AN: Hellos Peoples! Did you know that I am alive? Really! I am! And I'm not an evil zombie that has taken over Kat's body to control the minds of the readers who get sucked into reading my work. Really. I'm not. This may come as a shock to the people who have me on Author Alert, because I last updated in May. And I have no excuses for you.

So to wrap up this author's note, here is your random piece of poetry for the day...

A bottle of perfume that Willy sent
Was highly displeasing to Millicent.
Her thanks were so cold
That they quarreled, I'm told,
Through that silly scent Willy sent Millicent.

The end! (I own neither that, or PJO or Disney... if I did... let's just say that the movie version of I'd Tell You I Love You but then I'd have to Kill You would be out, and also, I would have bought the rights to Anastasia.) On with the story!

Percy Jackson and the Disturbing Under the Sea Incident

The day at Camp Half Blood started off perfectly normal. The sun was shining. The Apollo campers were playing basketball (read as showing off). The Aphrodite kids were putting on makeup (read as gossiping). Dionysus was losing at pinochle. And Annabeth Chase was sitting under an oak tree just above the shoreline of the beach, reading a lengthy book.

Annabeth snapped the tome shut, setting it on the ground next to her. She glanced at her watch. Four hours! How could anyone go swimming for four hours?

Annabeth stared out into the ocean. Still no sign of Percy. She groaned.

She picked her book up, opening to her place. A technique commonly employed in houses featuring the Greek Style ... The book was closed once more. As fascinating as it was, after four hours and five hundred pages of reading about columns, even she was a little architectured out. Annabeth placed it back on the grass beside her. The girl leaned back against the oak, head tilted up, eyes closed.

Where was he?

Her ADHD would not let her sit still. Annabeth fidgeted, about to reach for the book once more, when she heard a sound coming from the direction of the ocean.

Her eyes flew open just in time to see a figure collapse just past the water line.

Annabeth leapt up, sprinting down to the prone figure. She knelt, cradling his head. Percy just lay there, his black hair sopping wet. With most people, that would be normal after a four hour swim, but Percy only got wet when he was exhausted, or something had happened. Something bad.

"No," she murmured, "no, no, no. Wake up, Seaweed Brain. Please wake up."

At the sound of her voice, Percy stirred a little. She shook him in attempt to wake him further. "Annabeth?" he mumbled.

"Yes?" she breathed.

He opened his eyes blearily. "It's real. All of it."

A little panicked, she asked, "What's real?"

Percy gave a weak, slightly hysterical laugh, then hummed something under his breath.

His head hit the sand once more.

Annabeth turned toward camp. "Medic! I we need a medic over here!"

LineBreak~LineBreak~LineBreak~BineLake~BrineSake~RindWake~MineSnape~SignAche

(My line breaks are awesome)

There were four people in the infirmary. Argus sat in his usual position by the door, guarding the place from attack. Chiron and Annabeth looked down at Percy as he lay in bed. Annabeth looked at her boyfriend worriedly, than glanced up at her mentor. "What is wrong with him?"

Chiron frowned. "I don't quite know. Physically, he's fine. Mentally, I'm not so sure."

Annabeth paled. "What do you mean?"

"He seems to be displaying the symptoms of physiological trauma. But that doesn't make sense. What on earth could traumatize Percy Jackson? He's a veteran of two major wars! If he wasn't traumatized by them, what could possibly have shocked him so badly?"

She stared back down at Percy, shaking her head slowly. "I don't know."

The two stayed standing beside the bed for a moment longer, before Chiron walked away.

"Alert me at the slightest change," he murmured to Argus as he passed him.

Argus nodded, as silent as ever, and the door to the infirmary closed.

SignAche~WhineChake~WeanChalk~BeanWalk~SeanPock~RonRock~DobbySock~HappyDoc

Six hours later:

Percy bolted upright in the bed. Annabeth, who had been keeping silent vigil next to him since Chiron had left, jumped.

He looked around, spotted her, and relaxed. "Gods, Annabeth, I'm going to have nightmares for weeks. It was never ending!"

Annabeth looked at him, concerned. "Percy, what happened? You came up on the beach, and then you just, you just collapsed! And you were muttering to your self ... What happened?"

"It started out very normal. I got into the water, swam out into the ocean, visited with some of the underwater creatures around the area, and then ... then things got weird."

"Weird? Weird how?"

"Scary weird."

"Tell me."

"There were these fish, and - you know that fish don't normally bother me - but these ... these fish were disturbing."

"What?"

"They were smiling. They were all ... all ... Annabeth, what's another word for really, really, really, really?"

"Extremely? Intensely? Ridiculously? Ludicrously?"

"They were all ludicrously happy. They were surrounding this girl, and they were basically taunting her. Through song. I can still hear their shrill little voices: "The sea weed is always greener, in somebody else's lake. You dream about going up there, girl that is a big mistake." Percy broke off, looking mildly nauseous.

Annabeth blinked.

He continued. "And the thing was, most of their lyrics were factually incorrect! Sea weed normally has the same coloration, no matter what lake it is in! Also, these fish were unnatural! How is it even possible for a carp to play a harp?"

Annabeth recovered from her momentary shock. "Percy, were the singing fish conducted by a crab?"

Nod.

"Did the girl have red hair?"

Nod.

"Was she who I think she is?"

"Probably."

"Oh, my gods. Did you go after the semi-cephalopod?"

Percy looked confused. "Semi-cephalopod?"

"There isn't really a name for the species. Not that I know of anyway. Did you go after Ursula?"

Percy grinned sheepishly. "Maybe."

"And you weren't hallucinating?"

Indignant shake of head.

"How do you know?"

"Do you think I would actually know the lyrics to Under the Sea other wise?"

"Yes."

"Annabeth! I wouldn't! Really!" He huffed, looking a bit put out.

Annabeth gave a shaky laugh, rolled her eyes and turned to Chiron, who had burst into the room just as Percy had crossed his arms.

"Percy wasn't traumatized," she stated bluntly. "He was just tired. That's why he was out for six hours."

"I was out for six hours?" Percy spluttered indignantly.

Annabeth and Chiron ignored him. "You're sure?" Chiron asked.

"Yep," she replied, popping the P.

"But ... what happened? Why was he unconscious for so long? Why was he acting so strangely before?"

Percy spoke for himself. "Well, what do you expect? I stopped an entire attempt on Triton's life in less than a day! A plot that has been years in the making! That can be really exhausting."

Chiron blinked. "You did what? Why? How?"

"Stopped an attempt on Triton's life. He's my father's lieutenant. It was surprisingly easy. Ursula was practically boring compared to Kronos or Gaea. She never even saw me coming. There were no mind games, no major threats, no calling me by my full name. I don't think she even knew who I was. For some reason, she kept calling me Bill. It was kind of a nice change."

"But then why were you muttering 'It's all real'? And laughing hysterically?"

"I do weird things when I'm tired, okay? Besides, The Little Mermaid is all real. That was – and is - disturbing to me."

Chiron, not knowing what that was, merely stared.

"Anyway," Percy continued, "as I am clearly fine, can I go?"

Chiron nodded, still looking perplexed. Percy stood up, grabbed Annabeth's hand, and the two of them walked out of the infirmary.

"Percy, why didn't you come and get me? I'm due for a quest."

"You would have punched Ariel in the face."

"Yes, I would have. She is very wishy-washy."

Chiron watched the two teenagers leave, utterly bamboozled. "Argus!" he called, "Can you do some research for me on this 'Little Mermaid' myth?"

So love it? Hate it? Printed it out so that you could draw hearts in the margins? Printed it out, just so you can rip it into little pieces? As a person who is not and evil, mind controlling zombie, REVIEW. (If I was an evil mind controlling zombie, you would still review, right?)

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Thanks to everyone who reviewed the previous one-shot in my one-shot series: Artemis and Apollo's Immortal Teenage Minions. (LunaRock, Jamsine, sunsetwarriors (Hi!), Ten-Faced, TheWorldBookGirl (Hi!), EvilPlotBunnyRulesMyMind, QuietReaderWriter, LoganIsAGod, Katie Gardner, MagicSilver7081, Demigod9028. You guys are the best. Oh, and if you are reading this... Hi Miranda!)