Disclaimer: I don't own Enterprise, Aladdin, or Robin Williams. You want
to know how these things come together? Just read. This story comes from
my own demented mind from my own little world, so don't mind me.
Three Wishes
The enterprise soars across the screen with the usual heroic music blaring in the background. Cut to Archer and the crew on the bridge.
Archer: Good morning everyone.
Trip: Good morning, oh mighty captain.
Malcolm: (laughter)
Archer: What did he do?
T'Pol: He snuck onto the Kretassan ship that just left and stole all their treasures.
Trip: Son of a bitch.
Archer: Great! Now I have to dress up like a white Bob Marley again and play Lincoln Logs with one of their famous trees. Thank you Trip, now we have to find them in the middle of space!
Trip: Or do we?
Archer: What?
Trip: Everything is in my quarters, I'll be more than happy to share everything with you all if you keep it on the down low.
Malcolm: Trip, you aren't black.
Travis: Yeah, but aren't you supposed to be gay, Malcolm?
Malcolm pulls his phase pistol out of its holster and shoots Travis.
Malcolm: What? It's on stun. At least he will definitely have no more lines this episode.
Archer: True, and we also won't have to share our fortunes with him either.
Trip: Good observation, sir.
Archer: Shut up. Everyone to Trip's quarters. Phlox, take Travis to sickbay and lay him on a table.
(Later, in Trip's quarters)
Archer: Everyone take five items, I get twenty because I'm special.
Everyone dives onto the pile and starts fighting for the prettiest stuff, much like you see in cartoons. Malcolm takes his phase pistol out of its holster and shoots everyone. Then he shoots Trip a couple more times. Don't worry, its still on stun. Malcolm digs through the pile of bodies to find millions of dollars of gold and jewels. Walking away with bags of riches, Malcolm retires to his quarters for a good night's sleep.
Mysterious voice: OOOOoooOOOOoohhHHH.
Malcolm: What the hell?
Mysterious voice: Rub me.
Malcolm: Excuse me!?
Mysterious voice: Rub me.
Malcolm: You aren't what I think you are, right?
Mysterious voice: No, stupid. I'm in the sack.
Malcolm: What!?
Mysterious voice: The sack of jewels.
Malcolm: I'm scared!
Mysterious voice: Not that! The one you stole from Trip!
Malcolm: Oh, okay.
Malcolm Looks through his sack of jewels, (I'm sorry, I really am) and finds an old fashoned oil lamp.
Malcolm: Is this you?
Mysterious voice: Yes, now rub me.
Malcolm: Alright.
Malcolm rubs the lamp and a big blue genie voiced by Robin Williams pops out and starts giving a speech.
Robin Williams: Okay! Lets get this speech starting! Three wishes, no world changing wishes, you can't wish two wishes and wish for eleventy billion more wishes, no wishing for burritos, (last time it got ugly), and no wishes that the author of this story will have a hard time describing. You got that?
Malcolm: Yeah, I just don't believe you.
Robin Williams: You don't believe me! This is terrible! Listen kid, just try me. Go ahead, wish away.
Malcolm: Screw that, I don't even care enough, I'm too tired.
Malcolm lays back down in his bed.
Robin Williams: Well then what would you "waste it on"? (making quote gestures with his fingers)
Malcolm: Probably large quantities of guns and photon torpedoes with a solar-system-full of uninhabited planets and moons.
Robin Williams: Really?
Malcolm: Yeah, that's what I would wish.
Robin Williams: You said "I wish!" Your wish is my command!
Blue streaks come out of the genie's fingers and a mountain of weapons appears on Malcolm's bed. The Enterprise becomes covered with photon torpedoes and warps into the nearest uninhabited solar system.
Malcolm: Hell yeah!
Malcolm spends the remainder of the day running around Enterprise killing random crewmen. He also shoots Trip a couple more times. From his lack of sleep, Malcolm returns to his quarters to catch up on some much needed Z's.
Malcolm (wiped): Whew, that was fun.
Suddenly, Archer, T'Pol, Hoshi, a disheveled Trip, and an angry looking Porthos knock down Malcolm's door with phase pistols. They seem pissed.
Malcolm: I wish everyone wasn't angry at me and blames Trip for everything that I did and Hoshi falls madly in love with me right now.
Robin Williams: Alright!
More blue squiggles fly out of the genie's fingers and Archer, T'Pol, and Porthos run after Trip, waving their phase pistols in the air.
Hoshi stays behind, and starts talking about weapons with Malcolm.
Malcolm: Hey genie, that counted as one wish?
Robin Williams: Yeah, you were able to fit it into one sentence, so it counts.
Malcolm: Hell yeah! Oh, Hoshi, do you want to go shoot random crewmen with me?
Hoshi: Sure.
Robin Williams: Score!
Malcolm: Shut up!
Malcolm goes back to his quarters with Hoshi after a long day of shooting people and they cuddle. (Awwww....how sweet!)
The next day, the genie is very agitated. He is twitching in the corner almost as much as Tiger of the Wind when writing Welcome to Insanity with TripGirl05. (I just had to plug it!)
Malcolm: What's wrong genie?
Robin Williams: I'm going through wish withdrawal.
Malcolm: That sucks.
Robin Williams: Make a wish! Quick!
Malcolm: I love everything that happened, including Hoshi, but its not real. My last wish has to be to take back all my wishes and send me back in time before Trip sneaks onto the Kretassan ship.
Robin Williams: That's sweet. Alright, here we go.
Blue silly string flies out of the genie's fingers and before he knows it, Malcolm is transported to the docking bay, right in front of Trip.
Trip: Hey man, how the hell did you get-ooof!
Malcolm tackles Trip, kneeing him in the side a few times, the proceeds to punch him unconscious before random crewmen pry him off.
Malcolm: It's for your own good!
Random Crewman #1: Thanks, moron, now he'll be in sickbay for a week. What'll we do now?
Later that day:
Malcolm: Yeeehaaaa!
KaBoOm!
Malcolm shoots another torpedo into an uninhabited planet.
Malcolm: You want to try one?
Hoshi: I'd love to. Yeeeeehaaaaa!
KaBoOm!
Malcolm: That was a good "yeeha"! (looks to the camera) You gotta love her!
(By the way, this is my first story. All feedback is appreciated. Don't hold back!)
Three Wishes
The enterprise soars across the screen with the usual heroic music blaring in the background. Cut to Archer and the crew on the bridge.
Archer: Good morning everyone.
Trip: Good morning, oh mighty captain.
Malcolm: (laughter)
Archer: What did he do?
T'Pol: He snuck onto the Kretassan ship that just left and stole all their treasures.
Trip: Son of a bitch.
Archer: Great! Now I have to dress up like a white Bob Marley again and play Lincoln Logs with one of their famous trees. Thank you Trip, now we have to find them in the middle of space!
Trip: Or do we?
Archer: What?
Trip: Everything is in my quarters, I'll be more than happy to share everything with you all if you keep it on the down low.
Malcolm: Trip, you aren't black.
Travis: Yeah, but aren't you supposed to be gay, Malcolm?
Malcolm pulls his phase pistol out of its holster and shoots Travis.
Malcolm: What? It's on stun. At least he will definitely have no more lines this episode.
Archer: True, and we also won't have to share our fortunes with him either.
Trip: Good observation, sir.
Archer: Shut up. Everyone to Trip's quarters. Phlox, take Travis to sickbay and lay him on a table.
(Later, in Trip's quarters)
Archer: Everyone take five items, I get twenty because I'm special.
Everyone dives onto the pile and starts fighting for the prettiest stuff, much like you see in cartoons. Malcolm takes his phase pistol out of its holster and shoots everyone. Then he shoots Trip a couple more times. Don't worry, its still on stun. Malcolm digs through the pile of bodies to find millions of dollars of gold and jewels. Walking away with bags of riches, Malcolm retires to his quarters for a good night's sleep.
Mysterious voice: OOOOoooOOOOoohhHHH.
Malcolm: What the hell?
Mysterious voice: Rub me.
Malcolm: Excuse me!?
Mysterious voice: Rub me.
Malcolm: You aren't what I think you are, right?
Mysterious voice: No, stupid. I'm in the sack.
Malcolm: What!?
Mysterious voice: The sack of jewels.
Malcolm: I'm scared!
Mysterious voice: Not that! The one you stole from Trip!
Malcolm: Oh, okay.
Malcolm Looks through his sack of jewels, (I'm sorry, I really am) and finds an old fashoned oil lamp.
Malcolm: Is this you?
Mysterious voice: Yes, now rub me.
Malcolm: Alright.
Malcolm rubs the lamp and a big blue genie voiced by Robin Williams pops out and starts giving a speech.
Robin Williams: Okay! Lets get this speech starting! Three wishes, no world changing wishes, you can't wish two wishes and wish for eleventy billion more wishes, no wishing for burritos, (last time it got ugly), and no wishes that the author of this story will have a hard time describing. You got that?
Malcolm: Yeah, I just don't believe you.
Robin Williams: You don't believe me! This is terrible! Listen kid, just try me. Go ahead, wish away.
Malcolm: Screw that, I don't even care enough, I'm too tired.
Malcolm lays back down in his bed.
Robin Williams: Well then what would you "waste it on"? (making quote gestures with his fingers)
Malcolm: Probably large quantities of guns and photon torpedoes with a solar-system-full of uninhabited planets and moons.
Robin Williams: Really?
Malcolm: Yeah, that's what I would wish.
Robin Williams: You said "I wish!" Your wish is my command!
Blue streaks come out of the genie's fingers and a mountain of weapons appears on Malcolm's bed. The Enterprise becomes covered with photon torpedoes and warps into the nearest uninhabited solar system.
Malcolm: Hell yeah!
Malcolm spends the remainder of the day running around Enterprise killing random crewmen. He also shoots Trip a couple more times. From his lack of sleep, Malcolm returns to his quarters to catch up on some much needed Z's.
Malcolm (wiped): Whew, that was fun.
Suddenly, Archer, T'Pol, Hoshi, a disheveled Trip, and an angry looking Porthos knock down Malcolm's door with phase pistols. They seem pissed.
Malcolm: I wish everyone wasn't angry at me and blames Trip for everything that I did and Hoshi falls madly in love with me right now.
Robin Williams: Alright!
More blue squiggles fly out of the genie's fingers and Archer, T'Pol, and Porthos run after Trip, waving their phase pistols in the air.
Hoshi stays behind, and starts talking about weapons with Malcolm.
Malcolm: Hey genie, that counted as one wish?
Robin Williams: Yeah, you were able to fit it into one sentence, so it counts.
Malcolm: Hell yeah! Oh, Hoshi, do you want to go shoot random crewmen with me?
Hoshi: Sure.
Robin Williams: Score!
Malcolm: Shut up!
Malcolm goes back to his quarters with Hoshi after a long day of shooting people and they cuddle. (Awwww....how sweet!)
The next day, the genie is very agitated. He is twitching in the corner almost as much as Tiger of the Wind when writing Welcome to Insanity with TripGirl05. (I just had to plug it!)
Malcolm: What's wrong genie?
Robin Williams: I'm going through wish withdrawal.
Malcolm: That sucks.
Robin Williams: Make a wish! Quick!
Malcolm: I love everything that happened, including Hoshi, but its not real. My last wish has to be to take back all my wishes and send me back in time before Trip sneaks onto the Kretassan ship.
Robin Williams: That's sweet. Alright, here we go.
Blue silly string flies out of the genie's fingers and before he knows it, Malcolm is transported to the docking bay, right in front of Trip.
Trip: Hey man, how the hell did you get-ooof!
Malcolm tackles Trip, kneeing him in the side a few times, the proceeds to punch him unconscious before random crewmen pry him off.
Malcolm: It's for your own good!
Random Crewman #1: Thanks, moron, now he'll be in sickbay for a week. What'll we do now?
Later that day:
Malcolm: Yeeehaaaa!
KaBoOm!
Malcolm shoots another torpedo into an uninhabited planet.
Malcolm: You want to try one?
Hoshi: I'd love to. Yeeeeehaaaaa!
KaBoOm!
Malcolm: That was a good "yeeha"! (looks to the camera) You gotta love her!
(By the way, this is my first story. All feedback is appreciated. Don't hold back!)
