Pairing/s: Merlin/Arthur, Gwaine/Percy
Character/s: Merlin, Arthur, Gwaine, Percy
Warnings: strong language
Disclaimer: Merlin characters are the property of Shine and BBC. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.

"Pass the popcorn, Perce." Gwaine didn't even look at Percy, just held out one hand, and before you could say Bob's-your-uncle, hot, buttery popcorn appeared in his palm. Grunting out his thanks, he shoveled the lot into his mouth. "Think they'll ever…" Gwaine swallowed, then snickered as he said, "fuck?"

Beside him, Percy let out a snort, then Gwaine could hear a bit of popcorn crunching before Percy said, "Ummm, I put my bet down at a week from now. And you?"

Gwaine nodded toward the pair of idiots shouting at each other in the distance. "Nah, I'm thinking tonight. For fucketty fuck's sake, look at them."

And it was a sight to behold. Arthur's face was red and there was a cord on his neck popping out that Gwaine could see from yards away. There was flailing and screeches and it was a wonder that neither Arthur nor Merlin had hit each other – yet – with all that energy vibrating between them. Merlin was waving his arms like a mad thing, in all his gangly glory, and Arthur wasn't far behind with fists in the air, and the hot glares the two were sending each other were technicolor bright and hot as hell.

Gwaine shoved more popcorn in his mouth, Perce protesting that they'd run out if Gwaine kept it up. But Gwaine just laughed, letting little bits of buttery goodness tumble out. "I'd give them an hour, maybe less at this rate."

"If they don't kill each other first." Percy was being entirely too reasonable.

Then Gwaine laughed and pointed as Arthur, the git's shrieks increasing by the moment, caught hold of Merlin's shirt, shaking him.

Merlin jerked back, squawking at Arthur, and in a train-wreck kind of way, Gwaine watched as most of Merlin's shirt tore to bits, a large piece of it wrapped in Arthur's hands. Beside him, Percy choked a little, then snickered.

Gwaine thought Merlin looked pretty good half-naked, but clearly Merlin wasn't having it. Although yards away, Gwaine could hear Merlin shouting, "That's my best shirt. You're going to pay for it, you prat."

Even in the fading light, Gwaine could tell that Arthur was appalled by what had happened. The mortified look on his face was fucking hilarious and Gwaine made a mental note to mock him at some future point, maybe at Arthur and Merlin's wedding – if they finally got their collective heads out of their arses and admitted their feelings before they murdered each other.

But obviously, Arthur wasn't going to admit any kind of error, he was a gormless arse after all. His scowl was impressive, even from a distance. "It wasn't my fault, idiot. Your shirts are crap."

"Well, if you hadn't grabbed it like that." Merlin reached out, pulling at the remnants of his shirt in Arthur's hands, but Arthur just held on. "Let go, you wanker."

"Make me. If you can." From where he was sitting, Gwaine could see the smug look on Arthur's face. Always up for a challenge, the knob, but Merlin wasn't having any of it.

Instead of yanking his shirt away from Arthur, he shoved forward, and pulled at Arthur's button-down. But Arthur's shirt was made of sturdier stuff, and as Arthur stepped back, the momentum of the fight intensified. Tangled up in legs and arms and failure, the two idiots tumbled to the ground, and then began to roll around, snarling and tearing and shouting insults.

Beside him, Percy was full-out giggling. And Gwaine couldn't let this opportunity pass. Taking out his cellphone, he started filming the pair, watching as they shredded what remained of their shirts, rolling around in the grass, stains and clots of dirt smearing across their now-naked chests.

Gwaine couldn't have planned it better himself and that was saying a lot. Arthur and Merlin managed to get filthy, still screeching about everything and nothing, when they should have been shagging each other's brains out instead.

Then suddenly, Arthur was on top. Not unexpectedly as he was stones heavier than Merlin, but he had both of Merlin's arms tight above his head, and the shouting had quieted a bit, too.

Merlin gave a great heave but he couldn't shove Arthur off.

But it was Arthur's face that left Gwaine hot and not a little excited. Even at this distance, Gwaine could see that there was hunger there and longing and lust. And Merlin must have seen it, too. He stopped wiggling, then slowly, deliberately, rolled his hips up.

There was no more shouting, no more insults. Instead, everything seemed to quiet as Arthur leaned down, his mouth hovering just above Merlin's. And then there was snogging and a lot more rolling and hands busy as hell.

Gwaine was getting hot and bothered just watching them both, and he didn't even realize that he'd stopped filming until Percy leaned over and took the phone from him.

Then Percy nuzzled Gwaine's ear, breathed into it, "Those two will be at it a while. How about we go inside and act out our own little scenario?"

That was a damn fine idea. Gwaine smiled up at him, then nodded and let Perce pull him up. "As long as I get to be on top this time." Percy sent him a sideways glance that spoke volumes about just how it was going to go and Gwaine being on top wasn't even in the cards, at least during the first round.

As if Gwaine cared. As long as when they were done, they were both exhaustingly satisfied, it would be all to the good.

But Gwaine couldn't let Percy have the last word. Smug and triumphant, he said, "I won the bet."

Percy just shook his head, his smile growing hot and intense. "That you did. But I'm going to reap the reward."

Oh, yes, Gwaine would make sure Perce would be rewarded, again and again.

And tomorrow, he'd post the video of Arthur and Merlin rolling around in the grass to their nearest and dearest. Because those kind of things needed to be shared and what else were friends for!

The end.