That '80s Show

That '80s Pilot

Season 1, Episode 1

We join Eric Forman in the basement looking around, taking in his memories, on January 1st 1980.

"Man, it's gonna be hard to leave this again." He uttered to himself.

Eric sluggishly moved to his couch and rubbed it with his right hand, feeling its tingly fabrics. Eric proceeded to walk around the couch and take a seat on the left side, where he always seated himself. He closed his eyes and took a trip down memory lane. All ranging from Red calling him a dumbass to every kiss he had with Donna to Hyde's unmistakable laugh. Eric could feel Donna sitting beside him and Hyde to his left in that chair he always claimed with arms crossed and staring at the television, Kelso sitting to Donna's right and Jackie sitting on his lap, and of course Fez sitting in the chair to the couch's right where he'd eat vast amounts of candy and look at nudity magazines. Eric sighed and wished he didn't have to leave.

Meanwhile, Kitty and Red are in the kitchen, when come in the middle of an argument.

"Kitty, I'm not budging on my decision. The boy needs to go back. He made the decision to go to Africa; he needs to follow through with it. Be a man!" Red stated, sitting in his chair near the wall and a newspaper in hand.

"Well, every man needs a break too." Kitty returned, she standing by the oven.

"A break? Did the Koreans give me a break when they were hammering my teammates down with machine gun? No!" Red played the veteran card.

Kitty shook her head and replied, "Well, we're talking about to different things, Red. You're talking about war and I'm talking about my son going back to Africa."

Red stood and said, "Kitty, he's my son too. And I think Eric should go back to Africa, follow through with his goal that he set for himself. It'd be good for him."

Kitty tilted he head down and began, "Okay, Red. If you think it'll be good for him. I mean father knows best, right? You know, getting ate by lions and scorpions stinging him. It'll all be good for him."

"Kitty don't do this!" Red asked with a sigh.

"Don't do what? I'm just agreeing with you and moving frantically." Kitty's voice picked up, "Let's just ship our son back to the frigging jungles of frigging Africa! And let the cannibals eat him! God, Red, you're such a good parent! It's no wonder why Eric looks up to you!"

"Okay, okay." Red stopped her and sighed, "Alright … Eric can stay."

"Oh, Red, I knew I could count on you." She gave him a hug and kissed him.

"But what about school? Eric wants to become a teacher and he doesn't have the money. That's why he went to Africa in the first place." Red asked.

" … Well, you did get a big from that muffler company." Kitty reminded him.

"Kitty, I'm using that for my retirement. I can't go giving that to Eric to blow on college."

Kitty simply gave Red a hard look which Red easily submitted under.

"Fine! But I'm picking a cheap college and I mean real cheap. If he's staying there's going to be some negativities to it." Red stated.

Kitty smiled and stated, "Wouldn't have it any other way."

The sounds of footsteps came fluttering out of basement followed by Eric. Red saw him and told him to take a seat. Eric, confused, did so.

"Son," Red started, "Did you enjoy your stay for New Years?"

"Yeah, it was great." Eric stated.

"Good, good. Because Kitty and … the basement misses … you." Red voice trailed.

"The basement, Red?" Eric asked smiling.

"Shut up, dumbass. Anyhow, we wanted to know if you want to stay home."

"Well, god, yes of course I would, but I got to go back to Africa so I can attend college." Eric confessed.

"Okay, son, here's the deal, I'll pay for your school with my some of my retirement money and you can stay. But be forewarned; I'm going cheap! That means I'm picking a cheap school and a cheap program. Aright?"

Eric hopped up, "This is great! Oh, thank you, daddy!" He ran over and embraced his father. Red stood there shocked and nervous, afraid to return Eric's hug. Eric stopped, and said, "Oh, man. I gotta tell Donna. Again, thank you!"

"Well, you're welcome, Eric." Raid said with a smirk.

Eric ran to the sliding glass door, opened it and shouted, "Hello Point Place!" and ran out with a "Woot!"

Kitty smiled at Red and said, "Now I'm gonna make you some fudge brownies that's as sweet as you." She gave him another kiss.

Red laughed, "Yeah, I guess it'll be nice to have the dumbass back. I need someone to mow the lawn."

Scene changes to Fez and Jackie making out in Hyde's record store on the couch, Leo and Hyde are at the register making crude comments.

"Hey," Hyde shouted to them, "just because we got a hippie here doesn't mean we have free love going on. You should at least pay me."

"You know, Steven, I think you're just jealous because Fez is a better kisser than you." Jackie implied.

"What can I say? I have a devilish tongue!" Fez agreed

"Hey, man," Leo started, "How come you guys aren't hanging out with Skinny Man? Isn't he supposed to be going back to Africa?"

"You mean Forman? Nah, he'll be fine."

Fez looked at Hyde and commented, "You don't want to hang out with Eric?"

"I got a store to run, man. He'll be fine." Hyde stated.

"Steven, it's January 1st, there's no stores open, beside yours." Jackie added.

"Hey, when all those stores fail, I'll still be open! It'll be like … Y2K in twenty years! The world will end and I'll still be standing!"

Leo looked at Hyde, "You're whacked out, man."

"Well, do whatever want. As for me, I'm going to find Eric. You want to come, honey?"

"Why, yes I do." Jackie agreed.

The couple leaves with Hyde and Leo still standing by the register.

"Hey, man. How come you're not going with Loud Girl and Foreign Dude? It's gotta be more than the store, man." Asked Leo.

"Alright, man. You want to know? It's because it'll make it somewhat hard on me to see Forman leave again, okay? I mean, it sucks seeing Forman leave. Nothings the same without him. Hell, even The Circle is a little boring!" Hyde admitted.

"You mean, it's hard to say good bye, man?" Leo asked.

"Yeah, I guess …" Hyde said with a little embarrassment.

"It's not about you, Hyde. It's about Skinny Man." Leo stopped with a space-out look on his face and added, "Hey, Hyde, guess what? Loud Girl and Foreign Dude went to go see Skinny Man!"

Scene switches to Donna silently crying in her room with her sadden by Eric and the thought of him having to leave once again. A knock on the door arose and in come Eric.

"Hey." Eric greeted.

"Hey." Donna also greeted.

"You okay?" Eric asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine …. It just sucks that you got to leave again." Donna admitted.

"Yeah, I know. I really missed you, Donna."

"I missed you too. Things are really different when you're gone. And … I don't like it."

"I don't like it, either." Eric added.

They kiss and embrace each other, enjoying the moment they have together. Eric put his head to her ear and whispered, "I got something to tell you."

"What is it?" Donna asked.

"I'm not going back to Africa!" Eric still whispered.

"What?!" Donna jumped back, "Are you serious?!"

"Yeah, my dad decided to help pay for my college. Although, he said he was going cheap - he stressed that part." Eric announced.

"That's great. So, you're staying in Point Place?" Donna asked.

"Yep." Eric answered with a smile.

Donna brought him close, Eric tilted his head and their lips locked with their tongues dancing with each other like snakes in desert. A heated kiss filled with passion and lust. However, even the most romantic situations have to end. The door swung open and in came Randy Pearson with flowers in hand saying, "Look, Donna, I know we decided to stay friends but how abo-" Randy stopped when he noticed Eric, "Who's he?!"

Eric also asked, "Who the hell is he?!"

Donna without thinking shouted, "Randy?!"

Eric asked, "Who's Randy?!"

Randy answered, "I'm Randy! Who are you?"

"I'm Eric Forman."

"Oh, Eric … Yeah, I heard a lot about you. So, how's it going Jungle Boy?" Randy mocked.

"Jungle Boy? What? Argh … What's with the flowers?" Eric asked.

"These? I was going to give them to Donna and see if I can win her back." Randy confessed.

"Well, you can't! She's mine!" Eric stated.

"Okay …"

"Yeah? Well, you're a … wait, did you just say 'okay'?"

"Yeah, I'm not going to fight over some woman. I can get anyone I want." Randy handed Eric the flowers and smiled, "See you around Donna. Nice meeting you Eric." With that, he departed.

Eric closed the door and asked, "Who was that?"

"That was Randy Pearson, he and I went out for a while when you were in Africa. You're not mad, are you?" Donna answered.

Eric sighed and said, "No … just as long as I don't have see his crazy hair anymore."

"That might be a problem." Donna stated.

"Why?" Eric asked.

"He's kind of … one of the gang."

Eric flopped on the bed saying, "I hate new guys."

Scene switches to Eric's basement where Kelso is found playing Pong with small paddles. Fez and Jackie walk in.

"Michael? I thought you went back to Chicago." Jackie told.

"Nah, I decided to stay down here for a while. I was looking for Eric, but I found this old game instead. I still remember making the paddles small." Kelso explained.

"So, when are you going back to Chicago?" Fez asked.

"In a few days. But I want to hang out with my friends. Pong anyone?" Kelso offered.

Fez picked up a controller and Jackie watched as Fez beat Kelso with ease.

"Damn it! How do you play so good?" Kelso shouted.

"In my country I am the Pong King!" Fez stated.

"And in my country he's The King period." Jackie also stated and gave a hug around his head.

Hyde came in and saw Kelso, "Hey, man, you're still here?"

"Yeah, decided to stick around for a while." Kelso repeated.

"Cool, did Forman leave already?" Hyde asked.

"I guess, I just began to play pong." Kelso said.

"Damn …" Hyde said to himself.

In walked Eric and Donna.

"Woah! One thing seemed to stay the same; even if I'm gone everyone still crowds my basement." Stated Eric.

"Oh, man, I thought you left." Hyde admitted.

"No! And guess what I'm not going back to Africa! Yeah, Red decided to pay for my school."

Everyone in the basement cheered for him.

Hyde smiled and said, "That's great Forman. This calls for a celebration."

The Circle is created.

Hyde laughs and says, "Congratulation Forman."

"Thanks Hyde." Eric said, "God, you know, it feels great to finally be back. You know? I'm home! Hello Wisconsin!"

"Yeah, Eric, we missed you. It must be great to be back in America after all that time in the jungles. I know I felt great." Fez said.

"Hey, honey," Jackie began, "Where are you from anyhow?"

Fez falls asleep.

"Little trooper, looks like he had too much." Kelso commented and stayed quite for three second and then began laughing.

"Kelso, what are you laughing about?" Donna asked.

While laughing, "I don't know!"

"You're crazy, man." Donna said and looked at her hands, "Man, my hands are huge! Eric, I could crush you with these!"

"That wouldn't be good, Donna. I'm skinny enough." Eric stated.

Hyde smiled and said, "You know what this reminds me of? This car …. And it runs on water, man! Water! I need to get me one of those!"

Kelso continued to laugh.

End.

License plate: Jan 80