Danny Messer was in a foul mood. The entire department knew. There were only a few people who had escaped the wrath of Messer today.
Usually when he was in a bad mood, so was his wife. But today there were only clear skies surrounding Lindsay Messer, by the end of the day the skies would be cloudy with exasperation, but for now they were clear. There was no reason for Danny to be in such a terrible state.
His life was looking good. He had two beautiful children at home. He had a beautiful wife. He had just been given a raise.
Hammerback had been the first victim. There he was, going about his usual business in the morgue. The girl on the table had been found in Central Park and judging from the state of her toes, she had been a ballet dancer. He had started to tell a story about a dancer he had once dated, when he was abruptly cut off by Danny.
"I don't got all day. Can I get a COD in the next hour?" He snarked.
"Sorry. COD is asphyxiation by strangulation." Danny had stormed out of the morgue before the word "strangulation" was finished. Hammerback sighed. He had a fairly good idea why Danny was in a bad mood. He suspected that Danny probably wasn't getting any.
Adam had been the second victim of the attack. It was during a coffee room chat with Hammerback that Adam relayed that he figured that Danny probably wasn't getting any.
The third victim of Hurricane Messer was Stella. During the interrogation of a suspect in their latest case, Danny had strong armed the interrogation and proceeded to make the suspect cry. Jessica West was Danny's fourth victim. Jessica had known a lot of men, emphasis on a lot, and she knew that men only got like that when they weren't getting any. She told Stella as much when she walked her to the entrance of the precinct.
Flack was victim number five. He had been prepared for the attack, because Stella had informed him that Danny was on a rampage. She had also informed him that the reason for his bad mood was likely that he wasn't getting any. He may have been prepared, but he still took a beating.
Lindsay Messer wasn't technically a victim. She had been on the receiving end of Danny's cold shoulder. But Lindsay wasn't deaf. She had heard the whispers going around the lab, and she had become more exasperated as the day had gone on. So when Mac approached her late in the day, she had heard enough.
"Lindsay, do yo—" Mac started, but was cut off by Lindsay.
"Yes, I know Danny is in a bad mood. And before you ask, yes he's getting some. Trust me, he's getting some." She said without even turning to look at the speaker.
"Alright. I just wanted to know if you had gotten anything off of the vic's clothing." Mac said, his expression never wavering.
"Mac!? I'm sorry, I thought you were Flack." Lindsay whipped around with an embarrassed flush on her face.
"Happens all the time. Maybe you should take a break, find your husband. I'm sure we'll all work better."
"Sure. I'll just…go." Lindsay quickly fled the room.
Lindsay found her husband in their office doing paperwork. She walked in and leaned against the door frame for a minute.
"Are you gonna stare at me all day?" He asked, his tone still grumpy.
"Are you gonna act like a two-year-old all day?" She asked, her tone bordering between light and teasing and completely serious.
"I'm not actin' like a two-year-old!" He said.
"That's exactly what a two-year-old would say." Lindsay threw up her hands before making her way to her chair.
"Fine." He shrugged and turned back to his computer.
"You have the whole office speculating that you're not getting any." She said as she leaned across her desk. "I know why you're in such a bad mood. If I promise to remedy the situation, will you start acting like a professional?"
"Yeah." He said, chuckling slightly.
"Good." Lindsay stood up and headed towards the door. Just as she reached it, she turned around and said, "And if you ever act this way again because your daughter got the last of the Coco Puffs, you won't be getting any for a long time."