Richard was watching her. He was always watching her. At first she had found it endearing, but after nearly three months it was beginning to get annoying. It had gotten to the point where he wouldn't let her do anything without lecturing her on one of the medical studies he had read, or consulting a website. Most women dream of a man being this involved she thought to herself, but in all honesty she found it constricting. He watched what she ate, what she didn't eat, how often she ate, whether she felt sick, how many times she went to the bathroom, how much exercise she did, even how much she drank. Alcohol had been banned outright much to her annoyance. It wasn't that she even wanted it, she just felt that it should be up to her as to whether she should be drinking it or not. In its place Richard plied her with water to keep her hydrated. She had found herself increasingly trying to sneak past him at home, once carrying a contraband load of laundry that she was determined to put in the washing machine. Needless to say he had caught her and taken care of it himself, telling her to rest.

She seemed incapable of escaping his gaze, even for a moment. But the truth was that Richard was watching her so carefully because he was trying to work out an opportune moment to ask her to marry him. It had been going through his head almost since the day he had found out about the baby. His baby. He still could scarcely believe it. A family. Two more than he ever thought he would have, or deserved.

To say that it was her pregnancy that made him think of marriage was a vast understatement. If he was honest then he would admit to having dreamt of being able to ask her since before they were even together. He had often fantasised about coming home to her after a busy day at work, kissing her and their children hello, never once believing that it might be a possibility, so had continued to draw the loneliness of the shack around him like a comfort blanket, shutting out everything and everyone. Even after he had finally plucked up the courage to ask her to dinner and found that she was a very willing participant in their relationship, he had convinced himself that marriage to her would have been selfish. He knew it would have made him happier than he had ever thought possible but he wasn't foolish enough to believe that her being tied to him would ever stop her from leaving when she grew tired of it just being the two of them.

Now though, things were different. He felt a new depth in their relationship, something that hadn't been there before. The fact that she found him tiresome and eminently annoying had become apparent to Richard almost from the moment he had accepted her pregnancy. He knew he fussed over her too much and that she hated it, but he also knew that she accepted it as part of who he was, given what he had gone through and that she would worry that he was withdrawing from her if he ever stopped.

Hiding it from people at work had been difficult. It wasn't that he wasn't used to withholding things from colleagues, he was, but this was different. This was deliberately withholding the truth, something that he had never been very good at and his acting initially left a lot to be desired. Giddy, was perhaps the only word that could be used to describe him in those first days and Dwayne had shamelessly taken advantage of his good mood, arriving even later than usual to work in the morning with a hangover that had made it impossible for him to function properly. But Richard hadn't cared, even allowing music at the station, but drawing the line at going for drinks with them after work. He had ensured that Camille had also declined.

It had taken every fibre of his being not to constantly look at her in the office, not to run his hands over her, imagining the mass of cells inside her growing bigger as every second passed. As a result the hours spent out of work revolved even more around Camille than they had before. He needed to be with her at every possible opportunity, he wanted her to know that he wasn't going anywhere.

He could sense her restlessness.

"Are you alright?" She nodded. "What is it?"

"Nothing."

"Camille?"

"It's nothing. It's stupid."

"Oh well if it's stupid then don't tell me."

She huffed. "I don't want to tell you because if I do then you'll panic."

"I won't panic. You just said it was stupid."

"You will, you'll panic and then you'll worry that I'm not happy."

"I won't..."

"I just feel..." Richard willed her to go on with his eyes. "I just feel fat." Her last statement was said with a certain amount of embarrassment, as if she knew it was wrong to admit it but she still wanted to tell someone. "I feel so fat all the time." She looked at Richard who by now was mute with astonishment at her revelation.

"But you're not fat you're pregnant."

"I know I'm pregnant Richard, it doesn't stop me from feeling fat." Her frustration was beginning to boil over.

"Would you rather be thin than pregnant?" He looked dejected and confused.

"No, of course not! See this is why I didn't want to tell you. You don't understand."

"Of course I understand"

"No you don't, because you don't think I'm fat."

"Because you're not fat. You're beautiful."

"Oh God don't tell me I'm beautiful, that's like saying I'm glowing." He looked as though he was about to say something. "Don't tell me I'm glowing!" She grabbed the flesh around her waist. "Look at it Richard! I don't even look pregnant. People just look at me and assume I'm fat. I'm enormous. I'm hideous. Even my boobs are enormous."

"Ah now that's definitely not a bad thing." Richard was much quicker to step in this time when pronouncing judgement. She glared at him and he realised what he had said. "Not that they weren't perfect before, they were. Obviously they were. It's just now, you know, they're um...much bigger." He hadn't explained himself very well and he knew it. Camille continued to glare at him and he realised that he needed to make another effort to salvage the situation. "Camille, I love you, and I love the way you look now, more than the way you looked before you were pregnant, because you're pregnant. He took both her hands. This is it he thought to himself. I'm going to propose. "You are so beautiful and I love that no one knows. It's just us and the bump." He was on the verge of sliding out of his chair on to his knees when she cut in.

"And maman." The moment was gone.

"Yes," he replied grudgingly, "and your mother."

She huffed a little. "Can't we start telling other people now? I'm sure they all know anyway."

"How would they know?"

"Oh come on Richard, it's so obvious, you won't let me do anything." The dejected look was back and she tried to backpedal. Her face softened a little. "It's sweet that you want to protect me, but I know what my body can cope with more than you do." He still looked as though he didn't know what she was talking about. "You didn't even let me fill up the kettle today. Stop treating me like I'm going to break." The message was beginning to get through, she could see him looking a little embarrassed. "Look, all I'm saying is that I am perfectly capable of carrying a tray of tea without any help. If on the other hand I need to get the Land Rover bonnet open, then that's something I could do with some help on...Ok?" He nodded and she seemed to realise that she had taken her mood out on him.

"I'm sorry." He shrugged. "I'm just tired. I'm so tired all the time."

He pulled her into his lap. "Can I do anything? Why don't you go to bed for a rest, I'll make dinner."

Her temper was beginning to flare up again. "I don't want to go to bed Richard. I'm not sleepy. I just want to stop being tired. I want to be able to do things for myself again." She paused long enough to get her temper back under control again. "I know you want to help and you are, it's just, this is obviously new for both of us and I feel like I have so much pressure to get it right for you. If anything happens then it's my fault, I know it is, but at the same time you have to trust that I'm not going to go bungee jumping or on a wild night out with my friends. But, if I want to go to the bar and have a beer then I should be allowed to do that...equally if I want a water or a coffee then I should be allowed that too, I need to choose, not you."

He nodded mutely and she kissed him. They sat in silence, a rare moment of peace between them, her head resting against his chest, his arms encircling her.

"I don't really want to tell anyone you know. I just get so bored of not being able to do things and I know when we finally get around to telling people they're all going to butt in."

"I know."

"I just want to get it over with. I want them to know and then for them to leave us alone.

"I know, and they will. But for now it's just us, isn't that better?" She nodded.

"I suppose so. I just want the whole thing to hurry up. I want to look pregnant. This whole time nothing's happened, I haven't felt sick, I haven't had any cravings, and I know that's a good thing, but sometimes I wonder if anything's actually going on in there. Even the fact that I feel fat doesn't prove that I'm pregnant."

Richard reached up and cupped her breast. "Oh I think there are certain things that prove you're pregnant."

She tried to wriggle away from his hand. "Richard they're so enormous, and so disgusting."

"They are certainly not disgusting." He said smiling, drawing her into another kiss. "Are you sure you don't want to go to bed."

"I told you I'm not sleepy."

"That's not what I asked."

"Oh?"

"No." His hand was more insistent now and he had wormed his way under her shirt, rubbing his thumb over the bump in her bra where her nipple was.

"Only if you're sure it won't hurt the baby..." She was being sarcastic even he knew that. He narrowed his eyes at her and she giggled, slipping off his lap and pulling him to his feet.

Perhaps this pregnancy thing wasn't so bad after all.