One Last Time
Picture the life you dreamed of living. The person you pictured being with. Picture the job you dreamed you'd have. Are you living the life you envisioned for yourself?
Are you who you wanted to be when you grew up?
Open your eyes.
Take a good look around you. How's the view?
Do you like what you see? Think back again to when you were little. Are you living the life you pictured for yourself? Or are you still dreaming of something even bigger? Meredith Grey; When I Grow Up
Meredith was the first one to wake up this morning. She yawned. She was a bit tired, Derek had kept her up all night. But it was good, it really was. From the sounds, Bailey and Zola were still sleeping. So that was good. Today was the day where school kids were coming to Grey Sloan Memorial Hospital due to a field trip. A field trip to the hospital, funny isn't it? Dr. Webber had announced that a few days ago, allowing them to prepare for the guests. "You're already up." Derek said as he slowly becomes more aware of what is going on. "Yeah, I am." Meredith leaned over and kissed him softly. "Hey, I like that." Derek said when she broke it. "You do?" Meredith didn't wait for his reply, she kissed him for another time. "Maybe there is still time for a …" Derek suggested as his mind was way more clearly and he was able to use it without being overly sleepy.
Meredith tossed a gaze at the clock and shook her head.
"I don't think so, today we have to be there in time, hence the whole school field trip thing, remember?" Meredith teased him slightly. "Yeah, now I do." Derek said in reply and rolled over, embracing Meredith for a moment.
"Derek, what …" Meredith asked, surprised. They are supposed to be getting up now.
"Five minutes, Mer." He pleaded but somehow Meredith decided to ignore his desperate pleas. "Come on, Derek. It's your first day back. You don't want to be late for your first day?" Meredith tried to reason with him while trying to free herself and sit up. But Derek's arms were in the way, holding her back.
"You were late on your first day." Derek stated. "And who's to blame for that, huh?" Meredith smiled at him and poked her finger into his left shoulder. "Ouch." Derek exclaimed. "It couldn't have hurt that much. You're exaggerating." Meredith knew him. "You are right." Derek sighed.
"Told ya." Meredith laughed. "So, I know this is fun but we have to get up now." She said. Derek sighed deeply as he got up as well. In this moment, they heard Bailey's wails over the baby monitor. "I'll get Bailey, you wake up Zola." Meredith decided, tossing him a quick smile while grabbing the baby monitor and with that she was out of the door. She went over to Bailey's room. "Morning, Bails. Let's change that dirty diaper of yours, shall we?" She asked him in a voice that was reserved for her speaking with the kids. When she got Bailey ready, they went downstairs. But Zola and Derek weren't there. "Uh, looks like your sister and your father have got a hold-up or something." Bailey babbled some unrecognizable words and syllables in reply.
Meredith smiled at her gorgeous baby boy. "Meredith, you and Derek are up?" Amelia asked in surprise, not even bothering to hide it. "I mean after all the s-e-x escapades going on yesterday night? You keeping me up with all the reuniting?" Amelia hinted. Meredith knew what she was talking about. "Oh, I am perfect and so is he." Meredith answered.
"Not tired?" Amelia asked as she started making waffles for them for breakfast.
"Let's make some breakfast. By the way, where are Zola and Derek?"
"Upstairs, I think Derek has trouble getting his girl out of bed. I'm sure they will be here soon." And Meredith was right, as soon as she had spoken these words, she heard Zola and Derek coming down the stairs. Zola was still in pyjamas and not in her street clothes. "Derek …" Meredith started to ask. "Why isn't she …" But Zola interrupted her: "I'll do that later. Now I am hungry." "She has ways." Derek mouthed. "Aha." Meredith answered and put down a plate with waffles in front of her daughter. After breakfast, Meredith felt the need to get fresh air so she walked toward the front door but not without informing Derek before. He was preoccupied playing with Zola and Bailey, their two perfect children. This is what she always wanted.
"I'll be back, Derek. I just need to …" Meredith said as she left the house to get fresh air. Derek looked up for a second and their eyes met. His blue McDreamy eyes were looking at her, Meredith just couldn't help but smile. "Go for it." He just replied, building something with Zola. He was happy about some family time. He had missed so much of their life when he was in D.C. In retrospect, going to Washington D.C. was a mistake of massive proportions. He almost lost his family over this project. It simply wasn't worth it. He was aware of that now. Meredith walked around the house Derek built for their family to live in. Then she was standing on their porch, looking through a window at their perfect family and realized that she was just so blessed.
"I am the head of the department of neurosurgery and that means I operate on brains." Amelia told the class as she was introducing herself. "Cool." The class echoed loudly. "It is very cool actually because I fix the big, squishy computer that runs our whole body. The brain goes, everything goes." Derek suddenly was there too, Amelia shot him a look: "It is the coolest." Derek said, siding with his sister. Dr. Webber sensed the upcoming sibling rivalry thing between them and decided to put an end on it before it even started: "And this is Dr. Derek Shepherd and he's, uh, a member of our board." "I'm her brother." Derek cut him off, motioning to Amelia. Derek only smiled before saying: "I'm also a neurosurgeon. I work for her." He announced.
"Your sister's your boss?" A boy asked him. Derek nodded in reply. "My sister is my boss." Derek repeated once again. "Okay, kids, let's keep moving." Dr. Webber said, wanting to continue the tour through the hospital. "Thank you doctors." He addressed them. "Hm." Derek replied. "How hard was that for you to say?" Amelia said, she couldn't wipe off the grin on her face. "Rolls of the tongue." Derek replied, feeling the need to reassure his sister. "It's not going to be like it was before. I am not going to angle for your job, I am not gonna steal your patients, I just want to work." "You say that now but I know you, Derek." Amelia didn't trust him.
"I know us. You grew up bossing me around. I don't know if this can work."
"I am not going to steal your job." Derek tried to tell her. "I know you, Derek." Amelia left him standing on the staircase. "I mean it, I am not …" But Amelia didn't hear him anymore. This isn't going to be easy for you, Derek, a little voice in his head spoke. This isn't going to be easy for either of them but they would have to deal with it since Derek was coming back for good.
/
"So he's just back." Maggie stated.
She and Meredith were leaning against the railing of the catwalk. It was early in the morning. "For good?" She asked. "Yeah." Meredith replied. "Okay that face that you're making, I don't know you well enough to know what that means." "You know those very happy, cheerful people who have everything and when the fact that they have everything comes up, they act very humble and they say, "I'm just so blessed." Those people... you want to punch those people in the face." Meredith and Maggie were standing on the catwalk, talking about Meredith's perfect life. "Yes. I do know those people." Maggie answered promptly, not quite knowing what her sister talked about. She didn't strike her as the happy and bubbly person, more like dark and twisty.
Meredith nodded and added with a smile, a happy I-am-so-glad-Derek-is-back smile: "Yeah, I'm one of those people now." Maggie looked at her wide eyed.
The only thing she could think of was saying.
"Okay." Meredith didn't mind her short answer, she just continued: "This morning, I was standing on my porch of my perfect house looking in the window at my amazing, perfect children and my amazing, gorgeous husband, on the way to my amazing job. And I thought to myself, "I have everything I've ever wanted. I am just so blessed." She told her with a happy smile.
"I really wanna pummel your face in right now." Maggie said to her sister who just grinned at the cardiothoracic surgeon. Maggie stared at her with an open mouth when she heard her sister's next sentence. Meredith didn't really notice her sister gaping at her.
She was too happy right now to notice that. "Right, I would beat myself up except I'm too tired from..." Meredith chuckled happily. She didn't end the sentence, Maggie knew it anyway. She knew what Meredith wanted to tell her. She enjoyed Derek being home and the whole reunion-thing. Although she somehow guessed that Amelia thinks that the houses needs thicker walls since it's hard to sleep with all the reunion sex. "Were you about to say that you're exhausted from all the great sex you're having?" Maggie Pierce questioned her, taken aback.
She was happy for her sister, she remembered all too well the time where Meredith feared her husband replaced her with another girl he met at a bar in Washington D.C. Therefore, she was incredibly happy for the older Grey. "I am just so blessed." Meredith repeated Maggie frowned slightly and then she said: "I'm gonna walk away from you now."
Meredith laughed and went to find Derek. But that seemed to be more difficult than anticipated. She looked in the attendings' lounge, she was hoping to find him there. But she didn't find him there. "Derek, where are you?" She asked herself. She needed to find him, she needed to be sure that he was still here and not going anywhere. She couldn't be more than happy than she already was. But she wanted to find Derek. She found him talking to Amelia about some surgery.
"You don't do second place." Amelia said to him just as Meredith appeared from behind. "I do now." Derek's only reply came within seconds. "I missed so much when I was in D.C., I was alone and all I had was work, work and more work. It's different here, a good different. Something I want, and I don't care if it means that I am not head of neuro. This isn't about work or surgery, this about my life and my family. I know I made a lot mistakes in the past but I'll try to not make them again. It's a too big a deal. I am happy to be back, it feels free … So whatever elective procedures you have turn 'em on me, I am okay with it." Derek told his sister reassuringly but he didn't know Meredith had heard every word he said. "Fine, there's aneurysm that needs to be clipped. Why don't you take that …" In this moment her pager beeped.
"And I'll get myself a nice head trauma." Amelia smiled at him.
"Sounds perfect." Derek replied but Amelia already walked away toward the Emergency Department. "Hey." Meredith said as she surprised him. When he sees his wife, his eyes lit up. "Meredith, what are you doing here?" He asked pleasantly surprised.
"I just wanted to ask if you're free for a lunch date or something." Meredith looked at him. "And we can visit Zola and Bailey in daycare after that. I mean, my day's pretty slow right now." "We could do the aneurysm together. It's a basic procedure but I know you like neuro even if you're into general … also, it allows us spending time together. How does that sound?" He asked her.
Love.
Neuroscience tells us it activates the same parts of the brain as habit-forming addiction. It makes us feel like we can do anything, be anything, achieve anything.
And once we taste it, we want more.
The thing about love is, when it's good, it's so very good, and when it's bad, it hurts so much. And if you can't find a way to balance all those ups and down, it will make you crazy. Meredith Grey; Crazy Love
"Sounds like it could be fun. I'll be there, when do you take your patient down to surgery?" She asked. "And why are you doing simple aneurysm repairs?" She added. Derek sighed. "Amy wants to show me who is the boss now but I can deal with it. It's fine." He explained quickly. He really was okay with it. But Meredith wasn't convinced at all, she knew Derek. "Sure?" Meredith frowned. Derek was the type of surgeon who loves to operate on risky tumors and all … "Are you sure that you're okay with it, this isn't brain mapping, this is a surgery you can do in your sleep." Derek kissed quickly to stop her from talking. Meredith returned the kiss and for a moment, they both forgot that they were standing in the middle of a hospital hallway, a hallway that was empty and they were alone, at least for the most part. There were no doctors or nurses nor patients watching them. It felt good. It felt like being home again. That was feeling he missed. "I love you, Mer." Derek mumbled in her hair as he hugged her tightly.
"Didn't you want to clip the aneurysm?" Amelia Shepherd saw Meredith and Derek in their happy little bubble. "Yeah, Meredith's doing it with me, come." Amelia nodded only and turned around. Derek watched her for moment, then he told Meredith to go scrub in and he'll meet her in the OR. "See you in a few seconds." Derek called back, Meredith only replied with a smile.
After they finished that surgery, it was great working with Meredith in the operating room, they decided it was time for the lunch date but before they even reached the cafeteria, their pagers started beeping. Now that was foreseeable. "It looks like we have to reschedule that lunch since it seems like we have to work now, Mer." Derek said.
Meredith nodded, kissing him quickly on the cheek before walking toward the emergency department. When they entered the ER there was a lot going on. A group of school kids from the field trip was there, looking at the supplies and all when a group of policemen entered the ER after a bank robbery went wrong, ending up with policemen suffering from GSWs. "We need help." One of men shouted frantically. "Oh, that looks big." Meredith said.
"I'd say that too." Derek said.
/
"So, Derek's back." Amelia said as she stood next to Meredith who was watching her patient.
"Is that a question?" Meredith asked, sounding a bit tired.
"No, it's just …" Amelia started to say.
"And I am glad, I really am." "Yeah." Meredith answered, unsure of where this is going to go. "I'm happy for you and the kids. I don't want to make this all about me. It's just he says he wants to come back and just work. For me." Amelia told her.
"Still not sure what you're asking." Meredith replied, she couldn't make any sense of Amelia's words. "I am just asking should I believe that? Can I believe that?" Amelia wanted to know. "I do." Meredith said. "You do?" Amelia asked a second time. "Yeah, he's different, I don't know how to explain it but I think he realizes what makes him happy. He is choosing it and that makes me happy. I think this is his moment." She ended when Dr. Bailey interrupted their conversation. "Grey, what did you call me for?" She asked.
/
"Hey, Derek, have you seen a girl, about twelve years old, with long brown hair? She is missing." Dr. Webber asked him as Derek was about to walk past him. Derek shook his head. "No I haven't, I am sorry." He replied. "What's the girl's name?" He wanted to know.
"Julie. She's here with her class on a field trip." Dr. Webber answered.
"I'll keep my eyes open." Derek promised. When he entered the OR gallery to operating room 1, he saw a young girl sitting on one of the chairs, watching a procedure. "Are you Julie?" He asked. The girl nodded without looking up. "You know, normally you aren't supposed to be here." He said while sitting down too.
Derek heard that someone from the school kids went missing. Everyone was searching for her. "Huh?" The girl asked him, not really taking her eyes off what happened down there. Derek followed her gaze and saw his wife operating, recovering organs for transplant. "They're all looking for you." Derek explained. "Look, isn't this interesting?" She asked while nodding toward the leading surgeon and the patient who was being cut open.
"Yeah, it is." Derek smiled at her.
Derek and the missing girl were sitting in the gallery and were watching Meredith operate. "So his body is going to help save lives of people who need organs to live." Derek explained without her asking or more information, the girl's eyes were still fixated on the surgery.
"My grandfather had a heart transplant once. Will she give his heart someone else?" The girl, Julie, asked the neurosurgeon. "Yes, she will." Derek answered, looking down at his gorgeous wife performing surgery. "I want to do that." Julie suddenly said, referring to the surgery itself. "Be a donor?" Derek asked when he didn't know what the girl means. "No, the doctor, I want to do what she is doing." Now she was referring to Meredith. Derek chuckled slightly.
Then he said: "That's my wife. She is the lead surgeon and right now she is making sure that the artery to the kidney is long enough to attach this to someone else." Derek told her what happened and tossed her a little smile. "How did she learn all that?" Julie fired the next question. "She went to school a lot and practiced and she's …" For moment, he got a dreamy about Meredith before ending the sentence: "She's just really great." Julie looked at him and then said with a strong, decisive voice: "Yeah, I think that's what I want to be." "It feels good, doesn't it?" Derek asked her. Meredith was totally unaware of Derek watching her operate. "Knowing what you want to do next …" "Yeah, it does." Julie answered the neurosurgeon's question. In that moment Julie's mom entered the gallery, accompanied by Dr. Webber who led her there. "Oh my god, Julie." She came over and hugged her daughter.
Meredith was already home when Derek and Amelia entered their house. She smiled at him but it ended in a yawn. "Night, I'll just leave you two alone." Amelia smiled at them before she went over to her room. "I already put the kids to bed, so we're the only ones still awake." She explained tiredly. It has been a long day. "Have you eaten?" Derek asked when he hang up his coat before going over to the kitchen where he poured himself a glass of water.
"Should we order in something like Thai or pizza? I bet you're hungry after our lunch date couldn't take place." Derek asked her. Meredith played with that thought but in the end, she wasn't that hungry. "I think I might be too tired to eat." Meredith told him while gazing at him and his McDreamy hair.
"Are you hungry? I mean we can order in if you want to, maybe you should ask Amelia whether she wants something too." Meredith suggested. "No, I'm good. Tough case?" Derek asked her, coming nearer. He wrapped his arms around her tiny figure and they both headed for their bedroom.
"You could say that." Meredith answered.
She had no idea that Derek had watched her surgery.
"Can you just hold me?" She asked him, needing the comfort of her husband. When they were both under the covers, Derek put his arms around Meredith, he had no idea why he thinks now about how she still uses lavender shampoo. But she was, he knew that scent. She was feeling the warmth coming from her husband and it was great just to lay there.
"The missing girl, she watched your surgery." Derek said as he put his arms around Meredith and they were just lying there for a while. "She did? She watched me operating? Wasn't that scary for her, with all the blood and the organs …" Meredith turned around to face him. Derek nodded and kissed her on the forehead. "She now wants to become a doctor, seems like you have inspirited a young kid to become a surgeon." "Let's just sleep, tomorrow we're on call, right-" "What?" Derek shot up. "You're joking." He said. "No, I'm not. Now come and lie down." Meredith told him and she leaned over and gave him a kiss before finally drifting off to sleep. Derek watched her for few minutes.
A few days later
Derek has to go back to D.C. to end things properly. Meredith and Derek were both lying in their bed as Derek told Meredith about a funny thing about cars and Zola. "Zola wants a car, did she tell you that?" Derek asked his wife. Meredith only chuckled in reply. "A car? She wants a car?" Meredith sounded like she couldn't believe it. "I asked her, I wanted to bring something from D.C. and she asked me to bring her a car …" Derek started to explain. "I would like to have a car she said." Derek grinned when he thought back. Both of them started chuckling. "Let's wait at least ten years." Meredith then said. "Oh, it's gonna be here before you know it." Meredith looked at Derek as he said that. "And I told you … I said you're like coming out for fresh air. Like I was drowning and you saved me … It's you, it's always been you … I still feel that way, when I see you and our family that's the feeling and I want more – of this …" Meredith started to smile, she watched Derek. "… of us … of, uh …" He tried to find the fitting words. "I want one more." He finally said, meaning he wants another child from Meredith. Meredith looked at him with big eyes, didn't know what to say or how to react. "Let's have one more." Derek said with emphasis. "What …" "I mean it." Derek said, grinning at Meredith. "You're crazy." Meredith replied finally. But she didn't say no. "That's not a no." Derek answered, a smile covering his face, he was relieved Meredith would consider this – maybe. But she didn't shut it down after the first time she heard about it. So that's a good sign.
Meredith and Derek were lying in bed, face to face, snuggled into the cushions. "So tell me how you've been while I was in D.C." Derek asked her. Meredith recalled the loneliness that came along with Derek being in D.C., the sleeping alone. That was hard. "I would face-time Cristina, just prop her up where your head is now and sometimes she was in surgery and I just would watch her operate until I drifted off." Meredith told him. "I brought the kids to the bed for a while so we could all sleep together, I printed a tumor and I slept with that for a little bit." She knew it sounded a bit odd and maybe funny but Derek just chuckled in reply. She did too. They both did. It was good, just them together ... lying in their bed, laughing and just being together. "It's just weird the pillow has been empty for such a long time …" She said, looking back to her days without McDreamy. "I know I know." Derek answered. "But not anymore, soon you'll have me here every night when we're not on call." On both Meredith's and his face a smile, a real, smile appeared. "I know, I just wish you didn't have to go back at all. I wish you could just stay right here, right now." "That's my last trip and then I'll be back for good. I promise." Derek ended, he was looking at his gorgeous wife. "I know." Meredith replied. "But that doesn't keep me from wishing that you could just stay here and not need to go back …" After a few seconds, Derek said: "I missed you, you know. I missed us." He confessed in quiet voice. "I have too." Meredith glanced at him. She smiled and he just kissed her. They were both glad that Derek was coming home and that their lives could went back to normalcy after he resigns. But first he has to get to Washington D.C. to attend to that meeting before he was actually free ... But not right now, now he was here with Meredith and there was no place where he'd rather be right now besides with his family.
Meredith and Derek were both lying in their bed, wide awake. "You want to go again?" He asked, panting. Meredith and Derek both smiled 'cause it was so damn good. Then they heard cries coming from their son, Meredith and Derek turned their heads in direction of Bailey's room. "I guess not, Bailey's up." Meredith said as she hears the cries of her youngest child. "Oh." Derek said. "What if I cancel my flight …" Derek suggested, leaning towards Meredith, they were happy, they were a happy couple again ... "I could come to the hospital before I go to the airport and we could find an empty on-call room …" Derek smiled at her dreamingly.
"I have work to do." Meredith replied smiling, not wanting to show him how much she actually liked that idea - even if it wasn't realizable.
"Aw, you know as much as I like that idea, it's just not feasible, Derek. I have work to do at work and I can't do you too." "Okay, then it's settled, let's could go again …" He was ready to start, when Meredith loudly exclaimed: "No, you are terrible influence, absolutely not." With that she gets up, saying with determination in her voice: "We're getting up now."
Derek looked at his absolutely hot wife. But Derek stayed in their bed, smiling to convince her to come join him … "I know." Meredith said smirking, eyeing that husband of hers. "Why don't you make yourself useful and go change Bailey's diaper."
Meredith's eyes sparkled when said that. "Uh-" Derek sighed when Meredith threw a Bailey's baby-phone at him. "And you are terrible." Meredith's voice was slightly raised. She threw one of their pillows at him. Derek just laughed in reply, pushing the pillow away from him. "Have fun changing your son's diaper." She mouthed.
"I am gonna go shower." She smiled at him, obviously trying to seduce him. And it worked. Derek shook his head chuckling while he watched his wife disappear for the bathroom. While he is the one to change Bailey's diapers when he could have joined Meredith in the shower which was far more appealing than changing dirty diapers – but hey, McDreamy, changing diapers is part of parenthood! After Derek had changed Bailey's diapers he put his son in the high chair. Meredith already prepared the breakfast for their little one. It was carrots. Then Derek Shepherd walked into the kitchen, fully clothed. "Have you seen my phone?" Derek asked as he walked into the kitchen.
Meredith glanced at him while mothering Bailey, frowned and then she said: "Well, Derek, it's in your hand." She was pointing out the obvious but what she didn't know at the time that Derek didn't meant that phone, he meant the phone he got from the president. "Not this one. This one's mine, the government wants theirs back, I need to return it and I don't know where I put it." Derek explained the ongoing situation to Meredith. "Have you checked the couch cushions?" Meredith asked as she started searching for Derek's other phone. While doing that, she called out for Zola: "Zola, hurry up honey or you won't have time to eat breakfast." Then she asked Derek if he was nervous. "Are you nervous?" "Well, maybe I end up going to prison if I don't return the phone. I mean I don't go to prison for that, right?" He wanted his wife to reassure him that he won't go to prison even if he can't find the phone. "No, I meant resigning." She told him with a wide smile, unable to contain the happiness about Derek resigning and coming back to her and their kids and the dream-house that Derek built for their family to live in.
"I mean giving your job up isn't a small thing to do …" She didn't complete the sentence. "Oh it is …" Derek replied, still searching for the phone. "… in comparison to everything here, it is." Derek said reassuringly, while Bailey was face down in his food what nobody seemed to notice what Bailey was doing. "But Derek …" Meredith tried to say something. "Meredith, I meet with the president's council in the morning and give them my final report and official accommodation and then I am done. I'll be home before you even know it." He said, coming toward her. She smiled at him, catching herself thinking, that this was too good to be true. Her husband, the love of her life was finally coming home. "It's time. It feels good." He said, feeling relieved about the fact that he can go home to his wife, that isn't obligated to stay in Washington D.C. It's unbelievably freeing – for both of them. He took a big sip of his coffee. "I just wish you could be home already." Meredith said longingly.
"I know, I feel that feeling too. But you know, I'll be home before you know and then you know we'll have a lot you know, Starting-fresh-sex." Derek smiled at his wife.
"Derek." Meredith scolded. "Little ears in here."
"Sorry." He apologized but smirked while he said that. Suddenly they heard a key in the door. Surprised, they looked up. Amelia entered the house. "Oh, you're here?" Amelia said surprised as she opened the front door.
"We live here." Derek replied. "But you had a flight and you were going on and on about having an early surgery scheduled." Amelia was rambling, clearly nervous. "My point is you're not supposed to be here." Amelia first pointed at Derek, then at Meredith. She covered her nervousness with flashing a smile. Meredith and Derek were both looking at Amelia.
"My surgery got pushed back. Weren't you wearing that yesterday?" Meredith asked suspiciously but widely smiling. Amelia gaped at them with a half - open mouth. Before Amelia had the chance to answer, Owen opened the front door. "Amelia, you forgot your ..." He stopped in the mid-sentence when he saw Meredith and Derek standing there and watching them. Amelia looked to Owen, then back to Meredith and Derek. "Hey, ah …" Owen stuttered, taken by surprise. He most certainly hadn't expected Amelia's family to be there when he came to visit her or whatever. "I was just …" He pointed towards the door. Derek watched them, visibly amused by the scene. He turned to Meredith who just stared at them in shock. Even Bailey stopped eating his carrots and looked at Owen and Amelia. "I was just … her cell phone." Owen handed Amelia her cell phone. "Thank you." She said widely grinning. "Yeah …" He said, turning to leave. But Derek had other plans.
"Who wants breakfast?" He asked. "Anybody?" No answer. "We have coffee …" He offered. "I … I should probably go. I am gonna go." Owen suggested to end this awkward situation and with that he turned to go, closing the door behind him. Amelia didn't know what to do, this was really awkward. Then Bailey made some sounds, saving Amelia from her brother and sister in law. "Hey, little guy." She exclaimed and went to high chair, taking Bailey, saying: "Let's find your sister and …" Bailey was babbling some incoherent words while Amelia carried him away.
When Amelia left the kitchen Meredith turned to Derek, making a face: "So your sister and Owen? Really?" Meredith asked and looked at her husband.
"Yeah, she told me last night." Derek explained while putting on his coat. Meredith frowned when she heard that. "You knew that your sister's doing Owen and you didn't tell me?" Meredith inquired him, eyeing him. Why did he hide that information from her?
"I was supposed to tell you that?" He asked dumbfounded, not daring to look Meredith in the eye.
"Yes." She replied, her eyes sparkling. "I don't remember where I put my phone and now have to remember someone else's sex life?" He answered back flabbergasted. "Oh, I gotta go ..." But instead, Meredith came nearer to his body, Derek asking: "Oh you wanna go again? Huh?" Meredith didn't answer, in that moment she retrieved Derek's lost phone from his pocket. She chuckled as she held it up. "Oh. Hey, that's my phone." Derek replied and he and Meredith kissed.
Then they parted and Meredith said: "You know, I wish you could stay or I could come with you or something." Derek already opened the door. "I'll be back soon and you know that." Derek assured her. "I know, I know." Meredith followed him to the door.
"I just feel like I just got you back and now you have to go and I have to stay here …" Meredith rambled a bit. "I'll be home before you know it, Mer." Derek smiled his McDreamy smile. Then they kissed - for real kissed.
„This is my last trip and then I'll be back for good." Derek said, smiling at her.
/I am just so blessed./
Meredith smiled at him, the thought of Derek being back for good was amazing. "I love you, you know that, right?" Meredith nodded almost imperceptibly and whispered: "I love you too, Derek Shepherd."
A wide smile was on his lips. Meredith looked at him as he came nearer and nearer and finally their lips met – they kissed, as in really must part ways with her now though. There's the little matter of resigning from a presidential post in DC.
"I just feel like I'm losing you again after I just got you back." Meredith told him her thoughts. Derek replied: "You won't lose me, you won't ever lose me ..." Meredith smiled at him Then they parted and Meredith said: "You know, I wish you could stay or I could come with you or something." Derek already opened the door. "I'll be back soon and you know that." Derek assured her. "I know, I know." Meredith followed him to the door.
"I just feel like I just got you back and now you have to go and I have to stay here …" Meredith rambled a bit.
"I'll be home before you know it, Mer." Derek smiled his McDreamy smile.
Then they kissed - for real kissed. Then Derek said smiling: "Wait right here. Wait for me. Stay here." It were the exact words he was saying before he went to break up with Rose, after she built the house of candles where their real house is now ... Meredith smiled as she watched Derek leave, already thinking about when he comes back to her …
Meredith never thought it would turn out like this … That this was the last moment she had with a living Derek.
That the next time, she'd be seeing him would him be in a hospital bed connected to a dozen of monitors and leaving her with no choice but to pull the plug.
A/N: I wrote this because of the missing MerDer scenes in the 18th episode. So I filled the missing gaps a little bit. I really hope you liked it … please review.