Harry Potter: The Marauder Diaries

Prelude

Harry: I'm tired of all these books about me! I mean hey… 19 years since I defeated Voldy-moldy-pants and nothing...NOTHING… where are these books taking me?!?! I have a family to think about, ya know! My wondeful wife Ginny, my three kids! GUH! I don't think I culd take another before I hit mid-life crisis!

Ginny: Ahem. I think Harry is right. Too long we have been fighting evil and I simply refuse to sit through ANOTHER fan fiction about a girl that hates me and wants to marry Harry. He's MY husband. We have kids... you know what that means...so BLAH to you all!

Ron: Yeah! What Harry said!

Hermione: RON! Aren't you going to say something about the guys that write fan fictions wanting to marry ME?!

Ron: Erm…

Hermione: RON!

Voldy-moldy-pants: I demand that I not be called Voldy-moldy-pants. It is very demeaning. Plus, I could easily blow all of you into tiny smithereens.

Me: No can do, Voldy-moldy-pants. I'm the authority here, and youz gots ta listen to me!

Voldy-moldy-pants: Wait, if Potter and I aren't going to be feuding in this story… then who is? I don't want to be paird up with some blubbering fool, nor do I wish to face one.

Harry: Moldy is right… who is this one about? Cause, uh, I'm not fond of having my history altered too much.

Me: Gah. If I said it right here all of our readers will be turned off! You'll just have to wait and see. Let's just say... both of you will have a good long rest.

Harry, Ron, Hermione, Voldy, and Ginny: TELL US NOW!

Me: Can you read?

Hermione: I happen to be able to read very well thank you. I was the smartest in our class.

Me: Okay. Look at the title then...

-Awkward Silence-

Me: Now… on to CHAPTER ONE of Harry Potter and the Marauder Diaries!

Ron: Bother!