Courtney

I won't believe it.

No, my mind refuses to believe it.

My brain refuses to process the sight of them...doing what they did.

Am I going crazy? Has the calm cold Courtney completely left the building?

'Three sleepless night down, a lifetime to go'...

I slammed my diary shut and tossed it on the nightstand by my bed. My hand ran through my hair as I sighed in an effort to call my nerves and hold back the tears.

Hopeless

The warm liquid ran down my cheeks and soaked through my blankets. Warm angry tears swam anew on my cold skin.

Cold

Cold. How could I ever be warm again? When the being that gave me warmth left me all alone. All alone in this cold world...God I'm pathetic.

I leaned beside me and picked up my laptop. I always kept it close to me on my bed. I opened it and pressed the power button.

The brightness of the screen overpowered the darkest of the recent events and for a moment I was numb from all the pain they put me through.

Pain

All the pain and it is not even over yet.

I typed in my password. It was his name. My whole life for two years revolved only on him. Making him happy...keeping him out of trouble...loving him even when I couldn't love myself. I made a few mistakes but I'm human. But, I guess I made one to many..

Maybe this is the reason I'm suffering?

I clicked the Internet icon, and my home page appeared, Total Drama News. I used it as a reference like most people did. To see how the losers were doing and how all the relationship drama was folding.

Relationship drama

A nightmare that will never end.

The picture and the top story were against my hopes of finding happiness. They were of him and her...kissing.

The same him who I gave my heart to. And the same her who I gave my friendship to.

I held back the tears with a bit lip refusing to shred another one. Refusing to let him make me cry again.

Happy couple? Ehh.. to alike. Duncan is different...so he NEEDS different.

But he will understand that later.

I wonder how Trent is getting through this. At least they weren't dating.

Pity

Pity. A new emotion for me? No, I pitied all this week, self-pity. But this time it was pity for another being. Pity for another sad lonely soul in this world. And the thought my heart could alone pity for another made me smile.

I clicked on Trent's tab at the top of the page. A red puffy eyed picture of Trent came to view. He was never one to lug about with sadness. He never seemed to let anything get him down. He threw the challenge for the girl he loved, and left with a smile and an open heart.

What becomes for the open-hearted? What becomes of their soul?

Hmm... I went from pathetic to a poet in under an hour. Maybe this whole Duncan thing will be okay after all.

Acceptance

This is a step. A step down the right path in life. A step to finding myself again. A step that will follow another and another until I am lead out of this dark path of life. A step I eagerly take.

The picture of Trent proved too painful to look at. And I couldn't bring myself to read the latest news on him. I couldn't even bring myself to text him to see how he was doing, as if I needed to.

I'm tired of thinking I am tired of processing thoughts through my head. I need to get some fresh air.

I shut my laptop gently and place it on the nearby pillow. There was a park a few blocks away that I normally walk to when I am down and even though it is midnight my mind thinks fresh air will help.

And I have to agree.

So I put on some sneakers and a light blue jacket and walked out of my room and down the stairs. My parents are gone. My parents are always gone. I am alone in my thoughts as well as in real life.

I locked the door and started from the porch steps to the sidewalk, walking east in a slow calm walk. Street lights help guide me along the stained concrete and a few seconds later, the black metal park gate comes to view.

Who ever though of opening a park 24 hours was a genius.

I slipped in through the unlocked gates and put the doors back in place, in hopes of being alone.

The flowers are the only company I need.

And as I walked deeper in the park floral scents attacked my nostrils and demanded entry. I happily agreed and let the smells drown out m probelms...fake friends and bad boyfriends alike. I felt something I hadn't in a while...peace.

Peace

Perhaps steps two down the right road? I mean peace comes from an enlighten heart right? Was my broken heart rebuilding itself?

Hope

Step three down. Maybe this is easier than I thought?

"Freedom"

My irises are red.

Skin pale and veins a tempting dark purple

My pupils are probably invisible by now. I haven't eaten in days. I miss the sweet taste of blood and how it warms up on cold body as it travels from my throat downward. I mis...

What is this? A girl walking alone in a park at midnight? Interesting...

I fly in the cool damp late summer air. Swooping skillfully in between the tree branches to keep an eye on this mystery. I could tell she wasn't paying attention. I could hear her thinking and the scent of heartbreak made my mouth water.

I don't know how much longer I could take this. The scent from her is killing me. I MUST feed...on her.

I landed behind her silently, pulling my black hood up in an effort to hide my face but most importantly my eyes. I step up beside the girl and smile at her.

"Hey"

"Oh..I..I am sorry I didn't see you there... Hi."

"It's okay. Are you thinking about something?"

"Haha, yeah. Just a lot of stress lately."

"I understand. I can help you if you want."

"Help me with what?"

"I can relieve your stress...I can give you freedom."

Courtney

A strange boy with a hood is telling me he can free my soul. I shouldn't do this.

"Come on. Let me free your soul. Friends help each other...and we are friends... Aren't we?"

Should I? I was happy on taking this whole thing step by step...

"I can relieve all your pain now. Why wait?"

"Come on... it won't hurt... I promise"

"What is 'it'?" I glare at the boy. A smirk crossed his face.

"Guess say yes and then you will see."

This is against my better judgment. But what the hell? I mean, dating Duncan was against my better judgment and I still did it..I mean what is the worst the could happen? If he gives me pills or something, I will just throw it away after all.

"Fine. Yes. Okay take away the pain.. please"

I mentally scold myself for something more needed then I wanted to. But then again I am. I am in desperate need for the 'cure' this strange boy has. The cure that will heal my heart...and free me from this pain and misery.

His smirk turned into a smile.

"Thank you. Now close your eyes...this will only take a second"

I did as told. Slowly hiding my deep brown orbs from the world. Then everything went silent until I hear him whisper, "Don't move. Don't open your eyes."

"Okay" I respond standing still as a statue deep in the park with my eyes closed and a strange boy slowly creeping up from behind.

PINCH

I felt something bite me on my neck soon followed by a warm sticky liquid.

Blood maybe?

Then I felt him sucking on my neck eagerly. Like we were mad lovers and he was trying to mark my neck as his. My C.I.T. training kicked in and I kicked him in what I guessed was his crotch.

"You are going to wish you never did that princess'' I felt his smirk on my skin as strong arms held my weak body still.

Weak for crying? Or weak from losing blood? I couldn't tell.

And odd feeling came over me. No it wasn't fear or nervousness. It felt like all the blood and all the warmth was leaving my body.

But how is that possible?

I felt limp and if it hadn't been for the fact this guy is holding me off the ground I would of fell on my face for sure.

This feeling was followed by another stranger one. The feeling of something rushing through my veins. No, not like an adrenaline rush or anything. Like how water rushes from a waterfall. It was a quick and overpowering making a scream escape from my lips.

But he didn't stop. Oh no. He didn't stop until the wounds of my neck that were leaking red earlier were spraying out this cold liquid. Then he stopped and pulled away, letting me fall to my knees.

I looked up at him, shocked and cradling my neck.

"You bit me!"

"Yup, you don't have to thank me." he winked.

"What did you do?" I screamed pulling my hand away to see clear cold liquid in my palm. "What is this?"

"I took away your pain" the boy proudly stated.

"How?"

"Simple my dear...by turning you into a vampire."