Broken Bonds
Disclaimer: All Final Fantasy names, characters and locations belong to Square Enix. I own nothing that you recognize.
Before we begin, I would like to thank Valkyrie Celes and DuckofIndeed for inspiring me to write this story.
This story began as a oneshot that was inspired by a review from Valkyrie Celes. I then started writing Terra and Kefka drabbles, and somewhere along the line I realized that I could build an entire story around this oneshot I was writing, and the inspiration for that story came from Things Forgotten, which was written by DuckofIndeed and is, in my opinion, the best Kefka and Terra story ever written. I highly recommend it, as well as Duck's other stories. They are definitely worth reading.
So thank you, Valkyrie and Duck. Without you this story wouldn't exist.
Chapter 1 - Memories & Dreams
She could still remember the first time they met, his blond hair plastered to the sides of his face as he took her by the hand, running with her through the rain as they tried to escape the deluge that poured from the darkened skies above.
Dr. Cid had just been given the go ahead to begin his research, and with it came a move to a new area of the palace, along with some new equipment that would aid in his research. He needed someone to watch over her during the move, and so this young man was given the job of looking after her.
Kefka had known Cid since he was a teenager, and had watched Terra from afar ever since they brought her from the Esper World three years ago. He'd watched her grow from a toddling infant into a beautiful little girl, and when Cid came to him asking that he watch her during the move, Kefka was happy to lend a hand and look after her for a while.
Thunder exploded overhead, shaking the ground and stopping them dead in their tracks. Terra screamed, unable to move another step as she was overcome with fright. Kefka scooped her up in his arms, his head down and his blond hair trailing out behind him as he ran with her the rest of the way. He glanced over his shoulder when he heard her cry, and saw that she had dropped her plush moogle when he picked her up. He told her he would come back for it later. Right now they had to get inside before they both got soaked and ended up getting sick from the cold and rain.
Kefka made it down the stairs and into the lower halls of the palace in record time, the little girl crying as she buried her face in his chest. He cursed his luck as he rubbed and patted her back, trying his best to comfort the crying five year old. He hadn't expected the storm to arrive so soon. None of them did. Which meant that most of Cid's new equipment was going to get wet.
"It's alright, dear," he soothed, walking over to the window and looking out into the pouring rain. There was Cid, along with several of his assistants from the lab and a handful of Imperial soldiers, moving the equipment across the grounds and up a flight of stairs as quickly as they could. Some of the machines and other equipment was quite large. Kefka had never seen anything like it before as they carried the boxes into the palace. Other things, such as the heavier machines, tables, and an assortment of things Kefka had no name for, was too big to be put in boxes. Luckily a few of the soldiers had brought some tarps in case it rained, and were hastily covering the equipment before it could get damaged by the water.
Kefka sighed and sat down in a chair by the window. The little girl was still crying, her loud wails reduced to hiccuping sobs as he continued talking to her and rubbing her back.
"Shh, hush now," he said. "You're going to give me a headache."
Terra sniffled and whimpered as she gazed over his shoulder out the window. The noise from the storm was scaring her, and she didn't have her plush moogle to comfort her and make her feel better. What she did have was this young man, whose hair was dripping rain water into his face. He'd done his best to shield her from the rain, and had gotten soaked in the process.
He sat her down in his lap, and asked if she would feel better if she had her plush moogle. Terra nodded, and he reached into his pocket, taking out a hairtie and tying his hair back in a ponytail.
"I'll get it for you," he said. "It's going to be wet after being left out in the rain. But it'll only take a few minutes to dry."
Kefka wiped the tears from her cheeks, then deposited her on the chair. "Stay here. I'll be right back." He smiled at her, giving her a gentle pat on the head, then opened the door and went back out into the rain.
She would never forget looking out the window as Kefka went to retrieve her toy. He was a different person then, only twenty-two years old and so full of life, his bright blue eyes shining when he smiled at her. But all that was about to change once the experiments began.
.oOo.
He continued to care for her, helping her settle into her new living quarters after the move was complete. Cid was too busy looking things over in his lab, making sure that everything was in its place and working properly. Kefka put her to bed, tucking her in and giving her her stuffed moogle. She thanked him, clutching the moogle to her chest as her tired eyes began to close.
"You're a good little girl," said Kefka, ruffling her soft curls. He brushed her hair out of her face, watching as she began to drift off to sleep.
"What are those machines for?" Terra asked sleepily.
Kefka looked towards the door, and saw the light from Cid's lab shining in the hallway. He honestly didn't know what most of the equipment was, but he knew how it was going to be used on her. He couldn't imagine subjecting anyone to that, let alone a little girl who wouldn't understand why this was happening to her.
"Don't worry about them," he said. "Those are for Dr. Cid's research. He's doing work on something very important."
"Like what?"
"Grown up things. Things that tired little girls shouldn't be thinking about."
He rose from the foot of the bed and was halfway across the room when he heard her call his name. Kefka turned around, and saw her wide eyes staring at him in the dark.
"Don't go," she whimpered. "I don't want you to leave."
"It's alright, Terra. I'll be in Dr. Cid's lab if you need me. You're safe here. Nothing is going to happen to you."
Why did he feel like he was lying to her when he said that? They could keep her safe from the sort of things little girls feared, like imaginary monsters and things that went bump in the night. But they couldn't protect her forever, not from the things that awaited her in the lab.
He felt terrible, lying to a little girl when he knew what would happen to her. But there was nothing he could do. The Emperor had made his decision. They'd start by telling her that she was special, that they only did this to protect her, and to help keep her and the people around her safe. But who was going to protect her from them?
He would, if he could. He would protect her, like he had done when he carried her inside from the rain. He would take her away from the life that no child should have to suffer through. But Kefka knew it was impossible. The Empire was going to have its way with her, and nothing he said or did would change that. There was nothing left to do but help her through this, one step at a time.
.oOo.
Kefka retreated to the lab after Terra fell asleep, his tired eyes falling on the various machines and equipment as he entered the room. There were things with flashing lights, wires and tubes, buttons and dials. The bright overhead lights glinted off the gleaming metal instruments set out on a tray, and he cringed as he backed away, accidentally bumping into Cid who was standing behind him, going over a stack of papers on his clipboard.
The doctor started, and spun around to see Kefka standing there. "Kefka, good to see you. How is Terra?"
Kefka hesitated for a fraction of a second before answering. "She's asleep."
"Good." Cid went back to scribbling on his clipboard. "I'll have everything ready in a couple of days. Until then she should be kept in isolation. That last incident was enough to convince the Emperor that she's no ordinary girl, Kefka. And I don't think he wants a repeat of what happened."
Kefka wandered over to a section of the lab that had been separated from the rest of the room by a curtain. He pulled back the curtain, revealing a table with leather straps. As horrified as he was by all of this, he couldn't help but feel drawn towards the things in Cid's lab. A curious fascination was slowly growing in the back of his mind, his fingers tracing the buckle on the restraints as he remembered what he'd seen her do.
This little girl had magic, something that hadn't been seen in a thousand years. They realized that she could use magic when her last tantrum resulted in a fire in the nursery room. The carpet was burned and the curtains set on fire when she refused to go to bed at her usual bedtime. There had been other incidents, but they were too small to draw much attention, such as the time Cid had gone to pick her up and received a shock not unlike that of static electricity.
She wasn't aware that she was doing anything. She didn't even know what magic was. How could she control something that she didn't understand? They needed to study her, to learn more about what she was and how she was using magic. More importantly they needed to figure out how to keep her abilities under control. Terra was getting older. She was getting stronger too. And they knew it was only a matter of time before she hurt someone, or herself, with her magic.
Kefka turned, watching as the doctor flipped through the pages on his clipboard. "What happens if these tests are successful and you gain access to her magic?"
Cid looked up from his papers. "We don't know yet, Kefka. The Emperor suggested something along the lines of testing on humans to see if they can be infused with magic."
Kefka was silent, his gaze drifting towards one of the larger machines in the corner. "I want to help," he said slowly. "I can look after her, and help keep her calm during the tests. You're going to have your hands full, trying to care for her while conducting research and keeping everything in order. I can help take care of her while you're busy."
"Are you sure about that?" asked Cid. "It's a big responsibility, looking after a child."
"I'm sure." Kefka nodded, his eyes never leaving the blinking, multicolored lights that lined the side of the machine. "What Terra needs is someone she can trust. Not another lab technician telling her to be quiet so you can concentrate on your work."
Kefka wanted to help the little girl, but he was also interested in Cid's research. Staying in the lab and working with Cid was the perfect way for him to remain by Terra's side. It also meant that he could observe the procedures in the lab, and that he would be the first to know whether or not they were a success.
These were the moments that Terra and Kefka would never forget, not even when his memories faded and turned to dust after years of countless experiments. He would remember the flashing lights when he was sitting alone in his padded cell, their colors just as vivid as they had been many years ago when all of this began. He would paint himself with a variety of colors, from the color of his skin to the fabric of his clothes, until he became someone that Terra no longer recognized. And she would remember too, in brief flashes and in dreams that haunted her at night, her memories flashing before her eyes as he slipped the bejeweled crown on her head. She would remember who he was, if only in her dreams. The person he was would live on in her heart, in laughter and in tears, in silent echoes that lingered in the back of her mind, like ripples on water spreading out across the vast expanse of time.
There were some things they would never forget, not even when their bonds were broken, and all they had lie shattered on the floor, surrounded by a sea of flames.
.oOo.
That night as she slept, Terra dreamt of another world, a world far away from her home in Vector. She'd been having the same dream for as far back as she could remember. It felt as though the world she remembered was her real home, a place she'd long forgotten but could still see clearly in her dreams. Sometimes the images varied, from rolling hills and a small house in the mountains to scenes of traveling long distances over a vast, unknown landscape. But it always ended the same, with her being taken away from this place.
There was a house atop a mountain in the hills. She didn't know the people here, but they felt strangely familiar to her. A man, whose sea green hair was tied back in a ponytail, greeted a young woman as she walked into the kitchen. Terra saw his face as he leaned down to examine the small, cloth bound bundle in the woman's arms. She didn't remember what he said to her, but she could recall the feeling of love and warmth that radiated out from his smiling face.
It was something she sensed in him, a gentle warmth present in his heart the likes of which she had never felt before. No one in Vector had a smile like that, or eyes that shone like the sun when he looked at her. There was something about him, something she couldn't quite explain. But that didn't matter. What mattered was that she felt at peace here. She felt loved, protected and safe, which was something she rarely felt in Vector.
Her dream ended almost as soon as it began, with a woman lying on the ground, injured and bleeding. Streaks of blood covered her face and hands, pouring from a gash in her forehead and trickling down her neck into her hair. Her hand trembled as she reached towards something, and a man, with graying hair and dark eyes, laughed. He was clutching something against his chest, holding it like it was the most precious treasure on earth.
A cold wind was blowing, the skies were dark, and the sound of his wicked laughter filled the air. She didn't know what this place was. All she knew was that she couldn't go back, and it filled her heart with sorrow, knowing that she would never return to this world.
These dreams often caused her to wake up crying in the middle of the night, as was the case when Kefka entered her room at two in the morning. When he asked her what was wrong, all she could say was that she wanted to go home. She kept repeating this over and over, beating her tiny fists against his chest, kicking and screaming as he tried picking her up.
"No!" she wailed, as he wrapped his arms around her, holding her and rocking her until she started to calm down. He had no idea the child could be so difficult, and made a mental note to ask Cid if she was always like this.
Nights like this would come again, when she awoke from her dreams of a lost world, when Cid forced her to lie still and be quiet as he inserted needles under her skin. When she felt frightened and alone, when she hurt from the tests performed on her during the day, Kefka was the one who was there for her. In time she would come to trust him, confiding in him when she was hurt or sad, and Kefka would hold her, the warmth of his body and the sound of his voice reminding her of the home she lost long ago.
.oOo.
The sun was rising over the distant hills, bathing the streets of Vector in warm shades of amber light. Thin clouds skirted across the horizon, catching the colors of the sun and turning from gold to dusky rose. The cold December skies were lit with the growing light of a new day, the storm had departed, and warmth and sunlight was returning to the world.
Dr. Cid hadn't slept much the night before. He went to bed a little after three in the morning when he had finished going over everything in his lab, organizing his paperwork and making sure everything was in order. There was too much going through his mind, too many things that needed to be done now that he'd been given permission to begin testing on the girl. This could lead to one of the greatest scientific breakthroughs in his time, furthering the empire with the development of specialized weapons powered by magic, and knights trained to wield the elements in battle. He didn't know if such things were possible, but the thought alone was enough to keep him up at night, scribbling ideas in his notebooks and reworking his mathematical figures and calculations.
If such power could be harnessed and put to use, it would mean great things for the empire. They would become the most powerful nation in existence, conquering foreign countries in the name of the empire, assuring Gestahl's reign was spread far and wide across the land. It would mean the rebirth of a power not seen in a thousand years, a sleeping energy that had for centuries lay dormant in the darkest corners of the earth, hidden away since the War of the Magi ended. History would be made, right there in Vector, and the world would never be the same again.
Cid continued on his way, until he reached the end of the hall and entered Terra's bedroom. He peered into the darkened room and saw Kefka sitting on the floor beside her bed, sound asleep with his head down and his chin resting against his chest.
At first he doubted the young man's capability to look after her, thinking that it would be too much work and responsibility for someone as young and inexperienced as Kefka Palazzo. He didn't have a great deal of experience raising children, and he didn't know if Kefka was suitable to watch over an unruly five year old. But seeing Kefka like this, asleep on the floor with Terra resting peacefully beside him, made him reconsider letting Kefka take care of her.
He walked over to where Kefka was sleeping with his back against the wall, his trailing cloak draped across his lap like a blanket to keep him warm during the cold winter night. He placed a hand on his shoulder, giving him a gentle shake to rouse him from his slumber.
Kefka snorted and opened his eyes, blinking as his vision adjusted to the dim light of the room. He looked around and noticed a silver of sunlight spilling onto the floor from between the gap in the curtains. Was it morning already? The child had kept him up half the night, crying and begging him to take her home. He didn't remember falling asleep beside the bed. He remembered sliding off the bed into a sitting position on the floor, thinking that his presence might help the little girl relax if stayed and kept her company for a while. But he didn't recall actually drifting off to sleep here, with her head mere inches from his own, as she slept facing the wrong way in bed so she could be closer to him.
More than anything else, Kefka remembered the way she kept asking to go home. She promised she'd be a good girl, apologizing for things she hadn't done, saying that she was sorry and that if he took her home, she wouldn't be a bad girl again. When Kefka insisted that she hadn't actually done anything, Terra looked up at him, tears streaming down her cheeks and said, "Then why am I here? Why did they take me from my home? Why can't I go back? Why?"
It pained him to see her like this, screaming and sobbing until her eyes were red. He knew what she was and how she came to be a part of his world. Cid knew what she was as well. But the Emperor had forbidden them from telling her the truth. Even if they told her, she was too young to understand. Kefka told her it was just a dream, explaining the difference between dreams and reality. But she shook her head, insisting that what she saw was real.
Kefka's thoughts were interrupted when Cid spoke, telling him good morning and asking if he slept well. Kefka nodded, yawning and rubbing sleep from his eyes. He hadn't actually slept much, thanks to Terra. But what little sleep he got was enough to sustain him until after lunch when he eventually collapsed in bed and fell asleep.
"She didn't give you too much trouble, did she?" asked Cid.
Kefka sighed, looking back at the little girl in the bed beside him. "She kept me up half the night, crying her eyes out and saying that she wanted to go home. I tried holding her, talking to her and telling her it was just a dream, but she kept crying. All I could do was hold her until she cried herself to sleep." He gestured with a wave of his hand towards the sleeping girl. "The Emperor doesn't see this. He doesn't see how miserable she is. And he probably doesn't care. If he did, he wouldn't have taken her from the Esper World in the first place."
Cid knelt down on the floor beside him, and the young man turned to meet his gaze. "You did good last night, Kefka," he said, patting him on the shoulder. "I've given some thought to you helping me with Terra. And after what I've seen this morning, I've decided to let you look after her."
Kefka smiled, thanking him for the opportunity to take care of her. He knew there wasn't much he or anyone else could do for her. And while it was true that Kefka didn't have a great deal of experience taking care of children, he would simply do what anyone else would when placed in that position - his very best.
If it helped ease her suffering, if it helped her sleep better at night and comforted her knowing that someone was there for her, then he would do the best he could. He couldn't free her from this life of experimental testing and imprisonment within these walls. He couldn't give her the life she should have had, the life that she deserved. But the one thing that he could give her was a friend.
