Hygiene
Dewey's pov
"Eww! You are disgusting, Dewey!" Louie gags.
"How is not washing my hands every single time I do any named activity disgusting? You don't even wash your hands that much." I argue.
"You have to wash your hands after you use the restroom though!" Louie sighs.
"Why? I don't want to wash my hands. The water is too hot and the soap is too cold." I complain.
"You can adjust the temperature of the water! Soap is necessary." Louie rolls his eyes.
"Let's see you roll your eyes at this." I raise my hands and start brushing them off on him, spreading germs or whatever he says it is.
I'm fairly sure that's a myth though.
A myth like deodorant.
"Eww! Stop! You are disgusting!" Louie whines.
"What's going on here?" Huey steps out into the hallway where we are, frowning.
"Dewey is touching me!" Louie complains.
"...and?" Huey tries not to laugh.
"He didn't wash his hands after using the restroom!" Louie points out.
Huey's grin turns to a full frown.
"Eww. No. Go wash your hands. With that thing called soap." Huey nods.
"Not happening. I'm way to busy. You go wash your brain with that thing." I shrug and dance down the hall.
I've actually only been sick from certain issues I know of before, such as food poisoning.
I don't think germs are real.
I've never had a cold, soar throat, or anything with my eyes or ears.
I think my family just wants me to not smell so bad.
Well smelling bad means you are daring and have just been on an adventure.
I personally like my ways and my family shouldn't change that.
"Bleh! What's that smell?!" Beakly groans.
"Oh! It's Dewey!" Webby exclaims running towards me.
"Any given creature shouldn't smell THAT bad!" Beakly scoffs.
"It's cool. You get used to it. It shows he's an adventurer." Webby grins.
Thank you!
"It shows he doesn't keep up any hygiene. Didn't you just clean his room? I bet it's disgusting again." Beakly scoffs.
I look into Webby's eyes and she smiles.
"He wouldn't do that. He's really been trying." Webby throws an arm around me.
I give my signature grin and thumbs up to Beakly.
She scoffs, rolling her eyes and leaves to go make some breakfast.
Louie trips coming down the stairs and everyone immediately runs towards him.
I sigh and walk over.
"Are you hurt? You are crying." Webby states the obvious.
"No. My eyes are tearing up from Dewey's horrible stench!" Louie says , dramatically while putting a hand to his forehead as seen on tv.
Everyone groans and Webby helps him up before skipping back to me.
"Louie is too dramatic. Although, you could shower sometimes." Webby frowns.
"I guess." I agree.
"Then off you go." Webby shoves me up the stairs.
I walk the rest of the way towards my bathroom.
She turns on the water, hands me soap, a towel, and a poof thingy.
"Come see me after you properly use these tools." Webby walks out and shuts the door.
I sigh.
I don't wanna get in.
I just grab a magazine that Louie has marked, 'Don't read! LOUIE'S property!'
I roll my eyes and pick it up.
It has some building blocks and toy cars on the front.
I bet it's just a Christmas gift magazine thing.
I open it and close it immediately after.
I gag and throw the magazine in the trash.
Why was Louie looking at that?!
Also, he's clever putting the Christmas gift cover on that magazine.
I sigh and look down at my hands.
I sorta have paint all over my hands from helping Huey with some painting badge thing.
I don't get why he likes that junk.
I hear a knock and I go to open it.
Webby growls while Louie facepalms.
"You aren't showering! You are sitting there wasting water." Louie huffs.
"Sorry, Lou Lou." I shrug.
"If you practice proper hygiene for a week, I'll do whatever you want, plus give you a surprise." Webby sighs.
"Really?! I'm curious! I'll do it!" I agree.
I close the bathroom door and lock them out.
After I actually shower and wash my hair, I step out and dry off.
I always keep my hygiene up with my hair, but that's it.
Well, I normally brush my teeth once or twice a day because Louie and I sing a song while brushing our teeth that we made up.
So I really just don't keep up the rest of my body, smell, and the neatness of my room.
I brush my teeth and take about forever on my hair before exiting the bathroom in fresh clothes as well.
"Woah. I actually didn't smell you coming, Dewey! Actually, it smells good I'm here!" Louie jumps off his bunk and runs towards me.
"You look and smell nice. I'm impressed!" Louie grins.
"Yeah. Webby said I'd get something out of it." I blush.
"Ooh! Like what?" Louie teases.
I playfully shove him and he laughs.
Louie hooks arms with me and pulls me out of the room.
"We have to show Huey! He's been trying to get you to be hygienic forever too!" Louie exclaims.
"Fine. Where is he?" I ask.
Louie shrugs.
"What? Why are you smiling?" I freak out.
"I want to do things we used to do when we were little! I can actually stand you now and I want to hangout!" Louie jumps up and down.
Louie jumping?
Is he ok?
"Uh...you sure you're ok?" I place my hand on his forehead.
No fever.
"Yeah! More than ok! Wanna go watch 'Duckburg's got Talent' and make fun of people?!" Louie grins.
"I guess." I agree.
"Yay! We can pretend to be the judges, and eat popcorn with an extra half stick of melted butter added, and maybe make a fort to watch the show in, press the buzzers in our apps for the bad people, we could..." Louie keeps listing off things the whole way to the living room.
We finally arrive and Louie pulls me over to the couch and flops down on it.
He giggles and my worry grows.
"Lou Lou, what all have you eaten today?" I question, trying to figure out why he's acting weird.
"Uh...I had some pep. Oh! I also had some of your boo-berry cereal. Sorry." Louie fidgets.
"It's ok..." I frown.
Louie clicks on the tv and leans onto my shoulder.
"I have to use all the time I have while I can actually be around you long enough to do this." Louie whispers.
I nod slowly.
We watch this person doing animal impressions and we 'boo' them.
"Get off the stage! No one likes you!" Louie shouts.
I laugh and ruffle his hair.
Louie doesn't stop grinning and giggling even when he's yelling at the tv.
I soon get into yelling also and we make lots of noise.
"What's all this din?" Beakly walks into the room.
"Not hotdogs! I hate hotdogs! Eww!" Louie whines as a dude on the tv tries to set a record by shoving a bunch of hotdogs in his mouth.
"Is this program appropriate?" Beakly growls.
"What's a program?" Louie whispers to me.
"I think the things you get handed at plays telling you about the acts. I don't know what she's talking about." I shrug.
"Well?" Beakly urges.
Louie hides his face and I sigh.
"We aren't holding a program and we aren't at a play. How could a program be inappropriate?" I ask, innocently.
"The television program." Beakly deadpans.
"Y-You mean the tv show?" Louie stutters.
He's horribly afraid of Beakly.
"Uh...sure." Beakly nods.
"It is. We are just watching people show off their talents." I explain.
"Very well." Beakly walks off.
Louie and I go back to watching until the episode finishes.
"Wanna try the extra-extra-extra spicy jalapeños Launchpad got us before we watch another episode?" Louie offers.
"I guess a dare would be good after watching a talent show." I give him a thumbs up.
We march into the kitchen and see the jalapeños beside the extra-extra-extra strong stomach medicine.
"I wonder why the jalapeños are by the stomach medicine." I state.
"Meh." Louie shrugs and we fill tons of different bowls with our different favorite snacks.
We go back to the couch and turn another episode on.
When the commercials are on, Louie and I eat some of the jalapeños.
"It's too spicy!" Louie whines.
"Really? It's good once you get past the spice." I inform him.
Louie takes a bit of another jalapeño and nods.
"Way better." He agrees.
"Time for bed." Uncle Scrooge tells us a few hours later.
We both groan and head up to bed.
"Ugh. I think I know why the jalapeños were put by the stomach medicine." Louie groans.
"Same here." I collapse onto Louie's bed because I don't feel like climbing the ladder to mine.
Louie crawls into his bed with me and we lay there complaining.
"Y'all sure know how to make so much noise, it wakes me up." Huey growls.
"We don't feel good." Louie complains while burying his face in the crook of my neck.
"Of course. This is why we don't eat jalapeños without stomach medicine. How many extras on the spicy were there?" Huey climbs down and starts checking for fever with both of us.
"Three extras." I groan.
"I'll go get the stomach medicine." Huey sighs.
"No! We want you to stay." Louie reaches out and grabs Huey's hand.
"Why?" Huey asks.
"Because I don't wanna be left here without someone to take care of me." Louie whines.
"I'm calling Uncle Donald to bring the stomach medicine.
"Good...cuz I think I'm gonna be sick." Louie starts to cry.
"Crying doesn't help. To the bathroom you go." Huey demands.
Louie obeys and shuts the door behind him.
I suddenly feel a familiar feeling.
We've been through this like fifty billion times, author!
Why are we doing this again?!
"Huey, I'm gonna be sick too." I tell him.
"Uh...to the guest bathroom you go!" Huey shoves me away.
I rush to the bathroom in the other half of my floor, and I get sick completely.
I gasp for air while sitting back only to see Webby at the door.
"I knew you didn't follow through with your hygiene. Now you are sick because of it. Deal off." Webby crosses her arms.
That's why.
Thanks a lot, author.
Webby still comes over and hand me some mouthwash though.
"Why did you come to the guest bathroom when you have one in your room?" Webby asks, now putting a damp cloth on my neck.
"Louie is sick too. We ate the jalapeños." I say after rinsing my mouth.
"Oh. So you were keeping up hygiene?" Webby now starts pressing a damp cloth to my forehead.
I lean into her, tiredly.
I just nod.
"You can't sleep on the bathroom floor." Webby points out.
"Why? I'm just gonna get sick again and have to come back." I reason.
"We are hoping you won't get sick again. Maybe it's out of your system." Webby suggests.
"I doubt it." I mumble.
"Well if you're gonna stay here, your gonna stay here comfortably. I'll be right back." Webby promises.
She exits the room and I lay back.
I miss how Webby was gently dabbing the damp cloth on my forehead.
It feels like forever since she's been here.
I look up at the clock.
It's been a good 20 minutes for sure.
Where is she?
My body is overwhelmed with heat and my stomach twitches weirdly again.
How could I already be getting sick again?
Doesn't change the fact I'm gonna be sick.
I don't necessarily want to narrate that so...moving on!
I rinse my mouth out again and fall onto the bathroom floor and sit there with my knees hugged tightly to my chest once again.
"Dewey? You haven't been back to the room." Huey whispers.
"You just missed me getting sick again." I say with fake enthusiasm.
Huey breaths a laugh and struggles to reveal himself in the light of the bathroom where I am.
I realize that Huey struggled to do so because he was literally carrying Louie who is asleep.
"Louie is only like an inch shorter than us. Why in the world do you think it's a good idea to carry him?" I try not to yell for fear of waking Louie.
"He's a LOT lighter than us. I'm sure he'll decide he's not eating for days because he's been sick and he's afraid to eat now. Besides, I've carried you before." Huey rolls his eyes.
"Is Louie like scarily underweight?" I ask, felling a bit worried.
"No. Just at the very bottom number of what we should weigh for our height and age." Huey explains.
"Oh. Ok..." I run out of words.
"Louie wouldn't move anywhere unless I carried him. He's clingy most times, but never anything like when he's sick. He refused to lay down and he wanted me to rock him in our rocker like how the houseboat used to do." Huey frowns.
"You didn't know that? I'm surprised you got Louie to stay asleep. With me, he will wake up if I start rocking at a different pace. Normally, it's best to hand him over to Uncle Donald." I laugh.
"I guess so. I can barley take care of you with having to deal with Louie." Huey exclaims.
"I guess it's fine. Webby's been here. She should be coming back." I check the time again.
It's been about 30 minutes since she left now.
"Are you coming back to our room?" Huey asks.
"I don't think so. I got sick within a 25 minute range apart from the two times." I try and make my words make since.
Huey just nods.
"I brought you some medicine. It's in my back pocket though and I'm holding Louie." Huey tells me.
"Nice try." I deadpan.
"Seriously. If you want medicine, it's in my back pocket." Huey sighs.
"Dude, I'm not taking a pill that's been in your gross pocket. Also, I don't feel comfortable grabbing it from that particular location." I try and sound smart.
"Nice wording. You've never cared about gross stuff before. Besides, the pill is in a container. I'm not a monster." Huey blushes.
"Hand me Louie and you can put the pill on the counter." I offer.
"You are probably pretty weak being sick. You shouldn't do that. Besides, I don't want to risk waking him." Huey points out.
"Oh yeah. I forgot." I grin.
"You will feel better if you just grab the medicine. It's not like you don't steal stuff from my or Louie's pockets all the time normally." Huey recalls.
"Yeah...so did you hear about Louie's magazines he's been keeping in our bathroom? Woah." I change the topic.
"Duh. You didn't know?" Huey asks.
"Not until today..." I imply.
"Yeah. Don't go near those!" Huey laughs.
Louie shifts in Huey's arms and we both hold our breath hoping he doesn't wake up.
"Hurry and get your pill so I can take Louie out of here." Huey turns around so I see the plastic baggy containing the pill inside his pocket.
"Gross. No." I make a disgusted face.
"Enjoy your stomach ache." Huey starts to leave.
"Wait! I'll grab it." I sigh.
"And take it while I'm watching." Huey adds.
I nod.
I grab the bag containing the pill out of Huey's pocket and he sorta jerks away weirdly.
I have the bag in my hand though.
"What was that?" I tease.
"Me freaking out at the awkward touch." Huey turns his head.
"Ok..." I smirk.
"What?!" Huey yells.
We look at Louie who is still asleep before sighing in relief.
"You said it wouldn't be awkward to grab something from your pocket." I point out.
"Well it surprised me because I couldn't see." Huey argues.
"Sure it did." I stale from taking the pill.
"I see what your doing! Take the pill." Huey commands, catching onto my plan.
"Fine." I growl before shoving the pill down my throat.
"Thank you. Was that so hard?" Huey huffs.
I shrug while smirking.
"Whatever. Goodnight, Dewford." Huey leaves.
Now I feel all alone.
I don't necessarily like it.
Normally my brothers don't leave me alone.
I fidget uncomfortably as I sit alone on the cold tile.
"Dewey? Oh. You're still here. Sorry it took me a while. I had to go to a couple different rooms across the manor." Webby enters with a big bag of stuff.
I nod slowly.
Webby pulls out some couch cushions and lays them down on the floor.
She puts some blankets and pillows on the makeshift bed and has me lay on it while propped up.
Webby sits beside me on another couch cushion and she starts gently dabbing a damp cloth on my forehead again.
"Thanks, Webs. I owe you. For a lot." I whisper.
"It's what a good girlfriend should do. I'm sorry for telling you I hated you a little bit ago." Webby apologizes.
"I'm sorry for giving you a reason to hate me." I grin.
"That's why I love you. You always seek improvement and take the blame when you don't have to. Huey would make sure everyone had some blame that was involved with an event, and Louie would just con, cry or cuddle his way out of it. Huey also adds extra events to the blame that we didn't really have to point out or take blame for. You are different. You know what you did, and hold yourself responsible for it." Webby kisses my cheek.
I blush.
"I don't really have a long, sweet speech about you. I'm sorry." I nervously laugh.
"See? You're funny too! And honest. Not too honest, but the perfect amount. You're a good boyfriend." Webby smiles.
"Really?! Me?! You're the one down here on the bathroom floor with me while I'm sick! You're the one that cleaned my whole room and bathroom when there were literally worms and sand in some of my clothes that you put away! You're the one that even went as far as reorganizing my whole room and bathroom and making things better, and safer. Yet you say I'm the good one here?! I look horrible compared to you!" I exclaim.
"But you don't. You don't get what I see I you. For one, you are the most sweet and caring big brother ever. Huey is great, but you are willing to get ridiculous and silly or be comforting whenever Louie needs. Trust me, no one else could handle him. He's a tough one." Webby jokes.
"Yeah. I guess. I sorta hated on him during the tenderfeet thing and I hate myself for that. I can't believe I was so stupid." I frown.
"You realize that though. You realized it, took action for it, and made it up to Louie. That's just what you Dewey." Webby used my pun.
I breath a laugh.
"Another thing I love about you, is that you try and stand out. You are super outgoing and fun. Louie tries to fade away so he can get sympathy and Huey just takes care of everyone and doesn't particularly care about any sort of attention. He only really likes his work to get noticed. Nothing else. I think he acts too innocent." Webby tells me.
"Fun and outgoing? You realize I have ADHD, right?" I point out.
"Another thing we have in common." Webby admits.
"I didn't know." I blush.
"It's fairly obvious. You can put your ADHD aside whenever your baby brother wants to just cuddle with you. You allow that. Some siblings would get tired of that. Some siblings wouldn't allow that at all." Webby combs a hand through my hair.
"Yeah. He's VERY affectionate. For some reason, he hasn't figured out that people think it's adorable and would do anything he wants if he acted like that all the time." I shrug.
"See? You're clever too! Not book smarts like Huey, not even street smarts like Louie, but clever with your jokes and theories." Webby lists off.
"You compare me to my brothers a lot." I grin.
"Yeah. I'm showing you why I'm not with any other brother of yours and why I'm with you. You triplets are so different. I don't really get why Louie is your baby brother and Huey is your big brother if you are triplets, but I guess I don't have to understand everything." Webby says.
"Yeah. It's just like that. While Louie has the most teenage personality out of all of us, he's also still the baby. Huey has always been the one that offers the most support and comfort. He also keeps us in line with his book thingy. Has anyone else noticed pterodactyl was in the 't' section of his book when he was looking for terra thingies?" I ask.
"Right before terrible twos I think. That book is nonsense." Webby laughs.
"Now try and sleep so you can feel better tomorrow and keep up our hygiene deal." Webby sings.
"I already feel a million times better. Thanks, Webby." I grin.
Webby stays with me until I wake up again in the morning.
"Good morning, lovely. How are you feeling?" Webby greets me.
I stretch out and yawn before replying, "A lot better."
"That's good. Louie actually has a bell that he's ringing giving out requests on what all he thinks he needs. It includes, soda, grapes, cake, cheese puffs, and extra buttery popcorn. That's just the food he's had brought." Webby laughs.
"Aren't the adults suspicious? I mean, all those foods are the exact opposite of what he would need to get better." I point out.
"No. Louie has been throwing fits and acting adorably helpless. I think he's caught onto your idea of getting what he wants by acting like that." Webby groans.
"Haven't you been here the whole time? How do you know about this Louie thing?" I frown.
"Granny came by to check on us and she told me all about it. Plus, the bell rings every few minutes." Webby sighs.
"Let's go see." I suggest.
Webby stands up first and she helps me to my feet.
We go to my room and see Huey trying to calm Louie while he throws a fit trying to get to his bell.
"Hey, Lou Lou." I wave.
Louie lights us and runs to pounce on me.
I keep my balance since he is actually pretty light.
"Dewey! Huey won't let me have my bell. I wanted to bring the portable tv in here so I can watch tv." Louie explains.
Huey and Webby roll their eyes.
I piggyback Louie to the couch, grabbing the bell while doing so.
Louie claps and giggles like if he were really a baby.
"Oh Duckworth! Beakly! Whichever one of you could bring the portable tv in here!" I call.
Soon, we have the tv on, popsicles in hand, velvet blankets, and some sort of foot bath thing going.
I'm not sure what to call it.
"Well, at least they are using proper hygiene." Huey tells Webby.
"Yeah. They got their hair specially washed and styled, they took some sort of crazy rainbow bubble bath things, and they have embroidered robes on. I mean, they have sorta had some kind of spa day." Webby sighs.
I don't know why they are watching us.
It's creepy.
"Duckworth! Beakly! We want face masks!" Louie rapidly rings the bell.
Duckworth and Beakly come in and paint face masks on us before setting the timer for how long they should be on and leaving.
They are going to prepare our sparkling water we requested.
"I have an idea." Webby smirks.
"Guys, I'm taking the bell away and telling everyone you are faking it if you don't let me paint your nails." Webby crosses her arms smirking.
"Paint away. Green please." Louie holds out his fingers.
Webby gaps at the scene.
She follows through with paining our nails in our favorite colors though just for enjoyment.
"Let me try something to get this to stop." Huey says.
"So...I'm embroidering some of Webby's bows with your names on it and you have to wear them if you don't want us to rat you out." Huey thinks he's got us.
Louie and I share a smirk before shouting, "Adorbs!"
We laugh.
They get so angry that we are following through with their ridiculous requests.
Huey actually does exactly what he said and he clips the bows in our hair.
"How much do you think we can mess with them?" Louie laughs evilly.
"I don't know. Let's see what they have next for us. It's so funny that they think getting is to act what's considered 'girly' will bother us." I point out.
"Ok. Thing most precious to Louie. Put this green glittery phone case on your phone." Webby tries.
Louie does so and pretends to be in love with it.
We snicker as Huey and Webby get even more furious.
They put makeup on us, which is the hardest to pretend to be ok with, after the face masks come off.
We wear pretty much everything down to sparkly slippers and boas before they finally give up.
"This has to stop anyways! We just tried the easy way!" Webby groans.
"Easy?! You put us through an hour and a half of beauty treatments! We are wearing makeup, bias, sparkle slippers, hair junk, jewelry, and nail polish. That was ridiculous! It was funny you thought that would bother us so much." I burst out laughing.
"Yeah really. We live in the 21st century. We don't mind sparkles and some paint that goes on your nails. They really thought that would make us give up getting anything we want!" Louie teases.
Huey and Webby tattle and we have to spend the rest of the day doing chores.
"Hey, Dewey. Sorry about earlier. How's the sweeping going?" Webby asks awkwardly.
"All good, love." I tell her putting down my broom to kiss her.
Webby stops me.
"You are gross and sweaty now. Practice your hygiene and then you get a kiss." Webby says.
I roll my eyes.
It continues to where I wasn't aloud any sort of time with Webby, by her, if I didn't practice proper hygiene that week.
By the time the week was over, my whole family seemed to hang around me more.
"Well done, Dewey. You can have your surprise now." Webby kisses my cheek before pulling me into a room.
"What's this?" I ask.
"It's a simulator thing of our perfect date. It's like a video game virtual reality thingy." Webby explains.
"Wow. I should really start doing more hygiene stuff!" I exclaim.
"Yeah! I've got a big long list of more things to add to that too!" Webby unrolls a 7 foot long list.
On second thought, maybe not.
A/N
Hey! Not my best work. I know. I didn't know where I wanted this to go, (That rhymed. Lol!) so I just wrote random stuff. As you can probably tell by now, I am very against sexism and racism. That's why I write sections like the weird makeover thing. Lol. Sorry for ruining everyone's lives! Reviews are very much appreciated. Thanks for reading!
