Just a fluffy one-shot following 6x19. My take on the final conversation, but in a different setting.
It's been 6 years and I still haven't given up on these guys. Here's hoping the last 3 episodes satisfy my longing!
Edit: I'm thinking of adding another chapter to this story. Please let me know if you have any ideas! I'd love some feedback :)
Jane looked at Lisbon for a long moment. The parking lot was completely empty, and Lisbon was about to leave. They had stayed late to finish a case. But Jane wasn't ready to hit the hay just yet. The 'silver bucket' was too empty to return to at this hour, and besides, the moon looked particularly striking tonight. He couldn't ignore its luminescent pull even if he tried.
He knew that Pike wouldn't be happy if he found out that Jane had been with Lisbon for so long after work, but the knowledge only made him more determined to stay with her. Curse his anti-authoritarian personality.
"It's getting late," Lisbon yawned, looking at her watch. "I should go home."
"Nah," Jane said, waving his hand dismissively. "Why go to bed when you can have late-night tacos? Rodrigo makes them extra spicy just for me."
Lisbon tried to smile but faltered. "Thanks, but I think I'll pass." She made no effort to leave.
Sensing she had something on her mind, Jane stepped closer to her. "Everything okay? You and Pike doing good?"
The mention of her boyfriend sobered Lisbon up nicely. "Yeah!" she said over-enthusiastically, much to Jane's amusement. "We're doing great. I'm just... stressed."
"Well that's not good. Love is meant to be the opposite, or so I hear."
"You know what I mean," Lisbon said shortly. Her face relaxed, then tensed again. "Actually, Jane... I wanted to ask for your advice. I've spoken to Abbott and he said that Marcus's promotion is a great opportunity. I agree with him. But I'm still not sure. Do you..." Lisbon fiddled with the zipper on her jacket. "Do you think I should move?"
Jane's eyes widened but he kept his nerves in check. "Well."
"Well?"
"Do you really like him?"
"Of course I do!" Lisbon replied. "Why would I be with him if I didn't?"
"I don't know," Jane said, using a tone of voice that indicated he did know. It always drove Lisbon crazy when he used it.
Clearing her throat, Lisbon spoke again. "I feel like I should go. What do you think?"
Jane looked up, down, around, and back down again before he registered that Lisbon was watching his every move. He wasn't getting out of this one, and there were no interruptions to break the silence.
When he looked up, Lisbon felt her cheeks colour. She had only seen this look in his eyes once before, back when he had almost drowned. She had been burdened with the task of reminding him that his wife and daughter had been murdered. The realisation had broken his heart. He looked hopeless and lost. He was pleading for an answer that he couldn't have.
Jane felt his world tip slowly on its side. Lisbon was leaving. Really leaving. There was no possibility that she would stay for him, not after he'd pushed her away for so long. In some ways he'd tried to protect her, but mostly he had tried to save himself from feeling anything in his heart but hatred. Love was stronger, more powerful and demanding. It bound him to Lisbon like an anchor. If she was uprooted, he would never stop drifting. The waves would toss him around until he died of exhaustion.
The thought made Jane feel physically ill.
"Lisbon..." he said quietly.
He didn't know what to say after that.
Deep down, she wanted Jane to say that he loved her, needed her, wanted her. But maybe it was too much to expect from him. After all this time he'd given her nothing but pain and promises that made her heart twist like a washcloth.
So she backed down. She let her frustration win.
"I want to be happy, Jane," she started. "All my life I've done things to make other people happy, to make sure that they're safe. And I don't regret it. But now I'm older, and I need to decide what's best for me. And I think Marcus can give me what I need. A fresh start."
Jane's heart sank. He could feel the tears rising in his throat, threatening to overcome him at any moment. This wasn't right.
"You're not happy, Lisbon. You're the worst liar I've ever met," he said, looking at her intently. He was trying his best to push past his emotions. "Good and honest, Saint Teresa. That's your thing."
"Maybe there are other things," Lisbon said exasperatedly. "You think you know me so well-"
"I know you better than him," Jane replied. He lowered his voice until it rasped. "I know that your shoulders hurt when you're tired. I know that you like to eat ice cream and watch old movies when you're sad. I know that your eyes go wide when you're lying. And I know for a fact that you're unhappy, and nothing you say will convince me otherwise."
"Cut it out, Jane," Lisbon snapped. "I asked for your opinion, and now you're reading me?"
Running her hand through her hair, Lisbon felt the cool breeze against her skin. She'd forgotten how cold the nights were getting.
"I'm not lying, Jane. I'm just trying to figure out what to do with my life." Lisbon paused, then looked at him. "Thanks for your help."
With that, Lisbon turned away from Jane and walked back to her car, then drove away from him one last time. The glow of the streetlights turned blurry in her vision as she tried to hold back her tears. In her rear view mirror Jane was shaking his head. She tried to imagine why but her heart ached so much that she couldn't concentrate.
"Damn it, Patrick Jane," she said quietly, feeling his name on her tongue. It made her pulse quicken in a way that her boyfriend's name never could.
In that moment Lisbon knew she was done. She gripped the steering wheel and pulled to the side of the road, not even a block away from the parking lot. The sobs rose up through her chest and left her mouth without restraint. Her eyes were stinging and her nose was running.
"God, I'm a mess," she choked out. "Why does he keep hurting me like this?"
Feeling miserable, Lisbon cut the engine and unlocked her seat belt. Even in her emotional state, she knew that she needed to clear her thoughts before she could drive home safely.
Shutting the door, she leaned against it for a minute. The sound of rushing cars brought her little comfort, and soon she heard quick footsteps in the gravel.
Lisbon didn't even have to see who it was before she turned away, walking without knowing where she was going.
"Lisbon! Wait!" Jane yelled, his voice breaking. "Come back!"
After a few moments Lisbon stopped, tears threatening to stain her cheeks again. Jane ran until he was beside her and then stopped to catch his breath.
Before she could say a word, Jane wrapped his arms around her, enveloping her body with his own. He pressed his cheek against her hair.
"Please don't go, Lisbon." His voice was shaking and Lisbon felt herself breaking into pieces. "Please."
"Jane, I-"
"Please," he repeated, holding her closer than she ever thought possible. "Don't go. I- I can't take it."
After a few moments Lisbon pulled away from him. Looking up, she could see his eyes shining in the darkness, tears slowly running down his cheeks. She wanted so badly to reach out and touch him, press herself against him until the pain went away.
But she was his and he wasn't hers. This is the life he had wanted.
"Why didn't you choose me, Jane?" Lisbon asked weakly, hopelessness filling her voice. "I was always here. You knew that I always..."
Her words trailed off and the tears came back. She honestly hated him for making her feel like this.
"I knew," Jane said quietly, placing his hand against her cheek. His touch was so soft that Lisbon wondered if it was real at all.
"But I couldn't ask you to love me until you were ready. And I needed you to be happy, and for a while I thought Pike would do that for you, so I let you go. At least, I tried. But I... I need you here. I mess things up and you fix them. That's just the way we are."
Lisbon's eyes softened but she analysed his words nonetheless. "You don't ask people to love you, Jane. They just... do."
Jane leaned down so that her forehead was against his, and then he stepped away from her. She couldn't believe he was walking away from her again. Son of a-
"Come on," he said gently, gesturing towards Lisbon's car. "Let's go home."
Lisbon felt conflicted but she couldn't deny her curiosity. "Can't you walk? I didn't even drive a block."
Jane's smile came back, as brilliant as the sun. "Teresa, you know which home I meant."
Lisbon understood but her impatience got the better of her. She walked around her car and stood in front Jane for only a moment before she placed her hands on both sides of his face and kissed him. Ten years was long enough, she decided, and she resigned herself to feeling nothing but love for him. The moonlight cast its spell and made her feel brave.
Feeling his lips part without hesitation, Lisbon smiled and leaned into him. Jane lost himself in the feelings she stirred within him. This felt right. This felt unbelievably good. This was happiness. This was love. This was what he had needed for more than a decade.
Jane wrapped his arms around her and his hands found their place in her long, beautiful hair. He had dreamed of touching her for so long and now she was with him, pressing her tiny body against his so intimately that it made his pulse skip a beat.
He was hers and she was his. There was nothing that could make him leave her, not even for a second.
Drawing away for breath, Lisbon smiled so brightly that Jane felt his face go warm with pleasure.
"I love you, I love you, I love you," he whispered, gazing into her eyes. "So many times I wanted to tell you that but couldn't. Now I can say it as much as I like."
Lisbon laughed softly, closing her eyes and leaning against his chest. She felt so comfortable and warm and loved.
"I wish we could stay like this forever," she said wistfully. "I always dreamed about this, but I never thought..."
"That it would happen?" Jane quipped, kissing her cheek, then her jawline. "I've loved you since the day I met you. I'm sorry it took me this long to figure it out."
"Apology accepted," Lisbon hummed, fighting the urge to moan as Jane placed his lips against her neck. It suddenly dawned on Lisbon that they were still outside, wrapped in each others' arms at the side of the road.
"Okay, Jane," she said lightly, feeling the authority return to her voice. "No more funny stuff. We need to go to bed."
Jane laughed beside himself and rubbed his hands along Lisbon's back. "So direct, Teresa. Wow. I always thought you'd be a gentle lover, but maybe not-"
Lisbon whacked his torso playfully and let her hand slide down his arm until it reached his hand. Their fingers locked together behind her.
"Let's go, Patrick."
Another kiss. "Love you."
And with that, they set out into the night. Not as friends, or partners, or colleagues, but as lovers.
Just the way it should be.