8th grade year

2/14

'Ok Xion, you got this you can do it!'

If only it were that easy. She had been staring at the jet-black spikey haired boy from afar from some time now and she kept having mental fights with herself as to whether or not she should go up to the guy of her dreams and confess her crush to him. He was just a couple of feet away from her. He was busy talking to his friends and she didn't want to seem rude to suddenly interrupt them. But she needed to either make a move now or never, seeing how lunchtime was about to end any time soon.

"Geez, when are you going to tell him Xion? Time is ticking."

It was her friend Vanille. One of the few friends she had here in middle school since a few of her friends had already entered Twilight High. Vanille seemed like your typical middle schooler; loud, bright, and beautiful but to some people in the school she seemed fake to them. They just couldn't believe how someone could be that happy all the time. But Vanille never minded, she hardly ever cared about what people said about her and that was something Xion wished that she, herself, could do.

"So when do you ever plan on telling him…Huh, Xion?" This time it was Rinoa Heartilly. Another dear friend of Xion's whom she had come to become good friends with at the beginning of the year. Xion had met Rinoa last year but never got the chance to really talk to her like this year and she was grateful for having to have met her.

"I…I don't know…" Xion mumbled out. Vanille heard but Rinoa didn't quite catch that. "Do you want me to call him over? I'll do it to make it easier on you." Vanille requested which only made Xion stare at her in horror. She wouldn't really do that…would she? Vanille took a big breath as she started to yell out the boy's name until Xion completely covered her mouth. "Don't do that! That's so embarrassing!"

The bell then had rung and Xion really did not want lunch to end quite yet. "See, you missed your chance Xion." Rinoa stated as she stood up from the bench and started collecting her supplies. She was disappointed. This was not the way it was supposed to happen…In her mind she had an anime scene going on with sakura blossoms floating about and the boy of her dreams looking at her romantically and accepting her feelings for her.

But of course that was way too cheesy and she knew something like that would never ever, ever happen. So all she had to do was to wait again. Just two more hours and she would confess to him…or at least hoped to do so. If she has waited for 10 months she could wait for 2 more hours.

It was the end of class now and instead of heading his way, she turned her direction to Rinoa and her other friend: Yuffie. Both girls greeted her with a smile thinking she had finally confessed her feelings…oh how wrong they were. "So what did he say?" "Tell us! Tell us!" Xion's gaze fell onto the cement ground. She really wasn't ready to go tell him.

Even though she has liked him for approximately 10 months, she honestly felt like it still wasn't the right time to tell him. What if all this time those stares he would give her across from the classroom were just plain coincidence? What if that one time when he said 'I wouldn't mind being locked up in a dungeon with you.' Was absolutely nothing?

She wouldn't be able to bare the rejection, the one thing that she wanted to avoid so much within her life. But those feelings…those strong feelings that she knew no matter how hard she'd tired, she could never explain them. The happiness it brought her. The way her frown would magically turn into a smile. Her dull blue eyes would become more alive and her whole aura would change drastically. This boy, he was definitely something…

She knew that she wouldn't be able to contain these feelings any longer for she felt as if she did, she would most likely lose it. Rinoa took hold of her shoulders, Xion automatically looked up and locked eyes with her dearest friend. Rinoa gave her a genuine smile. She nodded at her showing that she understood what she felt or from what Xion thought; what she somewhat knew what she felt. "If you don't tell him now you will regret this. Now, go and tell him." She turned her around and gave her a soft push towards the boy.

And before Xion knew it, she was right in front of a pair of bright yellow eyes. She knew she was as bright as a tomato but the shade they were underneath in somewhat hid that flush. "Um, V-Vanitas I wanted to ask you something." She felt those eyes glaring right through her and it made her feel very uncomfortable. She decided to hold herself to keep insecure thoughts out of her head. "I've really liked you for some time and I've wanted to know if…If you liked me back or if you only like as a friend…y'know? So…Do you like me?"

She felt as if she did nothing but blurt out pure nonsense and once she stopped staring at the ground she found Vanitas's cheeks turning an odd purple hue…Was he blushing…? She couldn't tell but she took it as blushing and tried to hold back a giggle. Who would have known that Vanitas Valentine was able to actually blush? ( He honestly didn't seem like the type to blush so easily.) He seemed off guard but without any hesitation he simply replied with: "Sorry, but I really don't have any feelings for you."

Instead of crying, running away, or feeling broken-hearted she felt so relieved. She smiled at him and once again caught him off guard as she gave him a quick hug good-bye. She felt his arm come around her waist and she was waiting for him to tighten his grip onto her waist just like in the movies, meaning that maybe he really didn't mean it and just wasn't sure of what to say within that moment. But no, he didn't do that he just hugged her and nothing more. No hard grip or anything. Just a simple hug.

As she turned around to walk away the pain of rejection suddenly hit her like a bullet. Her vision becoming hazy and she felt the tears wanting to drip down her face. No, she was not going to cry because of this. She wasn't. No. So she held them in until she got home and cried her eyes out. She knew it. Who could ever possibly like her anyway? She was awkward, naïve, and slightly odd to other people's eyes. (Though that one didn't quite matter to her at all.)

So much for her thinking she had a chance.

So much for thinking that there had to be a reason as to why he was put into her life.

Freshman year

A year has passed by and to be honest it still felt like it happened only just a few months ago. Her heart would still skip beats every time she would see him and her face would still turn into different pink hues. Just how was it that she still had these feelings were a complete mystery to her…She always questioned herself as to why she still liked him even though he flatly let out saying that he had no interest in her whatsoever.

Xion kept telling herself that she couldn't continue the majority of her teenage years thinking about a guy that would never really like her or continuing to cling on to him. She didn't want to be like Rinoa whom kept falling in and out love with this guy named Seifer who she had met at a party over at Radiant Garden last year and hasn't seen him since.

They've communicated over the internet and texted each other but from what Xion and their friends were able to see was that Seifer was starting to lose interest in Rinoa. Rinoa of course, was not able to see this. She did love the guy but there were times where she was able to finally see that Seifer no longer viewed her romantically, but in some way or another her mind would do a 180 and she would be back into loving the guy. Xion couldn't help but feel so bad for her.

As Xion was heading to the chorus room she quickly waved at Hayner, another friend of hers, but right after waving goodbye she noticed him. There he was walking to the science building, black binder in hand covered with drawings and pictures of bands. But it wasn't just himthat caught her interest, it was that bear that he was holding. Was it for him? Or for someone else?

Wait, why did it matter to her? She was over him…right? She nodded to herself, yes, yes she was. As she made her way to the chorus room she couldn't help but wonder about the little bear. 'What day is it today?' she asked herself as her fore finger tapped at her chin. Ah! Now she remembered, it was Valentine's Day.

As soon as she reached for the door knob to the room she felt her heart sink in.

Sophomore year

Even though the end of the school year was getting nearer Xion couldn't wait to finally get out of school. She honestly did not like school one bit. She viewed as a place where you would just practice your social skills and nothing more. She didn't view it as a place where you should start thinking about your future and whatnot, no it was a place where you only made friends and just waste your time and not really teach you anything about trying to get you ready for the real world. Well, maybe at her school…

She sighed to herself as she looked at the time on her phone swinging the little pink seashell charm back and forth.

4:24

Honestly, just where was her father anyway? He told her he'd be there in 10 minutes and that was about 20 minutes ago. She let herself bang her back against the wall she leaning onto and slid down to the cement floor, propped up her legs and wrapped her arms around her knees.

Well, didn't she look like your typical anti-social teenager?

She unzipped the small pocket from her backpack as she took out her ipod and listen to some music and hopefully the time would pass by quicker that way. She turned it on, found the song that had been insider her head for the past 4 days and played it. It didn't take that long for Xion to enter her own little world that is until she saw him again.

There he was, right across from her. He seemed like he was hitting up on Selphie and Kairi. The 2 girls were giggling about something he said and he just had to have that stupid smirk of his pasted onto hismouth. She didn't know why but she felt this sudden urge to just punch anyone in the face. (She secretly hoped that Axel would appear at any moment)

They were still giggling and suddenly she started to see static as if she was staring at a broken television. That static cleared and instead of it being a hot summer day, it was a nice breezy afternoon in April and instead of there being two girls it was only one. Instead of him smirking he was smiling down at the girl. Hewas smiling, his eyes glistening, taking her into his mind as if it would be the last time he would see the girl happy.

The girl started to close in on him as did he. Hisstrong arms slowly encircling around her waist, hands grabbing a hold of her hips and pulling her body close to his…The girl felt as though she was in a trance.

Hemouthed something to her…the girl didn't get it. What did he say? Hismouth opened again, nothing came out. No sound whatsoever.

Xion…

It was a faint whisper at first but the sound of her name grew louder and louder till she heard a shout, "XION!" She was now back into the real world. There standing in front of her was that familiar silver chevy Tahoe with her father looking out the window. Dear god…She quickly got her things as she literally jumped into the car. She couldn't help but over look at her father's side to see Kairi and Selphie giggling once again and him just looking amused. She really wished she could just melt into a puddle at that very moment.

Why was her heart still attached to him?

Junior Year

English class was never really much of a bother to Xion. She always kept an average grade in that subject and never really had much of a hard time in this year's class. Her teacher, Ms. Lulu, was out for the day and their substitute teacher was still not present yet. While waiting for the teacher to come in, Xion decided to read instead of talking with her classmates (Since she really wasn't that close to anyone in her class).

As she read she couldn't help but over hear him and other two idiots talk about this girl; Olette. A really bright, happy-go-lucky girl who was close friends with Pence and Hayner. The three boys kept saying how much of a prude she was and that maybe she needed a little 'fun' to hopefully loosen up a bit. Xion started to get tensed up; she just wanted to walk out of the class room or just yell at them to shut up.

But it wasn't until she heard his comment that just made her want to slap the shit of out him. He was explaining to them that he should make a note signed under Hayner's name and tell her to meet inside the storage room and from there he and the other two could have some fun in there. She stopped reading. She couldn't stop listening to him. Hekept on chuckling and snickering about the actions hewould like to do with poor Olette. She wanted to leave. She wanted to puke right there and then. Just how could he…? How could someone talk about that so casually?

She didn't pay any attention throughout the rest of the day in any of her classes for hiswords kept repeating insider her head. Her 'love' or 'liking' or whatever small ounce of feelings she had for him had completely vanished and were replaced by disgust and hatred for him.

The next day Olette wasn't there and Xion could only think of the worst. Xion had finished her assignment for the day and continued reading her book until she felt a presence standing right beside her. The person wasn't right beside her; instead the person was standing right in front of her, staring down at her with evil glinting yellow eyes. She was grateful by the fact that she did not jump out of her seat.

"What you reading there?" he asked with a certain tone in his voice. Seduction..? Was it? Her eyes looked back down to her book as she answered him, "The Chronicles of Vladimir Todd." She answered back with her soft voice. "Hey," he covered the paragraph that she was reading with his hand, "I know you over heard me yesterday, I was just joking. You know that right?" he was still using that 'seduction' tone within his voice and his face was coming closer to her face. Instead of butterflies and her stomach doing summersaults, she felt a chill go down her spine.

She was afraid of him.

Ocean blue eyes locked with poisonous venom yellow eyes.

He bent down to her eye level and made himself closer to her. He got closer to her, his mouth near the tip of her ear. It almost looked like he was going to nip at it but instead he softly whispered to her," I know you still like me, so if you ever need some comforting I'd be happy to help. And don't worry about Olette, I heard she had a stomach ache." Xion backed away from him. She glared at him hoping to show that she no longer felt anything for him and that all she wanted from him was to drop dead.

But in the end he just kept on frightening her as he quickly took a hold of her chin and forced her to look at him. "Don't kid yourself; I know you still want me." Her heart started to beat rapidly of the fear slowly rising within her. He loosened his grip on her and let her go as a sick smirk crossed his lips before telling her goodbye. Xion did her best from that day on to keep her distance from that maniac.

As she entered the bus and sat down next to Yuffie, Yuffie noticed Xion looked uncomfortable. "You ok?" Xion merely nodded and gave the spunky girl a small smile. "Yeah, I'm fine it's just that…Vanitas was just being so weird today that's all…" Yuffie didn't hesitate to comment back, "I told you that guy wasn't all that great! I've been telling you this for like 2 years already." True, the only one who had been telling Xion to avoid this guy was Yuffie. The past two years that Xion had still contained feelings for that boy Yuffie would always warn her about him.

But did she ever listen? No. She was too blinded by her feelings to even notice. She had wasted about 3 years of her life thinking about that boy. Wasn't she just pathetic?