Its utterly terrifying to realize how your life can change in an instance.

A blink of the eye and you could go from feeling alive to teetering the edge of death. A single breath could mean the difference between a beating heart and a cooling body.

Why is it that in these situations are true colors shine through? Why does it take a brush of death to set your priorities straight? To make you forget, to make you forgive, to make you admit what you've been afraid to speak? All of a sudden we all become heroes, we all become brave and we all find solace in truth instead of false hope in our lies.

But for the most part, we don't think in these situations, we just let ourselves feel. This instance was no different, thats exactly what was happening, they were running on autopilot because it hurt too much to take a step back and let the realization of the situation hit.

Two sets of hands work so very frantically trying to stop the bleeding, blood soaked fingers shaking uncontrollably and mixing with salty tears that ran down in spurts.

"We need to get him to a hospital, Dembe." Her voice cracked with every single word, almost like it pained her to speak.

Liz watched Dembe direct his eyes to a spot for her to put pressure on while he reached into his pocket to retrieve a phone. He looked like he was half in shock and half disbelieving and for the very first time Liz was allotted to see this man display an array of emotions that ranged from fear to sorrow and then to guilt.

She could faintly hear him have a conversation, his words coming out in a jumbled mess depicting a sense of urgency, but she could not focus on him, all she could focus on was the blood, the gun shot wound and the man laying on the floor without a heartbeat.

How did she let this happen? She was sure she would never forgive herself. He looked like life was drained right out of his body, so helpless, so weak, so pale...like he was already too far gone from her- And she cursed him and herself.

"You don't get to die on me, you bastard." She says in between breaths and compressions to his chest. "Reddington, wake up!" She growls but it sounds more like a scream.

"You don't get to do this to me, you don't get to leave me before you give me answers," Her nerves are shot and she stares at her hands, disbelieving.

There is so much blood, she has his blood on her hands. And then she surveys his face and she finally breaks because she can finally see him- she sees him like she's never been afforded the opportunity to do so before. She can study his features without feeling self-conscious, those long blonde eyelashes, the structure of his face, the thin line of his lips and the curve of his jaw and it makes her stomach clench and her body convulse because the only part of him she can't study are those eyes- and she wants nothing more in this world then for him to open his eyelids and allow her to get lost in his magnetic gaze- she wants to lose herself in him and she fears she will never get the opportunity to do so again.

"I need you to wake up, Red," She pleads, "I need you to open your eyes and look at me." Dembe returns and informs her that a car is on its way to take them to a safe place, a place with a bed and a doctor.

"I need answers, I need guidance, I need your protection," Her voice cracks again and she doesn't do a good job at hiding the fear on her face or controlling the tears that continue to pool down her cheeks and stain his blood-soaked dress shirt. "I need...-you." She finally breathes out, more like a revelation she just admitted not only to him, or Dembe but herself as well.


For the first time in his life, he feels light as a feather, weightless- he feels like he's floating, gliding instead of walking.

Its not just his body that feels so free- its his heart and soul- as if all those shackles that have chained his arms and legs- all the guilt, the pain, the sorrow and the regrets- they have all been lifted off his shoulders and he can finally walk.

He can finally walk towards the light because he can finally see the light.

He sees it in the distance - its close enough to see but far enough that its out of reach.

But now he can walk weightlessly and he's attracted to the light- he wants so bad to be surrounded by it so he goes in pursuit of it.

His life has been filled with so much darkness, and even though she found a spark and lit a small flame inside the depths of his soul that continued to burn just for her- he knew better than to let himself lean on her- so instead he leans on the light in the distance and starts following the path that continues to illuminate his surroundings and he wonders what he will find in the end.

He walks a safe distance before he's stopped in his tracks.

Her voice- he hears her voice.

He's halfway towards the light and he looks behind him and all he sees is the darkness that he wants to escape- he wants to finally be free- But its her voice that he hears and it makes him freeze into space because he doesn't want to leave her but the light is so close that he can almost grasp it and he almost starts to move towards it again but then he hears her voice again but now its not an incoherent mumble because he can hear the pain in her voice and feel it in the depths of his soul.

"Please, Don't leave me," She pleads and it makes his heart skip a beat, "I need you." He hears her declare and suddenly he doesn't feel so weightless anymore.

tbc...