Disclaimer: We own.our little sanity. This is quite predictable.and quite
Mary Sue, as we planned purposely. ENJOY
Chapter One: Bonding under the influence
Oh well, it was a good day in Gondor.
Tomorrow they'd be Shire bound.
Well not really, they had only just arrived in Gondor, the city of Minas Tirith to be exact. The company consisted of Pippin, Thain and Took of the Shire, Merry, Master of Buckland, Sam, mayor of Hobbiton, Legolas, Gimli, and of course Aragorn and Arwen.
They were here on no real mission, just to rekindle the old bonds the fellowship had together. Other than the hobbits, they did not see each other often and were reluctant to let these relationships fade.
"Aragorn," Pip said curiously. "I have a serious question for you."
"Yes my friend?"
"What does.bondage.mean?"
Aragorn's face was pensive. "I'm not sure you're ready to learn of such things Pip, especially from me."
"I really want to know!" Pip protested. "I'm an adult now!"
Aragorn sighed. "Later, Pip. What brought this on anyway?"
"Well if ya must know." Pip sighed. "There's an elf here with Legolas, an' she brought along a hobbit friend of hers that her father had raised. She said she wanted to put me in bondage...I think she was joking, though."
"Obviously you can't detect sarcasm well, Mr. Took," said her from behind.
Pip was taken aback. "That.was way too good of timing."
"I still can't believe ye don't know what bondage is," Merry said disapprovingly.
"Well do you know?"
"No."
Pip shook his head in disgust.
"You should know by now," said the mysterious hobbit (an oxymoron to say the least), "You are an adult. You should tell him, Aragorn."
"Now CeNedra," Aragorn said, blushing, "That's not proper for this sort of company."
The hobbit now known as CeNedra walked over to Aragorn, looking up, straight in his eyes. "Tell him," she dared. "Are you man enough?"
"Now CeNedra, do you want me to get the genital cuff?" warned an elf from the doorway.
"Arell!" CeNedra complained. "It was just a bit of fun!"
"And I AM man enough," Aragorn objected through this. "Bondage is a sexual term, Pip. Find out from a lady firsthand."
"Aragorn, you should well know that that is not its only definition. You never know, she could be talking about the clean one," Arell pointed out.
"Arell," Aragorn said, "This is CeNedra."
"Yeah, but she could be trying to embarrass you. Like the time at the tavern."
"Well let's not go into that," Aragorn said quickly. He looked to CeNedra. "Well?"
CeNedra smiled. "Got you."
"You indeed are a cruel creature."
"Aye."
"I'm going to have to beat you," Arell said, frowning.
"Well there you go, getting into bondage again," CeNedra said wickedly.
"You're despicable."
"Aye."
"Wouldja stop saying 'aye'?"
"Aye."
Arell gave CeNedra a dirty look.
"Drinking contest, anyone?" CeNedra asked, changing the subject.
"I'm game," Legolas piped up.
"Don't give me that. You're an elf. You can't feel it."
"I'll take you up," Arell said, looking at Legolas, her competitive streak shining through.
CeNedra shrugged. "It's your loss. Who shall dare challenge me?"
"I shall," spoke up Pip. "On one condition."
"Name it."
"I want to know what bondage is."
"Aye, ye shall if ye beat me."
"What about me?" asked master dwarf...
"Uh.we'd love to," Merry said. "But uh.you're so great.uh.that none of us would stand a chance."
"Oh.right then," said Gimli, smugly.
"Who shall be the judge?"
"I shall! I shall!" Merry piped up.
"Excuse me Master Merry," Sam said, "Maybe I should.you'll probably end up drinking yourself afore this night is over."
Merry's face fell. "Whatever you say, Sam."
The two different groups began staring each other down and exchanging nasty insults (half in Elvish, half in Common), a routine practice before these contests began. Merry was the server of the drinks, even wearing a small apron.
"All righty Mary Sue, I'm gonna drink ye under the table," Pip said seriously.
"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?" CeNedra cried out.
"Mary. Sue."
"What's that mean?"
"What, don't you read fan fiction at all?"
"Er.no."
"Well on the off-chance that you win, I'll tell ye," Pip said smugly.
"Your father was a hamster and your other father smelt of elderberries!" Arell was shouting at the elf.
"May acidic snails eat your bowstrings!" Legolas retorted.
"Look, wouldja please just drink and get it over with?" said Sam. "Merry gave you your drinks a good two minutes ago."
"We're warmin' up here. Don't mess with us," CeNedra said with evil eyes.
"Don't get yer panties in a wad," said Pip.
"I ain't wearing none, Mr. Pip!"
His attempt at a joke quieted the room.
"Right.uh.let's start drinking now," said CeNedra
"Aye, I believe we need it," Pip said.
Chapter One: Bonding under the influence
Oh well, it was a good day in Gondor.
Tomorrow they'd be Shire bound.
Well not really, they had only just arrived in Gondor, the city of Minas Tirith to be exact. The company consisted of Pippin, Thain and Took of the Shire, Merry, Master of Buckland, Sam, mayor of Hobbiton, Legolas, Gimli, and of course Aragorn and Arwen.
They were here on no real mission, just to rekindle the old bonds the fellowship had together. Other than the hobbits, they did not see each other often and were reluctant to let these relationships fade.
"Aragorn," Pip said curiously. "I have a serious question for you."
"Yes my friend?"
"What does.bondage.mean?"
Aragorn's face was pensive. "I'm not sure you're ready to learn of such things Pip, especially from me."
"I really want to know!" Pip protested. "I'm an adult now!"
Aragorn sighed. "Later, Pip. What brought this on anyway?"
"Well if ya must know." Pip sighed. "There's an elf here with Legolas, an' she brought along a hobbit friend of hers that her father had raised. She said she wanted to put me in bondage...I think she was joking, though."
"Obviously you can't detect sarcasm well, Mr. Took," said her from behind.
Pip was taken aback. "That.was way too good of timing."
"I still can't believe ye don't know what bondage is," Merry said disapprovingly.
"Well do you know?"
"No."
Pip shook his head in disgust.
"You should know by now," said the mysterious hobbit (an oxymoron to say the least), "You are an adult. You should tell him, Aragorn."
"Now CeNedra," Aragorn said, blushing, "That's not proper for this sort of company."
The hobbit now known as CeNedra walked over to Aragorn, looking up, straight in his eyes. "Tell him," she dared. "Are you man enough?"
"Now CeNedra, do you want me to get the genital cuff?" warned an elf from the doorway.
"Arell!" CeNedra complained. "It was just a bit of fun!"
"And I AM man enough," Aragorn objected through this. "Bondage is a sexual term, Pip. Find out from a lady firsthand."
"Aragorn, you should well know that that is not its only definition. You never know, she could be talking about the clean one," Arell pointed out.
"Arell," Aragorn said, "This is CeNedra."
"Yeah, but she could be trying to embarrass you. Like the time at the tavern."
"Well let's not go into that," Aragorn said quickly. He looked to CeNedra. "Well?"
CeNedra smiled. "Got you."
"You indeed are a cruel creature."
"Aye."
"I'm going to have to beat you," Arell said, frowning.
"Well there you go, getting into bondage again," CeNedra said wickedly.
"You're despicable."
"Aye."
"Wouldja stop saying 'aye'?"
"Aye."
Arell gave CeNedra a dirty look.
"Drinking contest, anyone?" CeNedra asked, changing the subject.
"I'm game," Legolas piped up.
"Don't give me that. You're an elf. You can't feel it."
"I'll take you up," Arell said, looking at Legolas, her competitive streak shining through.
CeNedra shrugged. "It's your loss. Who shall dare challenge me?"
"I shall," spoke up Pip. "On one condition."
"Name it."
"I want to know what bondage is."
"Aye, ye shall if ye beat me."
"What about me?" asked master dwarf...
"Uh.we'd love to," Merry said. "But uh.you're so great.uh.that none of us would stand a chance."
"Oh.right then," said Gimli, smugly.
"Who shall be the judge?"
"I shall! I shall!" Merry piped up.
"Excuse me Master Merry," Sam said, "Maybe I should.you'll probably end up drinking yourself afore this night is over."
Merry's face fell. "Whatever you say, Sam."
The two different groups began staring each other down and exchanging nasty insults (half in Elvish, half in Common), a routine practice before these contests began. Merry was the server of the drinks, even wearing a small apron.
"All righty Mary Sue, I'm gonna drink ye under the table," Pip said seriously.
"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?" CeNedra cried out.
"Mary. Sue."
"What's that mean?"
"What, don't you read fan fiction at all?"
"Er.no."
"Well on the off-chance that you win, I'll tell ye," Pip said smugly.
"Your father was a hamster and your other father smelt of elderberries!" Arell was shouting at the elf.
"May acidic snails eat your bowstrings!" Legolas retorted.
"Look, wouldja please just drink and get it over with?" said Sam. "Merry gave you your drinks a good two minutes ago."
"We're warmin' up here. Don't mess with us," CeNedra said with evil eyes.
"Don't get yer panties in a wad," said Pip.
"I ain't wearing none, Mr. Pip!"
His attempt at a joke quieted the room.
"Right.uh.let's start drinking now," said CeNedra
"Aye, I believe we need it," Pip said.