Loyola
I sighed as I walked into my new first period class. Each semester our school, Carl Schurz High School, reassigns our classes, letting us chose more electives. I'm sure that's lovely if you're not named after a school. Particularly a school that's not too far off from where said student with the strange name.
Every time, without fail at roll call e teacher reads off the namesJames Woods, Emily Sprague, Megan Kluskens oh what a unique last name dear, Max Lann, Kevin Michal, Loyola Smith? Oh what an, umm, unique name dear, are you planning to attend Loyola? Ha Ha! No? Ah, you should consider it I'm sure they would love to have you, dear are you mute? No? Ok, Sean Franklin, Alana Finley?
I really dislike this conversation, mostly because I'm what is dubbed by my sister as mother F***ing serious people issues, really I just don't like people that much, I like plants more, or wineries, or really anything.
Alban
I'm pretty sure naming your child after St. Alban should qualify as child abuse, especially if that child is a god dammed girl.
But no, my mom thought it was a fucking delightful name, but on the bright side I'm not named Harvard like my step-dad Maxwell wanted to name me. He got to name Loyola though so that's the story behind her name. Mines that my mom was on page 150 of Washington: Magnificent capital. After hearing that I was very glad that she wasn't reading something like a medical dictionary, for all I know I could have been named gallbladder, and we all know the guys are just lining up to date Gallbladder Smith.
And that would have made roll call a hell of a lot worse, but can you imagine the teacher's looks when you ask them to call you bladder for short.
Shakespeare
Guess who got theater as an elective?
That's right, the only kid in the school and possibly the country who's named after a dead playwright who couldn't even spell his own name!
But on the bright side I didn't get Ms. Herecat, she's the creative writing teacher and is insane, like write an essay on how you would kill someone crazy.
I really hope I have someone with a really wired name in my class, like in math I had a boy named Jesus Christo, I made the assumption that he was christian but silly me he's Jewish (I'm sorry but if your name is Mary, your husband is named Joseph and you name your child Jesus no one is going to assume your jewish so you really shouldn't act offended If I assume your child is Christian, nothing against Jews though, seeing as I am one).
However my screw up wasn't nearly as bad as Ms. Wilburn's. She went through roll and after asking me if I enjoyed being an illiterate thief of writing she asked if his mother was virgin Mary (No) and then asked if his mother cheated on Joseph with a guy named God (I mean come on, I'm an ADHD kid who drinks too much coffee and even I don't ask that).
She's been fired since then.
Anyway, hope springs eternal for roll call.