Author's Note: I AM SO SORRY. IT HAS TAKEN ME FOR FREAKIN' EVER TO POST A STORY! And this is hardly a story. But fear not! It appears like I'm inactive, but I'm actually writing a fanfiction down in a notepad and will post it when the first chapter is typed up! :D As for this ficlet, I miss Edvy and writing it. So...here ya go!

"Is...this everything?"

"Yes, brother, I'm almost sure."

"How much time do we have?"

"Twenty minutes."

A sense of urgency raced through State Alchemist, Edward Elric, as he escorted his younger brother, Alphonse, towards the front of the supermarket. A line of check-out lanes and cashiers spread out before the two. As Edward scanned the lines, he noticed that each line seemed long.

Except one.

"C'mon, let's go there!" Edward pointed as he hurried forward. Skidding to a stop before the cashier, he began to hastily unload his things for check-out. It was only when he heard the snide remark from the cashier that he stopped and nearly dropped the box of tissues that he was holding.

"'Ey! If it ain't my favorite squirt, Edo!"

Edward looked up, hatred gleaming in his molten amber eyes. Standing before him in the supermarket's uniform and a brightly colored hat was the shape-shifter, Envy. The Homunculus was grinning widely at Edward from behind the cash register, obviously amused by how Edward was reacting.

"What are you doing here?"

"Working, of course!"

Edward stifled the growl that threatened to rumble from his throat. Envy, ignoring it, began to check things out until he stopped suddenly. He furrowed his brows and frowned. Edward, already annoyed, snapped impatiently.

"What is it?"

"This is the Express Lane, Edo," Envy explained. "That means no more than ten items."

"So?"

"You have eleven."

Edward blanched considerably before he felt the heat of frustration and anger boil beneath this skin. He thrust his arms out, exasperated.

"Can't you just ring me up? It's ONE ITEM OVER!"

Envy shook his head and placed a hand on his cocked hip. "Sorry, Chibicheeks, but no-can-do. My manager has the eyes of a hawk and if he catches me doing favors for friends, I'll be booted." The Homunculus thrust his thumb towards the door, gesticulating where he'd end up if he checked Edward out with eleven items. Edward slammed his hands down.

"Look! Firstly, we're not friends! Never have been, never will be! Secondly, it's just one damn item!"

Envy sighed and shook his head. "Sorry, but I can't do it. Either go to another check-out line or put an item back."

But oh no, Edward wouldn't have that. Not from this shape-shifting doppleganger. He began to yell.

"SINCE WHEN IN HELL DO YOU FOLLOW RULES, ENVY!"

"Claude."

"WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN?"

"My name is Claude, here, Shrimp."

"THAT HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS?"

"Sure it does. You called me by the wrong name; this is my alias while at work. Get it right."

The two fussed for thirty minutes when Alphonse noticed the time. They had to be back at work immediately. He tapped Edward on the shoulder.

"WHAT?" Edward growled. Al held a hand up in surrender.

"It's time to go..brother."

Envy watched on with a smirk, his hand back on his hip. Edward noticed the time and groaned loudly. People stood by and watched the scene as Edward snatched up the cat food (much to Al's protests), slammed it on a nearby shelf, stomped back and shot Envy a humiliated and hateful glare.

"Happy now?"

"Very."