"...So now I've done his bidding, there's nothing more to tell
But I shall always mourn with you the boy we loved so well." - Unknown
In 1917, Toontown, in response to drafting Toons for overseas service, declared independence from the United States. Smartass, a Weasel with an unscrupulous background, overthrew the Tyrant Judge Doom, and crowned Morty Smith Emperor. For 8 years, the Toon Empire lived in peace and prosperity. However, tensions with the Anime Shogunate, the domain of Anime characters, began to rise. An arms race began, with both powers preparing for war. In early 1925, both Powers began a series of Naval maneuvers. This would have disastrous consequences.
Smartass the Weasel was awakened by a pounding on his door. He swore under his breath, and got up. He looked at the clock. It was 2:30 AM. He quickly donned his coat and walked to the door, "What the hell are you waking me up for at this hour?" he demanded of Greasy, who looked pale. Without a word, he handed Smartass a note. Smartass lit a cigar, and began to read. The cigar fell from his mouth, and he stared in shock at Greasy. Smartass called loudly for his aid, and rushed to get his hat.
When his aid, Colonel Foghorn Leghorn arrived, he looked both irritated and worried, "I say, I say, what did you need?"
Smartass began to pace nervously, and waited a moment before speaking. When he spoke, he made a concerted effort to hide the building panic, "Colonel, we may have a war on our hands. Around 2 hours ago, one of our ships, the TTS Defiant, fired on an Anime Shogunate vessel. I don't know why. The fleets were dangerously close, as I warned the Secretary of the Navy. But does Donald Duck, I'm sorry, Grand Admiral Duck listen to me?! Of course not!"
Duck had been taking on an increasingly belligerent stance lately, and was concerning many with his blustering. The naval maneuvers were his idea, and he had convinced the Emperor that not to assert their position would make them look weak. If only he had talked to Morty first, Smartass thought, this whole affair could have been avoided.
He took a deep breath. It was too late to play what-if games. He needed to keep his head clear As Chief of the General Staff, he knew that the fate of Toontown itself may rest on his next decision. If he ordered the military to prepare, it could be perceived as hostility. If he waited too long, Anime forces could be landing on the coast with no one to resist them.
While he was thinking, the telephone rang. He answered. The response was a single word: "Judgement". His heart skipped a beat. This was the code to indicate what he feared most: the Anime Shogunate had began a general mobilization.
Smartass knew what must be done. It was now impossible to wait, and Toontown had to respond. He drafted a note in a hurried scrawl, and handed it to Leghorn, "See that this reaches Emperor Morty, war is upon us," Foghorn looked in utter shock and horror, but left with the note. Smartass then wrote another note, this one ordering Toon mobilization, and signed it. It would require the Emperor's seal and signature to be valid, and he still clung to the hope that it would never leave his office.
Smartass went to his window and looked outside. Toontown looked as cheerful as ever, and he shuddered to think what might become of it if the coming war went poorly. Toons were not known as fighters, but they would willingly lay down their lives to defend their homes. That Smartass knew without a shadow of a doubt.
He looked down at the courtyard of the Capitol Building he lived in, and saw Toon soldiers drilling. They each wore a Field Gray Uniform and Stahlhelm, which had been bought from the new German Republic. Their restricted army saw many spare uniforms, which were sold to Toontown at bargain prices. Their weapons were American; each carried a Springfield Rifle, a holdover of Toontown's past. The soldiers looked splendid, and Smartass found a sense of pride stirring within him. Toontown would win. It had to.
