A/N: In 7x01, there is a scene in the loft, where Martha is sitting with Alexis while the phone lines are set up, and she's comforting Alexis, saying that Castle will come back. I don't know if I'm the only one who noticed, but for me, it was really a throwback to the S5 two-parter, because there was a scene where Martha comforts Castle about Alexis, also while the phone trace is being set up. So, while my fics most often center around Caskett, I felt the need to write a short one-shot centering around Martha and her role in the lives of Castle and Alexis. (also, feel free to flail about premiere in the reviews or PM me :D)
Martha Rodgers, as an actress, had always prided herself on her ability to mask her feelings and be whomever she needed to be. There were times when it was easy, when she could effortlessly slip into the persona of someone else.
There were also times when it was much harder. Times like when her granddaughter was missing in a foreign country, or when her son had gone missing twenty minutes before his wedding. When Alexis needed her reassurance that he would come home, or when Richard needed to hear how strong his daughter was, and that she would be okay. It was hard to act when those men were bent over the table, messing with wires and hooking things up to monitor and wait for the phone to ring.
She did her best, though, to be who they needed her to be, because that, after all, was her trade, her craft, who she was. An actress.
Sometimes, she almost wished that she wasn't. She wished that she could shed all her personas and be a mother and a grandmother. She wished she could break down and cry. It simply was not in her nature.
Martha Rodgers was a comforter, a protector not only of the people she loved, but also of herself. She had raised her son alone, and she knew there had been times when she wasn't always the best or most attentive mother, but she adored Richard, and she always wanted the best for him. She didn't especially want to be here with Alexis, on the same couch where she had sat with Richard, promising him that his little girl would be okay. She didn't want to assure Katherine that he had no misgivings. She didn't want to be the comforter, the glue. She wanted to curl up and cry, to break down and scream and wreak havoc in everyone's life until her baby was home. She wanted to do anything but play this role. She wanted to be hysterical and anything but calm.
But most of all, she just wanted to see her son. She just wanted to hold her baby and see his smile and know that he was okay and look into his beautiful blue eyes that never quite lost all of their childlike innocence. She wanted to see him so badly that it physically ached, somewhere deep inside, the sort of ache that she was sure only a mother could feel. She wanted to know that he was safe, and she wanted to hug him and touch him and look him over with a mother's scrutiny and love and perception.
But that would just have to wait. For now, she was who she was. Strong and honest and caring. The protector. The comforter.
