In Reality
Disclaimer: I don't own RK but thoroughly wish I did. Maybe then, I wouldn't be so broke….Sigh
Ch1 Effects of a Loss
On the porch Misao sat. Her thoughts reeling back to all the recent events just passed. She wanted to cry, she felt like crying but she couldn't. She cried enough before, now she was just numb. Through the whole incident she allowed no one to see her sadness. This, she saw, was her problem. Alone. 'He' couldn't help, they couldn't help, no one. She sighed and closed her eyes tightly as if to erase her pain…the memories. But to no avail. She stared sadly to the others in the distance, laughing, smiling. It made her smile a solemn smile. They knew nothing of her feelings and their ignorance kept them happy. Blissful. She continued thinking deeply to herself but it was cut short. Another familiar presence was felt. She didn't even look up to who it was. She knew…she could always recognize this presence.. " Misao." She blinked, as if ignoring the voice. For once, her thoughts were elsewhere. " Misao." Snapping out of here temporary daze she responded with a quiet, " Yes?" Aoshi's eyes seemed locked onto her as if searching for something but couldn't exactly figure out what. " Are you all right?" 'If he only knew..' she thought bitterly and decided to answer in a question of her own. "Why do you ask?" He stared, then blinked as if pondering his words and setting them out carefully before him. "You…do not seem yourself." She stood up and looked him in his deep blue eyes, he looked away. " I haven't noticed." He returned his gaze to her, as she attempted to leave. " I have some things to do. Please, excuse me Aoshi -sama." Aoshi gave her another stare, and nodded, " Very well." Misao walked away trying not to look back at Aoshi still standing in the same place. 'I'm only a burden to him anyway. I just need to be…alone.' Once again she sighed and retreated to her room.
Returning from the temple, Aoshi noticed an odd sight. Misao was sitting on the Aoiya porch by herself. This was odd in itself as others usually are around her constantly. Aoshi noticed, she apparently was happy being surrounded by people.. She seemed to be smiling…but not normally…this smile was full of sorrow. She should be sad, after all that has happened. He knew she was but she never allowed it to be seen by others. It was unnerving and it irked something within him to know that she was hurting. Even as a child, through her own experiences with tragedy, she never allowed her grief effect anyone. Aoshi decided to speak up. "Misao." She didn't respond. 'It's as though she doesn't hear me…' "Misao." She looked up at him and very quietly said, "Yes?" His eyes looked her over. "Are you all right?" He asked silently waiting for her response. "Why do you ask?" Was her answer. He frowned, she obviously didn't want to speak with him. He blinked and stated, " You…do not seem yourself." Getting up from her sitting position, she looked him right in the eyes Her eyes , though, seemed to be filled with such hate…he looked away. She let out a small chortle and said, " I haven't noticed." Aoshi's eyes returned to her. " I have some things to do. Please excuse me Aoshi-sama." Bewildered, Aoshi nodded, she never was this formal with anyone. Even him. " Very well." Was all he said. As she returned to her room, Aoshi stood in the same place, unmoving. Something was definitely going on. Aoshi frowned again, and went to his room as well.
Misao sat on her futon staring at a book she's looked at a thousand times and have never read. But her mind wasn't focused on it. ' I can't concentrate…Oh well.' She stood and returned the book to its rightful place on the shelf. As she turned around she heard Omasu's soft voice calling her through the shoji. " Misao, the dinner is done. Could you tell Aoshi-sama for me, I'm a bit busy." 'Busy ignoring what's happened. Heh….' "Misao?" Shaking her head, she answered, " Thanks. I'll tell him." With a smile, Omasu walked in the direction of the kitchen. Making sure she was alone, Misao slid out of her room and walked into the direction of Aoshi's room. Once reaching his door she hesitated a bit and then knocked. "Aoshi-sama?" She heard some rustling and then the door opened. " Yes?" She blinked in somewhat annoyance, but didn't know at what. "Dinner is ready." He nodded and walked with her towards the dining area.
In his room, Aoshi sat in his desk going over reports of little importance. He hadn't done this for a while and felt a bit of similar nostalgia in doing so. He found it unfinished on a table and decided to work on it. Misao would probably ask him about it later. Right when he reached the third paragraph, he felt a presence. He knew this presence. He looked up and heard a soft voice calling to him. " Aoshi-sama?" He got up wondering why she wanted to speak with him. He looked at her and answered, " Yes?" She frowned at him and looked a bit piqued. " Dinner is ready." ' Oh.' He inwardly thought. Aoshi looked her over once more, nodded, and accompanied her to their dinner.
The dinner was a rowdy one. The room was filled with friendly chatter. Omasu, Kuro, Okon and Shiro discussing something, Kaoru speaking with Kenshin, and Yahiko, Sano, and Megumi arguing in good nature. Two voices were missing, and a third was never to be heard again. Misao was sitting at the end of the table, Aoshi had took a seat on her right next to Himura. Quiet and antisocial, very unlike her typical self, she listened to the chatter with disdain. A few of them tried to talk with her but she kept the conversations short. ' How can they just pretend it's the same before…the others….Aoshi-sa , no, Aoshi is he…even effected?' She took a sip of tea and heard laughing. Then silence. She felt a pain in both her hands and looked down. The teacup and broken and slivers of the glass remained in them, predominantly the left. Immediately the others turned their attention to her, asking if she was okay. Misao blinked, and stood staring at her bloodied hands. "I'm sorry," was all she said as she apologized for the broken teacup and left the room, leaving the others to question her actions. Using a bucket of water in the kitchen, she attempted to clean her hands. ' I didn't really even feel it…' She looked at the glass in her clean hands. ' This is going to hurt to remove.' Her hands immediately bleed more and she returned them to their place in the murky, red water.
" You should be more careful." A deep voice interrupted the silence. Misao's eyes fixated on the yukata clad figure of Aoshi. " I know." She replied with a smile and a bit of dry humor. He stepped closer to her to examine her better. " Are you all right, Misao?" She looked at his face wistfully, taking in and thoroughly loving any concern it held for her. ' Gods, I'm selfish. Shouldn't be thinking about that.' She shook her head yes and he replied, " You should remove the glass as soon as possible. It could become infected." Misao looked away from him for a second, pondering how to remove the glass in the most painless way possible. Aoshi's calm voice broke her musings. He pulled out some tweezers and bandages out of nowhere and reached for her hand. " Here." Misao looked a bit confused. " I'll fix your hands for you." "Oh." Aoshi's face was stern as he tracked down every chip in her hands with the tweezers. He did it very tenderly, and she barely felt any pain at all. Misao looked down at him. ' He's really worried about me? He knows I'm upset but…' Soon enough her hands were wrapped and he was flexing her hands to test the bandages. She smiled at him. " Thank you…Aoshi." He nodded a bit surprised, and walked out of the room. ' Maybe', Misao thought ' I won't be so lonely after all.'
NOTES for me Amigos!
Well, guys what do you think? Should I just trash this and pretend it never happened or work towards improvement in other chapters? Please let me know, I like brutal honesty. If you have any suggestions feel free to tell me and I'll work with ya! Chao for now!
PS: I know Misao is out of character. Kinda dark, really. Well, she did lose someone ( I hope you know who, if not it will be explained in future chapters.) She eventually will get back to her true genki-as hell-nature. And, of course, Aoshi will save the day! Haha!.