And I feel something so right by doing the wrong thing
And I feel something so wrong by doing the right thing

~ "Counting Stars" by OneRepublic

The crackling of the wood in the fireplace was the only sound that filled the common room. It was early morning, an ungodly hour far too close to midnight the sun would not rise for several hours. Every other Slytherin was asleep within their warm beds, safe from the cold air that always seemed to fill the dungeons. Not even their Head of House knew that she wasn't in her bed: the detection charms had been fairly easy to avoid as long as she didn't touch the ground on her way out.

Daphne could feel the usually dull ache at the back of her throat grow, and burn to an uncomfortable level that she could only compare to an inferno. She felt like clawing her throat, her arms, anything, in an attempt to get rid of the pain and discomfort despite knowing that there was nothing harming herself would do to decrease the thirst, in fact, it would probably only worsen it.

She knew she would probably be killed if anyone found out about it, so her parents had made sure every protective rune and ward was placed on her trunk, many of them even goblin wards, and drilled her silence and aloofness into her. They had been so relieved when she had received her Hogwarts letter. The other purebloods would have been suspicious if she hadn't, with the amount of accidental magic she had performed.

Daphne knew it was probably wrong to not tell anyone. They were all in danger with her around, but she couldn't help but feel just a little bit selfish. Astoria hadn't been born with the curse that had plagued her mother's family, and could live a normal life with anyone she chose. Daphne, on the other hand, would probably be alone for the rest of her life.

No vampire wanted a magic-raised mate, and no pureblood wizard would want to marry a born vampire. Her parents would accept nothing less for her, and Daphne knew their pride would probably be her doom, as it had been her aunt's.

Daphne wished that there was someone here that she could talk to, someone that could help her get everything off her chest, someone who wouldn't judge her. She knew such a person didn't exist, probably never would, especially not within her own house.

No one in Slytherin would even think of keeping her secret if it didn't benefit them in some way or the other. Everything they did was for their own benefit. There was no such thing as loyalty, and the only trust was to ensure everyone else knew their place in the hierarchy.

Everyone knew who she was and where she fit in. Daphne Greengrass, the Ice Princess of Slytherin, one of the highest in the hierarchy both because of her parents but also because of everything her eleven years of training had taught her.

They considered her the ideal image of a Slytherin female. It was a hilarious idea, but Daphne supposed that there was some value to what they said. She was cunning enough to keep her condition a secret, and only feed when there was absolutely no chance of getting caught, using her acceptance into Hogwarts as leverage to show that she was just as good as anyone else and allowing them to know her as the 'normal witch' before the 'dark creature' whom Daphne knew they would shun without second thought. They would never even consider her if she were introduced as a vampire instead.

Watching the dancing flames, Daphne wondered momentarily what it would be like to be normal, like her sister, like everyone else in Hogwarts. There was no one there that was forced to hide their true natures. Hogwarts was where most purebloods were allowed out of the careful guidance of their parents, and were truly free for the first time.

Daphne wondered how that felt. Surely that amount of freedom felt suffocating? After all, their actions had been monitored during almost every waking second, and it wasn't easy to suddenly change from those actions and thoughts to the freer ones that lay within Hogwarts.

She would have to ask Astoria when she attended Hogwarts next year. Of course, Astoria would probably restrict herself slightly as Daphne was there but Astoria had also always been much freer than Daphne ever had, not that Astoria could ever explain the feeling after never having truly experienced restriction.

Watching her sister was like watching a leaf dance around in a playful wind, never quite settling down and never truly wanting to. Their parents had never managed to tame Astoria, and Daphne honestly hoped that they never did. Knowing someone like Astoria existed in the world, in her world, was more than enough to keep her going.

Written for Game of Life Challenge: common room, leaf, "Counting Stars" by OneRepublic

Written for Care of Magical Creatures Assignment 7: Write about someone keeping a secret that is detrimental to them (800 min)

Written for Rubik's Cube Challenge: Supernatural!AU