Okay... so some of this is old. Like dating back to 2009. Well, that is when the first Dissidia came out, right? Some of it is more recent. Instead of parceling it out in small peaces, I decided that I should cram it all into a psuedo-collection of writing, a la Robot Chicken or variety show.
No, it won't all be yuri... but you know I have to have some in here somewhere, right?
And I'm using ( ) to explain skips between scenes and notes... as usual!
Disclaimer: I don't own Dissidia or Final Fantasy... just the games and soundtracks.
Now, on with the show!
The Dissidia Suite
(This is not a poem... Just call it somewhat-lyrical madness!)
Dissidia, O Dissidia!
How sweet was your promise!
For you, I even bought a PSP!
But had I known your sting of betrayal...
I would have done it anyway!
Much fun to be had, memories to reclaim,
And to send a hug to a composer!
But of the pain of seeing my favorite heroine,
reduced to a shrinking violet!
(Mid-point rant)
Besides completely knocking the awesome Terra from her coolness pillar to the scared little girl, (A big fall from swining a sword for 9999) I wish they would have put this on the PS3... NOT ENOUGH BUTTONS! (Wei Yan voice)
xxxxx
Maybe Terra would be more fierce with Celes watching over her?
(Ancient rant over)
(Haiku to retract my complaints)
I am full of crap,
an addict I did become,
game disc is burnt out...
(poem-ish phase over – hallelujah!)
(A battle somewhere)
The clown laughed shrilly. "I see you're all alone, my little toy. There's no one to save you!"
Terra gave him a stern look. "I can defeat you all on my own." She leveled her sword and charged. Fire sprang from her hand, smashing into the fiend's barrier. Her blade ripped through, leaving a slash on the sociopathic nihilist's face.
"Ack!" The magical madman was shocked, vehement even. "Little girl, you just made a big mistake!" He powered up a blast of ice, which was sent careening her way. A couple of quick slashes shattered the chunk of frost.
He was quick to release all that the forces of darkness and insanity offered, but nothing could halt her progress. Magic was in her blood, but determinatino fed her strength far beyond her tame appearance. "No, I think you did." There was always something holding her back – fear. Now she faced the source of that fear and had no plans on holding back.
She transformed, calling upon her father's heritage. Power ran though her lithe body and into the surrounding air. "For peace!" She declared, charging up her largest fireball and let loose.
The clown let out a wail as the moving inferno collided with him and he collided with the wall.
As Kefka lay on the ground, he coughed. "Thatta girl. You may have stopped me, but you've only proven my point. You'll always be a weapon, a monster." Darkness began to absorb his form.
"That may be true, but there are people who accept me." She started to walk away. "And that gave me the power to stop you."
The chilling laughter would never leave her nightmares.
(End of that battle)
xxxxx
(A waiting room - pre-Duodecim)
Filling out forms was irritating to Celes, reminding her of her military days under the Empire. Burn down a town, fill out a Destruction of Viable Human Resources form. Plot a rival officer's demise? Fill out a K-13, Kefka's Done It Again, Unless It's Not Him form. This time it was worth it. This little piece of paper would give her a chance to fight at Terra's side again. It seemed unlikely since they weren't allowing more than one hero from any game... but surely to add one more heroine!
Beatrix sat beside her, elegantly working on her essay, "Why should YOU be in the next Dissidia?". The two had bonded over their shared experiences with doing unpleasant things for somewhat unsavory employers. Freya nudged her, silently asking for a good reference.
"So then, they stopped letting us carry hammers after the first couple of games! At first, it was nice to be able to move easier, but then the monsters stopped taking us seriously." A white mage complained to Elma and Lucile.
"You think that be bad? Imagine being stuck with this accent! Arrr!" Faris said, fist clenched in frustration. "Girls be laughin' at me while I try to chat 'em up!" She sighed. "And then losing a pirate role in a movie to some fellah named Depp! I wanted ta kiss Kiera!"
Further down the row, Quistis and Rydia were deeply involved in talks of whip techniques, summoning, and unobtainable brunettes who were dating flirts and confused knights.
Rikku and Yuna were asking Fran if they could touch her bunny ears. Ashe and Penelo leaned over to see if they would succeed where they had failed. Paine glared at her pink ink pen as if it had violated one of her rules.
Tifa was attempting to supervise Yuffie and Selphie. The two energetic girls had immediately bonded and seemed to be planning a party... or something. No one was quite sure. Although, Quistis took an interest when she dropped her pencil and bent over.
Aeris had opted out of fighting or even applying. She decided to use the opportunity to sell flowers which always sold well when yuri couples were around. Flower explosions are good liabilities when you're in the biz. Sachiko and Yumi were good for big bucks; thus, the diamond engagement ring on Tifa's finger.
The doors swung open and the room went silent. The "new girls" had arrived. The strawberry blonde looked rather irritable, but seemed to relax a bit at the happy and hectic room. Lightning wasted little time in grabbing an application and got right to work.
A strange sound filled the air. Tifa, from her former bartending work, recognized the tune. 'Foxy Lady by Jimi Hendrix. Wonder where it's coming from?' She shook her head, having heard the rumors.
Oerba Yun Fang entered the room as if coming from a smoke screen at a rock concert. Vanille gleefully playing the role of arm candy, while throwing out friendly waves. Fang just kept up the sexy smirk as she proceeded to flirt with the flower girl, who had started talking to Yuna about world peace.
Lightning rolled her eyes. "I can't take her anywhere." Then, pulled out a water bottle and started spraying the warrior woman. She sighed. "Vanille? Your woman is wandering..."
Vanille pouted and made a cute little frustrated noise (you know which one), and Fang instantly returned to her side with a small bouquet of flowers.
(end waiting room)
xxxxx
(a familiar scene... a.k.a "Haven't We Done This Before?")
Tifa dodged carefully, avoiding Sephiroth's fierce slashes. Sweat stung at her cuts. She was working her opponent into a corner carefully to beat the crap out of him when he couldn't dodge so gracefully.
Then, Momma's Boy (as he's known on hater sites) pulled out a new trick. In a state of panic, she called for her ally.
The Flower Girl appeared in all her glowing glory causing the sword-wielder to pause. He stared at her curiously, memories itching at his brain. His sword arm twitched. He made a few odd stabbing motions before deciding on the downward stab from Hell's Gate (just realizing that's what it's originally from now...).
Sephiroth leapt gracefully into the air and began his decent. His shadow formed over the innocent Ancient and he grinned maliciously.
Then, it was time for a surprise. Aerith rolled to the side and blasted him with a Bolt spell. Tifa immediately followed up with a horrific uppercut to Seph's man-goods that caused censors in 15 countries to cringe and him to lose all his bravery.
Tifa grinned as she pulled in for the haymaker... VICTORY! (cue music)
Aeris tackled Tifa and gave her a nosebleed-inducing congratulatory kiss.
(static)
End
Thanks for allowing me to waste a few moments of your time with my more recent writing attempts. Thanks for those who have stuck with me and inspired me to post these (special nudge to Tuku for prodding me to get that last scene out there).
And Prologus was worth it for the giggle-tastic yuri combo of Tifa-Aerith. (I've converted from the "Aeris" camp since Crisis Core).
Got to meet Nobuo about 2 weeks ago at a FF: Distant Worlds concert. F.Y.I. his hands are soft and his aura is like Christmas morning when you're 7 years old. Wheee!
Review if you will! If not me, then get the next author! Cheers!