We Play Well Together

Or, Chakotay Gets Trapped in the Fortress of Doom with Queen Arachnia. Because who doesn't want to see Chakotay's reaction to that dress?

All rights to Paramount for Voyager, and I suppose to Tom Paris for Captain Proton.

=/\=

Static buzzing.

I awoke to a particularly violent throb on the back of my skull and the memory of being hit with something blunt and weighty. I opened my eyes through a series of squinted blinks, and the world came back into a fuzzy black-and-white focus. Confused, I shook my head ever so gingerly, finding my hands oddly unavailable, and used my left shoulder to rub at my eye. The world was still monochrome. And then I recalled what had hit me – a hologram.

My head cleared and I looked around, taking in the tall and cavernous interior of what had to be the infamous Fortress of Doom. Dimly, I thought it odd that my love of archaeology and Tom Paris' love of 20th century American society didn't go together. He adored this program. It was my current goal in life to avoid it. But passing by while Paris was cursing and tinkering with the holodeck controls had prompted me to ask what he was doing. Fifteen seconds later I was following him into the holodeck to double-check some of the power relays. And then – wham! So much for goals.

Having surveyed the bizarre throne room – it had to be, there was a throne to my right – I looked to the left and found Tom Paris slumped from another pillar. His hands were on either side of his ears, floating and cuffed, with the chain stretching around and behind his neck. Experimentally, I moved my arms to see how much allowance my own bonds had. Close to zero.

"Tom," I snapped, kicking lightly at the ensign's leg. "Tom, wake up."

The younger man came around with a small moan, automatically finding his footing and stretching his neck to the side. He blinked at the scene around him. "Oh man…we got captured."

"You've got that right. What the hell is going on?" The sooner we could get out of here, the better.

"We're in Chaotica's Fortress of Doom, in the main throne room." He craned his head around. "Odd, we seem to be alone."

"Good. Lets see if we can end this here and now," I said, desperately hoping to end the madness quickly. "Computer, end program."

"Unable to comply."

"Command override Chakotay Beta One Zero Five."

"Unable to comply. Command override failed."

I glared at the ceiling in disbelief.

Paris gave it a go. "Computer, why can't the program be ended?"

"An unknown error has occurred in the secondary power systems. All secondary power systems on this deck are offline."

He sighed. "It looks like we'll have to get out of this the old fashioned way, commander."

I wasn't quite ready to give up, though. "Chakotay to the bridge."

A moment later, Janeway's voice echoed around the throne room and for half a second my hope buoyed up with the sound. "Go ahead, commander."

"Captain, Paris and I are - " I paused, considering, "Stuck…in Holodeck 2."

I could hear Janeway's bemused grin through the comm line as she no doubt checked which program was running. "Sorry, commander. The secondary power systems blew out and it's going to take a while to bring them back online."

I reigned in my disappointment. "Understood."

She chuckled. "Chakotay, Tom? Have fun, but not too much, all right?"

Paris grinned. "Aye, captain."

The comm link went dead and we looked at each other for a few seconds. I really, really didn't want to play my way out of Captain Proton, despite the fact that several months ago I was barely containing my glee at having to send Janeway into the program. I have no doubt she thoroughly enjoyed it even though she never talked about it again. I still wonder about her costume, because she dodged every question about it, but Paris and Kim had cracked smiles and turned delicate shades of red when others asked. No bites, though.

"All right," I said finally, "tell me what's going on here."

Paris nodded. "Chapter 24: The Battle for Earth. Captain Proton has been received a distress signal from Planet X, one that looks like it's from a stranded earthling. When he comes to investigate, he finds that Chaotica has tricked him into leaving earth unprotected. Not only that, but Chaotica has convinced Queen Arachnia to join him in fighting against earth now that he has Proton captured."

I could feel my brain shutting down. Then it jolted back into motion. "Arachnia?"

"Uh – yeah. Captain Janeway said we could make a hologram and use her image instead of the standard Arachnia in the database." He swallowed, looking a bit sheepish. No doubt he recalled myself and several other crewmembers hanging around him in the mess hall, trying to get details about what had gone on in the holodeck. I hadn't pressed too hard, not wanting to appear unprofessional, but I had listened curiously all the same.

Still, this was news to me. "She did?"

"Yeah. I…I think she liked the program more than she let on." Clearly wrong-footed, Paris tried to steer the conversation back to the storyline. "Anyway, Proton is trapped – obviously – and it looks like Chaotica is going to win. Except, Arachnia doesn't like the idea of him being supreme ruler of the cosmos, so at the last minute, she sabotages him by helping Proton escape."

I sighed. "At least the good guys win. So we just wait around here until…Arachnia comes to help us?"

Paris nodded, glancing towards the tall doors. Footsteps were approaching. "Well, we can't really go anywhere. But remember, it's all about grand gestures and intrigue in this story, so we have to keep the villains talking. We have to convince Arachnia to help us, and she's not easily swayed by Proton."

"I see," I said dryly.

This time Pairs blushed. "Well…lets just say that Queen Arachnia has two interests: power and domination. She likes to be top dog, and Chaotica doesn't understand that. We do."

"We?"

"Uh, yeah. Captain Proton and Buster Kincaid are the good guys, so, naturally we know her motivations."

"It doesn't hurt that you know how Captain Janeway programed Arachnia."

"No," he admitted.

I fished around for more information. "Does that make me Kincaid, Captain?"

Tom shook his head. "They won't recognize you. We'll have to make something up as we go along."

At that moment, the tall doors the throne room slid open and a man with a ridiculously large helmet ("that's Lumzack") strode in, stepped dramatically to the side, and bowed pretentiously. "Bow, cowards, before his majesty, Chaotica, and her highness, Queen Arachnia!"

The Chaotica hologram marched in, clad in long robes, simpering visibly at the dark lithe woman on his arm, who must be Arachnia. Chaotica turned toward us, the woman following, and I got my first look at Queen Arachnia.

My jaw actually dropped. Knowing before-hand that Arachnia looked like Kathryn Janeway, and knowing that Arachnia was not Kathryn Janeway did absolutely nothing to help the sudden dip in my stomach or my baffled staring.

That face.

That hair.

That dress.

Hell, that slit.

No wonder Tom and Harry had been so close-lipped about the entire episode. One good glare from Queen Arachnia was enough to bring a man to his knees. I felt mine buckle.

"Ah, Captain Proton," Chaotica roared, gliding to us, Arachnia still on his arm. "You see, my dear, the pitiful earthling is no match for my cunning plan."

He was all but preening, clearly astonished by her proximity, and prepared to stake all his claims on nothings to keep her there.

I held my tongue – I didn't trust myself to speak yet, if I was honest – and waited for Tom to take the lead. He only shrugged though, possibly waiting to gauge Arachnia's mood. I looked away from Tom and my stomach dipped as Arachnia uncoiled herself from Chaotica's arm and slid towards me.

"I see," she all but purred, and I'm pretty sure I made a sound like I was choking.

It's not Kathryn, I reminded myself firmly. NOT Kathryn.

She glanced towards Tom. "Of course, the distress beacon was my idea," she reminded Chaotica, her voice velvet frost. That was a voice that I knew not to trust. That was a voice that sent me running for cover.

She settled herself firmly in front of me, barely a foot between us. When she spoke, it was Tom she addressed. "If you're Proton, who is this?" Her face tipped, and I gritted my teeth. "He's not your usual…sidekick."

Chaotica tossed his arm nonchalantly. "It hardly matters, my Queen. It is an earthling, one that I have captured."

I felt an explosion somewhere in the region of my abdomen as Arachnia reached her small hand – which was far too familiar – up to my face and drew one of her long nails gently down my cheek.

Tom stepped in then. "He's one of the commanders of my star fleet," he snapped.

This distracted her.

"That's right," he barreled on, "I've got an entire fleet of spaceships waiting out there. Buster Kincaid is on one of them, ready to radio earth the moment he hears from me. Earth knows about the attack, Chaotica, it will never work."

"Aaaah!" Chaotica man roared, a fist clutched dramatically in the air. "Lumzak!"

The man bumbled forward, bowing. "Yes, my liege?"

"Scan the area for Proton's alleged star fleet."

"At once, highness!"

Arachnia, however, seemed much less impressed. "Surely a fleet of ships could not go undetected by you, your highness?" she asked, her voice hitting that dangerous mixture of vacancy and iciness. Another tone that sent me running from the ready room. I was going to kill her for this.

"Of course not, your highness," Tom ventured. "Chaotica has simply overlooked the possibility that someone could outwit him." He glared pointedly at the villainous man. "Despite the fact that he's constantly being outwitted."

Arachnia raised a brow delicately and turned back to look me in the eye. "And what do you have to say to all of this, commander?"

For some obscure reason, her eyes – even in monochrome – were safe. They were eyes that I could look into and find the right words. "Only that you should think very carefully about who your allies are," I said evenly.

Tom must have been impressed, because his eyebrows reached for his hairline.

"Your highness! We do not detect any spaceships. Captain Proton is lying," Lumzak announced from across the room.

"Ah-hah!" Chaotica trumped, stepping up towards Proton and laying a hand on Arachnia's arm. "A foolish attempt to thwart my plan. Earth has no idea we are coming, my sweet."

But Arachnia didn't move, and she didn't break eye contact. Her face was sliding slowly – but irrevocably – into that soft, quietly vulnerable, Chakotay-what-do-I-do-now expression. And I could answer that. "They're cloaked," I told her smoothly. "You won't be able to detect them until they're disintegrating this fortress around you." Talking with Arachnia was as natural as talking to Kathryn. "Your majesty, if I were you, I would leave now."

It was hard to tell which of us was more captivated. All it took was Kathryn's face in front of me, and I would apparently slip easily into any role she needed me to play, and I could play it with the same mastery and artistry that I use everyday dancing between my roles as first officer and best friend. And as for Arachnia, I wasn't quite sure what made her tick. I was reasonably sure that an automatic response to me was not programmed into her, but something about her was Kathryn Janeway, and she kept that same intimate distance from me that her creator did. Unlike her creator though, Arachnia's eyes were curiously roaming and lingering on my features.

Our chemistry was bizarre and, frankly, potent. And it was too much for Chaotica's jealous nature to endure. He seized Arachnia by the waist and swirled her around into his arms, a hand coming to rest on her cheek. "My Queen," he whispered seductively, "come with me. We will ready the Death Ray and prepare to destroy planet earth."

I was amused to see that I knew Arachnia better than Chaotica did. It was with irritation and condescension that she followed him across the chamber to the machinery. Chaotica was about to lose her.

At that moment, Tom let out a low whistle, startling me from the bubble that had been encasing me. "Forget Captain Proton," he said with feeling, "It's Commander Chakotay who's going to save planet earth."

"This is the last time I step foot on the holodeck with you, unless I know we're going to Sandrine's." It was weak, but it was the first thing that came to mind. I took a deep breath. At least I wasn't blushing.

But Tom only shrugged. "I'm just giving you a compliment, sir. Arachnia isn't easy to win over, but you've got her wrapped around your finger."

I tried to hide the grin that twitched at my jaw. I've had a lot of practice with Arachnia's doppelganger, and I know those eyes well. Too well, some would say, but, I suspect, not our crew. I cast around for a way to reroute the conversation. "What did Arachnia originally look like?

"She was a really tall woman with blonde hair and a bit of a, uh, well – she was created in the 1930s, so she was a bit easier for Chaotica to win over, I suppose. The writers in that century believed that women should be subordinate to men, even the villains. Captain Janeway definitely made her more dangerous," he grinned.

That was for sure. Still, I was surprised. "She helped you with the hologram?"

Tom laughed quietly. "I was pretty shocked, but a couple weeks after that whole incident with the photonic life-forms, she came up to me with a padd and said that she had read up on all the Captain Proton stories, and she had a few tweaks that I needed to make to Arachnia. That was her deal – I alter the Arachnia character to suit her, and she let us keep Arachnia looking like her."

Slowly, I shook my head in disbelief, moving my sore arms and hearing the chain rake behind my neck. "She never mentioned that to me." I felt a bit shunned, to be honest. I know she doesn't tell me everything, and I wouldn't want her to. But something that she had fun with? I would have loved to hear about it, and I would have loved the subsequent teasing even more.

"I don't think she wanted anyone to know, honestly. She told me to keep it quiet. So just you and Harry know."

"I guess she liked the program more than we all thought."

"I guess so."

We passed a few minutes in silence, and I found myself glued to the image of Arachnia, hovering in Chaotica's periphery as he worked on the Death Ray. For a few scant seconds, she had remained faithfully beside him, allowing his caresses, his boasts, his ego. And then, with distinct Kathryn Janeway-ness, she glided further and further away from him as he became more engrossed in his work. Another similarity – no patience for the chimera of empty men.

With a decisive turn, she spun on her heel – taller than Kathryn's boots – and strode back to us. Well, to me.

"Cloaked ships?" she demanded, completely ignoring Tom.

I was amused. "That's right."

She smiled coyly. "That's either a very good bluff or a very impressive tactical maneuver, commander," she said huskily.

The smile and low voice hit me where it counted. "Thanks," was all I could manage, but I said it with a smile. I'm good at masking this particular emotion.

Arachnia glanced at Tom. "And when are they scheduled to arrive?"

"Oh, I'd say give or take fifteen minutes, now. You should decide whether or not you want to leave, your majesty."

Her jaw raised, and I watched its progress. Another trait from Kathryn. Jaw goes up, hands to hips, weight into her upper back, and everybody run. "I suppose that means you want me to release you," she whispered dangerously.

"There's something in it for you," Tom said. I felt this was a ridiculous thing to tell her, but maybe the characters were all programed to negotiate. Still, I felt like Arachnia was as non-negotiable as Kathryn.

"And what would that be?"

"We'd owe you," he said urgently. "The commander and I. Next time you need something, you can call on us."

The hell this woman needed anything from anybody.

Her eyebrows rose haughtily. "I don't need anything from you," she snarled. I unsuccessfully smothered a laugh.

Tom backpedaled. "Of course you don't. But you might…want something."

Want something? And what the hell was she even supposed to want from anyone? Except maybe absolute obedience?

Her knuckle was caressing the side of my face before I could even think of a way to help Tom out of that one. And her eyes – dammit – were locked with mine again. "You know," she whispered low, "I've got my own fleet of spaceships, commander. I might be able to use a good man like you." Her other hand found my chest, and the familiarity of the touch combined with the newness of her hand on my face nearly knocked me over. And her voice…that should be illegal, I told myself as I firmly set my jaw.

She wasn't done yet. Apparently Arachnia was seduction in high heels, because she was now tracing the outline of my combadge. "Brave. Cunning." Her breath was tickling my cheek. "What would you say to something like that?"

Not Kathryn, not Kathryn.

I nearly saw stars as her fingertips brushed over my lips. I'm not sure how I got the next words out. "I'd say help us escape and I'll think about it."

Her hand glided up from my chest to curl behind my neck, and she smiled wickedly. "Diplomatic, too. I think I might consider helping you and Proton just to have that conversation, commander." And I knew I was utterly doomed as I felt her fingers spread wide and push my neck forward, claiming my mouth in a deep and decisive kiss.

I promise, I did try to pull away. But Arachnia was a hologram, and by default stronger than me. Or was she supposed to be? Was that Kathryn's doing too? My mind spun out, worrying about the fact that Tom Paris was watching this, and that I was never, ever going to live this down. Kathryn was going to hear about it too, and it could quite possibly utterly ruin our friendship.

But her mouth was insistent, her arms impossibly strong, I truly could not move, and I slipped. I surrendered. I let Queen Arachnia fully enjoy the spoils of her victory. And for just a few seconds, the two of us were a small, uncontained explosion.

The next thing my drowning brain knew, Arachnia's mouth was against my ear. "I think Chaotica has had enough fun for one day," she purred. And she swept away, the mistress of poise and control, ostensibly to sabotage the Death Ray.

I swallowed hard. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Tom Paris staring hard at the floor. "Tom, I swear, if you ever-"

His face spun towards me. "No sir. Never." And he actually looked sincere.

"Good," was all I could say.

Before I could founder in further, a youthful voice filled the room. "Kincaid to Captain Proton. Proton, do you copy?"

I silently determined to slip Harry Kim a few extra replicator rations in reward for rescuing me from such a decidedly awkward situation.

"Loud and clear," Tom answered. The villains were all looking skyward as if they could see the voice's owner. "What's the status of our fleet of spaceships? Are they cloaked and in position?"

Harry didn't miss a beat. "Absolutely. We're standing ready now."

"Arm the Destructo Beam, Buster. I'll take out the Death Ray and the Lightening Shield in just a second."

Tom shot Arachnia a meaningful look, and she sidestepped an astounded Lumzak and leveled a blast from a ray gun at the machinery.

"Nooo!" Chaotica wailed. "Arachnia, you have jilted me again, my love!"

Arachnia cackled madly - that certainly wasn't Kathryn - and fired the ray gun at her would-be lover, watching him sink dramatically to the floor. Lumzak and the guards panicked and rushed from the room, shouting in chaos.

In the silence that followed, Arachnia swiveled around and found my eyes again. My stomach swooped a bit lower still as she casually leaned back on her right hip and tossed the ray gun aside. I bit my tongue when she sauntered over, stopping dead in front of me again.

"Thanks," Tom managed.

Dammit if the right words didn't come out again. It had to be her eyes – too many years of reading them until I memorized every nuance. We play well together. "That was a wise decision," I told her quietly.

Arachnia stepped right into me again, every tacit message from my eyes to my cuffed hands silently inviting her in the way only Kathryn would recognize. But one, I reminded myself, that she never responded to. Arachnia was dangerous though, and she twisted her arms around my neck and landed a light kiss on my jaw. "What do you saw to my offer?" she murmured.

We play well together. "I said I'd think about it," I reminded her. "I'm still thinking."

Her lips on mine again, damn. "Is there another woman?" she asked enticingly, her voice low.

I couldn't help the wry smile that found my face. "Not exactly."

"Then there is absolutely nothing for you to be coy about," Arachnia said huskily, her mouth against my ear.

"Back off." Captain Janeway's voice cracked through the room like a whip.

I shifted as best as I could, startled, to find Kathryn standing alone a few meters away, looking decidedly dangerous.

As if understanding that this was a voice she could not refuse, Arachnia slipped off me and stepped towards her double. I watched the appraising look they gave one another. Finally, Arachnia asked, "He's yours?"

Kathryn took a couple of steps forward, the swing in her arms displaying her confidence. "In a manner of speaking."

I think my head went through the roof at those words.

Arachnia looked back to me. "So there is another woman. It's a pity. Still," she reached out and stroked my cheek longingly and I felt it burn hot, "at least you have good taste." She didn't look away, but addressed Janeway. "The Fortress has fallen?"

"Yes."

Arachnia nodded. "Truly disappointing. I will return to Arachnos then. Alone, sadly." The word 'alone' kicked me into all kinds of protest, but I forced all of my words to lie back down in their graves. She stood on tiptoe and kissed my tattoo. "Truly a pity, commander," she whispered so that only I could hear.

And then she swept away and was marching past Janeway, her words now loud enough for the entire room to hear. "To return home with a man like that would have been a prize indeed."

When she left the hall, the silence was almost deafening.

"Captain!" Tom called with a bit too much enthusiasm. "I'm glad you showed up."

Janeway gave us both a crooked smile as she approached, holding up a key. "I pulled this off of Lumzak," she informed us, unlocking Tom's cuffs.

"He should be more careful about his keys," he said, rubbing his wrists.

"He really should. Tom, Harry is waiting out on the drawbridge. Why don't you join him and get back to the bridge, hmm? We'll be right behind you."

"Yes ma'am," Tom said gratefully, and fled the throne room.

Quickly, I tossed the entire experience with Arachnia into a box and closed it, determined not to think about it until later.

Janeway watched Tom flee and suppressed a laugh. "Tom Paris running for his life." She grinned at me. "Not something you see every day."

I smiled back automatically, naturally, and shook my head. "No."

Her grin turned to a full-fledged smile. "Neither is seeing you trussed up like that."

We play well together. "Are you going to let me out?"

She shrugged noncommittally. "Have fun?"

I shrugged too. "Maybe."

"What do you think of Arachnia?"

I looked blatantly at the key in her hand, letting her know that keeping me here, asking me questions like this, was very dangerous. "Decidedly more vampish than you."

I knew she had gotten the message. But for some reason, she chose to ignore it. Kathryn chuckled and slid up to me just like Arachnia had, winding her arms around my neck and smiling. "Relatively speaking, I suppose."

The lid popped off the box like a lid on a boiling kettle. Kathryn Janeway, you are playing with fire right now.

But I responded appropriately. "Relatively speaking."

Someone must have spiked her coffee, because her finger began slowly tracing my mouth.

"You have lipstick on your face, commander," she told me in a decently passable imitation of Arachnia purring.

"Do I?"

"You're not usually so sloppy in your appearance."

"Sorry," was all I could manage.

"It's a good color on you," she said with a smile, and I felt her knee leaning against my leg. She was being very careful to cross just enough lines to work me up, I could tell. I didn't answer her.

Kathryn's finger traced around my lips, over every centimeter of where Arachnia's lipstick stained her victory onto my skin. Her voice was quiet and husky when she spoke again. "Does this mean there's another woman, commander?"

I stared at her, openly stared at her. My mind was blank, then full, and then, "You made her, Kathryn."

"You surrendered," she shot back. Her eyes dropped to my mouth, then back to my eyes. "An uncanny likeness she and I have," she said quietly. She let it linger in the air for a moment, taking all the blame, the responsibility for Arachnia's actions, and winding it into a suggestive thought that sat on my back. Maybe…maybe Fair Haven wasn't the only holodeck program that Kathryn Janeway used to toy with me.

I was certain of this when she stood on tiptoe and leaned against me, undoing the lock on my cuffs. And then she didn't really move afterwards, but just stood there with her boots against mine, waiting to see what I would do. I wasn't really sure what I should do, but I responded naturally to the silent invitations she offered, just as Arachnia had to mine.

"I heard Tom tell the Doctor something once. He said 'what happens on the holodeck, stays on the holodeck.'"

The smallest quirk entered her smile. "Common knowledge," she countered.

"Common practice," I said, and took her small face into my hands. Standing so close? She was asking for it. And the kiss that came after was anything but common practice between us, but the theoretical knowledge that I have of Kathryn and that Kathryn has of me was more than enough to push the boundaries, satisfy desires, and block out any errant thought that Queen Arachnia was more dangerous than Kathryn Janeway.

This face.

This hand.

This mouth.

Hell, this woman.