AN I wrote this when I was feeling a little down. It's four chapters. I'll upload the
next tomorrow. Hope you like it.
Disclaimer: don't own them. Don't make me more down than I already am.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The first time I laid eyes on you I immediately hated your guts. Your smirk was
too proud, your manners too arrogant. You seemed to think your looks alone were enough
to make every woman go all starry eyed.
Well, not me. You were surprised when you found your charms not having any effect
on me. Oh, the times we quarreled. I hated you. I hated you for the ability to outwit me
in everything, though come to think of it, I gave as good as I got. Like when I had
somehow sneaked into your rooms unnoticed to put green ink in your hair. You looked
ridiculous for days.
Now all I can do, is wish for those days to return. To wish for the innocence
that seemed to lay a sparkling sheen over those times. We were like children, ignorant
of what was coming to us. We simply enjoyed the days, even though I spend them shouting
at you at the top of my lungs, when I wasn't planning something horrible to inflict on
you.
The times I cursed you for making my life so miserable. I take it back. I take
it all back! Just return to me. Return to the way you were. Smirking, strutting and
blowing my mind with your kisses. And alive.
Why? Why did Beryl have to be so strong? Why couldn't you fight her? Why couldn't I
help you? Psychic powers are my name! I should have been able to help you! But I couldn't
even help my princess.
Oh, Jadeite, if things would have been different.
I loved you senseless those days. Well, maybe not all of them. We were much like
our prince and princess were nowadays. I wish you were here, so we could laugh at them
together.
I just wish you were here, no strings attached.
Always a piece of my heart has been missing. I have been trying to fill it with
school, friends, my work at the shrine. But only the sacred fire could give me a shred
of comfort. But when I found Usagi and Ami and became Sailor Mars, again, it seemed like
that space was filled. Everything made so much more sense.
But then I saw you. My enemy. I knew we had to fight you, but something inside
me told me it was wrong. That I shouldn't. That you shouldn't fight against us, but
alongside us.
I didn't understand. It confused me and again I sought comfort at the sacred
fire. But this time it could offer none.
Now I do understand. I know. I see my princess suffer, because she knows not how
her prince fares. Only one of you is left now. If only Endymion was awakened sooner. He
might have been able to pounce some sense in all of you. He always had a stubborn streak
and living as Chiba Mamoru only seemed to have aggravated it.
But no. We killed you. And now I cry.
I feel so guilty. If only I had known! Maybe I could have saved you, could have
had you by my side once again.
But who am I kidding. If the Queen didn't manage it, even with the Crystal, then
how could I possibly think my poorly developed powers could succeed where she failed?
There is nothing for me left anymore. I will simply have to move on. If only it
were that simple. It doesn't happen every day that you kill your love. For the second
time, no less. Of course we ended up killing each other then. Now, you didn't stand a
chance. Even against us poorly trained soldiers. We outnumbered you. And outmatched you.
You haunt me in my dreams. You invade my readings of the fire. Why won't you
leave my alone? You are a ghost of the past. Then why torture me like you do?
Or is it my own heart, punishing me for what I did?
next tomorrow. Hope you like it.
Disclaimer: don't own them. Don't make me more down than I already am.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The first time I laid eyes on you I immediately hated your guts. Your smirk was
too proud, your manners too arrogant. You seemed to think your looks alone were enough
to make every woman go all starry eyed.
Well, not me. You were surprised when you found your charms not having any effect
on me. Oh, the times we quarreled. I hated you. I hated you for the ability to outwit me
in everything, though come to think of it, I gave as good as I got. Like when I had
somehow sneaked into your rooms unnoticed to put green ink in your hair. You looked
ridiculous for days.
Now all I can do, is wish for those days to return. To wish for the innocence
that seemed to lay a sparkling sheen over those times. We were like children, ignorant
of what was coming to us. We simply enjoyed the days, even though I spend them shouting
at you at the top of my lungs, when I wasn't planning something horrible to inflict on
you.
The times I cursed you for making my life so miserable. I take it back. I take
it all back! Just return to me. Return to the way you were. Smirking, strutting and
blowing my mind with your kisses. And alive.
Why? Why did Beryl have to be so strong? Why couldn't you fight her? Why couldn't I
help you? Psychic powers are my name! I should have been able to help you! But I couldn't
even help my princess.
Oh, Jadeite, if things would have been different.
I loved you senseless those days. Well, maybe not all of them. We were much like
our prince and princess were nowadays. I wish you were here, so we could laugh at them
together.
I just wish you were here, no strings attached.
Always a piece of my heart has been missing. I have been trying to fill it with
school, friends, my work at the shrine. But only the sacred fire could give me a shred
of comfort. But when I found Usagi and Ami and became Sailor Mars, again, it seemed like
that space was filled. Everything made so much more sense.
But then I saw you. My enemy. I knew we had to fight you, but something inside
me told me it was wrong. That I shouldn't. That you shouldn't fight against us, but
alongside us.
I didn't understand. It confused me and again I sought comfort at the sacred
fire. But this time it could offer none.
Now I do understand. I know. I see my princess suffer, because she knows not how
her prince fares. Only one of you is left now. If only Endymion was awakened sooner. He
might have been able to pounce some sense in all of you. He always had a stubborn streak
and living as Chiba Mamoru only seemed to have aggravated it.
But no. We killed you. And now I cry.
I feel so guilty. If only I had known! Maybe I could have saved you, could have
had you by my side once again.
But who am I kidding. If the Queen didn't manage it, even with the Crystal, then
how could I possibly think my poorly developed powers could succeed where she failed?
There is nothing for me left anymore. I will simply have to move on. If only it
were that simple. It doesn't happen every day that you kill your love. For the second
time, no less. Of course we ended up killing each other then. Now, you didn't stand a
chance. Even against us poorly trained soldiers. We outnumbered you. And outmatched you.
You haunt me in my dreams. You invade my readings of the fire. Why won't you
leave my alone? You are a ghost of the past. Then why torture me like you do?
Or is it my own heart, punishing me for what I did?