A/N: Just a couple of hopefully comedic vignettes that have no connecting plot or anything else except that they following a theme; sex in this chapter's case. The scenes are elaborations of in-game material so no background is really necessary and any minor changes to dialogue and the like will be easily recognized. Hasn't been proofread so apologies for any mistakes, if they're serious point it out and I'll fix it.
Fornax
"Oh, wow…you weren't joking about the reach." Mandibles widening into the turian equivalent of a smile Garrus' last reservations about mating with a human vanished at Shepard's compliment. Looking at her Garrus drank in Shepard's expression of surprise, and something darker, at seeing his size.
Tearing her sight away from Garrus' generous endowment Shepard decided to demonstrate that she too could fulfill her end of the arrangement. Turning away from Garrus Shepard looked back over her already bare shoulder at the turian before bending at the waist while keeping her knees locked straight. Reaching down to her feet Shepard arched her back pushing her hips towards Garrus presenting him with a perfect view of her shapely ass.
Hearing Garrus' breath hitch Shepard suppressed a giggle at the ease of stimulating males, apparently regardless of their species. After removing her footwear Shepard undid her uniform pants wriggling them past the swell of her hips with a bit more shimmying than strictly necessary. Once past her hips the clothing slid off easily revealing ever more flesh before coming to a rest pooled around Shepard's bare feet. Daintily pulling one foot free from the cloth and placing it back on the floor, all while staying bent sharply at the waist, Shepard then raised her second leg out to the side in a languorous motion that drew Garrus' eyes along the smooth skin of her leg. Pointing her toe causing her long calf muscles to flow under her skin Shepard's pants dropped to the floor. Unable to stifle her amusement this time Shepard laughed lightly as she watched Garrus' awestruck jaw seemingly accompany the falling cloth on its journey to the floor.
Clad in only her panties…which Garrus noted with pleasure were definitely not regulation issue, the thin black silk having been 'commandeered without her knowledge' from Miranda, Shepard spread her legs apart while still staying bent over. Wrapping her hands around her ankles Shepard pulled her torso down until she was bent double facing back at Garrus through her spread legs.
Garrus watched Shepard run her hands up and down her calves and inner thighs before eventually teasing the keystone at apex of the arch her legs formed through the sheer material that concealed it from Garrus' devouring eyes. Removing a damp finger from where she had teased herself into readiness Shepard curled it in Garrus' direction gesturing the by now panting turian closer.
"So, how's my flexibility?" she teasingly inquired, knowing from his breathing that the approaching turian was incapable of responding coherently.
Having moved close enough to feel Shepard's heat against his skin Garrus looked down at the woman's slightly damp panties and wordlessly answered her inquiry by roughly pushing Shepard's already damp panties to the side. Having bared her center to him, Garrus placed his taloned hands gently against her hips rubbing his erection teasingly up and down the cleft of Shepard's already moist lips. Judging himself adequately lubricated by Shepard's own arousal he positioned himself at the entrance to her swollen, eager core. Unable restrain himself any longer Garrus let out a satisfied moan rocking his hips forward to slow sink himself inch by inch, further and further into Shepard's tight heat.
Releasing her ankles Shepard stood up and faced the scarred turian her hands resting on the sides of his face gently forcing Garrus to look her in the eyes. Sure that she had captured Garrus' attention Shepard spoke, "Hey, don't worry about it…after all you never said anything about having stamina."
Nodding to Miranda and Jacob Shepard took a deep breath to steady his nerves before facing the unknown. Opening the prefabricated dwelling's door the trio burst into the room their guns sweeping the small room in a textbook display of a forced entry. Their sudden arrival caught the occupants of the room by surprise; though they rallied quickly bring their weapons to bear on the Cerberus team.
Breaking the tense standoff which had developed a lone quarian stepped forward intent on brokering peace and avoiding bloodshed. Bravely assuming a position between the two battle lines the commanding presence of the quarian leader persuaded both sides to hold their fire. Having avoided a needless bloodbath the lead quarian turned its attention to the humans, especially Shepard.
"Shepard? Is that you…you're alive?" the obviously in charge quarian asked, feminine voice soft in disbelief.
Freed from the threat of imminent death Shepard was able to exit the intense state of concentration inhabited during battle. Straightening himself Shepard examined the quarians in more detail than his military conditioned friend or foe assessment had previously allowed.
And the only thing he could concentrate on was the quarian in front of him. It had to have been Tali; no other quarian would recognize him two years after his 'death', and the voice sounded like Tali, despite the commanding tone that contrasted with the timid, young girl he remembered from two years ago. Not being able to see her face Shepard went with his instinct, "Remember when I gave you that geth data, Tali? Did it help you complete your Pilgrimage?"
"Yes, it did." Tali responded before turning to her team and ordering them to lower their weapons.
Taking advantage of Tali's distraction as she dealt with her unruly squad Shepard looked at her more carefully. She had a new suit in a very pleasing purple and black pattern highlighted by gold and covered in decorative swirling patterns. Further evidence that this was Tali was found in the presence of her favorite weapon, the shotgun, strapped to the small of her back.
Absorbing these observations in the fraction of a second it took his highly trained eye Shepard's gaze continued to drift downwards from Tali's shotgun. Having taken in the sweeping curve of her hips Shepard's eyes were drawn back up as they followed the lines of Tali's natural hourglass figure finally coming to rest on her chest. Brows twitching upwards in appreciation Shepard devoured the sight of Tali's chest as it gently rose and fell with every paired inhale and exhale.
Mind running wild Shepard imagined what that bosom would look like as it heaved up and down covered in a glistening sheen of sweat. Due to their lifelong existence confined to a suit once freed Shepard was sure the nipples would be exquisitely sensitive, probably stiffening with the slightest attention, possibly merely from exposure to air. His eyes glazing over Shepard imagined his hands cupping Tali's warm globes of flesh while his thumbs rubbed delicate circles on and around her sensitive areolas.
Shepard's imagination drifted with his hungrily wandering eyes away from Tali's breasts to fall on her narrow waist and flared hips. Imagining his hands wrapped around her thin waist Shepard thought that Tali's wide hip bones would provide a sort of handle. Eyes glazing over as the thought of using that handle to hold Tali pressed against him as she pleadingly bucked her hips against his hardness entered his head Shepard shifted uncomfortably in his suddenly restrictive armor.
Following the line of logic that had led him this far Shepard's eyes roamed back to Tali's chest. The skintight design of the quarian suit acted as a sports bra keeping Tali's breasts firmly in place, but that was to prove no hindrance to Shepard's imagination. Building off the image of Tali's hips insistently rocking back to meet his thrusts Shepard could easily visualize the effect such vigorous movement would have on the quarian's beautifully exposed skin. Unconsciously licking his suddenly dry lips Shepard's mind filled with the image of Tali's boobs bouncing up and down in time to their mutual thrust.
Shepard could almost hear Tali's voice calling out his name in astonishment at the sensations unleashed by their coupling, 'Oh, yes. More…oh Shepard, yesss. Uhhh…by the ancestors, yes. Ahh! Shepard, yes! Ahh, Shep…'
"pard, hello? My eyes are up here." came the irritated voice of the now mature quarian, who appeared equally capable of leading a dangerous mission and leading Shepard to hopeless distraction.
A/N: PLEASE REVIEW. Depending on my amounts of inspiration, time, etc., I might add additional chapters with different themes. If you have any ideas for a scene that could have an amusing twist to it and want it written please let me know and I'll see what I can do.