Okay hello Guys! This is Thebadsun [Alwaysbtheir] if you hadn't realized I changed my penname but no worries. I know I made a lot of u panic because I wasn't writing and I haven't update in ages ! but like I said no worries I am still here on fan fiction ive just been busy with school and looking for a job etc etc and so yeah but don't worry I will be updating my stories soon [eventually] I haven't forgotten im planning them out I just need time to actually sit down and write ^^'" I also wrote a little note about what im doing and whether I will update or not on my profile etc etc so if u see I still haven't updated well just go to my profile.!

So anyhoo I wrote this little one shot for you guys to update u guys on what's been going on n that I have not left. I was also feeling a little ….. er lets say dark coughemocough haha while writing this but yeah I hope you guys enjoy and please review!

-thebadsun

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"Natsume.." she sighed his name
 "….I'm in love with him" she had realized this a long time ago….

But it couldn't go on, The Feeling of nothingness and emptiness inside of her. The Rage, the pain, the feeling of loneliness, that conflicted with all her other emotions. She didn't appreciate them, as a matter of fact; she didn't want them at all. Not anymore.

"Why?!" She asked herself silently as tears slid down her angelic face. The brunette sobbed silently in her cold, dark bedroom. She was stupid and she knew this. Why couldn't her heart listen to her brain, for just one moment? Why couldn't she just not feel nothing at all? That may have just solved the one simple problem.
Mikan looked up from her knees towards the window, she was in fetal position. Her back was leaning against her dark violet sheets. The sky, it couldn't have been any darker at the moment, she noted to herself. And the thunder, it couldn't have been anymore louder. Yet, she seemed to have found herself enjoying the raging weather outside.

She liked the way thunder struck any unknown item randomly and was loud. She liked the hard pitter patter sound of the rain that fell fast as if it were raining a million tiny bullets instead. They comforted her, the rain and thunder, because they were different, yet unstable. . Just like her emotions.
Sometimes Rain drizzled softly. Sometimes it poured down like hail. Thunder would always get its rage out though; that's what she liked about it, thunder never held itself back. It stroke loud, getting out all its rage and it struck anything getting it's anger out along the way ; then it starts getting quieter and quieter to silent. For it finally had calmed itself down, at least for the day.

"Emotions" Mikan thought to herself bitterly, "feelings" they were useless, just worthless. Why was she born with them? They were a hindrance, ever since she met him. But they were useless after all. What good would come of them? They were one sided feelings after all. He had a girlfriend. And she was done. She couldn't take it anymore. She wanted those feelings of "love" if that's what they were, to be gone, forever. She would appreciate that. Although somehow she knew, deep inside her, she rather hurt, than feel nothing at all.

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Okay so how was that? short i know but yeah...Tell me in a review! Okay? So I hope to see u guys soon !

So this is Thebadsun signing out!