him and kiss that gorgeous face of his. Though looking at him while having those nice, gay thoughts was really relaxing. I felt myself getting sleepy. I'm not sure how long it was until I blacked out... again.
What the actual fuck... I woke up on a bed that I thought that was mine for a moment but it wasn't. Where am I? How did I get here? Am I dead? I stared at the ceiling while I was sorting out all the thoughts in my head. I looked to my left, I saw an alarm clock that had a bright 3:46 on it. I looked to my right, I wasn't sure what it was but I knew there was something on the other side of the bed. My almost had a heard attack when I saw it move, then I heard a sigh. It took me a while to figure out that I was on Lucas' bed...I was sharing beds with Lucas. I felt my face heating up, I couldn't believe the situation I was in. I went back to staring at the ceiling and contemplated about everything. As badly as I wanted to, I didn't bother to cuddle him from behind or even scoot closer. I closed my eyes and sighed, it was too late for me to overthink. I tried going back to sleep but I was having a difficult time doing so.
Just when I was finally about to fall asleep I felt a sudden movement. It woke me up a bit but I chose to ignore it. There was more movement... what the hell, Lucas. I turned my head finding that he got close to me, like really close. So close that our noses were almost touching. As much as I wanted to think otherwise, I'm sure he's doing this unintentionally since he's asleep. I started falling back asleep again until I felt Lucas slowly put his arm over my chest and gently nuzzle into my neck. Holy fuck, this is a dream...this can't be actually happening. I pinched myself really hard but nothing happened. Why is this happening? What did I do to deserve this? I would be cuddling Lucas back by now but the questions kept coming in.
"Ness...?" I felt the warmth of his breath on my neck, I shivered. Not to mention, his voice sounded adorable when he's all sleepy. "Yeah?" I replied as I brought myself a little closer to him. "I'm sorry if you find this weird...", Lucas said, I hugged him to show that I was alright with this and I didn't find this weird at all. "I wanted to do this for such a long time, I couldn't help myself." Are you fucking serious. I couldn't believe what he was saying, so I said, "Lucas, it's 4 in the morning...I'm not even sure if you're being serious or not." I felt like an asshole saying that but I wanted to make sure. Lucas sharply inhaled and said, "I'm serious. I...I love you, Ness." He nuzzled into my chest to hide his face. I felt my heart was beating so fast, I was so happy. I embraced him tightly, "I love you too, Lucas"