It was a Friday night and I was at MacLaren's bar hitting on an Asian girl. She had thin, straight black hair that stretched just below her shoulders. Her whole face read desperate. Her nose was read, along with the edged of her eyes, she was drinking hard liquor, and she was shaking. She had obviously just gone through a hard break up, and needed my help. It was my duty, whenever I saw a hot and sad girl, to sleep with them.

"I am sorry for your loss," I said to her in my perfected acting sorry voice. Apparently, her dad had just suffered a heart attack. "Why don't we go back to my place and talk about this. You need someone right now." She nodded, and began sobbing. I helped her out of the bar and into a cab off to my apartment. Sad girls were so easy to trick. With their minds all foggy and vulnerable, they basically crawled into bed with you.

We got to my place and I brought the girl upstairs. I didn't remember her name, but I rarely did. I began conversation by telling her about how when my dad died, it helped me to sleep with random people. Especially the good looking blonde ones. She took in my information with wide and intent eyes, and asked if I knew of anyone. I pretended to think about it, and sighed. "Well, I normally don't do this," I began, "but I think that for this special case, I would be willing to do the honors. But only because of your loss."

"Really?" She sounded so excited. Not that I was surprised. She got the privilege of sleeping with me, the most awesome person in the world. I brought her to my bedroom, and sat her on the bed.

I told myself this would be easy, trying to boost my confidence. Usually I didn't need any sort of encouragement. I was a natural at this, and I always had been. However, lately, something had been happening. I tried not to think about it, because it was really depressing. I was the best at sleeping with girls in the world, and I knew that. But right now, I was going through something that I couldn't explain. I could hit on the girl. I could bring her home. I could get her into bed. I couldn't go further. Right before I get my clothes off, something happens. Somehow, I had been striking out, right before the good stuff. Somehow, I did something that made the girl get up and go. I couldn't explain it. It was new, nothing I had ever experienced before. But this time would be different. This girl was asking for it. She wouldn't leave, even if she found out about my porn collection. There was nothing I could accidently say that would take her out. I told myself this, over and over as I undressed. And I completed the task, to my utter relief. I looked at this Asian chick, and smiled.

However, just as I was about to get into bed, the same thing that had been happening all of those times happened again. I said something, only this time I said something different. All of those other times, I had said meaningless crap. "I am not really major league baseball player." "You looked thinner with the shirt on." This time however, I said something completely unpredicted. I didn't even know what I said about myself. After I said it, I realized it was true. I didn't know it before, but I had been striking out on purpose all those other times, and I only subconsciously knew why. And here I was, revealing the secret.

Just before I crawled I bed I released the words. "I love you Robin".

"What?" The girl in bed asked. I didn't know what to say. Did I really just say that out loud? I knew I was in love in Robin several months ago. Lily said I had to choose between bimbos and Robin. I chose bimbos. I didn't want to love Robin. Love wasn't my thing, and I didn't want it to become my thing, like Lily and Marshall. And, If Robin didn't love me back, then I would turn into Ted; desperate and depressed. So, instead of all that, I chose bimbos. Or at least I thought I did. But now, as my mouth informs me, I still love Robin. Great.

"Nothing," I lied.

"Did you just say I love you Robin?" She asked angrily.

"No no! I said I love you…sweetie." I added sweetie lamely at the end realizing I didn't know her name.

"Whatever. I am in a really bad mood, I don't even care. Lets just do it."

I was right when I said this would be easy, and that she could not be easily driven out. I was about to crawl into bed, but stopped and thought. Lily had said I had to choose bimbos or Robin. Obviously, bimbos wasn't really working out. Every time I tried to sleep with a girl, Robin stopped me. That meant just one thing. I had to choose Robin. I had to stop sleeping around. No more bimbos. No more meaningless sex. I had a new goal now. Robin. It was time to shoot for one girl. It would be hard. No more sleeping around…starting now.

"No." I said, and pulled away from my bed towards my clothes. "I changed my mind. I can't do this. I am sorry.

She stared at me shocked, with one of those "are you kidding me?" looks.

I sighed, and began pulling my clothes on. I was going to stop sleeping around for something I might never get. I had a desperate girl, willing to sleep with me, even when I called her Robin. I realized I didn't know her name. "What is your name?"

She glared at me. I did feel a little bad. Her dad just had a heart attack, she just got rejected seconds before I banged her, and I didn't even know her name.

"Jasmine" She said. She hadn't moved an inch since I had started getting dressed. What was I supposed to do? Why wasn't she moving.

"Well, Jasmine, I think you should go…"

She got off the bed stomped off to my bathroom, stole one of my silk robes and left. I could have stopped her, but I didn't care that much. I had about ten of those robes anyways, and I just wanted her out of my apartment. I needed time to think, and that was something I was never very good at. What was I supposed to do about these feeling for Robin. What were they? How do I get Robin to like me. I am a womanizing idiot. She is perfect. Beautiful, smart, and funny, and somehow I plan on getting her to be mine.

For the first time in my life, I wanted to cry. I thought about something I said to Ted long ago. "When I get sad, I quit being sad and be awesome instead." Be awesome, Barney. Be awesome. Stop being sad. I told myself again and again. Stop it, Barney. No tears. Pull yourself together! I tried, but every time I came close to holding back the tears, I thought of Robin and the cycle went on and on. I was crying in only a few minutes. I decided there was only one way to handle this situation. I only knew of one person who could help me now. I pulled out my cell phone to call the only person in the world who knew how I felt about Robin. I pulled out my cell phone and called Lily.