Disclaimer: I don't own criminal minds or anything to do with it.

Thank you to ArwenLalaith for being my beta reader and fixing my grammar and spelling mistakes, and improving my story.

All life is an experiment. - Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.

*****

"One year," said Olivia, smiling to herself and leaning back in her chair. It had been one year last week that she had been married. She smiled to herself remembering how nervous he had been when he proposed; he barely got the words out, but that was her Spencer. A lot had happened since they had gotten married, she sadly lost her dog Quincy and they had bought and moved into a small house.

"Hey, Dr. Reid," joked Monica walking into her office.

"Are you ever going to call me Olivia or are you going to call me Dr. Reid forever?" she retorted, smiling.

"Eventually," said Monica, "The Grayson twins are here for their six month check-up," she added, handing her the file.

"Coming," said Olivia, standing up sharply, then clutching the edge of her desk when she was hit by a sudden wave of dizziness.

"Honey, are you alright?" asked Monica, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"Fine," said Olivia, straightening up.

"You know, if I didn't know any better…" started Monica.

"Don't start," Olivia cut her off, exasperated, as she left her office.

"I'm just saying, the other day you said the coffee tasted funny…" she started again.

"That's because someone mixed the last little bit of three creamers together, all different flavors," said Olivia, quickening her pace down the hallway.

"And then the other day you were falling asleep at your desk…" continued Monica, ignoring her.

"And that was because I was up all night the night before," she replied, practically running to get away from the unexpected inquisition.

"Now you're having dizzy spells," said Monica, keeping pace.

"I saw about a dozen people who were having dizzy spells and fatigue this week, it's just a nasty flu that's going around," she replied, turning the corner. "I'm not pregnant, we decided we don't want children. With all the horrors he sees and I sometimes see, not to mention the chance of passing along his mother's mental illness we decided it's for the best." Monica opened her mouth to say something. "Plus," interrupted Olivia, "We're both only twenty-nine, we have plenty of time if we change our minds." She quickly shut the door to the exam room before Monica could continue.

******

It was just after four and Olivia was exhausted. It had been a very trying day; luckily for her, her last appointment of the day had cancelled. "So, when's that genius husband of yours getting back?" asked Monica, collapsing in the chair in front of her desk.

"Late tonight," she said, rubbing her temple. There had been a very gruesome case in Wyoming, he had been gone almost a week. She went to stand up, but collapsed back on the chair as the room started to spin. She leaned forwards and placing her head in her hands.

"Olivia," said Monica gently, coming around the desk and sitting on the edge, "I know you're going to start yelling, but are sure you're not pregnant?" she asked.

"Truth be told, I had the same thought the other day," said Olivia, taking a breath and sitting back in her chair. "I did two tests and they both came out 'not pregnant'. I'm sure it must just be that flu that's going around."

"Probably, but home tests aren't always accurate…" said Monica, pulling her up out of her chair. "There's only one real way to know…"

"Yeah, I know," Olivia sighed quietly.

"So," said Monica cheerfully, "What will it be, blood or urine?" she asked. Olivia just gave her a look.

*****

It was a few hours later when Monica came back into the office, a piece of paper in her hands. "Just in time," said Olivia, standing up and shutting the file she was working on, "I just finished my paper work. Come on, admit I'm right, it's just the flu."

Tension knotted her small frame when she saw the look on Monica's face. "Well, normally I'd say congratulations, but I think you'd hit me if I say that…" she replied with a small smile.

Olivia sank back into the chair she just vacated. "Please tell me you're kidding…" she said hopefully.

"You're pregnant," said Monica, handing her the test results, "About seven weeks." She gently rested a comforting hand on her shoulder.

Olivia stared at the undeniable truth in black and white before her and still couldn't believe it. "What am I going to do?" she lamented, "My husband works a dangerous job and is gone a lot, it would be almost like being a single parent. Plus my work schedule… What am I going to do?" she repeated, burying her head in her hands.

"The first thing you're going to do is talk to your husband," said Monica, pulling her out of her chair and wrapping her up in a reassuring hug. "Come on, I'll walk you out."

******

Midnight had long since come and gone and Olivia was still sitting restlessly on the couch, waiting worriedly for her husband to get home. She kept placing her hand on her stomach, she couldn't believe there was a human life growing in her; she was petrified. On the other hand, part of her felt excited, would it be a boy or a girl? Would it have her blue eyes or his hazel? Would it be a genius like its father? Would it come out with some horrible disease? The good and the bad questions kept running through her mind. She turned toward the front door when she heard the scraping of the key in the lock.

"Spencer," she greeted as he came into the room.

"You startled me," he said, coming and sitting on the couch beside her and giving her a kiss, "I thought you'd be in bed."

"I wanted to wait for you, there's something I need to tell you," she said, shaking slightly.

"What is it?" he asked, worriedly taking her hands.

"I'm-" she froze and said the first thing that came into her head, "I'm wondering what happened to those kids?" she asked, referring to the case having seen on the news the final two victims were parents of two children, a five year boy and an eighteen month old girl.

"Oh," he said, visibly relaxing, "Their grandparents took them in; the little boy, Sam, is going to receive counseling." He was silent for a moment as if lost in thought before adding, "We're so lucky not to have to worry about that."

"What do you mean?" she asked, confused.

"Children; where they would go if we both died, the psychological effects it would have on them…" he answered.

"Yeah," said Olivia distantly, tears springing to her eyes; she couldn't tell him, not now.

"What's wrong?" asked Spencer, pulling her into a hug.

"I'm just sad for those kids," she lied burying her head against his shoulder.

"It's okay," he placated, standing up and pulling Olivia up with him, "Come on, let's go to bed."

That night Olivia barely slept, thoughts kept racing through her mind. How could she tell Spencer? How would he react? She even considered not having the baby at one point, but she quickly decided against that; even though she was scared to death, she wanted this child. Finally, around five, she quietly got out of bed and made her downstairs and just sat on the couch with her hand on her abdomen, lost in thought.

"You're up early," said Spencer, coming into the kitchen a few hours later. She was sitting at the kitchen table, a cold cup of decaf coffee in front of her; she had taken a few sips, but stopped when her stomach started churning.

"Couldn't sleep," she said, looking up at her husband. "It's Saturday, are you going to work?" she asked, noticing he was dressed for the office.

"Yeah, I need to fill out a report from the last case, it was too late last night so I didn't bother," he said, pouring coffee into his travel mug. "I figured after I did that I could run some errands, so I'll just be a few hours," he added, turning to face her. He quietly studied her for a moment, watching as she stared at the coffee before her, strangely focused on it. He couldn't help but feel a pang of worry. "Liv, are you sure you're alright?" he asked, coming to stand beside her.

"Oh, yeah," said Olivia, snapping out of her reverie and standing up. "Have a good day," she said, giving him a kiss before leaving the room.

"Yeah, bye," he called after her, shaking his head, not entirely believing her claim. He would have to talk to Emily and see if she could get anything out of her.

******

"Emily," said Spencer as he finished up the last of his paperwork, hoping that maybe she held some idea as to Olivia's newfound pensiveness.

"Let me guess, you're already done with your paper work and you want to gloat, seeing as I'm only about half-way done," she replied jokingly.

"Are you busy tonight?" he asked.

"Are you asking me out, because you know you're married to my sister," she retorted, a good-natured smile on her face. Noting that he barely cracked a smile in response to her joke, instead remaining thoughtful, she turned serious, "Aaron gets Jack this weekend, we're taking him to a movie tonight."

"Before you go out, do you think you could check on Olivia?" he asked.

"Of course, what's wrong?" she asked, worried.

"I'm not sure… She's just been really upset and distant since we got home yesterday, I'm just worried," he replied.

"As soon as I'm done with this paperwork I'll go see her," she assured, turning back to her paperwork to hurriedly finish.

******

"Let me guess, my husband sent you," said Olivia, rolling her eyes as she let her sister into the house.

"Yeah, he's really worried," she said, following he sister into the kitchen, "I'm a little worried too, you don't look so good…"

"Don't be," said Olivia, setting a cup of coffee in front of her sister before sitting down herself. "I'm fine," she reassured, a hint of tiredness fraying her voice.

"Come on," Emily said exasperatedly, "Did you forget who you're talking to?"

Olivia sighed heavily and shut her eyes. "If I tell you, you have to promise not to tell Spencer, I have to tell him on my own," she insisted.

"I promise. You're not sick are you?" she asked.

"No," she paused to prepare herself, "I'm pregnant."

Emily almost choked on her sip of coffee and started laughing. "No really, what is it?" Olivia just gave her a pointed look. "You're really pregnant?" Emily asked.

"Seven weeks," replied Olivia, attempting to smile, but landing closer to a pained grimace.

"Congratulations," Emily said, leaning over and wrapping her sister in a hug.

"Thanks…"

Emily examined her expression, noting the lack of joy she had been sure would be there. "So, what's the problem?"

"Spencer," said Olivia with a sigh, "He talked to me about your last case and he was saying how happy he is we don't have to worry about those things since we don't have children. Plus he's so anxious that any children we have might develop his mother's illness," she explained, tears prickling her eyes.

"Oh, Olivia, he was just upset over the case, I'm sure when you tell him about the baby he'll be speechless, petrified, but also very excited," she reassured.

"You sure?" she sniffled, wiping the tears away.

"I'm sure," said Emily smiling. "Just think how Mom will react to being a grandmother," she joked, attempting to make her sister feel better.

Olivia let out a teary laugh, "She'll love it as long as the kid doesn't call her Grandma. Then she'll ask when you'll be giving her one.

"I think that ship has sailed," said Emily indecipherably.

"Em, you're only thirty-eight, you still have time to have a baby," Olivia reassured, squeezing her sister's hand.

"I know, but I don't think so… I'm just going to enjoy being a step-mom to Jack," she said, smiling.

"You two are getting married?" asked Olivia happily.

"We're talking about it. And speaking of Jack, I do have to go, we're taking him to a movie. Unless you need me to stay, I'll can just call Aaron and let him know."

"No, no, go, I'll be okay," said Olivia, leaning forward and giving her a hug.

"Okay, I'll see you later." She ran into Spencer as she was about to leave.

"So, is everything alright?" he asked nervously.

"Yeah, you should really talk to her or better yet, let her talk and you listen," she told him, patting him on the shoulder and going out the front door.

"Olivia?" he called out.

"In the kitchen," she called back. She waited until he entered the room to say anything else. "Spencer, there is something I need to tell you," she said, standing, "I'm seven weeks pregnant…"

He seemed to struggle for words for a few moments while she waited expectantly for his reaction. "Your preg –" he managed to choke out before the end of his sentence was lost as he collapsed to the floor in a dead faint.

"Just perfect," Olivia sighed sarcastically before going over to him.

******

"What happened?" asked Spencer trying to sit up as a throbbing pain pounded against his skull.

"Here, don't try to sit up, I'll raise the bed," said a voice he couldn't locate as the bed started to rise until he was in a sitting position. He opened his eyes and saw that he was in an emergency room bed, Olivia sitting beside him. "How many fingers do you see?" asked Olivia, holding up three fingers.

"Three," replied Spencer, reaching up to touch his forehead.

"You hit the kitchen table on the way down. You're going to have a nasty goose-egg and spectacular bruise for awhile," replied Olivia sympathetically.

"Are you sure?" asked Spencer, suddenly remembering the events catalyzing his little accident.

"Yeah, the bruise is already forming," she replied, gently bushing her fingers against it.

"No, I mean about the baby?" he asked.

"I know what you meant…" she said quietly, looking away, "I was just stalling…" She sighed heavily and gently rested a hand on her stomach before continuing, "Yes, I had a blood test done, I'm definitely pregnant."

"Wow," he said breathily, "I mean wow, just wow…" he stuttered.

"Do you think you can say anything else?" asked Olivia.

"I thought we were using protection because we decided we didn't want children," he said.

"I know… I guess nature had other ideas. Do you think you could be happy about being a father?" she asked, nervously biting her bottom lip.

"I think if our child looks anything like you, I'll be ecstatic," he answered, smiling. Happy tears clouded her eyes as she lunged happily into her husband's arms.

A/N: Just so you know this won't be a typical happy fluffy pregnancy story, there will be drama!