Hey there, I'm LastGirlOnTheWrite. I've been wanting to do one of these for a while now. This is my first fanfiction, so I hope everyone likes it. I've always had a soft spot for gender-bender stories, and once I got this idea in my head I just couldn't stop myself. I hope everyone will forgive me for what I'm about to do to poor Ichigo! ^_^

I do not own Bleach or any of the characters therein.

Summary: Urahara makes Ichigo an offer he can't pass up. Help him with an experiment for the SWA in return for Kido training. How bad could it be? Little does Ichigo know, he is about to learn far more about the opposite sex than he would ever want to… by becoming one of them!


"URAHARA!"

Sometimes, Ichigo Kurosaki simply could not believe his luck. Even after stopping Aizen and his cohorts, life was still one big hassle after another. As if trying to keep up with school while dealing with the everyday hollow attacks wasn't enough of a bother, Ichigo would still find some way to get himself buried neck deep into whatever problem the cosmos had cooked up for him that month. Some days all he could think was that whatever gods governed the universe were screwing up his life on purpose all for the sake of their own amusement.

Today was definitely one of those days.


Everything had started off so innocently…

The war was over, and life in general had gone back to normal. It was a quiet Sunday in early February, and for once Ichigo actually had the house to himself. No neurotic dad, no pestering sisters, no annoying soul reapers… just Ichigo by himself enjoying a little peace and quiet. It was well past noon, and Ichigo had managed to finish his homework over an hour ago. With all the extra work he had been putting in lately, what with his soul reaper duties and extra credit assignments to salvage his grades, Ichigo honestly felt that he deserved a day to just lie about and relax.

And then the phone rang.

It was normal enough. Just a phone call, nothing out of the ordinary.

Ichigo could not have been more wrong.

He got up off of his bed and meandered downstairs to the phone. Answering with a stifled yawn, Ichigo was surprised to find out that Urahara was on the other line. The conversation was quick and basic. Urahara needed Ichigo's help with something, and wanted the substitute to come over and give him a hand. A little voice in the back of Ichigo's mind tried to warn him against it, but he just shrugged it off as laziness and agreed to come over. After all, it's not like he had anything better to do with his day. And as much as he may hate to admit it, Ichigo still felt like he owed Urahara for his help in the past. If pitching in every once in a while would ease his conscience, then that's what he would have to do.

The trip to the shoten was a pleasant one. Winter had passed and spring was well on its way. The sky reminded him of his inner world the few times he had been there; a brilliant blue with a few lazy clouds strolling by.

He had no idea that it was the calm before the storm.

It wasn't until Ichigo rounded the last corner and the shoten came into sight that he first started to feel uneasy. The shop itself was just as it always was, but for some reason Ichigo could not shake this strange feeling that he had in the pit of his stomach.

Something just wasn't quite right.

Before Ichigo could think about what was feeling off to him the shoten door slid open, revealing a rather enthusiastic Kisuke Urahara.

"Kurosaki-san!" He practically squealed, "I'm so very glad you could come on such short notice! Please come inside! "

Despite the nagging feeling in the back of his mind, Ichigo followed Urahara into the shoten, closing the door behind him.

"I do apologize for calling you in like that, but unfortunately Tessai, Ururu and Jinta had to go out on some important business earlier today and they won't be back for quite a while yet, so the only person I had left to call on for help was you, dear Kurosaki-san!"

Ichigo recognized the tone of voice Urahara was using. It was that 'I'm going to be as sweet as possible so you'll do whatever I say no matter how strange it may sound…' tone. That little voice in his head and the funny feeling he had in his gut earlier were starting to make a whole lot more sense now.

I'm not going to like this, I can already tell… Ichigo sighed, frowning a bit more deeply. He began to wonder if he could somehow get out of helping the slightly cracked scientist without looking like a total schmuck. Not likely

Resigning himself, Ichigo decided that he better get his over with as quickly and with as little mental scaring as possible.

"Alright Urahara, what are you up to?"

"Come now, Kurosaki-san, what makes you think I'm up to something?"

"Urahara, when are you not up to something?"

"Ah… touché…"

"So, are you going to tell me, or am I going home?"

"Alright, alright, " Urahara explained with a slightly hitch in his voice,"…I am up to something, but it's nothing major. Just a little experiment I've been working on for the SWA. I've almost got it finished, but I need to test it, and you are the perfect candidate!"

"Oh, hell no!"

The moment the words experiment and test came out of Urahara's mouth Ichigo wanted nothing more than to run screaming.

"Urahara, I am not a lab rat, and if you think I'm going to…"

"I'll make it worth your while…"

Ichigo stopped for a moment. He shouldn't have. He should have been running out the door. But there he was, actually wondering what Urahara had up his sleeves this time.

"Okay, spill. What exactly do you think is going to entice me enough to let you use me as your beta test?"

"Here's the deal," Urahara was practically beaming with excitement. He knew that once Ichigo heard what he had planned there would be no way the substitute soul reaper would say no, "… the experiment itself is relatively harmless and the side-effects last for one month. During that month you will be monitored remotely while going about your everyday life. In return for your services, I will offer you a trade. You do this for me, and I will personally train you in Kido and in controlling that massive rietsu of yours. So, what do you say? Just one month of helping me with this and you'll be able to learn skills that could help you for the rest of your life and afterlife! Well? What do you think!?"

Ichigo was slightly speechless. He had been thinking of finding someone to teach him how to use Kido for a while now, but the list of candidates was infuriatingly short. He didn't want to ask Rukia, mostly because of the fact that the midget's idea of training was to gripe, yell at him, draw horrible pictures as visual aids, and then beat him with the sketchbook. For a while he considered asking the Visored, but decided against that too, since he really didn't want to deal with them constantly ribbing him over every little thing. He also didn't want to deal with that snaggletooth, Hiyori. He'd had quite enough of her the first time around. The only other person readily available was Kisuke Urahara...

The idea of being the test subject for some experiment did not sit well with him at all… but getting to learn Kido might be worth the risk. Later, Ichigo would attribute his response to a bout of temporary insanity, but at the moment he was seriously considering the clog-wearing merchant's offer. It was only a month, after all. How bad could it be?

Then he realized that if Urahara was willing to teach him, then maybe he would teach someone else too. After all, Ichigo wasn't the only one who wanted to get stronger. Maybe if he haggled a bit…

Urahara waited patiently as the orange haired substitute soul reaper pensively considered his offer. After all, contrary to popular belief, the boy wasn't stupid. He'd proven that many times in the past. Impatient and reckless maybe, but most certainly not stupid. The potential gains from learning Kido were too great for even someone as powerful as Ichigo to ignore. He would take the offer. Kisuke was certain of it.

"Alright Urahara. I'm probably gonna regret this, but I'll do it on one condition."

Kisuke Urahara was practically bursting at the seams with excitement. The SWA was paying big money for this little experiment. He was going to make a fortune off of this… not that he would tell Ichigo that…

"Alright, what is this condition of yours, Kurosaki-san?"

Ichigo couldn't stop the slight flush that rose to his cheeks as he looked away from Urahara for just a second before taking a steadying breath. Rubbing the back of his neck a bit before sighing, he blurted out his only demand.

"I want you to teach Inoue too."

Urahara's eyebrows vanished under his hat as he looked at Ichigo with mild surprise. Of all the demands the young man could make, that most certainly was not one he was expecting. He had begun to suspect that the substitute soul reaper had a bit of a soft spot for the young healer. Curiosity got the better of the shady merchant, and he just couldn't help but voice the obvious question.

"May I ask why?"

Ichigo dropped his gaze to the floor as he let out a long sigh. How was he going to explain this? It wasn't like he wanted to put Inoue in danger; he had learned firsthand that she was quite capable of doing that herself. It was just that she really wasn't much of a fighter. Sure, she had Tsubaki, but the little guy can only do so much, and if that Hueco Mundo fiasco was any indication, she needed more options than just attack, shield, and heal. Wait… that's it!

"She needs more options. Kido will give her that, right?"

Keisuke nodded, and couldn't help but smile a little at the young man in front of him. Maybe, he mused to himself, there's hope for him after all…

"Kido will most certainly give Inoue-san more options to defend herself with. Very well, I accept your condition. So, do we have a deal?"

Ichigo shook his head before huffing out another sigh. I just know I'm going to regret this…

"We have a deal."


Ichigo looked down at the strange bracelet Urahara had tightly strapped to his wrist with open contempt.

"Urahara-san, why exactly do I have to wear this thing, again?"

Ichigo was standing in the underground training area beneath the Urahara Shoten in his soul reaper form, leaving his body upstairs at Kisuke's request. On his wrist was a silver bracelet with no visible clasp. It was thin and demure, something that a girl might wear. Definitely not something Ichigo Kurosaki, substitute soul reaper and closet superhero should be wearing.

"Kurosaki-san, that bracelet is the key to this entire experiment! It will monitor and record everything that happens during the experiment and the month that follows. Once the month is over and the side-effects cease you absolutely must bring that bracelet back to me. Otherwise, this will have been a complete waste of time for the both of us."

"Okay, okay, I get it! Bracelet important; don't lose it. Alright, so let's get this over with already. What do you need me to do?"

"Eager as ever, I see! Very well then… take this."

Urahara handed Ichigo a red box with a small white tab in the front. The box itself was light, almost as though it were empty inside.

"Alright Ichigo, listen carefully. I'm going to observe the experiment from a distance, so once I leave I want you to count to sixty, and then pull out the white tab and lift the lid."

"… That's it?"

"That's it!"

"So… just pull the tab?"

"And lift the lid."

"Okay… seems simple enough…"

"Yup."

"Well," Ichigo sighed, he seemed to be doing that a lot today "… I guess we should get this started, right?"

"Oh! Yes, of course. I'll be going then…"

With that, Urahara quickly flash stepped to safety, well out of the range of his experiment.

"Okay…" Ichigo mused to himself. "I guess I should start counting."


After sixty seconds, Ichigo tentatively did as instructed. First, he gently pulled out the white tab, which disintegrated as soon as it came free of the box.

"Freaky…" Ichigo mumbled as he moved his hand to lift the lid on the innocent looking red box.

"This is some weird experiment. I mean honestly, what could Urahara possibly fit into such a tiny…"

Ichigo didn't get to finish that sentence, for at that particular moment he lifted the lid and was instantly engulfed in a searing white explosion that sent him catapulting back dozens of feet, leaving him unconscious on the ground.


Elsewhere, hiding behind one of the larger rock mounds of his training area, a very excited Kisuke Urahara was conversing with a highly amused Yoruichi Shihoin.

"You actually got him to do it?"

"Yes I did."

"How!?"

"I made him an offer he couldn't refuse."

Yoruichi giggled at the thought of what Ichigo had just gotten himself into. Who would have thought that he would agree to…

"Kisuke… did you… tell him what the box does?"

"Ha…ha… nope!"

"Oh… Kisuke..." Yoruichi stared at Urahara with a mixture of shock and amusement.

"When he wakes up he is going to kill you!"


Killing Kisuke Urahara was definitely up there on his to-do list.

Ichigo was sprawled on his back a good thirty feet from where he had been standing, just barely returning to consciousness. His entire body felt slightly numb and everything was still spinning from the explosion. Glancing up from his prone position, Ichigo was able to make out the slowly approaching form of the soon-to-be-deceased shop owner, joined by a jovial Yoruichi.

"Wow, Kisuke, you've really out-done yourself this time…"

"I have indeed! I can't wait to see what the Soul Reaper Women's Assosiation does with this new product."

"Oh… those poor boys won't know what hit them…"

Ichigo could practically feel the smugness rolling off of the two spectators, and he just knew that they were mocking him in some way. After all, what the hell kind of experiment was this anyway!? How hard was it to make a box blow up in someone's face? Ichigo couldn't help but think that he was just the butt of some obscure joke, and he wasn't going to take it for a second longer!

"URAHARA!"

Said shopkeeper yelped in surprise. He wasn't expecting the teen to be conscious already. Kisuke saw the murderous glint in Ichigo's eyes, and knew that if he didn't find some way to placate the youth quickly he was going to be running for his life in a few seconds…

"N..now Ichigo… just remember that you agreed to this before-hand, and that it's only for one month and then you should change back but if you don't then you're going to need me to fix…"

The next few words were caught in Urahara's mouth. During his self-preservation speech, Ichigo had rolled to his stomach and pushed himself up, unknowingly letting the front of his shihakusho fall forward as he did, still too numb to notice the slight difference in his figure. He was still staring at Urahara with that I-am-going-to-kill-you look when Yoruichi was assailed by a fit of giggles, but at that particular moment Kisuke wasn't too concerned. He was too busy enjoying the view.

Ichigo was about to begin his crusade against all things Urahara when he noticed Yoruichi behind said dead-man, doubled over laughing. Irritation set in again, to be replaced by curiosity when the substitute soul reaper's eyes ghosted over the face of perverted shopkeeper. He'd seen a lot of the faces Kisuke could make, but this one was completely new. It reminded him of a starving man about to be served his first meal in weeks.

Ichigo was confused. Why was Urahara staring at him like that… and why was he drooling? Curiosity got the better of the teen, and he casually glanced down at himself. Weird, he thought, why does it look like I have…

Realization hit Ichigo like a brick wall. Tentatively, he reached up for the hem of his shihakusho, and gently pulled the fabric forward, giving himself an excellent view of a pair of large and oddly tanned breasts. This alone was shocking, but before Ichigo could properly whip himself into the righteous fury necessary for smiting one Kisuke Urahara, the previous numbness finished receding, and Ichigo noticed that along with his new additions there was a conspicuous absence as well. Before he could stop himself his hand snaked down to his groin, only to find smooth skin where a certain something should have been.

It was too much. Faced with such an impossible and ridiculous situation as this, Ichigo Kurosaki did the only thing any self-respecting teenager could do…

He fainted.


Well, that's it for the first chapter. I hope you enjoyed it. ^_^