Chapter 1

"Alright, everyone! Let's get this meeting STARTED!"

Vice-captain Matsumoto Rangiku smacked the table at the front of the members of the Shinigami Woman's Association, her eyes gleaming with excitement. Once everyone, excepting Yachiru, was paying attention, Matsumoto turned to Nanao.

"Funds are down as usual, correct?" The bespectacled woman nodded curtly. Matsumoto grinned.

"Well," she said, sweeping her arms outward in what was meant to be a grand motion, "I have a brilliant—no, ingenious plan, that will reward us with much funds AND entertainment!" The busty red-head struck a "V for Victory" pose. "Seriously, I'm a genius."

"So, what is it?" Soi Fon asked tartly from her position next to the door, arms folded tightly and leaning against the wall.

"We," Matsumoto started, "are gonna have the shipping war to end all shipping wars." Yachiru waved her left hand in the air, as her right was occupied by the stick of a rather large purple lollipop that was currently residing in the small girl's mouth.

"Mwuuths ahh Thihipeng?" she asked, not bothering to remove the lollipop from her mouth before speaking.

"She asked what a 'shipping' is," Unohana chirped in helpfully, her mother-like skills apparently extending to understanding incoherent children incapable of proper manners.

Matsumoto nodded her thanks to the dark-haired captain before answering.

"Shipping is the belief that certain people should be together romantically," she stated. "When you place the two together, they form a 'pairing.'"

"Now, what we'll do first is make a 'Pairing Wheel,'" Matsumoto drew a rough estimation of a carnival wheel on the boar at the front of the room.

"Ooh!" Yachiru yelled, pointing at the well on the board, "I got a comb from one of those! Andthenigota—" Soi Fon shoved a cookie into the pink-haired girl's mouth, effectively silencing her.

"Continue," Soi Fon stated, keeping a steady stream of treats going into Yachiru's mouth. Matsumoto sweatdropped slightly before turning back to the board.

"Each segment will have a different, well known shinigami's name. We'll spin the wheel twice," she drew little swirly marks to simulate spinning, "and the two whose names were chosen will be written here." Matsumoto drew a little board next to the spinning wheel before adding another wheel.

"Then, we'll spin another wheel to determine the challenge that pairing must face."

Nanao raised her hand.

"So," she stated frankly, "we're essentially playing matchmaker to the famous people of Soul Society?"

"And Ichigo's crew," the busty red-head added, "there's no way I'm letting them out of the fun." Matsumoto paused. "And, yes, we are definitely playing matchmaker."

"where do the funds come from all of this?" Soi Fon asked, still shoveling treats into Yachiru's mouth.

"The betting, sake, and blackmail material of course!" Matsumoto smiled, "this is a competition as well. Whatever pair performs best in the challenges wins "Best Pairing," gets a week off from paperwork, and the couple gets promised to have a perfect relationship!"

Everyone started, amazement on their faces. "Promised a perfect relationship? How on earth will you make that happen?"

Matsumoto shrugged, "I bribed the author."

"The what?" The women all looked at the red-head in confusion.

She shifted a bit before answering, not wanting to unstabilize reality by explaining, "Uhh, I have...connections..."

"..."

Matsumoto coughed awkwardly, "Aaaanyways, what do you say? Shipping war?!"

"HAI, SHIPPING WAR!" they agreed, though with varying degrees of enthusiasm.

Matsumoto grinned evilly, "then, Soul Society's first official shipping war shall now—BEGIN!"

"HAI!"

.0.0.0.

Meanwhile, in Urahara's Shop...

Urahara dashed into the room, practically skipping with happiness. "Tessai, we need another batch of those new cameras, STAT!"

"May I ask what for?" Tessai asked as he got to work.

"Ooh, something juicy came up, and I don't want to miss any of it."

.0.0.0.

Meanwhile, in Hitsugaya's Office...

Hitsugaya Toshiro felt a shiver up his spine—odd, considering he used an ice-type zanpaktou and had never felt cold in his life. There was only one cause of this phenomenon, and he knew from experience that it was never good.

"Whatever Matusmoto's planning better not involve me, booze, or getting out of paperwork..." he mumbled.

Of course, it would be all three.

.0.0.0.

Meanwhile, in the Kurosaki household...

Ichigo bounced a rubber ball against his ceiling, waiting for someone to get kidnapped. Well, not specifically kidnapped, but he was waiting for something to happen. No hollows, no mysterious attacks, no recurring villains...

He was really bored.

And so he waited for something to happen...

A/N: Be careful what you wish for Ichigo!

Yay, a new fic! *dances* I hope this will be insane fun (for you and me), but first I would like some help from YOU GUYS! *points at you*

What pairings are they going to test? Which characters like what pairings? What will the challenges be? How long will the war go?

The very fate of the characters depends on it! Your reviews and PMs will greatly influence the story, so please feel free to write!

Thank you for reading, and I hope to see you again next time—when the real fun begins!

*bows*

-drawnoflife