A/N: What does one do when one has writer's block for one particular piece of writing? WRITE SOMETHING ELSE. I'm not sure if this will be a one-shot or. I don't know… I was reading Divergent today and it made me miss this pairing. This is an AU where Tris chooses Erudite.
The Erudite library is a fascinating place.
It's still all a shock to her system. The glass walls. The white, grey and blue colours everywhere. She's never seen so many different shades of blue before. At first, it was the strangest thing in the world. Every wall and door seemed to be made of glass, transparent. She struggled with the idea that it was because the Erudites liked to think of themselves as genuine, clear, and transparent, like glass. Like water. It all felt like a façade, more than anything else— and the more time she spent here, the more she knew that it was just a façade.
Erudites were very good liars.
Expect for her.
When people ask her why she spends so much time in the library, she blanks out. The time she spends here, she often spends it thinking of reasons why she likes to come here to much. Any other reason besides the real reason.
But then her eyes catch the sight of grey, staring down at her from her office – which is just above the library, with a perfect view of it.
She stands there, looking over what's happening, a lot. On one side there's the library, on the other, the canteen— yet she stands on the left side, behind the glass window, watching the usually quiet library with her arms crossed over her chest and a pensive look on her face. Well… Tris thinks pensive, but really, it could be anything. Jeanine Matthews was a mystery. A puzzle with missing pieces she couldn't hope to find.
Why did she like to sit in the same spot, pretending to read a different book every day, whilst pretending not to stare back at her whenever she could, so much? She's not sure, really. There's just something about her. About Jeanine. Maybe it's the air of superiority about her, or just the ice in her eyes… or even the robotic way she speaks, moves, the trained expression of pure disinterest on her face.
She's above everything; all the vain, meaningless problems people face every day. She's like God, standing up there, over everything. Watching. Waiting. Judging.
Two days ago, Tris swore she caught a glimpse of a smirk on her lips when their eyes met.
It was the first time she caught sign of any human emotion in Jeanine's features.
And it's been two days since she saw her last. She's getting anxious. In a day, she'll be doing the final stage of the test – the test that will rank her. Depending on how many points she gets, she'll get a different rank, and that means a different job. She can't lie and say that she doesn't hope she ranks high enough to land a job where she gets to work closely with Jeanine. Someone was making a comment last night about how she's looking for a new personal assistant.
Tris likes to entertain the idea that she'll make an excellent personal assistant to the leader of her new faction.
She almost feels bad for wanting this so badly; her father wasn't much fond of Erudite, at all. But that doesn't matter, because she's not Abnegation anymore, and what her father thinks or believes in doesn't matter anymore. Faction before blood. But why had she chosen Erudite, in the first place? Why had she hesitated when all she ever had thought of doing was becoming Dauntless? It still didn't make sense to her, at all— but she chose Erudite, and she might as well embrace who she really is, now.
It's not so bad, she tells herself, chewing on her bottom lip and playing with the hard cover of the book she's reading. Genetics, Volume II. Yesterday she had stared at Volume I for an hour before she decided she had enough, and she was close to doing just that now, her eyes looking up at the office window one last time to make sure that the reason she bothers coming to the library at all hasn't decided to make a show, but just as she does that, looks up, that is—
She's there.
Tris forgot how short she is. But that doesn't change how intimidating she is. Not one bit. She looks down at Tris with the same air of superiority she does from her office, an eyebrow arched as a hand rests on top of Tris' book. Or the book Tris is pretending to read. "Prior, is it?"
She remembers. Tris nods, suddenly finding her mouth is dry. Her tongue moistens her lips, and she sits up straighter. Shoulders back. Chin high. "Ms. Matthews." Again; there's a fleeting moment where it almost looks like she's smirking. It's gone in the blink of an eye, though, and Tris finds only ice and indifference staring down at her. "What can I do for you, Miss Matthews?" She sounds… too eager. Too Abnegation. But this is her Faction leader. It's okay, right?
"Indeed, Miss Prior… what can, you do for me?" Her finger taps against the hard cover of the book, and she's deliberately slow in the manner in which she moistens her pink, full lips. They are perfectly shaped, and their colour is… inviting. Tris never thought you could think that about someone's lips. "I must say, I was pleasantly surprised when both you, and your brother, chose Erudite. You both made an excellent choice. Despite your test results," she adds an air of… amusement at the end of that sentence, emphasizing the last two words as her finger ceases its tapping.
Tris' eyes widens. Her body betrays her. Her heartbeat increases and she can't help but grip the edge of her seat.
"You've seen my test results?"
That, earns her a laugh, apparently— or something close to a laugh. It's more like a breath mixed with a laugh, a sound so low and short that if Jeanine wasn't taking up every inch of her camp of vision, she probably would not have seen it; and if she hadn't seen the way her lips moved and her facial muscles momentarily relaxed, she wouldn't have known that she had laughed at all. In fact, just by sound alone—she would have missed it completely.
This is another excuse she can use for her intense watching of Miss Matthews.
"You are an Abnegation transfer. Of course I've seen your test results."
Inconclusive. That's all she can think; the word keeps repeating itself inside her head, like an alarm beeping over and over again. She must be getting better at lying, because she smiles; and it doesn't feel forced at all. Though it looks nothing like a genuine smile. It barely reaches her eyes. "Of course."
Part of her still struggles to believe that Jeanine is really there, standing in front of her. She can't understand why. Jeanine never came down to the library in the month she's been here. And she's never gone down to the canteen, either. Everyone assumes she has her food bought to her office, which Tris has heard is also where she lives; there's some sort of hidden door somewhere that leads to an apartment. She doesn't doubt that— the Erudite are, after all, the masters of technology. There's security protocols and check at every corner. Fingerprint scans, eye scans… everything, or almost, everything, is done electronically. Which is why the library is almost always empty.
The people who still read books avidly are, mostly, people from other factions, who don't have as much access to tablets and other forms of technology as the Erudites. Tris is still learning about a lot of it, herself, even if she had used most of the things she's seen here some point during her education before she chose her faction.
So why is her faction leader standing before her now, looking at her with something trying to burn the wall of ice inside her grey eyes? She's… curious. She should be scared. Terrified, even. But she's… curious.
"You have been doing extremely well in your tests. Surprisingly well, for a Transfer. Particularly Abnegation." Tris can't help but feel blood rush to her cheeks. She's heard something to that effect – that her scores were the highest of all the Transfers, and ranking third among even the Erudite-born. So, maybe she's smarter than most people, that doesn't mean anything. Caleb had been a bit sore about the news, and that was probably the first time Tris witnessed him being anything remotely close to selfish.
She's still in shock he chosen Erudite instead of Abnegation, and she still feels like she's getting to know her brother. That she's known a stranger for sixteen years.
She's not sure, really, why this almost-praise from Jeanine makes her feel… happy. "Clearly, I'm far from being Abnegation." That's definitely a smile. Jeanine is smiling, and Tris feels like she should win something for making that happen. Even if her smile is cold. Robotic. Emotionless. It's still a smile, and she can't help but smile back, in response.
"Clearly."
Sixty seconds; they stare at each other in silence for sixty seconds, before Jeanine crosses her arms over her chest. She's wearing a dark blue skirt, a blouse so dark it almost look like black, but it's a really dark shade of what some called navy blue, and a blazer matching her skirt. It all seemed to hug her figure quite well. She had… curves. She looked like a woman, whereas Tris still looked like a child. A ten year old boy, more like; so yes, she does notice, and she does stare. But right now, she's hypnotized by grey eyes, and she's slapped out of her daydream like state when she hears that cold voice again.
"I'd like to run a few tests of my own with you, Miss Prior, if you wouldn't mind. Nothing you should worry about. Standard questions. Perhaps a few experiments. Would that interest you?"
The thought of being alone with Jeanine in a lab makes her heart beat a little faster. So that's why she was there. But it was still… peculiar. She could have easily sent someone to fetch Tris. Or sent a message. Why did she feel the need to come down and say that? Why did she start a short conversation, before hand? Tris bites her lower lip, frowning— she looks like she's trying to solve a quantum physics equation.
Jeanine opens her mouth, both eyebrows raised in a challenging expression, but Tris cuts her off with a quick: "Yes." Which is met with a curt nod. "I will have my assistant inform you of a suitable date and time."
And just like that, she turns on her black heels to leave. Tris stands up, hands resting on the table. "Miss Matthews?" She stops, slowly turns around, eyebrow arched, as if saying: Don't waste my time.
"Aren't you going to wish me good luck tomorrow?"
Yet another smile. Or smirk. Or— Jeanine's lips tilt upwards and she looks genuinely amused. "A true Erudite does not rely on luck, Miss Prior." And with a knowing look in those haunting grey eyes, she left, leaving Tris confused and mildly excited.
Well…
Not mildly, perhaps, because as soon as Jeanine leaves she flops on the chair she had been sitting on, her head spinning with the amount of information she's trying to make sense out of. Her sense are almost going on overdrive. The smell of Jeanine's perfume still lingers in the air. It's sweet but also… strong, at the same time. Like roses. But with its own… distinctive quality. But it's the sight of her, too; she had been there, so close, when Tris had grown used to looking up at her, behind that glass window. Close but out of reach. Like the stars…
And then she had collapsed, fallen on the ground, and whatever reason Jeanine had that she felt the need to come and tell Tris that herself, Tris was glad.
Up until now, she had been sure that Jeanine Matthews was inhuman.
Today she's learned she's as cold as ice, and as beautiful as she is intelligent… but she's not completely devoid of human emotions… she's robotic, perhaps, but not a machine. At least, that's the impression Tris got of her, from the brief moments she spent in her presence.
Jeanine Matthews remains a mystery to her, but she's learned new things about her today—and she hopes to learn more.
There's also, of course, the question of why Jeanine wants to run these tests. What, exactly, do they involve? She'll probably speculate over this until Jeanine contacts her again, but she hopes that this new piece of information doesn't torture her so much that she doesn't do as well in this last test as she has in the previous stages. But whatever happens— she's an Erudite now, and she's determined to prove it to herself.
But mostly, she wants to prove it to Jeanine.
