Joren Joestar's Bizarre Start!


Is the Order a Rabbit? belongs to Manga Time Kirara, JoJo's Bizarre Adventure belongs to Hirohiko Araki. I don't own anything, if I did, Hoto Cocoa is best girl and an Alaskan Bull Worm would be a Stand.

Goddamn those Alaskan Bull Worms.

JoJo is my favorite Shōnen Jump series of all time, because it's badass and all and not filled with filler like Naruto with a weird but amazing ass story and visuals that put it on its own genre.

Sorry I can't make those 「marks」on the corner of words, not even Google wants to tell me what these are so I have to use [brackets] unless one of you guys knows how to use it on mobile. Had to copy and paste those 「marks」to show you.

Mind you, I only watched up till Stardust Crusaders by the time I'm writing, so I'm looking up the wiki. This takes place if Jotaro and Jolyne make it through Stone Ocean unscathed (trying not to spoil) and stop Pucci. This also takes place in the 21st century but the protagonist as old as Shizuka and this took place in 2014.

Hope this one gets even acknowledged, JoJo and Is the Order a Rabbit? does not have that many fics, or even that popular ones. I don't even know if anyone who's going to read this watched Is the Order a Rabbit? Not even a piece of fanart in the world that crossovered these two even though JoJo can crossover with anything.

Really hope anyone reads this, my dreams and effort were put here. Don't read this if you haven't read or watched JoJo, but this goes along the same route as Is the Order a Rabbit? so you won't miss much.

STORY IS NOW!


50,000 years ago, a meteorite crashed in Cape York, Greenland. An excavation team during 1978 discovered that an alien virus spread from the meteor, perhaps for as long as it laid there, it spread all over the world by then. Two workers died of a disease once they had contact with the meteorite but few people who made contact with it were granted powers known as [Stands], beings who take many forms and are invisible to everyone except other [Stand] useds.

The meteor, was eventually entrusted to the Speedwagon Foundation, a world famous organization who specialize in [Stand] users and other supernatural occurrences as well as many other generous things. Eventually, many incidents happened afterward that were crises on a worldwide scale that involved a single bloodline: the Joestar bloodline. The family were involved in conflicts with a vampire, Aztec men of fitness, the vampire again, some serial killer with a hand fetish, the mafia, then the most recent was the priest that wished to reset the universe. All of these were foiled by different Joestar members but the next incident is about to start.

Where does this story lead to?


"Breathe." In a large apartment, a man who looked very old was instructing a teenage boy who wore some sort of mask. "Good, seems like you're learning the Ripple very well, boy."

"Fuck off, old man." The boy ripped the mask off his face. "Dunno if you spit in this thing when you wore it back then. Don't make me breathe you germs." The old man chuckled, the boy quickly set the mask on a nearby table. "Gets itchy in that thing."

"You asked for this, not me."

"Ugh." The boy sighed, scratching his face. "This better get me somewhere." He looked at his hands, briefly some energy flowed through it like electricity. "Yikes."

This boy is Joren Caesar Joestar, age fifteen and second adopted child of Joseph Joestar and Suzie Q, a very elderly couple...like...very elderly. He had black hair that reached down his neck, blue eyes and somewhat of a tannish complexion, being taller than both of his adopted parents and being what people call a pretty boy.

Bishōnen? Joren never thought he was that beautiful.

"You'll get used to [Hamon], but practice it every day or else you'll get old like me." Joseph grinned, pointing at the various wrinkles that surrounded his face. "I look good for my age, don't I."

"Whatever." Joren replied nonchalantly, to the dismay of the Joestar. "Where's Shizuka and Granny Suzie?"

"Don't call your mother granny. Makes her feel old. They're at the park." Joren sighed, his parents could pass for his great grandparents, his sister being seventy or something by now didn't help. "Roses came along with them, so better make your own sandwich."

"Fine." Going to the kitchen, Joren grabbed [Nutella] and some bread. "How's Jotaro and his 'injury'?"

"His face is pretty beat up, nothing life threatening." Joseph sat on the couch, grabbing a comic book he left on the table and presumed reading it. "Having your entire face half sliced isn't very pretty. Wish I was there."

"You would have got in the way. Sure, you fought half naked vampire gods but you got killed once by a vampire." Joseph frowned at the retort. "What's wrong, geezer? You've been too stuck up today more than usual."

"Oh my god..." Joseph put his comic back down. "I got the call from the Speedwagon Foundation a few days ago." Joren bit into his sandwich, finally done making it. "No, they do not wish for you to write another book immediately after what happened with that Pucci guy."

"Aw." Joren sounded a bit disappointed. "I wanted to see Jolyne..."

"Not that, apparently the Foundation 'lost' something." The young Joestar quickly ate the last piece of his sandwich and blinked. "How can they 'lose' something?" He asked, Joseph groaned.

"No, no. Some crazy group of [Stand] users broke in, using their [Stands] to infiltrate the base. They don't know how they knew where their supernatural objects were put or how they even knew which ones to get but they did."

"What did they make off with?" His adopted son asked, Joseph looked at him straight in the eye as the boy joined the old man on the sofa.

"Three things that are extremely dangerous." He explained to him. "First, a fragment of the meteor that gave humanity [Stands], we kept a piece just in case we needed some more users but that backfired. The second is...Dio's Coffin..."

[MENACING]

Joren's eyes shot open, he stood up from the couch. "D-Dio? Why of all things is steal that?!" He grabbed Joseph from the shoulders and began shaking him. "How are you not panicking!?" Joren heard the legend and nightmare of Dio Brando enough to send him wetting. "Is it Pucci's allies? Or some servants Dio had still around?"

"We still aren't sure. We're lucky nobody died in the entire raid." The Hamon and Stand user told him. "But the third thing is even worse."

"What's worse than what's left of Dio being stolen?"

"It's the Red Stone."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Oh...my...god." Joren collapsed onto the sofa in disbelief. "Why did you let the Speedwagon Foundation with it? Did you even get rid of the mask that it includes?" Joseph shook his head. "WHY?!"

"In case Kars ever came back." The old man replied simply, yawning as if this wasn't important. The boy proceeded to grab the man and shake him again.

"He's in space! He isn't going to come back for a long, long time!" In the most overreactive tone he can make, Joren began yelling at him. "The Red Stone, the thing that grants the the ultimate form of life...you just left it? HOW ARE YOU FUCKING CALM?!"

"Hey, I'm old, going to die soon. I can't do that with a body like this!" That's the senility that Joren was most familiar with. "Jotaro is too busy trying to reconnect with his family, Josuke is too busy with normality, Giorno...dunno what he does! Being Italian and probably being a dick like Caesar!"

"Is it because he's Dio's son?"

"Likely."

"How about me?" The boy offered himself. "I have my [Stand] ready and I learned enough [Hamon] for at least one adventure." He spoke. "The only problem is going onto the plane. You don't even need to go, old man."

"Eh? What did you say?" Joseph deadpanned, lending his ear to the teen. "Speak up, my oldness is trying to hear your stupidity."

"Shizuka better not become like you when she gets old." Joren proceeded to stand up and walk around in a circle around the couch, deep in thought which was a habit. "At least your [Hermit Purple] to find their hideout."

"Think I was lazy enough not to do that?" The Joestar took out a photo and raised it into the air. "Took me awhile to not break cameras anymore but here it is." Joren grabbed the photo and stared at it.

"Japan?" He frowned, staring at the photo. "Why is our family somehow always connected there? First is Holly and her husband, your affair, now this." The image of the aforementioned thing was a picture of a map of the world, except that Japan was close up, pointing at a specific dot.

"Yes..." The old man stood up. "I used [Hermit Purple] on a calculator, which I didn't know was compatible gave us coordinates apparently. Led us to a town called Kaanin."

"Is it heavily populated?"

"No, it's a quiet town filled with cafés and rabbits."

"Rabbits?"

Kaanin was a town modeled after European architect to celebrate Japan's allying with Germany and Italy. They experimented on various rabbits in now currently abandoned laboratories a bit distant from the town, once Axis lost WWII, the rabbits were released into the wild. In the current day, Kaanin's now a peaceful town, combining both Japanese and European culture together along with its rather large population of rabbits and cafés.

"It sounds like it's nice to go there for vacation. It isn't as loud as New York and I could sure use some tea." Standing up, Joseph grasped his cane and he walking towards Joren who was still walking in circles. "At this rate you'll run over someone."

"Someone's gonna go there anyway, you can tell the old woman it's...me trying to learn my brother's culture."

"That town's half European in nature." The man told him. "Well then, I'll learn from your own mom then." The boy quickly retorted. "Tell the Speedwagon Foundation I'm going. Need a vacation anyway."

"All you did for summer is play that Wii U and 3DS!"

"Oh yeah, gotta pack that 3DS." He turned to him. "Why did you even keep that mask anyway for Kars? Even you know he can't come back easily."

"2012, duh."


In an empty building, where moss hung the ceilings and walls, the floor being littered with dirt and dust. The sound of a generator roared to life, lights of the building returning, two figures approached each other in an empty laboratory, the computers and other bits of technology not being brought back to life anytime soon.

"Did you get all three of those objects?" The smaller figure asked.

"Yeah, those assassins you hired did most of the legwork, I'm here to deliver." The taller figure looked at the objects placed in the room, one which was a large coffin. "It's hard package and entire coffin, you know how it is after 9/11."

The smaller figure went towards the coffin, rubbing his hands on the casing. "This coffin saved Erina Joestar, her child and her future daughter-in-law. At the same time, Dio and the body of Jonathan Joestar were put onto this coffin once they were rescued and with their weight, the coffin went down to sea. Ironic that what saved a life saved the other life's mortal foe?"

[MENACING]

"Yes, yes." The taller person looked at the two other objects on top of it. "What about those two?"

"This stone?" The smaller figure held the perfectly, round, small orb made of stone. "This stone grants people [Stands], unfortunately it doesn't have the pure concentrate like the [Arrows] do, so it only gives [Stands], no [Requiem Stands] could be made."

"The mask?"

"This mask, it is truly a long story." He placed the stone down and looked at the stone mask. "Dio used one of these to become a vampire. This is the perfect version of that mask, used to create the ultimate form of life."

"Then why aren't you using that now for yourself?" The taller figure backed away in fear.

"No, I do not wish to use it on myself, it would disrespectfully to the memory and spirit of Dio." He spoke out his reasons. "Pucci has failed, his intentions were good but he was stopped by Jotaro's child. His is loyalty was unquestionable and a will that shakes diamonds itself but he should have searched a way to resurrect Dio, not use [Made in Heaven] with himself.

"Wait, wait. Are you saying you want to...bring back Dio?!" The taller man instantly drew a gun of some sorts. The smaller figure looked at him, frowning. "If he comes back, the moment he sees me, he'll kill me."

"Let's cut to a deal." The smaller figure turned to him. "If you help me, I will reward you for your service and convince Dio not to kill you."

"Who says you will?"

"Tsk, tsk. Hol Horse..." The figure turned to him. "Look at the back of my neck."


Joren boarded the plane, looking bored. The old man, Joseph Joestar told him that there was a friend he had helped out with a supernatural issue who lived in Kaanin (wished he mentioned that earlier). Grandma Suzie was told he was going to be on a relaxing vacation, good thing he was taught Japanese.

"Okay...what's the monetary value of Japan?" He tried doing the math in his head, he sucked at math. "Ugh..." His [Hamon] soared through his hand as he tapped his head. "Ow."

Fortunately, Joseph wasn't on the plane, so the guarantee it wasn't going to crash was grateful. "What movies they have on here?" He grabbed the booklet and looked through. "That guy the old man says he has at least one kid..."

It wasn't uncommon there would be some civilian casualties when a situation involved the Joestar bloodline. He was warned that he better not fight in a populated area or even involve anybody besides professional Speedwagon Foundation members, which is likely one of the few pieces of advice he'll actually take from the old man.

"The Rabbit House..." He said, reaching for the seat's remote. "That's where I'm supposed to stay...why am I talking to myself?"


An old man with a cane was wandering through a street, the road right next to him filled with traffic and cars and people screaming in a language he couldn't even understand. "Why did I end up in this country for vacation? Don't know how Suzie likes this place, there's beggars, traffic, and vendors everywhere."

Joseph continued to walk down the street, hoping some his [Ripple] training taught somehow is able to disable his hearing for a bit and he just forgot it. Unfortunately, he felt something come out of his wallet. "What the-HEY!"

He saw a kid run away from him, very small but holding his wallet in his hand. Fortunately, even though he's too old to go after the kid, nobody was too old to use a [Stand].

"[HERMIT PURPLE]!" A purple vine extended from his sleeve, wrapping around the sidewalk like a tripwire and the kid fell onto the floor the moment he walked on it, the wallet dropping from his hand. "There we go." The boy pushed himself up, looking back at him and attempting to bolt for it but unfortunately for the kid, a police officer was bumped into him.

"Hoy, you little thief!" The officer grabbed the kid by the ragged shirt the moment he tried to run. "What are you doing, trying to pickpocket that tourist's wallet?!"

"Screw you!" The boy tried to struggle his way out of it to no avail. This reminded Joseph of a scene in his youth that involved a cop and someone who stole his wallet.

AKA, Smokey fucking Brown.

"Hey! Learn to respect your elders!" The moment the cops took out some handcuffs, something flashed by the boy to Joseph's shock. It was a humanoid figure, its head was covered by a steel, blueish black helmet with golden trims, the visor lifted to reveal only darkness and two glowing red dots underneath it acting as eyes. The body was akin to a nobleman's, a fancy dark and blue coat but no sign of skin was underneath, as the coat was worn as if it was worn and made to not to show even the sliver of flesh underneath as the collar reached all the way up to its head. The neck was covered by some clothing, the matched the coat also and reached all the way to the legs and boots worn above the pants, the boots looked like armor, same design as the helmet with steel and the same blueish black with gold trims. The most noticeable features were the hands, which was robotic and puppet-like in nature, looking like miniature missiles, each one shaped akin to normal fingers. The second most noticeable was the two large, wings behind it, reaching down the entire body, the left one was black, the other was pure white.

"Oh, my GOD! Wait!" Joseph reacted quickly, galloping towards the officer with his cane. "Hang on, officer!"

"Oh, sir! This little thief was caught stealing your wallet!" The cop informed him but Joseph was more concerned for the cop's safety, as this [Stand] was ready to kill him. "I wish I could help you pick up your wallet but I'm busy restraining him." The kid still struggled underneath the cop, doing some effort to escape but the cop was stronger.

"Wait, there seems to be a misunderstanding here, my good man." The old man tried to make a good excuse. "You see, this is my great nephew."

"Your great nephew?"

"Yes, I accidentally put his wallet in my coat over here, he chased me down and asked for it back and tried to run back. I'm sure it looks like he was robbing me but he wasn't." The cop blinked. "I also apologize for his behavior, he's not that fond of people."

The cop's eyes dilated before he sighed. "Alright, learn manners for your elder, boy. If you pickpocket for real, you'll regret it." The boy was dropped down onto the sidewalk, the cop grabbed the wallet from the floor and gave it to Joseph. "Sorry for the misunderstanding."

"No problem, I should be grateful for cops like you watching for us in case of real crimes."

"Okay, goodbye sir!" Before exchanging one more hostile glance with the boy, the cop walked off. The boy picked himself off the floor, coughing out. Of exhaustion.

"Ugh, you old fuck, why did you help me?" Well that wasn't a typical response that someone you rescued says, or what a...six years-old says either.

"Don't worry, I'm a friend." He said calmly. "Look." The boy looked in shock when the purple vine came out of the old man's hand. "See, used this to trip you, will you listen?" The boy nodded. "Good, what's your name?"

"J-Joren." This boy was a boy with few words, it seemed. "What is that?"

"That is a [Stand]. Like your little friend with wings I saw."

"H-How did you-!" The ragged child stepped back surprised, the Joestar finally saw how torn and poor the clothes seemed and how disgustingly thin he looked, obviously indicating he really needed to steal that wallet to survive.

"What were you doing? Stealing my wallet?"

"Look." Joseph looked where Joren was pointing, it was a bunch of buildings, all lined up, all of them looking cheaper than fertilized soil. "You're in the slums, old man. Many people who live here who don't sleep in the shit for houses live on the street, like me. We do this fucking thing to live, I had to grow the fuck up while everyone else played fucking soccer or doing math."

Joseph clutched onto [Hermit Purple], wondering when the boy just might just snap. "How old are you?"

"Never mind that, how the hell do you know about [Earth Angel]?" The aforementioned [Stand] showed up, pointing its finger threateningly at him. "Talk!"

"You're pretty good at English, aren't you?" The much older man noted.

"Only language I know. My [Earth Angel] can blast you into nothing if you don't." From what the description was, Joseph hoped it wasn't like [Killer Queen].

'How does this kid get around without knowing his home language?' He thought before his [Stand] wiggled through his fingers. "This is a [Stand], that's what you or I have."

"A [Stand]? That's what [Earth Angel] is?"

"Yes, [Stands] are manifestations, they can only be seen by other [Stand] users. They take a variety of forms, like [Hermit Purple]-" Two dogs began mating right next to them. "OH NO! NOT NOW! THIS IS MY MOMENT!" Joseph used [Hermit Purple] as a whip and scared the dogs off with the sound. "I swear this country..."

"So, basically before the dogs fucking stopped us, [Stands] can only be seen by other [Stand] users, so happens I'm one of them?"

"Exactly." Joseph nodded. "Even though they're secret from the public, most are excused as demons or supernatural forces." He hoped that these big words processed in the head of this child but he was taking it all well.

"Okay then. Thanks for not getting me imprisoned, old man but I gotta go steal another wallet or something." [Earth Angel] dissipated, the boy walking away but Joseph stopped him.

"Wait, I can't let you go being homeless and all." [Hermit Purple] proceeded to wrap around the boy's leg. Joren wondered if this old man would use the supposed thing called a [Stand] to drag him but he didn't, oddly enough.

"What the fuck are you doing-"

"Do the Speedwagon Foundation?" Joren nodded. "They are the ones who specialize in [Stands] and all the oddities in the world secretly. They could help you get out of...this." They glanced at the slums, still an ugly sight.

"No."

"What? Joseph asked in disbelief. "What do you mean 'no'?"

"The Speedwagon Foundation, it may be known for their relief efforts but what have they done for me? Look at this." He pointed at the slums again. "We're suffering for lifetimes here, disasters are momentary but poorness and the lack of homes can take someone's entire life. Did they ever think of that? Huh?"

Joseph blinked, not saying a word. "I'm going now, unless you got a better option than me talking to some hypocrite organization, I'm going back and living on the street."

[Earth Angel] came back, karate chopping [Hermit Purple] off the boy before disappearing. Joseph then decided to do something drastic.

"How about...you go with me?" Joren blinked, turning back around with [Earth Angel] also.

"Eh?"

And that was when Joseph either made the worst mistake, or best decision of his life, realization hit him like a freight train.

"HOLY SHIT!"

TO BE CONTINUED


[Stand] Name: [Earth Angel]

[Stand] User: Joren Caesar Joestar

Destructive Power- A

Speed- C

Range- A

Durability- D

Precision- B

Development Potential- B

Abilities- ?


Joren's name comes from a classmate I had named Joren, this was before I watched JoJo and I was like...wait...JOREN JOESTAR! His design is based on Tsumugu's from Nagi no Asukara, the most underrated anime ever made.

[Earth Angel] is named after the song 'Earth Angel' by the Penguins. Never listened to it, had to get the name of the [Stand] somewhere.

Sorry if it isn't actually 'bizarre' or barely having Is the Order a Rabbit? yet, this is my first chapter and I apologize but things will hopefully pick up soon.

Hope people actually read this. Review if you like this because a lot of effort I put and support is needed against my existentialism.

Instead of my signature, STAY TUNED, it will be...

TO BE CONTINUED