Follow the Script
A/N: This is pure crack. It will probably continue but I've got other stories to attend to so don't expect an update anywhere or anytime soon. I DO play Maple Story(duh) so if anybody wants to talk to me, they can. Just please, don't pressure me to write ingame too, I get enough of that . . I'm sick of doing detailed stories that captivate the reader too much. Fanfiction(and online games) are my vacation away from my serious stories that could possibly turn out to be awesome novels if I could focus on them(mind you I use them for school instead). No, my stories are NOT on fanfiction, they're just school writing assignments acknowledged by my school's faculty. It's kinda sad though...I don't like writing all that much XP. I'm just really good at it DX.
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In a land once ruled by the monstrosities known as man, one boy stepped up to the plate and...
"Hey! That ain't in the script, stupid! Stop reading your crapload of baseball mangas and get serious, will ya?" A boy shouted from across the room. His name was ActorBoy. Of course, his director, PollyShores who was a good friend of his, wouldn't follow the script correctly. He felt that it needed spice, whilst having ActorBoy wanting it to stay the way it was. He liked the drama and the awesomely dramatic scenes where he saved damsels in distress from the evil, corrupted ways of mankind. However, PollyShores thought that the script needed humor, not just drama. Drama was sick to him, it was like, to him, a romance scene without the romance. He liked the comedy, the crack jokes that were so stupid they were funny. That was the only element, in his opinion, that was missing from this stage performance. If you locked PollyShores in a room with drama videos all around the room on endless replay, in the next MINUTE you would see that he had already fainted in attempts to escape, to commit suicide, or to just plain destroy every running television set, video playing monitor, and video camera in the room. Then afterwards make his escape.
"Actor, don't you think this story needs some sugar once in awhile? It's got the spice, but it doesn't have any sugar! There's nothin' to sweeten the deal! The comedy attracts audiences of all ages! Doesn't matter how graphic it gets afterwards! C'mon, please?" Moments of silence passed before he got an answer. But it wasn't just a plain yes.
"Fine..."
"YESH!"
"BUT!"
"But what?"
"But, you have to come to my house afterwards and watch a drama with me that I've been dying to watch for ages now." Polly almost thought of refusing the deal, but then he thought of the possibilities. He might find a way to escape the menacing drama before it even began, or before he even got to the house! That's what he would do! He would escape!
"You've got a deal!"
"Great! Just so you know, even if you've got a super awesomely important thing you've got to do, I'll just postpone the video until you're done, otherwise force you there otherwise."
"...Then I'll jus---"
"Nuh uh! No longer able to break the promise Polly! You gotta go now!"
"Shit! Oh well, I guess I deserve it...NOT. Can we just get on with the story?"
"Yeah, go ahead."
Ahem, one boy stepped up to the plate and took a swing at saving the world. Although the evil mutant pigs had not yet returned from the winter's slumber, the world was still endangered by the baseball players from Battanic. Chotaro, the hero, quickly ran around his house in excitement as he was about to get his first tooth pulled out. He got excited about everything, his first time in the bathroom, his first time accidentally takin' a dump in his diapers, his first blink, and second, and third, his first birthday party, and his second, and his third, and so on, his first toy, his first day of life, his first word, which was inevitably 'shit' because his parents said it alot when his first anything came, the first word he heard out of anybody's mouth, and such. Yes, he was a stupid boy, because he always fell flat on his face for no apparent reason. And--
"HEY! What the HELL are you doin' makin' my character look like crap?!?"
"It's part of the script! See! Look, right here. Passage 4 through 7 has the whole introduction about you and how your character is a total loser!"
"This bites man! The hell with this! Forget the deal cuz I'm not gonna be in this stupid performance!" The said furious actor shouted in blind rage before taking his hat and throwing it to the floor.
"But I need at least one actor to play all 785 parts!"
"Too bad! Find someone else!" Then, after the furious actor had gone, Polly stood alone in the dark auditorium. He didn't know what to do. Actor had always been there for him but right now, he REALLY needed him and he wasn't there. What had he done to deserve this?!? Well, technically he did plenty, but let's not push it, okay? Still standing alone, Polly soon left the auditorium, only to bump into someone.
"I'm sorry..." Polly started, rubbing his head ever so lightly to keep his hair from being destroyed completely. He looked up to see a woman standing before him, dressed in clothing that showed signs of noobiness. She was there to audition for the part.
"You're perfect!" Polly shouted in ecstacy. That week they practiced til dawn, then it was time for the all important performance. Everybody was ready to see one awesome play while ActorBoy was sitting in annoyance with his girlfriend, waiting to see who took his place. As the curtains began unfurling, some sort of bang was heard and the noob girl was dead. Polly ran up to his lost actor and yelled out the longest stretched 'no' in the whole maple world. That's when, jumping up from the stands, was Sherlock Holmes, in Maple story character format of course, who already began to investigate the case. Polly kept watching Sherlock Holmes, still not knowing that Actor had pulled out a sniper rifle and shot the noob with awesome accuracy in the forehead. Of course, in the end, he was caught by the awesome Sherlock Holmes and sent to jail.
"Damn you Sherlock Holmes! I would've gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you F$#ing D#$#ed Detective Sh$#bag!! To Hell with you!!!"
"That was waaaaaay off script dude!" Sherlock Holmes suddenly said, the police looking at him like he was crazy. Sherlock Holmes was a gentleman detective and never said "dude" and never stretched his words. Only emphasized them. The rest of them lived in complete serenity until ActorBoy was soon released from jail and was, once again, on a killing rampage. His first target, Sherlock Holmes, in which he would kill with a magnifying glass. It suited him well. Then he would kill Polly by making him watch a bunch of corny dramas. Yeah, he had it all planned out, unti he suddenly got stabbed by Polly, who had Sherlock's head on a stick. Polly then hid the evidence and since Sherlock was dead, there was nobody to stop him.
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Corny ending, corny story. But that's how I escape seriousness and the people who praise me too much. NO AWESOMELY AWESOME PRAISES PLEASE! I know you guys wouldn't do that since this story sucks, but if you plan on torturing me, you may do anything EXCEPT use an awesome praise. It DOESN'T DESERVE PRAISE!!