Disclaimer- me no own Naruto © , k?
I no there r a few quote capitalizing problem. I no. I'm lazy. Get over it, k? sorry, but it's too TROUBLESOME. (that's right. Shikamaru and I…. We're buddies. HA)
Thinking
"talking"
Inner
"SHOUTING"
I don't know why, but I'm completely obsessed with putting sakura in a situation where she's in power. Odd, but true O.O
-:-:-:-
My love life is pretty much like this: me and Him in a dark room. We are facing one another, starting out like any other time, or any other person for that matter.
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So… we are five.
I barely knew Him, talking to Him once in awhile, giving each other a wave when we saw one another, but I had a crush on him.
BUT HELL, IT WAS SMALL.
When I lost my self-esteem, I lost interest in Him. To tell you the truth… I forgot about silent little Him, due to the fact that (FUCKING FAT ASS BITCH) ami was constantly THERE.
But I always had Him in my mind… somewhere.
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I smile in that dark room, as he looks at me with soft eyes.
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We are seven.
(No, Team Seven isn't there yet)
Just the age of seven. My self-esteem is back, so is my love life, Him. There was something different in His movements, His attitude. But I still liked Him.
Ino was there, being her best friend/rival self, but I severed those ties… like He did. I started my fan girl ways then. Makes me sick thinking about it.
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I giggle like a mad woman, both arms stretched out, awaiting Him. He ignores me, and turns to walk away. I follow Him in that dark room, screaming His name like a banshee.
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We are 12.
I look at Him with a smile, then I toss my long pink hair. He ignores me again, with a cold, 'Go away, Sakura.'
I boast to the girls that He knows my name, or even said more than a single word to me.
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I am on his team.
Team Seven, to be exact, with Naruto.
When I thought He really wanted to kiss me, I felt… relieved. Relieved that he actually wanted me in his life. But when I found out it was Naruto, my hopes shattered.
It hurt… but I made myself move on.
At first, the missions are easy. But then, we met Tazuna the Bridge Builder and Zabuza along with his 'tool', Haku.
When I sat back and did nothing, He went in charging. When I thought He died, I cried.
I never knew how painful it was, or how strong the longing was for that person to come back. Guess that goes to show you: you don't know what you have until it's gone. Or semi gone.
But it also made me curious. Who was His brother? Why does he want to kill him? But most of all…
Why didn't he say anything?
Death is the way of the shinobi.
We are merely tools.
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One of my arms is taken back, along with my intense screaming. I still chase Him in that black room, but it's more for Him to open up. I start to whisper words just to show I cared.
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We were in the Chuunin Exams.
Once again, I feel useless, unneeded, and a burden.
He wanted to defeat His brother for revenge. His clan meant that much.
He got the Curse mark there, when I could have stopped it. He shed blood just to save me. When I saw Him faint in my arms, it felt like my first so-called 'death'.
That pain, that loneliness…
I started to think…
Was this really how he felt every day?
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I stop chasing, but the arm doesn't move. He stops too, still not facing me. I whisper the words of worry and concern.
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I cut my precious hair just to save my team and Lee.
I was actually… proud of myself. Or somewhat proud.
I felt a jolt of happiness when I felt Him wake up, but the Chakra was too intense.
And for the first time… I was scared of Him.
When I thought He was really going to kill that Sound ninja, Zaku, I panicked. I didn't want him to be a murderer for me! TO KILL!
It gave me that burst of courage to actually hug Him. To stop the monster I couldn't prevent from coming into being.
It gave me the courage to actually feel what truly caring for a person felt like.
To love.
But back then, I wasn't sure what the feeling was.
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The words become louder, my arms both stretched out, telling Him it was okay to tell me. He looks at me, eyes beginning to show the trust I was looking for.
In that big, black room.
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When He went up against Gaara of the Sand, I was mentally screaming at Him.
He was HURT!
But I had no choice, but to watch Him from the stands, as Orochimaru unleashed his plan.
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I watch Him fight in His mind what to do.
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As He and Gaara fought, I stood there.
Watching as He got thrown around like a rag doll. Even with Kakashi sensei's personal training and the Curse Seal, it wasn't enough to defeat Gaara.
I watched as he aimed his claws of pure sand at Him.
But then I watched myself get whammed into a tree, unconscious.
The only thing going through my mind was:
Where was I getting all this courage from?!
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He faces me and takes a nervous step forward. I never backed down as I kept my arms wide open in that dark room.
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When He didn't wake up from the coma, I felt it again. That pain, that loneliness. I was able to recognize another emotion: fright. I was scared I had lost Him.
It went away when He woke up.
But when He and Naruto went to the roof… it came back. Especially when He went missing.
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He whispered the words that sent me on a whirl.
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We spent time together.
It was fun.
Naruto showed Him what a friend could be.
Kakashi showed Him what an idol was really like.
And I guess… I showed Him a mother's care and devotion.
What love was supposed to be.
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He began to smile, or what I thought was.
In that pitch black room.
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We are 13.
It wasn't meant to last.
That one warm Summer night, He left… just like how I thought He left all those other times in my dreams and in reality
They didn't come out at first… the tears. But as I got deeper and deeper into our relationship, I realized how out of the blue I was.
I knew nothing about Him… that actually meant something of significance.
I knew a lot… favorite food, favorite color, where He lived, why He lived… His most cherished memories…
But I was in way over my head, unlike most fan girls. I was in TOO deep.
It came to me as I cried out my heart:
I wanted to please Him.
I wanted to make Him happy.
I wanted to see Him everyday.
I wanted to have a life with Him.
It wasn't just an obsession anymore, it wasn't just me in a group of girls screaming his name... I stood out, because what I showed Him was more than true.
Even when he didn't turn around, I still screamed…
"I love you with all my heart!"
But from that point… I figured out I didn't only have a crush on Him… but I was also in love with Him.
I had already fallen into a inescapable love for Him.
The only reason why I cried His name the very next morning… was that I only found out these feelings that one warm Summer night.
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The smile faded like smoke, before He turned away sharply, and ran away. I scream His name, chasing.
He doesn't look back, before I collapse from exhaustion.
By the time I open my eyes again… He's gone.
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I couldn't believe Naruto made such a large promise for me.
Especially when four other boys were there too. I cried then too, hoping Naruto was stupid enough that he wouldn't know I was crying for Him, not because of Him.
Too bad that he did know and more.
When he came back, I wasn't disappointed…
I was devastated beyond words. Not that Naruto couldn't bring him back… But that Naruto thought I was too weak to handle the truth:
He did this to Naruto… and he didn't care about me at all.
I felt the same way when Naruto left to train with Jiraiya…
But I also felt like I was being left behind because I was weaker than my boys.
My own team mates.
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I sit on my knees, and cry. I scream out my pain, then I look to where He went.
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We are 14.
A year passes.
I was different, due to Tsunade's teaching: more powerful, more dependable, more… I guess what some would say, beautiful.
But I was also more lonely. More closed off. I still cried, even though I hated it with a passion, I still couldn't cover up the look of pain in my eyes when His name was mentioned.
Better yet, I couldn't cover up any emotion in my eyes at all. I hated how so many people could read me like a book!
But out of all the thing I despised… I hated how I just couldn't smile like I used to.
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I get up and start walking again. I ignore the voices echoing from the room and keep walking. I couldn't see Him and I silently cried without a sound, nor a tear.
I scream without making a single whimper.
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We are 15.
Naruto came back from whatever shenanigans he was off on and I showed Him what working inside Konohagakure (a/n I think) could turn into:
A little girl, growing into a fine young woman.
Sure, he was surprised at the many changes, in Konoha and in me, but I just couldn't figure out what He might do once we brought Him back.
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I get up from me hunched position, I put on a smile, real or not, and I stop crying. The voices cease, as I walked towards Him.
Even though I was in the dark room…
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I saw Him first time in two years.
Crud, He was hot. He was hotter than fire. He was hotter than the fire in my eyes. He was hotter than the desert. He was hotter than lava. He was hotter than magma. He was hotter than the fire on the sun. He was hotter than the sun. He was hotter than the sun set on fire. He was hotter the sun drenched in oil, then set on fire. He was hotter than FUCKING HOT!
HELL, HE WAS HOTTER THAN LEE ON A 109 DEGREE DAY, TRAINING!
…
Okay, I got carried away.
When He merely mentioned my name, no matter how low it was… I could hear it for miles.
When I looked into His eyes, I could see nothing. He was just a blank canvas then.
But there was something I could read: anger. Anger meaning anger in it's purest and softest form.
Of course my thoughts were completed when He stabbed Naruto…
Then me.
Of course, it had always been , 'then me'.
I made a promise to myself, as I tried to attack.
EITHER I BRING YOU BACK, OR I'LL DIE TRYING!
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He is once again in my view. Very small, but there. I start to run after Him, through He seemed several miles away.
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We are 18.
And we've finally been able to bring Him back…
After killing that bitch, Karin…
(HELL YEAH! THAT FUCKING WHORE WENT DOWN LIKE A TON OF BRICKS!)
Jugo, and Suigetsu, it wasn't very hard.
Mostly because we found Him looming over Itachi's dead body, his eyes torn out with His bare hands.
He was mental for awhile, until Kakashi sensei ordered me to tranquilize Him, which I took pleasure in doing.
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I had finally caught up to Him, ending up in that same position:
His back to me, with me facing that back.
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He never said much to me, except for a polite 'thank you,' or 'good morning Haruno san'. I did the same, just without the san, and I replaced my name with Uchiha. He never seemed like He hated this name, but He did seem uncomfortable with it.
And to my discomfort, I was assigned to guard Him. 24/7, meaning we had to sleep in the… same…ROOM…
IN THE SAME BED…
And you know what? It was like sleeping with a statue.
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I walk a little closer.
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We are 19.
He starts to open up, little by little, mostly at Kakashi sensei.
I know why: both had a past they rather not say. But seriously, He opened up to Naruto before me OF ALL PEOPLE.
At first, I didn't understand. I lived with Him for a year, I dealt with every single thing… yet, not a single word. It hurt too. So… I started to ignore Him during His final months of probation. (Which was only a year. Thank goodness for ME being Tsunade's apprentice! No appreciation there, either.)
But of course, I thought He didn't even care. He came home after a day of training, grabbed a tomato, went into our room, and that was the end of our living together. The end of the probation.
The next day, I assumed He would be out of my apartment, but noo.
There He was… still in MY bed, in MY apartment, in MY life.
Still thinking He didn't care, I got up, and went to work, thinking He would be gone by the time I got back.
But I was wrong. He was still there, and waiting. He NEVER waited for me.
So I said,
"What are you doing? Shouldn't you be at the Uchiha compound, or at least your OWN apartment by now?"
I put my hands on my hips, leaning on my left leg.
He simply got up from the kitchen chair, waltzed His way over to me, and said,
"Why are you ignoring me?"
I glared at Him, saying with a hiss,
"You can't counter a question with a question. Now answer my question!"
He had smirked before He immediately frowned.
"Answer my question, and you'll find out."
I had pondered if I should answer before I sighed, giving up.
"I'm mad at you. How does my being mad at you answer anything?"
He started to shake His head, laughing at my stupidity.
"Don't you think I would want your forgiveness?"
I scoffed, scowling.
"You? Forgiveness?! You're obsessed with pride. Remember? You don't the pity, of my forgiveness."
I can still remember that He had flinched at my words, no matter how small that flinch was. I also can remember that He gulped, swallowing what pride He had left, before He said the following:
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you anything. I didn't want you to worry."
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He finally faces me, after all these years, eyes closed.
As I got closer, I noticed the height difference: it was the three foot six, seven year old Him, not the six foot three, 19 year old Him.
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We are 21.
He still hadn't picked up anything from my apartment. Nope, they just sat in MY apartment. Yup.
Anyway, getting off track, He was starting to get a little too close for me. Every time I went to bed, no one was there. Every time I wake up, GUESS WHO'S THERE.
Yeah, go ahead. Guess.
…
Correct answer:
Him.
Wrong answer:
Lee, who had just recently dubbed himself forever single (HERMIT!), or Naruto, who just got married to a certain white eyed girl.
Still, whatta ya know when you go for a drink, you find out a guy's real feelings, after he gets drunk? Yeah, classic, isn't it?
By the end of the night, or should I say the beginning of the next day, to my surprise…
He started crying.
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As I walk up to the little boy He runs straight towards me, crying.
In that black room… He whispered the words, "I'm sorry, Sakura."
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We are 23.
We actually start dating.
Half of my childhood dream has come true… except for the point He wasn't romantic whatsoever, or that we weren't saying 'I love you' all the time.
And we weren't married… yet.
Still, He was the human ice cube.
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He spaces Himself from me, before somehow growing back to His 23 year old self. Now we were just like the beginning:
He and I in that dark room… facing one another like we would any person.
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We are 25.
And we were married.
LET'S ALL SCREAM YAY SARCASTICALLY!… because I was pretty sure He didn't love me.
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We walk towards each other for the first time… it had always been me walking… alone.
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We are 26.
And we have kids… no duh there.
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Barely a foot away from me, I look up into His black eyes. He looks down into my green.
(a/n COUGH COUGH -cheesy- COUGH COUGH!)
Obsidian and emerald then clash and mix.
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We are 53.
After the long years of raising five kids, all have moved out. Either married, most wanted single, engaged, or dating.
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Finally, after all these years… He hugs me. Holds me.
He whispers, "Aishiteru, Sakura."
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We are 66.
As we grow older, and watch the grand kids grow… I smile. I still look back at all my memories, though fading with time.
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I look down as I begin to sob. My wrinkles show, but I don't care…
In that black room…
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But the only memory that will stay with this old bag of bones is at the age of 85…
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I look back into His eyes, the black orbs once so thick, strong, and sharp… now soft, gentle, experienced.
As both our times wind down to nothing, I reply in the dark, dark room: "Aishiteru…"
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The one love I've had for a lifetime….
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Uchiha Sasuke.
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a/n MY GOD, THIS TOOK FOREVER! Sorry it's so long even though it really shouldn't be and the bunch of dotty lines :P. Still… good? Bad? NO COMMENT?! STILL, C'MON PEOPLE! WORK WITH ME! I NEED MORE IDEAS! HELP! S.O.S. ALREADLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
