Pairings: Ichigo x Orihime and sorta Ulquiorra x Orihime

Timeline: canon timeline, many MANY years after the ending of Bleach

Warnings: idk perhaps someone getting butthurt?

Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach

Authors Note: gotta love me that hypothetical angst provided by me, for the people

Ever since Ichigo passed away, Orihime always found night the worst part of her day. During daylight hours she could pass the time with her grandchildren, she could bake, she enjoyed gardening now more so than ever and spending time with her friends (human or otherwise) were options she had. At night, however, when the Kurosaki Clinic was empty save for Orihime, she was almost always overcome with loneliness.

Sinking into a chair near the window in their bedroom, the seed of loneliness sprouted, throwing Orihime back decades to when she lived alone in her brother's apartment. She tugged a little at the gold band on her finger, struggling a little to pull the delicate band off her finger. Orihime normally didn't take her wedding ring off – unless she was baking – but at times when the loneliness grasped her like a vice, she could really use some encouragement from the inscription on the band.

It had come as a complete surprise to Orihime on their wedding day when she got a final look at her ring and the inscription was written in Ichigo's messy scrawl. Nothing more than a simple I'll love you forever, Orihime, but it was enough to send the already blubbering woman into flurry of snot and Ghibli tears. She held the ring in her hand, feeling the onslaught of impending tears well in her pretty grey eyes and she pressed the ring against her lips before sliding it back on her finger.

She missed Ichigo more than anything and if it weren't for Kazui, she didn't know how she would have continued on living after his death. Ichigo saved her from more than just danger and she didn't think their years together would ever be enough to repay him. She loved him and always would love him.

And yet, sometimes, during nights like this, Orihime's mind would drift off to the past, to reminisce in the constant adventure from their teen years. From the best of times to the times that haunted her nightmares, she would remember them all. Rubbing her thumb over her wrinkled hand, she was dragged back to the moment in Hueco Mundo that she would likely never forget. The moment in time that she wished – at least some part of her – she could go back to try and do something to save Ulquiorra's life. Deep in her heart, Orihime believed that if Ulquiorra had lived, he would have changed.

He already had when he reached for her hand.

Maybe things would have been different then, maybe Ulquiorra would have helped them defeat Aizen and come back with them. Maybe he would have stayed in Hueco Mundo as a neutral party but came back to lend his aid against Yhwach like Grimmjow and Nel had. Maybe he would have tried to kill them again. Maybe he would have been stripped of his powers and given a second chance as a human. Maybe… maybe Orihime would have eventually fallen in love with him.

Because, if Ulquiorra had lived, perhaps that was enough of a variable in itself to change everything about Orihime's future. Maybe Ichigo would have married Rukia, or maybe they would have ended up all alone.

However… as these intrusive thoughts endeavoured to sneak up on Orihime and drown her in the hypothetical, the wonderful life Ichigo gave her seeped in, sweeping away the 'what if' to remind her of what she would have had to give up. There is nothing in this world that Orihime would do to rewind the clock and potentially lose everything she loved. No she wouldn't do that.

Laughing a little at her foolish thoughts, Orihime sighed a little wistfully. "No… no I would never trade this life for a different one if I could." She didn't want a do over, a life without Ichigo and Kazui is one Orihime rejected whole-heartedly, but the ever-present thoughts of 'what if' would unfortunately be a prevalent whisper during the quiet hours of night.

Touching her chest with another soft laugh, she dredged up the sorrowful look in Ulquiorra's beautiful eyes and the feeling of being at a complete and utter loss when she felt when she reached for him and his fingers turned to ash at her touch. The ache in her chest when she desperately stretched for him, hoping to catch hold of something substantial and tangible but she got absolutely nothing.

Glancing out the window, seeing the stars splattered in the night sky, sparkling like diamonds and crystals, Orihime smiled with a crinkle to her eyes and let her hand fall against her lap. "But… maybe in a different life I could have taken your hand."

Leisurely pushing herself out of her chair, Orihime got ready for bed, letting her mind push away the meddling thoughts of the past she couldn't and wouldn't change, before she climbed into bed and plucked the portrait of Ichigo off her night table. Pressing a warm kiss against the glass, Orihime closed her eyes, hugging the frame to her chest, prepared to fall into the sweet caress of her dreams. To Ichigo's strong arms and gentle kisses – a dream so intoxicating that sometimes Orihime eagerly awaited sleep so she could return to the fantasy.

Yup, she loved him more than anything and to Orihime, she would gladly live this life again if she could spend it with Ichigo.

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I hope you enjoyed (๑・ω-)～ "

~Emerald~