Title: Theres Oceans Between Us [prequel to This Man No Longer Exists]

Rating: I'll go with T again x3
Genre: Angst/General Unhappiness
Disclaimer: Masashi Kishimoto owns the characters.. I just write c:
Summary: Theres something wrong with Iruka. He puts it off to no sleep and coffee, but Kakashi is sure its more. (/lame)
Notes: Prequel/the story behind This Man No Longer Exists. Enjoy (:


Kakashi had been surprised when Iruka, the ever-stable one, pointed out one morning that he'd been hallucinating for the past week. Of course, the chuunin had only put it off to lack of sleep and too much coffee, half-heartedly glaring and blaming the jounin currently holding him in pale arms.

He had understood when Iruka finally admitted, weeks later, that it was Mizuki he was constantly seeing appear. It's one thing to have your best friend die, but another to have them betray you. To know that they're rotting away in cell, not so far from you, waiting to die. And all because of a power-driven escapade.

But it had taken its final straw when the brown haired man had told him he'd subconsciously begun to follow what the hallucinations were telling him. It wasn't anything bad really, just another voice in his head, whispering little things like 'Don't look up now, but we can catch the student with the exploding tag…' or 'Step right to avoid the paint splatter.'

Kakashi lost it then, screaming at his lover for not telling him sooner. In one night, one glorious battle over Iruka's mental health, he had finally been able to drag the stubborn teacher into Tsunade's office. If it were anything or anyone else, he would have dumped them at the medic-ward and left. But this was Iruka. His 'Ruka. So, as the over-protective dog he was, the silver-haired nin had entirely towed Iruka to the Hokage's office.

The fifth Hokage had let Iruka and Kakashi go, giving Iruka time off from his job and a requirement to meet with some sort of counselor. The pre-genin sensei had been calm throughout the meeting, nodding and taking his orders. After a walk home, silent and incredibly long, Iruka had snapped, screaming and yelling at the jounin as no one else could. Or had ever dared to.

Iruka had been unbelievably upset at his boyfriend for dragging him to Tsunade, making him take time off, and for even once doubting that Iruka wasn't sane. Kakashi had tried to say sorry, that it was for his own good, but Iruka would hear none of it. They didn't speak for weeks, and Iruka had stayed over at Raidou's for that time.

Kakashi was a mess. No matter what he did, he couldn't get the familiarity of Iruka's smile, the sensei's blush or his extreme temper. It was the most indifferent, uncaring cold shoulder that anyone had seen Iruka give.


"Baby, please. Baby open up…" Kakashi whined, leaning helplessly against Raidou's door. His visible eye drooped tiredly, a sign of little to no sleep.

"Kakashi, please. I just need time.. I- you know this!" an equally tired voice retorted. Iruka was leaning, almost mirroring Kakashi on the other side of a locked door.

A deep sigh echoed from the Copy-nin.

"You don't even smile at me anymore, Iruka. I'm trying to help you! I know I forced you into talking to Tsunade. That was wrong…" Kakashi babbled desperately, pounding his fist against the door. Finally, he stopped mid hit as he heard Iruka's footsteps fading from the apartment. Kakashi's head swiveled up, and he turned around, sprinting around the side of the building.

Chakra flowing into his legs and arms, he stepped up the walls, using his hands to pull himself up. At last, he reached the intended destination.

Window.

Sighing, he pulled himself up, thanking the Gods the window was open slightly. Pulling it open, he ducked inside, glad Raidou was out for the night. Immediately, a threatening chakra entered the room, before Kakashi had to duck down, narrowly avoiding the kunai sent in his direction. Looking up, the nin took in a sharp breath.

Iruka was standing, one arm on the wall, supporting himself heavily. His ponytail was loose, stray hairs framing his face, but his eyes were dark, almost dead. The teacher shook, before running to Kakashi, sniffling. Grabbing the jounin, he pulled him into a hug.

Kakashi wrapped his arms protectively around Iruka, comforting him.

"Sometimes I doubt when I chose to become a ninja, Kakashi. I really put everything on hold. I'm sure I could make jounin… Sandaime was always confident in my abilities, Kakashi…" Iruka gave a small smile, burying his head in Kakashi's shoulder.

"You know, I'm supposed to be the strong one in this relationship. But you always seem to prove that wrong, Kakashi." Iruka continued, his mind jabbering endlessly. Kakashi gave a wry smile, his hands tracing nonsense patterns onto the chuunin's back.

'There have been plenty of times, Iruka, where I'm the one breaking down…' he though sadly, before turning himself and his lover around, pushing him onto the bed.

"Shh. Iruka. Quiet, you need sleep. " Kakashi paused and chuckled sourly. "We both need sleep."

Iruka nodded and pulled off his shirt, already in his black sweats. Kakashi followed suit, before grabbing Iruka and tugging him into Raidou's empty bed. Iruka curled into Kakashi breathing his scent in deeply, closing his eyes.

Kakashi continued to draw patterns on Iruka's back, before he ran over raised skin on his shoulder blade. He blinked in confusion, not remembering any scar that Iruka had there. Propping himself up on one shoulder, he peered at the dark-skinned man's back, and gasped.

A small, raised seal sat on his back. Kakashi stared at it studiously, trying to recognize the familiar seal. Exhaustion overtaking him, Kakashi began to nod off, before he realized it. Eyes snapping open, he turned Iruka over quickly running his pale fingers across Iruka's back.

Mizuki.

Iruka snapped awake, and looked up at Kakashi, gasping. Shoving away from the nin, he jumped back, off the bed and stood, startled on his feet.

"Does it hurt?" Kakashi asked, narrowing his eyes. Iruka just stared, his eyes widening still, before he turned desperately. Tugging a shirt on, the sensei frantically searched the dark floor for his weapons.

"Woah, Woah, Iruka.." Kakashi said, standing and walking towards his boyfriend. He reached out, letting his hand rest on Iruka's shoulder.

Brown hair still framing his face, he turned around wildly, glaring at Kakashi.

"Get away from me." He hissed.

"Wh-Wha-?"

"I said, get AWAY, Mizuki. I'm blaming you for everything, It's all your goddamn fault!" Iruka yelled pushing Kakashi's hand off him.

Kakashi's eyes expanded, before he narrowed them, moving closer and grabbing Iruka.

"Snap out of it! You're fucking hallucinating again!" he hissed into Iruka's ear.

Iruka froze and Kakashi snapped his fingers in the scarred mans face.

"K-Kashi?" he whispered, trying to steady his breathing.

"Hn." Kakashi grunted in response.

"Kashi, I need some more time." Iruka finished, stepping out of Kakashi's grasp and towards the door. Kakashi sighed and grabbed onto Iruka's hand.

"I can't let you do that… There's a seal on your back." Kakashi said, grasping Iruka's shoulders and turning him around. "If I can figure out how to dispel it, maybe this will all go awa-AHG!" Kakashi hissed in pain as a hand connected with his face.

Iruka had turned around and had just slapped Kakashi.

"There's nothing there, and if there is, I deserve it." He whispered lowly, before grabbing a pre-packed bag of supplies and brushing past Kakashi and out the window.

Kakashi stood, hurt.

'Sure, we've gotten in our battles, but as nin… It's detrimental to injure on another. We've never hurt each other purposely. Not like this.' He thought sadly.


Iruka stood, the breeze ruffling his recently fixed ponytail. The pack on his backside hug heavy with supplies, and he began to whisper his last goodbyes, brown eyes glazed over slightly.

Kakashi teleported, ran, practically flew towards the village gates, somehow knowing where his lover was. A soft whispering alerted him to the chuunins presence, and Kakashi darted forward, latching onto Iruka's wrist.

"Don't go." He whispered, tugging ever so lightly.

Iruka ripped his hand from Kakashi, and turned to the jounin. Stepping forward, he looked into a coal black eye sadly. Kakashi let his body slouch a tad as Iruka moved towards him. He almost sighed in relief, thinking the academy teacher was coming back.

His thoughts were cut off by warm lips pressing against his own, still masked. Kakashi's visible eye blinked dumbly, before Iruka turned and ran.

'I know you don't know where answers are, Iruka. I won't stop tracking you though… I'll bring you home.' Kakashi thought, before turning away mindlessly from his once lover.

'The man you loved, he's not here, really. The one leaving you has replaced him. Iruka no longer exists.'

Kakashi's mind processed this slowly.

"Right?" He whispered inaudibly to himself.


Notes:Theres something wrong with Iruka.

Lets play the blame Mizuki game! That one's my favorite (; Well the idea here was that the seal caused hallucinations that Mizuki could project to Iruka when it activated, which it did. I wanted to go more in depth, but this fic felt like it needed to be kept short. The plot bunnies were working, but my writing wasn't. No worries, I have another fic in the works (;