Lover's Remorse

Bella sat on the shore and waited for Jacob, the sun was shining bright in the mid afternoon sky.

That morning when she woke the sun was so bright and beautiful that she'd decided to spend the afternoon at the beach with Jacob after she finished her chores.

She had set out some blankets for them to sit on but she really knew Jake would probably sleep most of the afternoon. She came prepared this time; she brought "Wuthering Heights" and was looking forward to rereading it yet again.

She looked out at the violent waves and remembered the darkness that Edward had left her in when he left. She was really grateful to have Jake to look forward to. But Edwards incessant lecturing in her ear every time she endangered her life was also like a drug that she couldn't get enough of.Edwards's voice had woken her from her sleepwalking state. Even when she felt she'd gone too far and she could actually lose her life, she took solace in the fact that she would hear his voice.

Bella looked towards Billy's house and saw Jake coming. She laughed when he clumsily hit his head on the porch of the small shackShe turned to watch the wave's crash on the shore. When she looked up Jake was running up to her in his wolf state. He looked so funny with the jeans tied to his hind leg.

He went into the trees and changed into his pants.When he walked back towards her Bella couldn't take her eyes away from his chest and abs. Jake noticed and started to flex. A few moments later they were both laughing uncontrollably and hugging each other. Jake lowered his face and snuck a kiss but Bella pushed him away as hard as she could. He dropped in the sand laughing harder than he had before.Just as Bella had assumed, Jake was out like a light moments later. Bella sat down beside him and put her head on his chest.

While she sat there so close to her Jake she heard Edward's voice in her mind asking what the hell she was doing with this dog, but Bella knew it was only her imagination.

She dozed off reading her book. When she opened her eyes she saw Jake standing at the tree line motioning for her to come. She followed him into the trees and she was suddenly in Edward's clearing. It seemed weird to see Edwards clearing so near Jake's beach. In the middle of the clearing was a bed and on the posters and the wrought iron head board blooming rose vines weaved in and out

Bella felt very excited to be here. She walked up to the bed and threw herself on it. Jake stood on the other side of the bed watching her with lust in his eyes. His shirt was still off and now his body was glistening in the sunlight. He sat on the bed beside her and placed his hands on her lap.

Bella turned into him. He smelled so good, just like the roses that were winding in and out of the wrought iron headboard. She snuggled into his chest and he lowered his faced and kissed her softly on her cheek. Bella figured that there was no problem kissing him back since she knew this was a dream. She turned into him surprising him and kissed his lips. Jake took her face in his hands and licked her lips. Bella felt a fire within her at that moment and kissed him back.

Jake turned around and looked into the trees half expecting someone to break through. When no one came he turned back to Bella. She was now lying on her back looking at himJake looked into her eyes while he caressed her face. He kissed her cheeks and then moved on to her neck. His lips were so warm. Bella loved the way it felt. She was still a virgin and she imagined how it would feel to have Jake inside of her. Jake went to kiss her cheek again and she turned and kissed him on the lips. He was really surprised that she'd done this and went back for more. She opened her mouth as he kissed her and he slipped his tongue into her mouth. They kissed passionately for a very long time.Heoccasionally broke away and nibbled on her lips.

Bella turned him over and straddled him. He looked up at her surprised and sat up against the headboard. He didn't mind that the rose thorns were getting tangled in his hair, he was happy to have her in his arms. Bella could feel his manhood between her legs, but she wasn't quite ready to take that step dream or not

Jake put his hands on her waist and slipped them up her shirt. He felt her beautiful breasts and regardless of the heat she started to shiver andgot goose bumps all over. Jake loved that he could make her shiver, this made her ripe for the taking. He lifted her shirt over her head and she looked at him drunk with desire. This just turned him on even more and he placed his lips on her nipples.

Bella felt like there was someone watching them and she looked into the trees but there was nothing there. She was brought back to her delicious dream when Jake bit her nipple. She took his hair into her hands and pulled his face back again she kissed him passionately and as she did so she rocked back and forth. She could feel him between her legs and she felt the passion wash over her like water.

Jake was warm and his lips were delicious but Bella found herself wanting Edwards sweep lips.

She couldn't shake the feeling that they were being watched and she turned towards the trees again. She was expecting not to see anything again but there was a shiny figure standing just within the cover of the trees.

Bella got up and put her shirt back on. She started walking back towards the tree line trying not to lose the figure in the trees. It started to circle around the clearing and she followed him, each step taking her closer to the tree line. Bella's heart was beating hard and she didn't know what was happening. When she reached the tree line Jake was behind her.

Jake took her hand and told her that they shouldn't be there. She didn't want to listen to what he had to say and forced him away from her.

She turned back towards the tree line and when she crossed over she was in the clearing from that dreaded day when she'd met James. The rain was falling hard and the thunder was real this time, there was lightning off in the distance, it looked like it was touching down on the mountain peaks.

Bella looked around not knowing what to expect but when she turned to where Edward had tried to hide her she saw James standing there. His eyes were red and filled with hatred. He walked towards her deliberately licking his lips.

"So Bella, where is your protector now? Did you run him off, where you too humanly clingy for him?"

Bella started backing up and tripped on an exposed root. James was standing over her now. "Tell me Bella, I want to know, did you run him off? If you would have just allowed it I would have made you my muse."

Bella looked at him she hated this dirty filthy creature and he knew it.

"You ran and I found you, but he came and rescued you. He can't rescue you now." He told her as he came closer to her.

Bella struggled to stand up but the mud was extremely slippery and the rain continued to fall. She closed her eyes when she opened them she expected to see James standing over her again, but there was no one there. She was lying in the woods close to her house where Edward had left her broken and alone. She stood up and started walking towards her house; the rain was still falling hard and breaking through the cover of the leaves. She saw light at the end of the trail in the woods and she began to run stumbling and falling into the mud again as she did so. When she finally reached the clearing it was extremely bright and she couldn't see anything but she felt the urge to break through.

When Bella eyes adjusted to the light she noticed she was standing in a dark alley. The men who had tried to harm her that long ago night were standing in the middle of the street and her heart began to race. She wondered if James was right, if this time Edward was not there to defend her and she'd foolishly left Jake at the clearing. She was beginning to wonder how much of this was actually a dream and she didn't like it.

At the end of the block she could see a dark figure leaning against a silver car. She felt her heart skip a beat in her chest because she thought it had to be Edward. The men started to walk towards her and she looked from them to the dark stranger but he wasn't moving.

When they finally were a few steps from her she looked over to the dark stranger and noticed he'd gotten into his car and was driving towards her. The men were now surrounding her and laughing as they whistled and snapped at her with their teeth. She noticed they had sharp vampire teeth and their eyes were red. She saw James standing across the street watching them and it looked like he was waiting for them to take her to him. Bella stood very still and braced herself for what was coming; she closed her eyes and just gave into the fear.

She started screaming and shaking uncontrollably but nothing was happening, she didn't hear them snapping anymore and she felt warm and dry again. Bella opened her eyes and she was lying on the bed in Edwards clearing again. Jake was gone and James was gone too. She looked around catching her breath and trying to calm herself.

At the end of the clearing she saw Jakes wolf standing beside Edward. Edward looked at Jake and motioned him away; Jake uncharacteristically obeyed and started walking into the cover of the trees.

Edward walked towards Bella with a stern look on his face. His face was more beautiful than ever, he didn't look like a stone at all. His pale skin was flushed and his cheeks were red from the sun. His amber eyes were friendly even though she was sure he wanted to look serious. When he got to her his face softened and he sat beside her on the bed.

"Bella, you have to let me go." He told her. "You have to be happy and live your life, you can't expect me to rescue you, and you have to stop doing careless things just to hear my voice."

Bella looked away ashamed by what he was saying to her. She felt his hands pulling away and she threw herself at his feet.

"Please don't go… Please stay with me… I know you're not here but I just want to be able to hear your voice at least. Edward I love you and you once told me that you loved me. Please!" She was on the ground at his feet begging him not to go but he continued to walk.

When he turned to look at her again his face was statuesque and hard again, the warmth that had been there before was replaced with the shimmering glow she had once seen the first time he kissed her. When he reached the tree line he turned to look at her once more and smiled his beautiful smile. Moments later he was gone and Jake was coming into view again. He came over to her and put his arms around her.

When Bella opened her eyes she was lying on the beach and Jake was sitting beside her patting away sweat and tears with the corner of her picnic blanket.

She was ashamed because he had seen her suffering and longing for someone other than him. Jake deserved better than this

"Bella, I know I told you I would stand by you and not expect anything in return, but I just think you really need to let him go. This is not the first time that you're lost the way you were just a few moments ago. I'm really scared when I see you like this. I tried to wake you but you just sat there sobbing and called his name." Jake held on to her hand as he said this.

It was dark now and she wasn't in the mood to hear what he had to say. She got up and walked away without a word. Jake let her go because he knew that all she wanted was to be alone. He fallowed at a distance to make sure she made her way back to her truck safely.

Charlie had come to have dinner with Billy and when he saw Bella walking up her face puffy and red from crying he decided to drive her home. He threw her truck keys at Jake and asked him to drive the truck home.

Jake got into the truck without a word. Charlie followed him home, she could tell he was very upset but he didn't make any demands or interrogate her. She sat quietly in the cruiser and wondered how Edward could leave her if he'd claimed to love her. Sometimes she wished she could love Jake as much as she still loved and longed for Edward, but she knew she couldn't do it.