A/N: Finally! I posted the first chapter of the SG-13 saga! Don't know when I'll post the next chapter, but hopefully soon! This takes place during episodes 17 and 18 in Season 7 of SG-1, Heroes. Please R&R!
Disclaimer: I don't own SG-1, or else Daniel would get a hell of a lot more attention than he does! I only own SG-13 (except for Wells), and not even all of them! Only Kira. My two friends who, sadly, don't have an account on FF, own Muki and Reece.
A/N 7-11-15: Fixed some stylistic errors and made things a little less choppy.
"So what's your guess?" asked Major Tyler Reece.
Muki Huzanaka shrugged. "I dunno. What do you think?"
Reece paused for a moment. "Two-headed alien. One head good, the other bad. What do you think, Wells?" he asked Airman Simon Wells, who also shrugged.
"Trees, I guess," the airman said.
"Disqualified for smartassism!" Reece gleefully announced.
"Is that even a word?" Second Lieutenant Kira Feldin asked, her attention never wavering from the manga she was reading while simultaneously walking and balancing a knife on the tip of her finger.
"Well, it is in my book. What do you think we'll find on this good ol' planet of P3X-666?"
"Bad luck," the redhead replied flatly. She closed her book and put it away, the knife disappearing as well.
"Yeah, but shouldn't Unlucky 13 cancel it out?" suggested Wells.
"Luck is extremely fickle," Muki told him. The alien teen had more than enough experience in that area. "On that note, I predict we'll find an ancient city, or the ruins of one."
"Hey, you're cheating!" Reece protested. "You're looking through the binoculars!" And indeed she was.
Kira perked up, interest piqued. "There's ruins of a city?" she eagerly asked. The 26-year-old was their self-proclaimed ninja, jack-of-all trades on the team, and her current "hobby" was archaeology.
"Well come on, let's get there before Feldin blows a gasket," Reece jokingly warned. His 2IC gave him a glare which he responded to with a boyish grin.
As they entered the ruins, Kira let out a little happy squeal. Some things just shouldn't be uttered by certain people. Ever. "It's in Ancient!" she exclaimed, doing her equivalent of a happy dance, another thing which scared the others immensely and was added to the list of things that should also never be done by certain people.
"Well I'll be," Reece drawled. "OK Feldin, go ahead and… do whatever it is you need to do."
"Um, I'm not exactly the best person to translate this, sir. We'd have to get a certified archaeologist/anthropologist/linguist," she replied with a straight face, though her eyes were averted. Reece stared at her, scrutinizing.
"Aha!" he exclaimed. "You just want to see Dr. Jackson, don't you?" He knew something was up. She never called him "sir" out of habit, or was very modest. It was usually "Major", or "Reece", or some sort of affectionate derogative. Tyler knew that it was just a quirk of hers (hopefully); after all, he had his own arsenal of affectionate insults himself. He grinned as Kira blushed, while Muki and Wells snickered.
Turning back to "competent mode", the lieutenant began to closer look at the ruins while the other three hung around like flypaper. Suddenly, they heard a whirring and clacking sound. A moment later, a drone appeared and started firing at them. "Yaa!" Muki shrieked, diving for cover just in time to avoid an energy blast. The other three opened fire on the drone, but the bullets were just deflected by a force shield.
"Well, that worked well," Reece remarked dryly.
"Maybe if we fire at the wall behind it," Wells suggested.
"Or we could just do this." Feldin produced a knife out of nowhere and threw it, hitting the drone dead on. It stopped, then dropped to the ground somewhat anti-climactically. "Wow, and I was just aiming randomly!" she said in mock surprise. Reece shuddered at the thought of his 2IC randomly throwing sharp, pointy objects around. Or any kind of objects really.
"Well, let's get this lugged back to the SGC. Muki, go and dial the gate up, let the folks at home know we've got a present for 'em." Being the fastest sprinter in the group, Muki took off, making it back to the Stargate in record time and informing the SGC of the drone.
After it was sent through, SG-13 finally got around to studying the ruins. Well, to be precise, Feldin cackled quietly as she curiously examined it while the others sulked around, waiting for someone who actually had degrees and not an online crash course so she could initiate small talk with her crush to get here. The alien sun had reached its zenith as Reece and Wells patrolled the perimeter, discussing Wells's pregnant wife to pass the time.
"So it's a boy, hmm?" the major peered at the photo shown to him. Wells nodded. "Well, good luck there, Simon. I'm sure you'll make a great dad. Me? Ah, I can't even imagine being married, let alone having kids. Especially after that fiasco on P2R-958." He shuddered at the memory and Simon laughed.
"That was hilarious, them trying to hitch you to Feldin," the airman snickered.
Reece flushed. "Well, how was I supposed to know that in their culture bitching like we do is what their married couples do?"
"You know, most people think you and her are together, or at least doing it."
"What? I can't even have a normal conversation with her, let alone live with her! Not to mention the fraternization rules we'd probably be breaking, even if we are in different branches of the military, and besides that, she could probably castrate me with one kick!"
"Well, she isn't known as the Ninja of the SGC for nothing," Wells conceded. A rustling sound caught Reece's ear. He signaled for quiet. Suddenly a Jaffa leapt out from the bushes and shot Wells. As the airman fell with a shout, Reece turned and shot the attacker. He then hurried over to his injured teammate.
"Hey, Simon, are you okay?" he questioned, glancing over him with a cursory inspection while thinking that basic first-aid training was really not that useful right now aside from letting him know that Simon wasn't dead.
"Oh, God, it hurts!" Wells ground out through the pain. Suddenly, they heard P-90 fire and staff blasts off in the distance.
Reece toggled his radio. "Feldin, what's your situation?" He could hear shouting and more weapons fire over the radio.
"Whaddya think? A bunch of Jaffa just showed up and we're under fire!" He heard an explosion. "Damn it, Muki, we need to conserve the grenades!" Just then a new voice came over the radio.
"Major Reece, an analysis of the drone you brought back showed that it sent out a message before it was destroyed," General Hammond started.
"Yeah, sir, we kinda figured that. Feldin and Muki are at the ruins under fire and I'm in the woods with Wells. He's been shot in the back, sir." He thought a moment. "Feldin, how many Jaffa can you count?"
"Well, it's kind of hard since I'm being shot at right now, but I'd say about 7 or 8 at least." The lieutenant's voice was dripping with sarcasm.
"Backup and a medic is on the way. Hammond out." A couple minutes later, Muki came stumbling through the brush.
"Geez, don't scare me like that! You know what I get like when I'm nervous!" Reece exclaimed. He looked past the teen. "Where's Feldin? And what are you doing here anyway?"
"Giving them a run for their money, and apparently it's better if you shoot the impolite Jaffa with her instead of me," Muki pouted. Tyler chuckled nervously, then rose quickly to go the way Muki had come, back towards the ruins where Feldin was.
He made it there in record time, somehow managing to avoid getting shot. "Glad you joined the party," Kira shouted over the noise of gunfire and staff blasts.
"Holy shitake mushrooms!" Reece exclaimed upon seeing the amount of bullet casings on the ground. "How much ammo have you got there?"
Feldin shrugged. "A lot. Make yourself useful now, will ya?"
For the next few minutes, there was nothing but non-stop firing. If they hadn't been fighting for their lives, Reece probably would've been more amazed at the amount of ammo his 2IC had squirreled away. Then, the back-up Hammond promised came.
"I thought you said there were 7 or 8 Jaffa!" Colonel O'Neill thundered. "Where did you learn to count?"
"I said there were at least 7 or 8, and I was being shot at at the time, Colonel!" Feldin countered.
"How many pockets have you got anyways?" Tyler asked the redhead.
She shrugged. "Few dozen, probably." She tossed out the number casually.
"A few dozen?" Reece blurted. "How do you sew that many pockets into a set of BDUs? Yours aren't even standard size, they're smaller!"
Feldin shot him a glare for the "smaller" comment and icily replied, "Ninja skills."
Reece felt the sudden urge to hit his head against a wall, but Colonel O'Neill had other ideas. "Major, go back to cover Dr. Fraiser! We need another person on the perimeter."
Tyler complied, making a frantic dash for the treeline and trying to avoid being hit by any staff blasts. He took up a post among a cluster of trees not far from where Doctors Fraiser and Jackson were attempting to stabilize Simon.
A sudden flash of movement caught his eye to his left as he saw a Jaffa aiming at the group in the clearing. Tyler shot once, the bullet hitting its mark. The Jaffa dropped to the ground dead.
A few moments and no Jaffa later, the sounds of battle died out. A couple minutes after that, Dr. Fraiser decided that Simon was stable enough to make the trip to the Stargate. Carefully transferring Wells on a stretcher, the group made their way back in relative safety.
As they neared the gate, Reece saw his 2IC leaning on Colonel O'Neill. Crap! Feldin too? He then saw that it was the other way around; O'Neill was being supported by Feldin, the gray-haired man wincing in pain as he hobbled to the gate. The major gave a sigh of relief, then chuckled as he heard their conversation.
"Well, at least this will hopefully deter that film fanatic Bregmann from trying to interview me," O'Neill grumbled.
Kira grinned evilly. "Permission to kick his ass verbally and/or physically if he tries, sir?"
O'Neill grunted, hiding a smirk. "Permission granted. Just nothing permanent, okay?"
Emmett Bregmann tried to enter the infirmary only to be blocked by a nurse, who said, "I'm sorry, Mr. Bregmann, but you can't come in here."
"Yeah, yeah, confidentiality, yadda yadda," the documentary maker said dismissively. "But I heard there were some injuries."
Janet heard the disturbance from where she was treating Airman Wells. The petite doctor frowned.
"You want me to knock him out for you?" Kira Feldin asked from where she and her team were sitting, keeping Wells company. Fortunately the airman's injuries had only looked life threatening, and he would only need a few weeks and a bit of physical therapy to recuperate. "I could say that the light hit his eyes in such a way that I thought he was a Goa'uld."
The "innocent" look on the lieutenant's face made Janet laugh. "I don't think that'll be necessary. I would, however, appreciate if you would," she thought a bit for the right word, "escort him out."
Kira grinned and smacked her open right palm with her fist. "That I can do. Watch and learn Muki; how to get rid of an annoying man, whether he be someone who's trying to hit on you or someone just getting on your nerves."
"Awesome!" the alien teen chirped, watching the redhead as she converted throwing Bregmann out of the infirmary into a lesson for her younger "sister". Reece sat back and smirked. It was fun to watch his 2IC threaten people, so long as it wasn't him.
"Excuse me," Kira said with faux cheerfulness as she approached the filmmaker. "Let me borrow him for a sec," she told the nurse, who threw her a grateful nod. Gripping the man's arm, she led him from the infirmary.
"Hey, wait, I wanted to talk to-" Bregmann was cut off as Kira yanked him out the door. "Waah!" he cried in alarm. He was dragged along through the hallway, still protesting. The lieutenant deposited him on his feet next to the two airmen who were supposed to help him with the documentary.
"OK, listen to me," Feldin snapped, her forced cheerfulness gone. "Mr. Bregmann, no one here likes you, much less Colonel O'Neill, who I know you're trying to get an interview with." She rolled her eyes. "Hell, half the base probably knows. So let me give you this word of warning: If you want to live, leave well enough alone." The cheerful smile was back. "Okay, now have a nice day!" With that, Feldin walked away, presumably back to the infirmary.
"Um, did she just curse us?" one of the airmen asked nervously.
"Sir, SG-13 is known for their infamous bad luck," the other informed Bregmann, equally as off-balance. "Sir?" he asked, seeing the documentary maker bow his head.
"All right, that's it! I'm going to get that interview with O'Neill, no matter what!" Bregmann declared, his determination increased tenfold.
"No matter what" turned out to be Janet throwing them out of the infirmary (not literally, of course), Feldin sneakily placing smoke bombs in their pockets (don't even ask), Muki laughing at the aforementioned smoke bombs, and Reece accidentally dumping pudding on Bregmann's head (that was actually an accident).
By the time the filmmaker left the SGC, he'd gotten about 5 seconds of footage of O'Neill actually cooperating with him, many slides of just smoke - damn smoke bombs, Bregmann thought - and him coughing, the interviews he had with the rest of SG-1 and other various personnel, and an episode of The Simpsons. Frankly, he didn't want to know how the latter got on there.
The entire base celebrated the filmmaker's departure, and if Colonel O'Neill noticed that one of his VHS tapes was missing, well… it was all for the greater good.
