I need you.
That's what you don't understand. You think it's just another game but it's not. I need you. You've told me a thousand times that I'm just being childish and that I need to just stop.. But you don't understand. I can't stop...
Why wont you just give me a chance...
I didn't get up this morning...I really didn't have a reason to. None of the others really paid any attention to me anymore, they were just glad I was leaving them alone. I tossed and turned for an hour or so, failing to fall back asleep. I didn't want to face the day...again, I didn't have a reason to, but I had to.
Forcing myself out of bed, I made my way down into the kitchen, surprised to see everyone was gone.
Except for Li.
He glanced up from his book when he heard me walk in the room, before quickly turning back to it. I missed him.
'Please talk to me...Even if it's just one word...' He hadn't spoken to me in weeks... His words dug into me, killing any chance of smiling the same again. "You're just being a child. You haven't changed at all. It's no wonder everyone ignores you." He's right...
I promised myself I'd change.. That..if I did...he'd talk to me again.. He..he's my only friend and I don't want to lose him.. Even if it means dealing with the fact, well, I love him.
Yeah, I love him, and that's why he was so mad at me...no, he wasn't mad, he was disappointed. He was disappointed...but I don't know why. All I know is that he wants nothing to do with me...a child...
I skipped breakfast for probably the third day in a row, moving myself into the next room, just like every other day. I picked a nice spot and found a book. Yes, a book. Not a video game, or my laptop, a book. I would change for him, even if it killed me.
I had become wrapped up in the book, I didn't notice Li come in. I didn't notice him until he had sat next to me, blinking at me in confusion. "What...are you doing?" I jumped a bit, startled by his voice. Quickly plastering on the signature smile, I beamed up at him. "Reading a book, da-ze~!" The unamused look still rested on his face, showing he saw through the smile "But you don't read." I just shrugged him off, trying to hide the knot in my stomach, and the growing tears. Every word he spoke was bitter, I wanted my Li back.. The soft spoken, careful one, the only person who cared about me.. I wanted my best friend back. I felt a tear slide off my cheek, hitting the book that now rested in my lap. "Im..." His voice sounded worried, I was glad he was caring again but I didn't want to get called a child again. I lifted my sleeve to my eyes, drying the tears. "I'm fine. Only little kids cry. I'm not a little kid, I'll be fine." as I spoke, my voice cracked. Tears wouldn't stop falling.
I am a little kid...
I do cry.
I didn't want to lose him...but if I was going to..I wanted him to know he'd always be my best friend..
Tears fell hard, staining everything they touched. I held my head up, looking him in the eyes for the first time in nearly a month. "I..I know you hate me...and you'll never talk to me again, because I'm just a little kid...but...but I'm okay with that...Because it's what you want and I want you to be happy..but...before you fully shut me out.. Can I just have one last hug? So I can just...pretend someone cares about me?" I didn't expect a hug, I didn't even expect him to take me seriously. Half excepting to get hit with a nearby book, I turned away, finally letting the tears flow freely.
I felt soft arms wrap around my shoulders, and a soft voice filled with tears whisper "I'm sorry."
He never cried, he never even showed any emotion, and now he was hugging me, crying... I quickly wrapped my arms around him, feeling even worse for hurting him this much.
"I didn't mean to upset you..I'm sorry... I just wanted my best friend back... I...I'm sorry I love you, okay? I'll get over it." I felt his head shake against my shoulder, followed by a muffled 'no.' His warm brown eyes met mine, a smile crept onto his face. He moved himself closer, resting in my lap, as his lips moved to meet mine. A kiss of a life time, finally.
Tears had began to form again, wondering if this was all a trick. A rare smile still stood on his lips, his forehead resting against mine. His now inviting voice spoke against my lips.
"Children don't read books."
