A/N: I own nothing.
An empty room. It had become a comforting sight to me over these last few years. No one to make small talk with, no one to put on that fake smile for. Though some may have found the silence uncomfortable, I welcomed it with open arms.
I wiped the table top with disgust. I never understood how people could be so messy when eating with utensils. Is that not the point of silverware? It doesn't matter though, I suppose. At the end of the day, it was my job to make sure that the diner was spotless, and I don't leave my work half done. Though I am often tempted to.
Cleaning is such tedious work that my mind tends to wander while my body takes part in the monotonous act. Today my thoughts had decided to bring up the failure that I insist on calling "my life."
I graduated high school with high honors and was accepted into a prestigious university with a full scholarship. Although, if you were to ask me now what the name of that school was, I could tell you with complete honesty that I do not remember. That's how little I cared for school.
My report card was atrocious. I wasn't aware that one could actually pull out a GPA of 0, but I indeed managed it. Not that I expected anything else since I skipped all but the first day of classes.
I didn't care. I had no motivation. I ignored my parents' pleas for me to do better, thinking that it was none of their business. And it really wasn't.
I instead went to a community college to appease the family, and earned my two year Associate's degree with fairly decent grades. I really did have every intention of continuing my education in a four year college, but…
"Edward, are you almost done?"
I sighed at the question. Such an inquiry irritated me greatly, and it could have been for a number of reasons. Perhaps it was because the one asking the question was standing at the cash register looking directly at me, and could therefore answer her own question. Then again, maybe it's because she was the owner's daughter and thought she also managed the diner.
Neither one of those reasons is true, and I'm well aware of that. I do like to delude myself on occasion.
You see, the reason Alice asked such a question of me is simple. As early as my first day of employment at this establishment, she had made it clear that she was hopelessly in love with me. Needless to say, her feelings were not reciprocated.
I wiped off the last table and turned to face her expectant gaze.
"Yes Alice, that was the last table," I said, trying not to sound too condescending. I picked up the bucket of dirty dishes and took them into the kitchen. On my way there I noticed that Alice had not gained any subtlety as of late and brushed my arm as I walked past. I ignored her, as this had become commonplace when we were alone, and continued on to place the dishes in the sink.
"Why did you start cleaning up so early anyway?" Alice asked, throwing her jet black hair behind her shoulder in some kind of overly exaggerated hair flip. "There's still half an hour until we close."
"It's not like anyone comes in this late anyway," I responded casually, trying not to let any of my irritation show.
"Well then, what do you want to do since you're done with your work and we're all alone?"
Alice tried so hard to be seductive. Honestly, she had a nice body and I'm sure most men would be falling all over her. But one of these days I'm going to lose it and tell her that she does nothing for me. Absolutely nothing.
"I was going to do the dishes for Felix so he wouldn't have to worry about them in the morning," I replied nonchalantly. At this point, I'd do anything to get away from her.
I ignored her murmurs of discontent, only vaguely hearing something about "boring ass employees" and "not knowing what he's missing."
I always found Felix's work station fascinating. The sink was positioned directly under a window, and this particular window offered the most spectacular view. Even in the darkness I could make out the soft ripples of water from the lake below. The weeping willows surrounded the lake in an almost protective stance, creating a scene I could not even conjure up in my wildest imagination.
But at the same time, there was something almost… sad about the scene. During the day, I had looked out over the same landscape and I was able to make out every detail that was currently hidden from me. The willow trees were grand, but there was an air of despair about them, as if they had lost something. It almost seemed like the trees were mourning a loss, and the lake was merely a collection of their tears.
I could not help but feel as if these trees were weeping for me. My life was a joke. I considered myself to be a classic example of one who is not living, but merely alive. I went through the daily motions of work, eat, and sleep. When my shift at the diner was over, I would go home, eat dinner, and watch TV until I feel asleep. When I woke in the morning, I would prepare for work and head to the diner.
Such was my life for the last three years. I had no friends. I didn't want any. I never did see the point in "friendship." I didn't long for others' company the way so many people did. I was content being left alone. I was content without the company of friends or family.
I was not, however, content with the current state of my life. I didn't want to be working at a diner. The owners were kind people, but this simply was not what I had imagined as a career for myself. Truth be told, I didn't have the slightest clue as to what I actually wanted to do. I didn't even know where to start. So I settled for the comfortable routine I had fallen into here.
My phone vibrated in my front pocket and I was actually thankful for the distraction. My thoughts had a way of overcoming me when I was left alone with them. I looked at my phone to see a new text message from Emmett.
Emmett was perhaps the closest thing I had to a friend. He lived in the apartment next to mine, and made it a point to try and talk to me. He was a nice enough guy, and my opposite in every way. He was buff. I was almost certain he rented his apartment for show and slept at the gym. He was outgoing, more so than I felt any human being should be. He was… likeable, for lack of a better word.
I'm not terribly scrawny, though to say I'm muscular would be stretching the truth quite a bit. My bronze hair could not be styled even if you threatened it with a lit match. My eyes were my only feature that ever received compliments, and I didn't really understand where the compliments came from. When I looked in the mirror, I saw normal looking green eyes.
And I'm not… likeable. I didn't make any effort to talk to people or make them feel at home the way Emmett did. I could say I envied him. Not for his social life, but rather for the ability to be social. It's something I always wished I had.
I returned my attention to the text message. Emmett asked if I would go to a party with him later that night. He had been asking me for some time, but my answer remained the same. Tonight was even easier than usual to decline, as it was Thursday and I had to work tomorrow. I relayed this information to him and put my phone back in my pocket.
As I continued washing the dishes, I heard the soft jingle of the wind chimes near the door. Slightly annoyed by such a late night visitor, I turned around to see who would be walking into a diner this close to closing.
It wasn't the silky blond hair that cascaded over his face that caused me to stare. It also had nothing to do with the way his clothes hugged his body in just the right places.
It was the look in his eyes. The two deep pools of blue looked curiously around the establishment, making him seem as if he were a child trying to make sense of his surroundings. But he didn't appear terribly interested in the decor. He seemed to trying to make sense of something I could not see.
His eyes finally turned upon me, and it was all I could do to avoid flinching under such a powerful gaze. He didn't appear to be looking at me. He seemed to be looking into me. I felt as if everything I had ever done in my life, both the good and the bad, were clear to him in this very moment.
I shifted my eyes ever so slightly to avoid collapsing under the strain of his scrutiny and noticed a motorcycle helmet under his arm. He wore a leather jacket, completing his biker look fully. I momentarily allowed myself to fantasize about owning a motorcycle and riding through the open road without a care.
I quickly reminded myself that he was a customer and that I had a job to do. I began walking over to the cash register when Alice pushed past me.
Leave it to her to only work when she took an interest in the customer. I sighed and stepped back to the sink. But I had no intention of continuing on with the dishes. I turned to look out the window and waited to hear the voice of the mysterious creature that wandered in on such an uneventful night.
"Well hello there," Alive practically purred, in what she probably thought was her most seductive voice. It wasn't seductive. Not even close.
"Howdy, ma'am," the man replied, tipping his invisible hat to her. I nearly fell over at the southern accent. I always was a sucker for that. I thanked the calming effect that the view outside the window had on me. Without it, I'm sure I would've actually fallen over or made a fool out of myself in some other way.
I looked at the man out of the corner of my eye and was rather intrigued by what I now saw. When Alice had first arrived at the cash register, he had given her the same penetrating gaze he had given me, but that was now replaced by a look of… indifference? It didn't really appear that he was indifferent, but his eyes no longer seemed to be looking into the very depths of your soul. They appeared almost normal now.
He looked over the menu while Alice continued to engage him in small talk. From their conversation, I learned that he grew up in Texas but lived here in Washington. He was returning from a cross country trip and this was his last stop before heading home.
I found myself anxious to learn more about him. Which was strange, considering that the last time I felt this way about someone was… never. I didn't really care about the lives of others and didn't understand the need some people had to announce each and every little detail about themselves to the world. And yet I found myself hanging on to this man's every word.
I had to stifle a laugh when I heard him ask for the kid's pizza. I usually ridiculed adults that ordered food from the kid's menu, but he just looked so adorable when he asked for it.
Alice handed me the order slip and I was relieved that his order was a relatively simple one. I wasn't sure if I was up to anything complicated this close to the end of my shift. In fact, I'd normally be incessantly whining about people who come to a diner near closing time and expect to get served. I found that I didn't mind cooking for this man at all.
Alice turned and walked over to the register to continue her discussion with the man. I looked out the window once more, never tiring of the effect such a scene had on me. As I turned toward the oven, the man's eyes caught mine and for that brief moment, the penetrating gaze had returned. It was as if he was searching for something within me that he had yet to find. I shuddered slightly and busied myself preparing his meal.
I stood by the oven, lost in my thoughts until I heard the familiar beeping sound, indicating that the food was ready. I removed the pizza from the oven and had the fleeting thought to arrange the pepperonis into a smiley face. I chuckled quietly at my own ridiculous idea and simply placed the pizza as is onto the plate.
As I neared the front to serve the man, Alice quickly swiped the dish from my hands and set it on the counter in front of him. She then proceeded to continue her conversation, though it was now one sided.
He looked even more adorable than he had before as he eyed the pizza with absolute delight. He seemed to take pleasure in the smallest things, something I had always wished I was capable of.
I returned to the food preparation area to ensure that the place was thoroughly cleaned up and then proceeded to finish the dishes.
Satisfied with the state of the kitchen, I went to the cash register and sat down, pretending to be busy so that the man would not feel rushed. Alice shot me a dirty look, and I wondered what she could possibly be so angry about. Her conversation had been one sided for ten minutes now while the man ate.
Just as I was about to say something to her, her phone rang. She picked up the cell phone and when her mother asked her where she was, she sounded like the epitome of a teenage girl. She asked why her mother needed to know, told her it was none of her business, and so on and so forth. The man and I both tried unsuccessfully to contain our laughter and Alice quickly fled outside upon realizing this.
Upon finishing his meal, the man stood up and picked up his jacket from the seat next to him. I took his dishes to the sink and decided that Felix could deal with a bit of dish washing, especially since I did the majority of his work for him.
I came back to the cash register as the man reached for his wallet and pulled out enough cash to cover his meal. He left a generous tip and turned toward the door. I was still working the register when I heard him speak.
"That's a breathtaking view out that window isn't it?"
My head jerked up instantly, although it took me a moment to realize that he was indeed speaking to me. He was leaning against the counter looking at the door. I tried unsuccessfully to come up with a response before he continued.
"The one you were looking out of from the kitchen I mean," he said, now turning to look directly into my eyes. His gaze was now more powerful than it had been before. But I could see the hint of something behind that gaze. I wanted to say it was sadness, but I don't believe that a creature as magnificent as this would be harboring such an emotion.
"It is. The calming effect it has on me is like nothing I've ever experienced," I told him. I was slightly taken aback by the fact that I told him that. It was as if I'd revealed a secret meant to remain between the lake and myself. I peered through the window at the scene we discussed.
Something was different. Even in the darkness I could see ripples forming on the surface of the lake. As far back as I could remember the lake had always remained perfectly still. But now, the water had begun moving, and the ripples only grew stronger as I continued to watch the magnificent scene.
"Why do you look at it with such hopelessness? It doesn't suit you."
I turned to look at him, only vaguely aware that my gaze had shifted to the window. I didn't understand what he was getting at. I'm not hopeless, I'm perfectly content. Mostly.
As if reading my thoughts, he held my gaze and said "There's a difference between being content and being happy. I can tell that you think you're content with your life, but I don't think you're happy. And maybe the look in your eyes is because ya don't think you can really be happy. But that ain't true."
I couldn't speak right now even if I wanted to. How could this man, who I had exchanged no more than a few words with, see so deeply into my soul? How can he possibly know so much about who I am?
He sighed. "Chase what makes ya happy. Eyes like those shouldn't be marred by sadness. Life's too short to just let it pass ya by."
He finally turned to pick up his helmet and then exited the diner without looking back. I continued to stare at the door, unsure what to make of the situation. Of one thing I could be certain; something had changed.
A few minutes later Alice walked in yelling about parents and curfews. She started picking up her things and readied the diner for closing. Right before she left, she handed me a folded piece of paper.
"Here, that guy gave it to me and asked me to give it to you."
"What is it?"
"How should I know? It was too dark outside to read." And with that, she went through the door.
I chuckled at the fact that she tried to read it and felt no shame about admitting it. I opened the piece of paper to see what this mysterious man had written for me.
Under the brief message was his phone number.
"Chase what makes you happy. And if you need someone to chase it with you, I'll be there.
Jasper Whitlock"
