When Darcy's words appeared, she'd known her soulmate was going to be someone special. As she aged, and read over the words, again and again, she wondered who it could be that would ask her something quite so peculiar.
It didn't worry her. Darcy had her own set of quirks, and rather appreciated her soulmate for their strange, if fucked up, manner of greeting.
After all 'I promise I'm only pretending to kidnap you, and by the way, do you like burritos?' was far better than any other generic means of saying hello.
Even if she wasn't sure she ever wanted to be kidnapped, pretend or not.
At least Darcy like burritos.
In the weeks following the awful 'Avengers Civil War' debacle, Jane and Darcy discretely stayed out of Stark's way while he nursed his wounds. Darcy took to leaving him coffee in odd places, and hoped that it cheered him up. Jane fretted, and was generally useless, but Darcy figured, it was the thought that counted, right?
However, things were still tense in the tower, especially during the evenings, when what had once been boisterously loud team dinners had become silent, awkward affairs. Darcy had taken to going on early evening walks, and setting herself an aim of eating in a different café each night.
Someone had allowed Jane to make her own coffee, and so Darcy had walked into the lab at seven to find Jane buzzing around in circles, and making absolutely no progress at all. It had taken Darcy three hours to coral Jane out of the lab and into bed, and Darcy hadn't eaten a thing since lunch time.
She was hungry. No. She was hangry, a complicated balance of hungry and angry achieved when all you really want is some food on your plate, and you want it right fucking now.
Darcy stalked out of Avengers Tower, if it could even be called that any more, and down the street. She shoved her earphones in, and turned up the music, following the Google Maps directions to the café of today.
She wasn't paying any attention to where she was going, which was how she walked into an alley, and found herself with a gloved hand against her mouth, pulling her into a van. She screamed, naturally.
"I promise I'm only pretending to kidnap you, and by the way, do you like burritos?" her kidnapper asked.
"It better be the best fucking burrito of my life," Darcy snarled. She turned, and came face to face with James Barnes, who was staring gormlessly back at her. He reached out, and snatched something from the front seat, offering it to her with a sheepish expression.
It was a burrito. She took it.
"So… why are you pretending to kidnap me?" she asked. She took a bite of the burrito while she waited for his reply. It was good. Her hanger was abated, for the moment.
"Ah," Barnes said. "Ah, um, I mean, shit."
Darcy arched a brow. Barnes flushed. He ran his artificial hand through his hair. It was different to the one she'd seen him use on TV, but then the man she was looking at was definitely James Barnes, ally, not Winter Soldier, enemy.
"Steve wants a status update on Tony and figured you were the best person to talk to because Romanoff is giving all of them the silent treatment and of course he can't ask Tony," Barnes blurted out.
"Hmm," Darcy said. "And does he want a status update on me? Or Jane?"
The gormless look reappeared on Barnes' face. Then he scoffed, and shook his head.
"You're really something, ya know? Got me all twisted up."
She smirked.
"Hello darling, my name is James Barnes, and you are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen, and coincidentally, my soulmate."
"Darcy Lewis, but I suspect you already knew that, seeing as you kidnapped me," Darcy said. James winced, but shrugged his shoulders.
"Couldn't be helped," he said.
Darcy finished her burrito with a lick of her lips that made James' eyes darken. She withdrew her business card, her mobile number included, and gave it to James.
"I haven't decided what I'm eating dinner for tomorrow, so text me where and when, and then, perhaps, I'll consider giving you that status update," she said.
James took the card with an easy smile.
"And it better not be anywhere I've eaten at before," she informed him.
James groaned. "You don't make it easy, do ya?"
Darcy grinned. "Thanks for the burrito."
Behold! My stupid addition to the endless list of Darcy/Bucky fics out there, because damn there are so many. Also, hangry is totally a word. You want to know my secret? I'm always hangry.
By the way, the first mention of burritos on a US menu was in the 1930s, in LA. Think about what that means for young Bucky, growing up with the hilarious soul mark 'it better be the best fucking burrito of my life', desperate to know exactly what a burrito is - a sexual act, a piece of jewellery, a drink?
