AN: Alright ladies and gents... (giggles to self quietly) I decided to write a what if story involving our favorite Quins. I almost moved to Calgary when my dad was offered a job there oh about 14 years ago. Sadly Dad didn't take the job (though he seriously considered it) and over the past decade or so I've often wondered "what if" so I thought I might write something down and see how you all like it... enjoy and feedback is love. XoXo Speaking Slow

Prologue:

I hated being a teenager. Way too many things tend to get fucked up around that time, and as invincible as I truly wanted to believe I was, I was no different. Well, that was a lie. I was very different. At twelve, I realized I was gay. That sucked more than I knew anything to have sucked before and it stayed that way until I "fell in love" for the first time. I was 14 and she moved to town. We hated each other at first, but somehow got over it and became very close, very quickly. (I'm sure you see where this is going.) We ended up kissing and then one thing lead to another and before you know it, my best friend and I are lovers but won't acknowledge what's happening between us at all. A year and a half later, she ripped out my heart in front of the high school telling me that she "can't see you anymore because I'm not a dyke". Yup, that sucked worse than just being gay. Now I was heart broken, gay, and the whole school knew it. My life was over...

Until a month later and my father came home with great news. We were all moving. He'd gotten a job in Calgary and we were all going to be Canadians. Talk about a fresh start...

Ten years later...

"Damn it! Shit! Fuck this isn't going to work" I said as I was trying to carry a rather large box up the stairs to my new apartment. Why didn't this place have a fucking lift? I heard soft laughter behind me as I struggled with the offensive cardboard container.

"D'ya need some help with that?" a woman asked.

I dropped the box on the landing and turned to see who was talking. I wasn't prepared for seeing the person at all once I realized who it was. "Tegan?" I asked, unsure of myself. "Tegan Quin?"

Her face instantly broke out into that huge grin I used to love as a teen, back when we were in high school together.

"Holy shit! What? How the...? I haven't seen you in ages!" she exclaimed. "Let me help you with this stuff and we are so going to do some catching up."

Catching up? Wow, I knew moving to Vancouver was a good idea. When Tegan moved here, I knew about it, hell, I lived two houses down from her mother and saw her all the time, but I hadn't actually seen Tee or her sister in a long time. I have to admit that I always had a bit of a thing for her, even in school. She was so funny and sweet once you got to know her and got her talking. It didn't surprise me that they were now famous musicians either. Those girls could keep me riveted for hours when they were just practicing in the basement apartment of their mother's house. I couldn't believe it. Tegan fuckin Quin was helping me move into my new apartment. This was almost unreal.

Eight years earlier...

I watched in stunned silence as my two best friends practiced one of Tegan's songs. I was in a state of delirium and ecstasy.

"Gonna take you. To the end. Of tomorrow.

I will take you. To the end. Of my world.

I'm gonna fight for the right

To believe in myself.

I'm gonna fight for the right to release myself

Release my self in...

Rainbow shirt

Ribbed in acid looooove

And our lies are ribbed

In plastic love"

Oh God, I'm going to have to change my pants. The way they played and Tegan's voice when she started moaning her lyrics like that... I couldn't help it, they were amazing. It was so hard not to just stare open mouthed from across the room. Both of them were so fucking talented and funny and, oh my god they were sexy as fuck, but they didn't know I was gay so telling either of them that would just be dumb on my part. Not that i thought either of them would freak out, pretty sure they were both queer too(and good kissers) but I'm sure they just figured the make-out sessions were drunk and slutty moments.

I had gotten so distracted that I didn't realize they had stopped playing Here I am and started playing a different song. That is, until the guitars got quiet and all I could hear was Tegan growling out:

"Starin from a distance

Won't ya cum...

get a closer look

I can guarantee that lickin' the package ain't ever quite as good..."

I didn't notice that I was biting my lip and my breathing had gone ragged until...

Sara's laughter erupted and I heard her say, "Jonnie, you are sooooo fuckin busted!" Wait, what did she mean, "Busted? I asked.

"You're one of us. I knew it!" Sara squealed

"Ya know, you could've told us you're queer, we would still love you" Tegan said, grinning ear to ear.

"Uh, um well" I stuttered, face red and unsure of how to respond. "It never came up?" I said, doing my best to be adorable and not panic.

"Never came up? Never, not once?" Tegan teased, raising her eyebrow. "How about when we were laying on my bed that one time, making out and when I reached up your shirt you about fell off?"

"OR..." Sara continued "What about when we were dancing in that warehouse on your birthday and I told you I could give you a present you wouldn't forget?"

Okay, it had come up, a few times, but that was not the point. So it really WAS the point but I was not about to tell them not only was I a lesbian but I was also very attracted to the both of them and had I not been a chicken shit would have loved to sleep with either of my friends. Yeah, how do you bring THAT up in a casual conversation?