I wrote a Bleach story! ^^

I love Urahara...he's just so...Urahara.

I do not own Bleach, or Neopets, or the Island Mystic

It was just a normal day for Urahara. Walk around his shop aimlessly, tease people, and, his favorite,
visit his favorite website, Neopets. The little virtual pets were just so cute, and didnt deserve to be called virtual or pixels. Poor Neopets.

Urahara's only pet,a bunny, was currently starving.

"Oh dear! My bunny, you poor thing! I must feed you, before the beautiful-but-insane bunny stalker, Rukia, finds me and hurts me, and steals you and names you chappy!" Urahara said in a sing-song voice.

After Urahara made his unnamed bunny bloated, he decided to get his daily fortune at the Island Mystic. The Island Mystic always gave the best advice. Many did not think so, but the advice actually reminded Urahara of the advice he gave.

Also, most of the time, the advice was true!

*flashback*

The advice was: "You will totally forget a Cement Mixer at the Smoothie Shop!"

It made Urahara have smootie cravings, so to the Smoothie Shop he went! On the way there,
he found an abandoned Cement Mixer, and decided to pick it up and put it in his pocket.
After getting his favorite flavor, Mysterious Shopkeepers, he left and went back to be a mysterious shopkeeper.

Later, he realized he forgot his cement mixer! He decided it must be at the smoothie shop, so he went back. He found his cement mixer, and had a happy reunion with it. They then went home, hand-in-hand. Not really.

Today, Urahara's daily advice was : "You will rapidly decide to stop wearing hats"

Urahara looked over his shoulder. Who was this mysterious Island Mystic to tell the great, mysterious, shopkeeper to tell him to stop wearing hats?

But, the advice had worked before. If Urahara hadn't have read about forgetting his cement mixer that Yoruichi was so jealous of.

Another thing. Yoruichi coudln't grasp the awesome power this Island Mystic was! She thought that the Mystic was fake and ridiculous! How could she?

So, it was decided. Urahara's wonderfull hat, was gone, shoved away in a closet.

The next day, a hatless Urahara looked at the daily adivce.
It was: " You will forget to feed your pets"
Urahara was confused. His bunny was bloated. Urahara quickly decided that if it wasnt his bunny that was starving,
then it was Ururu and Jinta who were the starving was.

"Children! It is time for you two to eat and eat and eat and eat! Because I know that deep down you are starving and that you just dont have the guts to tell me!" Urahara screamed.

The children stared at him like he was hatless. He was hatless. So, from that day, Ururu and Jinta were force fed by Urahara.

The next day's advice: " You will have outrageous fortune at the Bank."

Of course, Urahara hadnt gone to the bank today, so he decided to run to the bank.

"IM LUCKY TODAY...WHERE IS MY FORTUNE?" screamed Urahara. Everyone was staring at him. Like he was hatless. He was.

Yoruichi, who was in the bank, dragged Urahara back to the shop.

"What has gotten into you? Making scenes at the bank! Marrying a cement mixer! No hat! Jinta and Ururu are obese!" cried Yoruichi.

"The Mysti..."

"Is a bunch of bull crap. Say goodbye to your account. Im giving to Rukia. It has a bunny. And according to Ichigo and the rest of the damn highschool, she is obsessed with bunnies! So say goodbye!" yelled Yoruichi.

He did.

If you dont know what the Island Mystic is, he is a lizard type thing, like a witch doctor, that gives out daily and bizarre fortunes/advice.