by Megan Auffart
For those who are wondering exactly what I am smoking, this is actually a Christmas Card story that I wrote last year. Replace your friend's name with Harrison Ford and adjust the storyline slightly to fit your friend's ethnicity and there you have it! The perfect Christmas Card Story ! It is important, however, that NO ONE STEALS THIS! This is one of my favorite creations and if you feel you must use this in your Christmas cards, please ask me my permission first and wait for me to grant it.
Plus, it pretty much proves how God's plan is WAYYYY too complex for me to ever figure out. Hehe, I love writing weird religious stories!
And thank you to all the people who informed me that it was the Gulf War and not the Golf War. :c) I have corrected my error.
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In Virginia during the Gulf War, a Mr. Tadfield of Orangebrook Lane received a letter in his mailbox one pleasant Sunday morning. Contained within the letter was an abridged copy of God's Plan. According to what Mr. Tadfield read, the reason why Shakespeare had been born was not to write plays; instead his whole purpose in life was to offer a beggar a few pence on his way to the theater. Because the beggar could afford to buy a local tavern wench a few cups of mead, his family line continued to reproduce and, eventually, Harrison Ford would be born. As to why this was important the letter didn't say, for the paper had been torn half-way and any information that might have clarified the purpose of Harrison Ford's existence was lost. Mr. Tadfield threw the letter away later that afternoon and the second half of the abridged version of God's Plan hasn't been seen since.