Ok then, this is my first attempt at a FF Fic, please review on it about improvements etc.

I also don't own Final Fantasy VII, regardless of how much it hurts to say it.

A full list of pairings:

Yuffie-Vincent

Cid-Shera

Cloud-Tifa

Barret-Myrna (His wife who died in corral)

Cait Sith-Vending Machine (??)

Chapter 1: The amazing art of ignoring Ninjas Main Characters: Vincent, Yuffie, Cid,

"Vince, do you mind if I call you that?"

"..."

"Please?"

"..."

"Pwetty Pwease?"

"... Yes"

"You don't YAY!"

"Yes I do mind"

The boat rumbled over the river on the wild goose chase Reeve had sent them on; Yuffie hadn't really listened to the briefing.

"Hey Vinnie, what're we doing?" She enquired, trying not to look too stupid

"... Didn't you listen to Reeve?" he answered

"Ummm... Yes..." she replied, twirling a lock of her brown hair between her fingers.

"... What point did you give up listening?" He said

"Why I never! To insinuate such a thing! Vincent Valentine you ju-"Yuffie began, but stopped as Vincent clamped a hand on her mouth, sealing it shut.

"We are going to investigate a submarine that was launched from Midgar before the Meteor incident; it crashed into the northern continent."

Yuffie mouthed speechlessly

"Y-You can say more than four words at one time!?" Yuffie screamed

"..." Vincent replied

"So, a crashed submarine, eh? Sounds fun!" Yuffie said, jumping on the spot and doing a cartwheel along the side of the ship, Vincent was too busy paying attention to a letter which he always seemed to be carrying in one of his pockets; Yuffie had once earned a week of Vincent ignoring her when she tried to steal it from him.

"Shouldn't you be succumbing to Motion Sickness by now?" Vincent enquired

"Urk... don't remind me, the second I start thinking about i-"her words were cut off as she dashed for the side of the ship, gagging as she ran and vomited over the railings. They arrived at the new port of Bone Village, although the name was hardly fitting now, as it had grown to be about half the size of Midgar used to be. When they got off, Vincent carrying Yuffie as she had passed out through dehydration (Motion Sickness leaves little time for drinking), they booked a room in one of the new hotels that had sprung up in the area, and went to the room.

Itscidtimeyay!

Cid Highwind, designer and pilot of The Highwind, and the new Highwind Mk. 2 took a break from editing the new Shera airship he was making, drinking a thermos of tea, and routinely cussing about the "Inertial dampers being set to low for the polydrolic compensators to work" and a number of other things, including Shera's stubbornness about him spending too much time with his new airship, "IT'S SOMETHING FOR ME TO DO!" he had yelled, (Or words to that effect, there was definitely more cussing involved), before storming out. That had been three weeks ago, and now he was staying in his new bedroom in the Highwind II and dividing his time between building the Shera, and modifying the Highwind II.

"CI-ID!" a voice cried out, making him leap out of his chair, and smash his head on an engine turbine

"S&T!" He yelled, rubbing the bruise on his head, and wondering who had called him. He turned around, and saw Tifa proceeding up the drive, he also noticed that the stupid whiney pain-in-the as he liked to call him, or Cloud to the rest, had stayed behind

"Guess what day it is today Cid?" Tifa enquired, panting slightly from the long walk.

"Tuesday?" he guessed, confused as to all the attraction

"No silly! It's February the 22nd!" Tifa said, as she reached behind her to get a bag from the numerous ones strapped to her back.

"Yeah? So?" Cid said, wondering why this day was so special.

"IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAY!!" Tifa yelled at him, by now Cloud had come up and handed Tifa the rest of her bags.

"I can't help anyone, I'm a failure" Cloud moaned,

"What the F£s his problem!?" Cid shouted pointing at Cloud.

"He's gone in for the whole I-can't-help-anyone scene, so that's all he seems to say" Tifa responded, patting Cloud on the back.

"Why don't ya try saying annoying catchphrases until he gets angry rather than sad?" Cid said, lighting up a cigarette.

"Like what?" Tifa asked, looking at Cid enquiringly.

"Like, I dunno "Silly little you"? Or perhaps "Dilly-Dally Shilly-Shally"?" Cid said, thinking of others.

"Dilly-Dally Shilly-Shally" Tifa repeated under her breath.

"Thanks Cid!" she said before kissing him on the cheek and going to see how Shera was doing.

"What the F(£ have I unleashed!?" Cid pondered aloud, as he walked to the house where he lived. As he opened the door he got an unusual aroma of... pinkness.

"Shera?" He said, waiting for a reply

"Yes Honey-bunny?" Shera said, carrying in a tray of teacups

"WHAT THE F(£& HAVE YOU DONE TO MY HOUSE!?"