A/N: Hey. Yeah, that's right. I started another story without finishing my other ones. Again. Wanna make something of it?
Summary: While visiting her friends' graves, Jennifer sees someone she hadn't expected to. And says and thinks things she never thought she would.
Disclaimer: Ehh... PG.
Sorry Doesn't Make It Okay
By: Mazzie May
Jennifer Anne Simpson walked quietly over the cobble stone path that lead to the cemetery. It was in desperate need of a touch up; the grass was a little long; ferns falling over the edges; vines stretching out across the way; tree branches dangerously low. All the plants were healthy, however, and as green and as lush as they'll ever be. Probably one of the most breath-taking sites you'll see. And Jenny most likely would have felt the same – had it not remind her of the Burroughs Mansion so much.
She shuddered at the thought. That was actually part of the reason she was at the cemetery in the first place; paying respect to all of her friends and comrades that had died there. They didn't just die she thought bitterly. They were murdered. It was the sad truth. Gotts, the Professor, Harris, Beth, Kay, Sullivan, Anne, Laura, Lotte, Helen... All of them gone. All because of that insane Scissorman. Well, that's not exactly right. There were two of them. Brothers, actually; she killed one of them and the other came for his revenge. She'd learned that later, though. She laughs now, but back then, she'd thought him immortal, coming back to finish her off and all that jazz.
She started on the old stone steps. What had first tipped her off about it being two different men was they way they killed people. Dan, the Scissorman that chased her about town, was less creative in his killings than his late brother, Bobby. She remembered Bobby teaching Lotte how to fly, using the third story window. And what he did to Anne in the courtyard... She suppressed a shudder, but it took some effort. In fact, these stairs seemed a lot like the ones Anne was killed on. She slowed down considerably, taking cautious steps. Bobby could be just around the next tree...
She quickly dismissed that thought. Bobby was gone. She didn't have to worry about him anymore. Besides, she had a lunch date with Nolan in an hour and stealth walking her way to all of the graves would take up that hour and more. She resumed normal speed finishing off the last bit of stairs almost jogging. Checking her watch, she cursed. Helen would've glared hard daggers at her for that, but Helen wasn't around and cursing had become apart of Jenny's life. She was running 20 minutes late. Nolan was gonna shoot her.
Nolan Cambell was one of the three people, her self not included, to escape Scissorman's wrath. Besides she, Edward, Nolan and his camera man Tim survived. Tim's survival marveled her. The man fidgeted like a rabbit, jumped at everything, but, My God was he fast! When Dan attacked, he'd landed closest to Tim. Tim had thrown the camera, spun and took off like a jet, flying away from Dan with the speed of a world champion track runner.
Even Dan had been surprised. He'd literally halted; he'd taken a few steps to start after Tim, and was taken back by shock with the rest of them as they watched Tim zoom out the gates of the Burroughs estate. He hesitated before going after Helen. Nolan had been shocked into a laugh and she actually had to lean back moment. Even as he started towards Helen, she just leaned against the wall watching Tim's dust.
He'd gone to town and, instead of cowering in a corner as Nolan had suggested he would, he returned an hour later with help. Lots and lots of policemen arrived. But Dan and the bodies of his mother and father were already gone. Well, if you're going to get technical, Dan was still there, she thought mildly, hooking a loose lock of richly coloured hair behind her ear.
She rounded the long and tall, vine covered wall and entered the cemetery. He'd stashed the bodies of his parents and then went under the statue, killing Kay. Jenny had found the body and feared that Edward had lost his life to the murderous foe, as well. But he'd been in the back of the hall, sitting there as if his guardian wasn't lying in a cooling pool of her own blood. That's when she started to figured it all out.
She made her way around the graves, murmering a small "Good Day" to Gotts and Harris and dropping a flower to each of them as she passed. Edward had been Dan. Dan was Edward. It didn't come right away, but after she had calmed down, and during all those days she'd stayed up into the unholy hours of the night, she thought about all the events, and Dan and Edward had to have been the same person. The timing and the areas. It was the only way she could make it work. She'd cried a lot when it all came together. Edward had meant a lot to her.
She stopped by Laura's grave to find flowers already there. She frowned and looked out to see if anyone was around. She spotted bright red flowers on Lotte's grave across the way and just to the north of that was Anne's grave, and red flowers where there, too. She placed her right hand on her hip staring at the red flowers at her feet. Come to think of it, weren't there flowers of Gotts' and Harris' graves, too?
Maybe Clara stopped by... Clara Mason had been Jenny's guardian since Helen's death. Jenny wasn't under her care anymore, but she still treated Jenny like her daughter. Her dropping by to clean the graves for Jenny was a normal thing. Yet... Clara hates red. Truth. Clara thought red was too much like the blood Jenny had been "forced to see" as Clara put it. She wouldn't wear it or have it in the house, afraid it would upset Jenny. Same thing with scissors. So, if Clara didn't do it...
Jenny started towards Helen's grave. Maybe it was just some over emotional person paying respect to the dead. That happened a lot. Originally, people like that had flown in from all over the world to tell her "Everything is gonna be okay, honey". That's calmed down over the last 7 years, but it still happened occasionally; some bleeding heart, running up to her and hugging her so tight she had a bit of a problem breathing. She just smiled, giving many thanks for their support, and quickly got away.
Jenny stole a glance at the sky to see that the clouds had disappeared quite a bit since that horribly rainy days before this one. For three days it did nothing but rain, forcing her to wait to visit the graves. Today, however, was relatively clear and she began to think that wearing her black jacket was a bad idea, with the hot sun beating against her back. She trudged up the hill, again wondering where the damn gardener for the cemetery was. Her boots continued to get caught in the too long grass, almost tripping her twice.
She would've used the path if she just wasn't so Goddamn late. Nolan hated it when a client was late. He was a reporter, after all; people were objects and when he tells an object to be at the Café on 7th at 1:00 PM, he expects them to be at the Café on 7th at 1:00 PM. She cursed and shook that grass off her foot again. She and Nolan had grown close since the incident. Well, she had grown closer. When she'd first met him and he had shown so much interest in her, she'd felt so special. And how he told her to stay with him until it all died down after their escape was practically a declaration of love to her. In reality, however, he gotten close to her in the beginning to get the best inside scoop on the Burroughs Mansion Murders and having her stay with him would give them both good press, making him look great. She figured it out pretty friggin' quick, when within a month of their living together he asked if she had a friends house to stay at while he brought over a lady-friend. She'd ended up at Edward's.
Nolan hadn't figured out that Edward Steinjer was actually Daniel Kain Burroughs, not that she'd tell him. She'd never let on to knowing it, either. Edward had begun to let his true self be seen. Not in a psycho killer kind of way, but he definitely had a lot more confidence. He'd dropped the timid boy act. A lot of people called it a sudden boost of self-esteem; surviving the same murder twice can do that to you. Even Jenny got cocky when it came to some things. But Edward had never had anything to survive. Bobby had loved his little brother, and would have never had harmed him, and Edwardwas Scissorman the second time around. So, it's not like he was actually ever in any danger.
Speak of the devil...her mind bite out. She slowed to a stop just less than 20 meters south of Helen Maxwell's grave. Faced away from her, crouching and arranging the flowers on Helen's grave was Dan. So, the flowers were from him. She watched his back, deciding how to go about this meeting. The tight black of his turtle neck left little to the imagination and his body structure was amazing, she noted as she watched his muscles move under the thin fabric. The turtle neck was tucked into loose, not baggy, new black jeans, pulled over black boots. It's all he ever wore anymore. Three shades of Black, Blacker and Blackest. He'd almost considered dying his hair black once, but she'd been able to talk him out of it. But that was 4 years ago. He just disappeared for 3 years. And now, here he was.
She decided it would be best to play mourner, but keep her guard up. As she started towards him again, she was struck with a funny thought and smothered her growing grin with her glove clad hand. Dan looked so strange surrounded by all this green and lush life. He'd always reminded her of winter; Skin pale as winter clouds; cold to the touch; a smile that glowed like untouched snow at dawn; blonde hair so close to the white of snow; a voice that traveled like a winter breeze; as quiet as a valley's first snow; and when he wore that mask his eyes had been as empty and as distant as winter skies; things died around him; everything felt grey in his presence. He was winter.
Which is why it was so funny. The living incarnation of winter was sitting in one of the greenest places she'd ever been. Green, healthy, alive. Minus the dead of course, the cemetery was chalk full of life. She coughed to announce her presence just as much as to hide the laugh that threatened to choke her. Not that she had needed to make herself known; he had known she was there before she had noticed him. Hell, he probably heard me cursing on the other side of the hill she thought with mild amusement. Or he could've been aware of her the way he had been when he was Scissorman.
However he does that exactly. How had he always known where she was? He couldn't have smelt her; he would've caught her when she hid. She didn't have a tracking device on her. Sometimes, it would take him a few hours to find her, but then others times it was only 10 minutes before she saw him again. If ever she worked up the courage to tell him she knew the truth, she'd ask. Until then, she was just gonna have to except being in the dark on that subject.
Dan stood up, his tall frame blocking her few of Helen's grave. His height was contributed to by his long, long legs. He turned to face her and pushed the white-blonde strands from his more-pretty-than-handsome face. He'd tanned a little over the early summer days she could tell, but as he smiled that $1 million dollar smile, she watched his eyes. When she'd first met him she'd hardly noticed, and as Edward he had never looked her in the eye, and as Scissorman he wore that mask making his eyes look a pale blue. But now with the sun cast in them and the shyness gone, she could see his beautiful tri-coloured eyes; each pupil was lined with gold, followed by a that true blue that took up most of his iris' which was sealed with a bright, cat-green band. She recalled Bobby having something similar, only it had been red, then brown lined with purple.
As she returned the smile, Jenny was suddenly remembering a conversation she'd had with Mary Burroughs, Bobby and Dan's mother. Before Jenny had knocked the insane woman's head almost clear off with a random 2x4 she found, Mary had talked about how Daniel was "The cradle of the Star!", in other words, Bobby was far more... well, everything compared to Dan. Mary had ranted on saying Dan was an undesirable beast, deformed, ugly, a hideous creature that she "would've killed long ago, if Bobby had not loved that vile thing so much as to call it his brother". She's called him dumb, and deaf, and mentally undeveloped. She'd said she put all her effort into Bobby and Dan was all the crap left over. She then charged at Jenny, who quickly whacked her hard with the 2x4. Daniel had then spoken from what seemed to be from behind the curtains. "I don't know why she hated me" he spoke low and quietly. "I haven't done anything wrong. I do what she asks and –", he seemed to swallow a sob "- I can't help what I am. This wasn't my choice." She soon heard a door open and close. Opening the curtain, she found a locked door. She'd walked away.
Looking upon the would-be cover boy for G-Q, Jennifer truly believed that that woman had been insane. Truly mad. Jenny had seen Bobby, and she was looking at Dan. dan was the most wonderful person alive. "What is it?" Dan asked, and she blinked. Okay, so she was staring at Dan.
"Nothing, I just..." Ah, Jenny, you Silver-tongued Devil, you. "I haven't seen you in 3 years. You look great." He flinched. He always did that when he's complimented on his looks. The permanent scaring of his mother's brain washing. He was raised believing he was a disfigured beast, he didn't know how to think any other way. The wind blew, and Edward pushed the hair from his face again. It had gotten a little long. The soft, hardly visible curls touched the bottom of his ears tickling his neck, and Jenny had a sudden urge to run her hand through his hair.
"No, not really" He said, staring off to the side. It scared him when people told him how lovely he was. He didn't know how to take it. Once when they were having an argument, she'd told him if he'd kept up his attitude, she'd rearrange his pretty face. He'd stared at her for a moment before spinning around and disappearing up the stairs and to his room. "But you" he said meeting her eyes. "Look fabulous."
His stare was so sure, that she felt her face burn with a blush. "Heh, thanks..." she said softly, ducking her head down so he wouldn't see her red cheeks. Her chocolate locks spilled over her shoulders and hid her face. She looked up when her face cooled. He was still watching her, his multi-coloured eyes almost seemed to look into her soul...
"May I?" she asked gesturing to the grave with her flowers. He looked surprised for a moment, before nodding quickly and stepping out of the way. She was a little relieved to have his intense gaze broken.
She stepped forward and crouched down to the grave. She gently laid the flowers next to Dan's and smiled at the picture on the headstone. She missed Helen so much. That woman was like a sister to her, and was quickly crossing over to mother before her sudden, violent, and untimely death. And the killer was a few feet to her left. It took a lot less effort than she would've liked to have admitted to not look at him and scream 'why?'. But she fought it off, as she'd done for the last 7 years. She stared hard at the picture. Helen would never complain about frizzy gold curls after a long rain, nor would she kick the washing machine when her clothes came out faded. All of the little things that made up Helen were gone, forever lost.
Jenny felt something hot burning inside her. Revenge. She pushed the hot feeling away. Revenge was why Helen died in the first place. Only more death could come from it, and Jenny was tired of death. That and she didn't really want to kill him. What he'd done was wrong, no two ways about it. He deserved to be punished by her, but... She'd miss him, she'd regret having to do it, she'd cry over the loss, and yet... and yet.
She could feel Dan's intense gaze on her back, and she wanted to make him understand that he wasn't what his mother had said. He was so much more. She was already late for lunch with Nolan. She could live with that. "Hey, Edward, I really love how your shirt looks on you." She said in an almost sultry voice. She turned her head just a little to see him bring his arms up and hug himself.
"Really? I guess". He was getting uncomfortable. He began to rub his arms slowly.
"Yeah, really". She turned to face him head on, an almost suggestive smile on her attractive face. "And blacks a good colour for you." He shifted his wait from his right foot to his left. "Sexy". She winked.
He shook his head and looked down, his shoes becoming very interesting to him.
She stood and made the few steps towards him. Dan looked up with indecision on his face; as if he wasn't sure he should back away. As she touched his arm, he pulled away. "I mean it. You should wear this outfit more often." She smiled sweetly.
She watched confusion wash over his magical eyes. This is what she wanted. Question what you were told. She reached up for his hair. He wasn't keen on physical contact either. "Your hair's so long now." She stopped and looked back at his face, as if asking permission to touch it. He just blinked, trying to understand. She had to be quick about this. Dan would figure it out soon. He was a smart boy.
Dan could smell a lie, so she couldn't glomp him and expect him to believe she was serious. "I've always wondered if your hair was as soft as it looks" which was partial truth. He shuddered under her touch. He pulled away, though, almost afraid to enjoy it, it seemed to Jenny, and ducted down to the grave.
Shit, she thought angrily. She almost had him. Better try again. She dropped behind him. "Well, I think you're one of the best looking people I know." He cringed at 'best looking' and Jenny almost felt bad. Yet, she persisted. She was going to undo what his mother did to him. She wasn't sure why. The guilt that swells inside him would eventually kill him, she was sure. But she didn't want him to go. He was a major part of her life that she didn't want to lose again. He was link to her past that she couldn't forget, that she didn't want to forget. She remembered when she'd found herself in front of his house, shaking a little. And he'd take her in every time, and he'd let her hold him until she fell asleep. Even though skin contact terrified him and he trembled the entire night, he'd let her hold on to her past.
She slid her arms around his waist and he froze. She could feel how his muscles stiffened and his breath caught in his throat. He was scared. Touching still frightened him. She pulled herself closer to him. "Edward, it's okay", she said quietly. His shoulders were so tense; she knew he was gripping the ground hard. White knuckle, more than likely. But her reality was slipping just a little. It happened from time to time. When she dwelled to hard on the past she got dizzy and she became rather out of touch.
Jennifer was aware of all of that, but she still lost it from time to time. She just needed to do hold onto her past for bit, and if she held on a little longer she'd be okay. She knew he was apart of why she lost it temporarily, but she wasn't going to blame him -
"I'm sorry"
Jennifer blinked. She was so surprised she almost let go. She wasn't even sure she heard it, the words were so quiet. She was about to ask him if he'd said something, when her cell phone let out a loud screech. She yelped and jumped, surprising Dan as well, sending them both forward. Jenny found herself blushing furiously as she lay on top on Dan's back side. She rubbed her head with her right hand as she reached into her pocket with her left. She brought the phone out, the ringer's volume raising a few decibels. She looked at the screen. Nolan. Bah she thought, annoyed. She switched off the phone. She felt Dan shaking under her. It Jenny took her a minute to realize he was laughing.
"What?" she asked, a huge smile graced her face. He was laughing. She was lying on top of an infamous killer, while he laughed, nearly face down in Helen's grave, and she was happy for him. She'd hardly heard him laugh. And it certainly wasn't as bright and joyous as this. She rolled off him as he rolled over. She smiled at him again, and he looked up at the sky, the smile fading away. "I'm sorry" he said again.
Ah, so she hadn't imagined it. She felt a sudden wave of sadness. He'd been mentally tortured for most of his life; his mother starved him; his brother forced him to try and kill people in his place; he was kind to her; saved her life once; and just now helped her keep her sanity and he said he was sorry. It made her heart break just a little. "It's okay, Edward."
He continued to stare at the sky. "Sorry doesn't make it okay". She looked hard at him. Where was he coming from? Sorry for leaving? Sorry for lying on Helen's grave? Sorry for what exactly?
"Maybe not, but" she took his hand. "You being here shows you're sorry, Edward." She squeezed his hand he turned his head to look at her. The shadows moved over the both of them as the wind blew clouds in front of the sun and away from the sun. His tri-coloured orbs met her solid chocolate ones and locked. He was apologizing for something big. Huge. She could see it in his painfully beautiful face. He wanted her to forgive him. Really forgive him, for whatever he had done.
Jenny's eye grew wide. He was talking about the murders. How did he know she knew? Did he really expect her forgiveness? And, if so, would she give it? Could she give it? She opened her mouth to say no, but closed it just as quickly. The fact she even asked herself that question told her that, yes, she could forgive. Maybe not forget, but she could forgive. She felt him lace his fingers with hers, and she moved closer to him.
"I promise you" she said softly. "It's okay... Dan." She watched as his eyes harden, but that was short lived as his eyes became misty, the colours swirled together with tears. He shut of the show by closing his eyeslids. A few tears escaped, but Jenny managed to catch one as she placed her lips on his check. The phone rang again. No doubt it was Nolan. Jenny threw the phone.
"Your mother was wrong, you know." Jenny whispered into his ear. "You're wonderful".
And for the first time ever Dan didn't argue. "Thank you".
Authors Note: Alright, first off, you may have noticed how I used both names "Dan" and "Edward" through out this story. Almost like two different people. And, well, when you think about it, they kinda are. At least to me. Also, I'm weird and have always thought that Dan was the absolutely gorgeous one, and I don't know how that would work since he was all icky in the first one for the SNES... I'll make it work someday... And tell you all about it. ;; Lemme know if you like it, and I might just do a whole bunch of little Dan/Jenny fics.
R&R if you're up to it.
Oh, also, I kind've got off track towards the mild-end of the story. My bad. I'm just too lazy to go back and fix it. ;;
Triva time!
(You know the drill)
What character from Metal Gear Solid : Sons of Liberty said "Of Course, Jack! You must beLIEve in me!" ?
Guess if you want a cookie
