Poison-Pen

Summary: Every celebrity has one, right? The one they dread... and the one they hope for. Kotoko/Haiji

Because now I know there are people out there that actually like this odd pairing. Here's a July 4th gift for you. Not that the contents of the fic have anything to do with the fourth of july...

Kotoko's fingers were shaking as she reached for the first envelope sitting on the pile. It was from the same person as the last time, and the one before that too. She knew it. She didn't know how she knew, but she knew. Even though the outside was no different than the rest she knew when she opened it she would find a triangular folded piece of paper inside - and the envelope didn't outline it's shape at all.

The paper would be yellow, crisp, like a crackled leaf in her hands. It would have a foul stench clinging to it. One familiar to the air of those rooms when her mother was left lying on the bed, covered in that... gunk. Unlike her, kept pristine by their careful 'injections.'

She flinched away from the pile of envelopes, fingers curling away at the memories. They were already with her constantly. It was so difficult to push them back down, and... it was about to come back full force. The moment she opened that envelope-

Calm down. Just get it over with.

If only there was a way to avoid it, but her mother, her manager, everyone insisted she read every fan letter that came for her. How could she possibly look at them if she tossed this one aside? They would know. There was no way they wouldn't.

With a shaky breath Kotoko reached forward again, gripping the edge of the envelope with her fingertips and dropping it onto the empty ground in front of her. She glanced to the door once, just to make sure it was closed before covering her nose with one hand, and tearing the white paper open with the other.

And there it was, sitting in the tattered remains of the envelope.

She gagged the moment she tasted the stench on her tongue, hand sliding down to cover her mouth as well. Her fingers pinched the bridge of her nose as she unfolded the paper with one hand, wishing she had a glove. It was a good thing she had taken the steps to counter the smell, because she always seemed to forget just why she truly dreaded these letters. Upon seeing the messy scrawl on the page she screamed into her hand, a pitiful sound not unlike that of a dying bunny.

June 13th
your birthday,

Miss Gemini
Li'l A
Princess Peach.

I heard that you liked it, anyway.
That game where a man
a mAn
like me
would take you awAy
from a evil tyrant.

hmm?
isn't that rIGHT?
-ight.

It is? Isn't it?
That's why
you wear so much pink.

Sooo pink
you are.

A delight.
a dRaMa delight
pink and white

how much?
How much would it be,
so you never leave?

What do you think the queen will say
PrinCeSS?

Kotoko threw the paper the moment her eyes reached the end, the moment she stopped reading. She slumped onto the floor, shivering, wondering again who it was. Just what sort of man had her mom sold her to for one of those nights? They were all despicable, but this one... he was the worst. Why couldn't he leave her alone? It wasn't her decision to have him touch her like that. She never wanted any of them near her, yet time after time she would be lying alongside her mother, weeping well into the morning even after they passed out.

It would be easier to ignore it if there wasn't any truth in those words. Not just the facts, but her own... well, dreams. To be taken away and never go through any of it again. To be saved. Yes, she wanted to be saved, but not by this man... No, she wanted... she needed...

Need.

-need you

now little
TiNY
bird

need you
more than once

Where are you?
ill find you / i will
find you fnd yuo fiNEEd uoo

Kotoko yelped as the words appeared in her mind, just as clear as when she had read them a month ago. After her mother had moved them into a larger apartment with all the money she earned off her, sending an assistant to get the mail - that letter - from her prior place of residence.

She hoped he never found her. That the only way she got these letters was from the fan mail box, and not that of her apartment building. If he found her... what would he do? Everything every other man had done and more? Probably. Whatever more was, whatever... just what could he possibly do that he hadn't done already?

Kotoko took in a breath, glancing back to the pile of letters. Maybe... maybe it was here by now, as well. They didn't come as frequently as the others, but enough time must have passed for the third letter to arrive, right?

Most of the letters in the pile were white, a few were gray, but there was one... Her eyes searched frantically for it. There was one that was pink.

She reached into the pile to grasp onto that letter, pulling it out from the rest and opened it, sliding the small square postcard out from it. Kotoko ran her thumb over the image engraved into the surface this time. A yellow butterfly surrounded by pink fireworks exploding in the air next to it. The sprays of pink were intersecting over the background, the gaps between them only a fourth the size of the butterfly. And on the back-

Kotoko flipped it over.

On the eve of morning
Fly to the crescent
I will be waiting there
With black steel wings

It was short, as always. But it meant he was here! Not a man. Not that man. But her prince! He had come for her just like he said he would! And once she was away, there was no chance the other one would ever find her. Not her mother, not her manager, nobody!

She wouldn't have to live up to their expectations anymore. She could be free. Just like the butterfly on the postcard, seeing the beauty in the world rather than what she saw on a regular basis.

It would have gotten to be too much if he hadn't sent that first letter back then, so unexpected, but so welcoming.

Deutzia,

I hope this reaches you.
I've been watching you for awhile now.

Every performance since, Angel's Wings.
You played the part so well.
A little too well.

Those tears were real, weren't they?
You got a phony award for it,
Because they couldn't see.

But I can, empty tree.
I know about it,
Why you cry.

Don't worry,
I'll make it stop.

Soon.