A/N:
I just recently finished reading the entire "Chaos Walking Trilogy" by the amazing Patrick Ness, the last book being "Monsters Of Men". As you all know, it is an amazing trilogy with (what I believe to be a) fitting ending.
The only thing I didn't like was that was that the relationship between Davy and Todd never went anywhere. Sure, they became friends in the end of the second book, but their relationship was cut short due to Davy's unexpected death. I was so disheartened to discover that Todd and Davy's relationship was over for Davy really grew on me in the end.
And so, as a tribute, I've written this little "what if" one-shot for Davy/Todd, the question being: "What if the thing Davy was hiding from Todd was his feelings for him?"
Sorry for bad spelling and grammar.
Enjoy! :)
Title: Confession
Rating: T
Pairing: Davy/Todd
Summary: Before the unthinkable happens to Davy, he confesses his true feelings to Todd. Contains Davy/Todd and spoiler to "The Ask And The Answer".
Confession
Written by mpkio2
"Davy, please...hold on..." Todd whispers to me as he holds on to weak, dying (so cold) body in his strong, so strong arms...don't think it...don't think it...don't think it...
He was ready to kill me and for that, I feel like he betrayed me. I thought he was my friend! Maybe it was all a lie? Maybe none of it mattered to him. Maybe I was nothing (YerNothing YerNothing YerNothing), nothing like my father thinks about me.
I'm just unwanted, no-one wants me, and the one person I thought that...cared... for me...betrayed me. The one person I came to lo-
(Don't think it)
(Don't think it)
(Don't fucking think it!)
But how can I not think it when his holding me, looking down into my unfocussed eyes, the way he whispers "Please, hold on, Davy,", whispers my name so softly and filled with sadness; how can I not think it when his right in front of me? How can I not? How? HOW!
I can't.
I do.
I think it.
Because it's too late now, isn't it?
And even if he did betray me, even if my father wanted him as a son and not me (unwanted, I am), even though I believed him to be my one and only true friend, despite all that, I have to let him know. I have to tell him the thing I've been hiding for all the time I've been spending with him.
I have to tell Todd, everything.
And I mean everything, because in a couple of minutes, I won't be able to say it anymore.
I won't be able to say anything.
It has to be now.
It has to be.
Now.
Go for it, Davy!
Say it!
Say something!
Anything!
His there, here, right here in front of you!
Say it!
I look up into Todd's eyes as best as I can, for my eyes are slowly unfocussing, and he looks down into mine and I see the sadness in his eyes, feel the tears that drop and splash onto my face. Does he care? Does he care about me? The same way I care about him? I don't know, but I'm gonna find out...
"Todd..." I whisper in a weak, straining voice. "I'm sorry,"
"No," he sniffs, trying to keep back the river of tears streaming out of his eyes. "Davy,"
Davy.
He said my name.
My name.
"Don't speak, don't say anything," Todd whispers to me as he holds on to my body, trying to keep hold of me for as long as possible, his efforts going to waste. I think he knows this, but he continues his efforts. "It's me who should be sorry, not you,"
But what is he sorry for? Sorry that he put a gun on me, sorry that my pa loves him and not me, sorry that I am unwanted, that no-one loves me? Sorry? Sorry for what, Davy? Sorry for what?
"I'm sorry, Davy," Todd whispers, myself unsure if he had heard my noise. Maybe he was sorry for all of it? "I'm sorry,"
And I believe him. And I can see it all over his noise and I hear "Sorry," splashed all over him like he is a wall and the word "Sorry," is painted all over. I can see the sadness everywhere.
And in this moment of true feelings, in this moment where I see that Todd is being honest with his feelings, that his noise is up to me for read, after months of being locked away and unreadable to me, I finally see the truth within.
I take a breath and I open up, too. Like him, I let my noise become open and true, finally allowing him to see what I've been hiding from hi for so many months.
I wait for him to scream or to jump away and shout out something like "You're a freak!" (Or words to that effect...). But I don't hear that at all. After a few seconds of my breathe becoming more shallow, Todd looks down at me with wide eyes, shock all over his face.
I can't stop thinking of how he looks. I can't stop to think of how he smells, that scent of his. I can't stop but looking into his eyes. I can't stopping of what I want to do. I can't stop thinking of saying "I love you" to him...
But his already heard me say it. Not through my mouth, through my noise...
He looks speechless, absolutely and completely. He doesn't know what to say, what to do and I see it in his noise.
"Davy, I...err...well..." Todd stutters, vigorously.
I take a shaky hand to his cheek and I smile, weakly, calming his confused and hesitant mood.
"Todd..."
I lean up, our heads becoming closer, our mouths so close, his bangs are falling all over my face...
We kiss.
I'm happy, at last.
And as I fall to the ground, the last thing I think is "Todd..."
I'm in heaven and not because I died, but because I finally shared my true feelings to him:
Todd.
A/N:
I hoped you all enjoyed this little one-shot. :)
I really enjoyed writing it, that's for sure. I hated Davy's death (Cause I didn't want him to die...). But he had to. Yeah, it's only one-sided, but I liked this one-shot none the less.
I'm hoping to write more Davy/Todd in the future.
Please tell me what you think of it. Reviews will be most appreciated.
Peace out for now! :)
